Preface:
Amy's mom jumped,as her father walked in. She broke a dish,and cringed,especially as she saw his expression in the window. Amy was up in her room,doing homework. Her mom was thankful for that.
"Why the hell did you do that?" He yelled at her. Amy would probably hear it,and she was hoping,she wouldn't come down.
"I-I'm sorry. You scared me,I didn't mean to!" She said,as he slapped her. She fell to the ground,her face burnt,and a tear formed in her eye. He kicked her in the stomache,and she gasped,as the breath was knocked out of her. She saw Amy's face dissapear,from behind the door.
"I pay for those damn dishes,and you have to go,and break them!" He yelled,at her. Even from the ground,she could smell the alcohol on him. He grabbed a handful of her hair,and pulled her up,his face in hers.
"I-I'm so sorry!" She yelled as he punched her twice. Once in her right eye,and then one across the nose. He threw her on the ground,as he started to walk away,she heard footsteps on the stairs. He probably wouldn't hear,he was drunk.
She felt her nose,it was bloody. She stood up,walked to the mirror and examined the damage. Some black was forming where he punched her.
I walked into my room,crying. It had gotten worse this time. Mom had a black eye,and a bloody nose. I grabbed my journal and began to write.
It got worse today. Yesterday,it was just a busted lip,but today,he gave her a black eye,and bloody nose. Why is he doing this? I know he lost his job,but mom told me he lost his job before.
Mom told me of that time,before I was born. They had just married,and mom wasn't even pregnant with me yet. A slip in the economy left the job he was working for broke. When Mom got pregnant with me,he finally got a job,and we moved into the house we're living in now.
I never heard of him beating her then... Why is he doing this to our family. He won't stop drinking,he started smoking again...He's beating my mom! Amy stopped,tears staining the page. She threw the journal up against the wall,and screamed in fury.
"Look at me. Writing in a journal! Like it will take all my damn worries away!" She screamed. She collapsed back on her bed,bursting into a fit of tears. Of course you could always take your worries away... A voice in her head said. Amy smiled,as she considered the peacefulness of heaven.
She reached for the small pocket knife under her pillow. She held it in both her hands,and layed it on her bed. Amy got up,walked to the door,and locked it. She put her vanity chair there. She grabbed the pen that had fallen to the floor,from when she had gotten a sudden burst of fury. She grabbed up the journal,and tore a piece of paper out. She moved across the room to the vanity,and started in on writing.
Dear whom ever may find this,
I can't take this world anymore. My mother is being abused,neither of us can do anything. My boyfriend dumped me,for the snottiest,hottest girl in school. My father is a alcoholic,wifebeating,job-less,loser,who put this family in the Hell it is in now. I choose this way out,so I can enjoy the peacefulness that is death.
You peaceful,dead daughter,
Amy.
Amy looked down at her best script writing,and walked over to her bed. The knife was waiting for her,there. She picked it up,and pulled of the holder. She threw the holder on the floor,and got ready to end it all.
She slit both her wrists,and was basking in the pain. The blood came out a dark red,and Amy smiled,as she slipped into peaceful,unconciousness..
Why Do I Feel,
This Pain Inside?
It Won't Go Away,
Even After All The Times I've Cried.
This Pain Is Overwhelming,
It Makes Me So Condescending.
I Can't Think,
I Can't See.
Is The Blood I've Shed,
A Big Red Sea?
-My Private Suicide-RizaMustang24
Preface:
"Anna,tell me you're going to get off the drugs." My dad pleaded,sorrow in his voice.
"I'm trying,I'm trying. " She said. My dad sighed as he thought.
"Onlytonight. After this no more. Our son needs a mother who will be there on holidays,birthdays..Everyday! If you start rehab..maybe I'll ;et you live her while you get everything back." He said,his voice cracking.
"Thank you,Joe! You don't know how much this means to me!" She said,excitment in her voice.
I embrace my mom,who smelt strongly of cocaine,marijuana,and other substances,that I don't recognize.Dad put a hand on my shoulder,as I stepped away from her. She smiled,weakly down at me. She looked so much more torn,and weathered then when I was a kid.
Her smile wasn't the strong one I knew. Her lips always used to be plastered in a bright red,that gave her a cheery aura. Her hair was limp,and looked dead,very different from when she still lived with us. Her hair used to be alive,and had a certain shine to it. Now it was just black. Nothing more to it. Her eyes had lost the precious shine they once had,replaced with dead bulbs,that had not a spark of happiness.
"Alex,my baby. How long has it been?" She asked,in a very weak voice.
"Five months." I said,knowing exactly how many days she had been gone. I had counted the whole five months five days,forty three minutes,and two seconds. I don't know why I keep track,but it was something I had to do.
My dad led her into the kitchen,as we sat down for dinner. I had set the plates earlier,while mom and dad talked. Though they didn't think I heard,I did. I replayed the whole thing in my head,a small tear forming.
Of course,they both said the same thing,everytime she showed up on their front porch. I thought to myself.
Later,I walked back up to my room,tired,and full. I lay in my bed,hoping she would go to rehab. I wanted my mom back.
I turned out the ligt on my nightstand,and fell into a deep sleep full of nightmares.
I awoke,early in the morning when my father awoke,as he did on Saturdays when he worked the early early shift. I looked at the clock. Four 'O Clock.
He usually made me a bowl of cereal before he left,so I got up,still groggy. I opened my door,and walked down the stairs. I saw my father,his hand on his head,as he stood by the couch where my mom was asleep.
"She left..again."He said. I knew what 'left' really meant to him. He would have made her stay,but she had left to early for him. There was probably a considerable amount of money missing from his father's wallet. I sighed,and sat on the bottom step of the stairs. After a moment of silence,my father seemed to come back to present time,and started walking back towards the kitchen.
"Come on,kiddo." He called to me,as he made my cereal. I followed,saddened,about not getting my mom back,yet.
Theres no demons or everlasting flames
No devil or eternal darkness
Just the black hole my heart has become
-My Personal Hell-taquila32
OOC: First installment of their journals/lives. i might write some more later.
