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RP ACADEMY - Power'Lord and Circ

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Re: RP ACADEMY - Power'Lord and Circ

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Power 'Lord on Mon Jul 02, 2007 9:38 pm

Power 'Lord runs outside of the house and catches up with Syril, who is 3 metres away due to his slithering. "Come on, Syril. You're too slow. Let's save SaintlySoul" Power 'Lord says and picks up Syril and carries him through the forest. "Look, there's an exit" says Syril. But before they can get out of the forest, a psychic storm, neither of them know where it came from was the tower 5,000 metres away. In the tower, SaintlySoul is tied to the wall. "You shouldn't have done that!" says SaintlySoul. "Why not?" says a dark figure in a cloak, looking out a window. The dark figure turns around to reveal it is the Janitor from the Hall Of Doors. "It's my job" says the dark figure. Meanwhile, back in the forest, the psychic storm has hit Syril and made him turn against our hero. Syril bites Power 'Lord on the arm and blood starts rushing out. Power 'Lord tries to suck his blood back in. "It's no use, Power 'Lord" says Syril. "You'll never see you're friend again".
Time To Go Boingy Boingy?

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Power 'Lord
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Re: RP ACADEMY - Power'Lord and Circ

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Circ on Wed Jul 04, 2007 3:03 pm

You make references to a psychic storm, but you don’t say what it is, where it came from, how it is affecting your character, or why your character appears to be resistant to it. This is where details are helpful.

There are also questionable behaviors you place on another character, namely Syril. I would like you to stop doing that, as when you enter a role-play with several characters, you may be tempted to, and they will not appreciate it. Instead, just play your character, and leave major environmental factors to the GM.

Was there even a point in going into that house other than saying, “I miss my friend?” How did engaging in all those pleasures (name a few; was he eating, playing a board game, or what?) effect Power’Lord? Does he have chocolate éclair smeared on his face? What happened before he left to chase after Syril? I want details!

So, re-write your post accordingly. Try to spice it up, as well. Not just “Power’Lord exits the house covered in chocolate,” but more along the lines of “Power’Lord strumbles out of the cottage with a streak of chocolate filling across his cheekbone and on the tip of his nose.” As usual, respond in a new post, and do not edit the previous one.
conditio sine qua non

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Re: RP ACADEMY - Power'Lord and Circ

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Power 'Lord on Fri Jul 13, 2007 11:36 pm

Circ, I have too many things to do. I mainly go on Pokemon Crater now, I have two of my own forums to catch up with and I can't possibly throw this into that. So, very sorry. I have to quit. Bye! Machine: This message will blow up in your face in 3, 2, 1...


KABOOM!

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