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Matthias

Freeform Reform Roses are red. Violets are blue. These kinds of poems, make me want to spew. Forget the rhyming scheme, maybe add some lines that make sense. Then throw in some metaphors, so that words become substance. I'd like to use this poem as a critique to what I think of a few poems around h...

Matthias

As great as this sounds, how true can it be when you couldn't even find your own mistakes in your introduction? Believe the most fundamental rules is: Double-check your posts before posting. Though, guess it is kind of cool that you're available. >_>

Matthias

There were even better days before Surrealchat. Quite a bit of irony in what's happened since then.

Matthias

Sounds like a one-sided relationship, unconventional indeed.

Matthias

Probably the best I've read from you. I mean, it's cliche and short, but in this case it hits a harder topic than most.

Matthias

Sounds pretty good with a beat as an "accidental rap" session. >_> Ahaha. Loved it.

Matthias

http://www.roleplaygateway.com/the-roleplayer-and-writer-guide-naming-conventions-t45589.html That link right there - the bomb-diggity. Chopped full of useful information! Now then, without all the sarcasm - I'd be glad to help you in any way I can. However, I wont do it publicly(never have, never ...

Matthias

Then you probably shouldn't be offering much advice based on that statement alone, or be selective in what you're advising.

Matthias

Helping the community is great, and I commend you for it, but don't forget to help yourself along the way as well. Be sure to re-read your posts thoroughly and make sure that you, yourself, can understand what it is you're wanting us to comprehend because if you can't, then we probably wont be able ...

Matthias

Not that informative, really, and that is bad. You gave one(horrible) scenario of four that are listed. This could probably be better understood if you wrote a detailed scenario of each, with their own separate post. Maybe brush up and fine-tune this thread a bit more to help better understand, or, ...

Matthias

Hope UnderINK doesn't mind my posting here. =P Sorry I don't visit Gateway as often as I should/could, but I've been busy, even at home. However, you are more likely to get a hold of me on MSN at: ConSpirito@Live.com If you add me, be sure to state that you are from Gateway and your username, otherw...

Matthias

Co-writing with a friend. Tipping The Pail The last orange moments of the day catch rides on the backs of dragonflies to menace my path with their fleeting shadows. “Chirra chirra” sings the Frog King hypnotically from the long grass stems, “Won't you rest? Won't you rest?” But the woodpecker drums ...

Matthias

Personally, despite the rhyme scheme, I loved the poem overall - or this first part. Second line, first stanza, I find reads better as,"your embrace, my delight" but that's nothing major. There were a few good lines, but I wasn't completely hooked on wanting to read a second part until com...

Matthias

I haven't the slightest idea as to what is going on, just two unique names and something about a Goddess. :oops: then spring, to summer and back to autumn. You don't need to state this, which is what makes the entire piece awkward(the beginning), for me. Try combining the first and remaining first h...

Matthias

I'd suggest not centering any part of this, portrays poorly, and the font color doesn't make it any spiffier.

Matthias

I yearn the simple profound of my hand reaching, received and in return, tightly grasping. So that I am here knowing that I am to sense, formulating. Of my uncertain summing, until in my equation you are adding to my x its value determining, analogies for this hearts tender conceiving. Surely, never...

Matthias

Well, I got a laugh from this.

Matthias

Do you like this poem, truly like it and wish it could be better? Are you still in the progress of revising it and if so, how many times do you plan to do this? Would you revise even further, or at least, play with the structure if a critique was given?

Matthias

Seated front row, we're all gonna fall

Your best line in both poems, in my opinion. However, you need to work on punctuation and in turn, that will make both of these a far better read with a more complete impact.

Matthias

Why write a history for any character that isn't meant to be roleplayed with? I mean, when you're looking at a fighter's character bio are you really going, "What the fuck did they do seventeen years ago?!" It's a waste of time. <_<

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Matthias - Posts

Re: Yeoman's Poetry Repository

Re: Experienced Roleplayer taking "Students."

Re: Discussion: Good 'Ol Days

Re: The Only One

Re: They Say...

Re: Tormented

Re: Pretty much new to role play- help!

Re: Offering services, unofficial, unlicensed mentor

Re: Offering services, unofficial, unlicensed mentor

Re: Helpful Ryu-hints for roleplay romance

Re: Mentor Contact and Questions

Re: Come Stay A While: Poetry

Re: Thoughts In The Dark

Re: The Silver Bell [Story]

Re: The Dark Dragon Ninja, a story i wrote awhile back

Re: Come Stay A While: Poetry

Re: One Blood - Entity

Re: ...

Re: I write;; I draw;; I dream;;

Re: Training Hall-Arena OOC, Advice, Opponents and Camaraderie.

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