Hm, I remember posting here before. While back, but I do recall. Then it was only a temporary thing, thanks to my situation back in high school, but now I fear the reason for posting here is something else entirely. I've come back after several breaks, hiatuses, whatever you'd like to call them. They were lapsing moments in my time here, and it has seemed like every time that I return that the site loses more of its luster and simply gains more overcomplicated superficial features that have no real point.
Suffice it to say that this time I neither plan nor wish to return.
It seems like more and more my efforts to craft a story here fade and fall by the wayside. I do my best to present that a nation, roleplayed, can prove to be a setting for grander stories, a backdrop for adventures that have not yet been written. At this rate it seems like they shall never be, and though that saddens me, I think I understand. Perhaps they will be, someday, here or somewhere else - perhaps I will even have a part in writing them, though after the past few months my desire to write at all has faded significantly. The hobby is neither enjoyable or fresh to me any more, and has begun to take on a visage more like that of work than anything else.
I would like to apologize to those who planned on plotting with me, or had plots ongoing with me. If you have my contact information, perhaps we can discuss things further. I feel that I no longer wish to roleplay, it is not fun for me anymore. Writing, legitimate writing, I believe is calling me, if I am to continue with this hobby. Roleplaying, especially roleplaying here, is creative stagnation and it curtails my ability. I already look back on the posts I had written a year ago, a year and a half, and I wish I could do as I did then.
It seems that I am no longer welcome in my home here, and while I am grateful that RoleplayGateway has proved, at least for me, a Gateway into the internet, I feel that it is no longer a welcoming place. The userbase now seems either unfamiliar or hostile, and I am met more often with scorn and disdain than welcome. Perhaps, were it the Gateway of four years ago, I might feel more welcome, when my friends still lingered here in the heady days of my literary youth.
But it is not.
DemiKara and I both are becoming more and more disenfranchised with the prospects of staying, and quite simply are no longer comfortable writing here. We do not enjoy what we write, nor do we enjoy writing with the memberbase. It feels as though, in the past year, I have endured more hostile words and dealt with more misery born of this site than anywhere else. This place is not healthy, and I, as well as my fiance, have decided to leave.
Again, my apologies to those who wish to write with us. Message me if you still desire my contact information. I am willing to talk, to be civil, if you are.
DemiKara says:
I used to love this place, especially when I first foudn it. It was simple, and the users seemed friendly. Perhaps I've changed enough to no longer find their jokes or their teasing funny. I suppose that's what it must be, college changing my perception on life, making me less willing to put up with things when I'm tryign to de-stress.
I've popped in periodically thoughout the summer, looking for RP, looking in the usual spots, and couldn't find it, nor coudl I find users willing to set up an RP, unless I joined a plot that I, with college, an internship, and running an organization, simply don't have time for.
There's no room on this site for old hats, I think. No room at all. I had hoped over the summer I could take up RPing again. Well, the answer is clear. Not here. Not anywhere, not for awhile. I have lost my drive to roleplay entirely.
This place has caused me nothing but stress and sorrow each time I come. I will no longer be coming here, for there's no need. I want to concentrate now on my life, my writing, and my fiance. Not on petty squabbles and mockery of others.
I'm sorry to say, though I've posted before, this time I must go and not return. Before, I hoped to return each summer, to a family of RPers that welcomed me. Now? Now I hope to never return to this sad place again.
I'll miss some of you, some what, though not many of you a lot. If you have my contact info, then feel free to contact me. If you don't, PM me here. I'll still get the emails and perhaps I'll answer you, perhaps share contact elsewhere. I rather doubt it.
Frank Herbert wrote:"Thufir, what're you thinking?" Paul asked.
Hawat looked at the boy. "I was thinking we'll all be out of here soon and likely never see the place again."
"Does that make you sad?"
"Sad? Parting with friends is a sadness. A place is only a place."