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The 13th Pregnancy

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The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby RedPitbull on Sun Oct 05, 2014 6:40 pm

NOT FOR KIDS UNDER 13


The 13th child, as it says is about a woman who gives birth to her 13th child and an unknown 14th, dying during child birth. She gives birth to a demon child, but this story will not be religious in anyway. It will, however, have religious elements to it, but won't be completely religious. Taking place in modern times.



Introduction

Mary Beth was panting like a dog after a mile run, her stomach bigger than most, she knew something was wrong with this child. The priest stood by her bedside. Priests weren't normally part of the birthing process, but Mary was a religious nut. The Priest was shaking for he knew nothing of this sort of birth. Mary screamed bloody murder as her stomach appeared to be bubbling, causing the midwife to rip off the blanket that was concealing her giant belly. The bubbling started as a normal, slow bubble and began to grow stronger until a finger ripped through the womb and flesh of the mother. The priest and midwife looked in horror.

"Oh my heavens! Mary Beth, your child..." the midwife shrieked before fainting. No one could do anything but watch as Mary's stomach bubbled and suddenly ripped open, the tearing of the flesh and screams of the two children which ripped from the womb, breaking her ribs, causing more blood to spill out onto the floor. One child sat up in the blood and remains of his now dead mother, and the other fell onto the floor beside their dead mother.

The father entered the room, seeing his dead wife, he couldn't stand the sight, tears welled up in his green eyes, letting a few tears fall, he fell to his knees and wept. After about five minutes he wiped the tears, and went to find a container, after finding a cage, he quickly picked up the twins, one by one using their tail and shoved them in the cage, putting a blanket over the cage, and walked out, bringing the cage with him, "Father, I presume you know what to do now" he asked without looking back, knowing that his kids were all at school, made moving to a new home easier.

In their new home, Archer bought a queen sized bed, just big enough for him. The kids were all happy to be in their own rooms, instead of having five kids in a room. The demon twins were in their own box, big enough for two great danes, strong enough for a bull down in the basement.

Tell me what you think :)
Last edited by RedPitbull on Thu Oct 16, 2014 11:01 am, edited 5 times in total.
Animal rescue is to lose your mind, but in losing your mind, you awaken your soul.

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Re: The 13th Child

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby RyunaSiege on Sun Oct 05, 2014 7:03 pm

This is scary. I have not had children and know a lot of people who have children. Also I have 14 siblings. Though only a few of us share same parents. :P

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Re: The 13th Child

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby veve on Sun Oct 05, 2014 7:20 pm

Wow...intense. I LOVE it!
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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Sparkle on Sun Oct 05, 2014 7:53 pm

I think your sentences are kinda long. Use some periods :)

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby RedPitbull on Sun Oct 05, 2014 8:15 pm

Ryuna;Thank you for your comment

Veve; Thank you, I hope you'll read more.

Sparkle; Thank you, I will.

Chapter one will be kinda short.

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby RedPitbull on Sun Oct 05, 2014 8:20 pm

Chapter 1
Its been a year since the death of Archer Beth's wife, the twins were still locked up tight in their cage, he was reminded each day of her death. Through the year the two had grown to be the size of a five year old, with the bottomless stomach of a teenager. Archer was at his wits end, their hunger only seemed to grow and he wasn’t sure how much longer he could stand to feed these demons. "How much meat do you eat" he asked as he dropped more in, knowing quite well of his kids inability to answer back.

As he began to secure the lock on the cage there was a knock behind him before Lisa, his oldest daughter, appeared halfway hidden by the doorway. She asked in a voice that seemed careful "Dad? When can we see them?" The question should be, will they ever be seen by anyone? Archer looked at his daughter, who grew so much in the past year without her mom. "When I understand them more" he said before giving a small smile, "You look so much like your mother now." Archer stood, mentioning his wife didn’t put him in the mood to be near these things, "Now lets get your brothers and sisters off to bed."

As the children were all tucked in for the night the children's cage in the other room began to open, the lock not completely done when Lisa had interrupted Archer earlier. After minutes of cautious scratching around the box, a young boy came out and quickly made his way to find fresh meat. Khan, the boy, scrambled up the stairs of the basement where he and his sister had been held and into the closest room. He was quick to find the sleeping figure and jumping on top waking up the youngest, Ella, with a frightened gasp turned scream when he bit her. The bite was short of fatal as Ella's scream startled Khan, only taking a bit of skin and hair with him as he quickly hid under the bed.

The screams that came from little Ella woke up the rest of the house, Archer was up and into the bedroom before he even could think of what could be wrong. Seeing his daughters head bleeding he tore a piece of his shirt off and pressed it against her wound. He scooped her up into his arms and went off to the front of the house, somehow managing to grab his keys on the way out. While Archer had been taking care of Ella, Lisa ran around the house to see what could have harmed her little sister. She spotted Khan's tail under little Ella's bed and she grabbed it, pushing down her fears as she used it to bring him back down to the basement. He fought with her all the way, claws digging into the floor and attempting to attach himself to the railing. Lisa found their cage, where the girl Puma was still sleeping soundly through all the noise, and threw Khan in before locking them up tightly. Lisa was quick to go up the stairs, taking extra precautions to lock the door behind her before going to calm down everyone else.

Archer had buckled Ella in their car before driving like a mad man to the nearest hospital, looking over at his youngest as much as possible to make sure she stayed awake. When they arrived the staff were quick to get the girl into the Trauma Ward. Archer was forced into staying in the waiting room where he had a moment to page Lisa, feeling his ability to breathe was shrinking away. He asked her to take care of everyone while he was at the hospital and begged for her to not let ANYONE near the basement. He knew he would have to deal with the twins when he got home, but for now he couldn’t leave Ella. Neither of them deserved to be with anyone for what happened today and, especially for last year.
Thanks to Ky-Lin
Last edited by RedPitbull on Thu Oct 16, 2014 11:04 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby RedPitbull on Thu Oct 09, 2014 12:56 pm

*waits for comments*

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby veve on Sat Oct 11, 2014 2:18 am

*starry eyes* So cool...I love it!!! I've now become addicted!

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby RedPitbull on Sun Oct 12, 2014 6:12 pm

Chapter2
After the night at the hospital, Archer brought home Ella, and put her to bed, letting her sleep in the living room since it was closer to his room.

The twins were locked in their box, the father in his study section of the basement. He had moved the twins to a steel cage so he could study them without risking any kind of outbreak, it was chained and padlocked all around. As he was looking on the computer, the closest thing he could find to them was the Jersey Devil. He continued reading, not aware that his 12th daughter had just entered the room.

Normally any approaching person or noises would set them off but something about her placing her hand on their cage seemed to sooth them.

”Miranda, step away from them, you saw what happened to your sister!” he scolded as she had started to open the cage.

”But daddy, I think I can help you understand them” she stated.

”Go to your room!” her father demanded.

Sighing, Miranda went up to her room, closing the basement door behind her. Instead of going to her room, she grabbed her keys and helmet, and headed to grab her bike, as she got to it, she hadn’t noticed the group of kids that were across the street.

”If it isn’t Miranda Beth” one of them said in a mocking tone.
”Where are you going? Finally getting a bed for yourself?” another chimed in.
”Don’t all of you share a bed?” another asked.

”Don’t you dweebs have something better to do?” she asked, as she mounted her bike. She began to ride off. One of them threw a rock at her, hitting her on the helmet, causing her to fall off her bike and scrape her knee.

She started to stand up to see the damage, as she looked up she saw a blur and suddenly there were two kids standing there, looking around like idiots. Miranda stood up and looked toward the lake, seeing a body laying there. When she looked back, the other boys were gone, and a few spots of blood in their place.

”What the hell?” she muttered under her breath. All three bodies were by the lake, half eaten, when she looked to the waters edge, Shere and Khan were drinking water.

When they looked up, they met Miranda’s eyes, they began wobbling towards her. If they wanted to harm her, they would have killed her already. She slowly bent down, and waited. Shere went back to the basement, and crawled back into the cage, and fell asleep.

Once Khan reached Miranda he began to look at her knee, and placed a single claw on it, causing her to flinch, she could almost see the gears turning in his eyes, after he removed his claw, the scrape was gone. Looking up, she noticed the bodies had attracted the attention of the gators "Khan, can you help me move these bodies?" she asked as she lifted one and drug it to the lake, she placed it on the shore for the gators to get, carful not to get too close. Khan grabbed the other two without trouble.

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Alice55106 on Sun Oct 12, 2014 6:22 pm

this story is really good, cant wait to read more :)
she cries inside because she has no one to make her happy
she can't find it in life on her own because she only knows what it is like to be lonely
happiness has left her since...

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Nitori M. on Sun Oct 12, 2014 6:56 pm

Whoa...this is amazing ^^ suspenseful and great. I'm intrigued. I await for more ^^
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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby veve on Sun Oct 12, 2014 7:30 pm

Whoo!!!! Keep going! You literally have four people over here waiting for the next chapter! We love it!

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby RedPitbull on Mon Oct 13, 2014 12:43 pm

Working on Chapter 3.

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby RedPitbull on Thu Oct 16, 2014 9:18 am

Chapter 3 in progress, please share the link and help me get more readers.

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Pazeem on Thu Oct 16, 2014 9:52 am

I'm behind on this, starting with first post. Attacking the others at a later date.

I agree with Sparke: Use more periods. Reading this out aloud would cause asphyxia. It nearly does so, just reading it.

"tears welled up in his green eyes, he soon wiped the tears, " This transition is way, way too fast. Structure (three equi-sized paragraphs and one shorter to end it) will suffer from a slower transition, however. Perhaps make it almost made too slow by adding another paragraph. Perhaps a focus on something else in the room? The mother's last gurgling blessing/curse/cry for help?

Midwife fainting? Those I've encountered are made from sturdier stuff, but we'll let it slide, due to the abdominal rupture and dramatic effect. ;)

Gender-issue: "Father, I presume you know what to do now" _she_ asked


Lastly, this story has great potential and I will love to see where it goes next.

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby RedPitbull on Thu Oct 16, 2014 11:12 am

Well the midwife fainted because she had not expected the stomach to rip open, and no heads were visible.

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby AppleSauce on Fri Oct 17, 2014 9:34 am

Ooo how dark and twisted this is! I love it~ I wasn't expecting the three boys to be killed by the twins. About what age would you say Miranda is? I'm curious as to how the father will react when he realises she's a bit partners in crime with the twins, he'll be like "o god more demonic, murderous children" anyone would think she's quite murderous even though she didn't kill them but because she helped get rid of the bodies! Creepy~

I look forward to reading more and I just assumed the error that Pazeem pointed out was a typo, typing she instead of he I get quite a lot when I RP in general haha. Although there are a few mistakes, I almost like the fast pace of the story, it makes it rather more, thrilling but at the same times doesn't leave room for suspense, it's like a win lose situation XD but all in all it's real good and like others have mentioned it has great potential and is at an awesome start!
Get cracking and write Chapter 3! Haha
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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby RedPitbull on Thu Oct 23, 2014 1:42 pm

Chapter 3 will be short, but 4 will be long.

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby RedPitbull on Thu Oct 23, 2014 1:49 pm

Chapter 3

Early the next morning, Miranda could smell the rotting body, not only that, she could hear news reports, and a gun shot rang through her bedroom, she threw over the blankets, and ran outside, ”Stop shooting!” she shouted, two police officers grabbed her and held her back, she was still screaming in agony, ”They haven’t done anything wrong” she cried out. Another cop pulled out the now dead alligator.

”This’ll make a mighty fine purse” he laughed.

Miranda squirmed wildly as if she were having some kind of fit. ”No” she screamed as the cop raised his gun to his shoulder, the gator in his sights. Miranda kicked her feet up, her shoe flying into the water, scaring the gator deeper into the pond.

”Get her out of here” another new man shouted out. The two cops took her upstairs to her home. Once they reached the open door, the officer knocked on the door, a few minutes later Miranda was still squirming, and crying, her father came to the door.
”What are you doing to her?” he demanded.

”She is interfering with us taking care of these alligators” the officer said in a dry tone, he moved past the father and headed inside.

Miranda let out a really loud scream and flailed as the cops took her to the bedroom and locked the door and left to talk to her parents. Miranda was kicking the door and walls wildly. After her anger wore off, Miranda calmed down and realized the pain she was in, getting out of her room, she went and got two ice packs, then went back to her room, locked the door, and put the ice on her forehead, and foot.

Miranda dozed off and took a nap,

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Re: The 13th Pregnancy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby RedPitbull on Fri Nov 21, 2014 5:17 pm

Chapter 4

It was dark and storming when Miranda stepped outside, closing the door behind her.The twins were following her close behind, but completely invisible in the storm and night. Miranda paused to listen to the crickets, and ciotyes in the background, her eyes closed as a twig snapped. She spun around towards the sound.

"Well, well, well. What do we have here?" came a familiar and eery voice. "Isn't it odd you came to the lake after what's been happening?" he asked, stepping closer.

"Officer tree, I was taking a walk" she explained, quickly.

Before she knew it, the officer had his meaty hands around her waist."for a small price, I can pretend you were never here" he said close to her ear, she could smell the cheap booze and smoke from his mouth as he spoke. Suddenly he had her against a wall, his hands wandering all over her body, she couldn't escape. He started to fiddle with her zipper, causing her to push back against him, but it was no use. At the failed attempt, he got more violent. She screamed and he slammed his mouth on hers, her lip now bleeding. Once he started kissing her neck, the blood drop fell to the floor.

"Get off of me!" she screamed, pushing him harder, her eyes squeezed shut. Suddenly the 172lb man was off of her and she fell to the ground. She was crying heavily. All she could hear was the sound of ripping clothes and skin, the crunch of a bone, then nothing. The last thing she felt was the twins around her, protecting her.

The next day she woke up in the hospital.

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