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Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

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Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Remæus on Wed May 24, 2006 10:02 pm

Found this humorous.

Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0
Comparative Trial

Last year a friend of mine upgraded from GirlFriend 6.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that it's a memory hog leaving very little system resources available for other applications. He is now noticing that Wife 1.0 is also spawning Child Processes which are further consuming valuable resources. No mention of this particular phenomena was included in the product brochure or the documentation, though other users have informed him that this is to be expected due to the nature of the application.

Not only that, Wife 1.0 installs itself such that it is always launched at system initialization, where it can monitor all other system activity. He's finding that some applications such as PokerNight 10.3, BeerBash 2.5, and PubNight 7.0 are no longer able to run in the system at all, crashing the system when selected (even though they always worked fine before). During installation, Wife 1.0 provides no option as to the installation of undesired Plug-Ins such as MotherInLaw 55.8 and BrotherInLaw Beta release. Also, system performance seems to diminish with each passing day.

Some features he'd like to see in the upcoming wife 2.0.

1. a "Don't remind me again" button
2. a Minimize button
3. An install shield feature that allows Wife 2.0 be installed with the option to uninstall at any time without the loss of cache and other system resources
4. An option to run the network driver in promiscuous mode which would allow the system's hardware probe feature to be much more useful.

I myself decided to avoid the headaches associated with Wife 1.0 by sticking with Girlfriend 7.0. Even here, however, I found many problems. Apparently you cannot install Girlfriend 7.0 on top of Girlfriend 6.0. You must uninstall Girlfriend 6.0 first. Other users say this is a long standing bug that I should have known about. Apparently the versions of Girlfriend have conficts over shared use of the I/O port. You think they would have fixed such a stupid bug by now. To make matters worse, The uninstall program for Girlfriend 6.0 doesn't work very well leaving undesirable traces of the application in the system. Another thing -- all versions of Girlfriend continually popup little annoying messages about the advantages of upgrading to Wife 1.0.
Bug Warning

Wife 1.0 has an undocumented bug. If you try to install Mistress 1.1 before uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files before doing the uninstall itself. Then Mistress 1.1 will refuse to install, claiming insufficient resources.

Bug work-arounds: To avoid this bug, try installing Mistress 1.1 on a different system and never run any file transfer applications such as Laplink 6.0. Also, beware of similar shareware applications that have been known to carry viruses that may affect Wife 1.0. Another solution would be to run Mistress 1.1 via a UseNet provider under an anonymous name. Here again, beware of the viruses which can accidently be downloaded from the UseNet.
Tech Support Suggestions

These are very common problem men complain about, but is mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 6.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a Utilities & Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is indeed an operating system and designed by its creator to run everything.

It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 6.0. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Girlfriend 6.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 6.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this.

Some have tried to install Girlfriend 7.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original system. Look in your manual under "Warnings - Alimony/Child support". I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and deal with the situation.

I suggest installing background application program C:\YES DEAR to alleviate software augmentation. Having installed Wife 1.0 myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their cause. The best course of action will be to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE. In any case avoid excessive use of C:\YES DEAR because ultimately you may have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will return to normal. The system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the GPFs.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high-maintenance. Consider buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend Flowers 3.1 and Diamonds 2K. Do not, under any circumstances, install Secretary with Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of Luck,
Tech Support
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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Aelita on Thu Nov 22, 2007 5:26 pm

It sounds like a big head ache waiting to happen. I think I would steer clear of this, but that's just me. I think it would be simpler, though, to just stay with the Girlfriend 6.0 for the sounds of it.

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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Lillium Jonathans on Sun Nov 25, 2007 12:07 am

Wow, what a detached and capitalized way of talking about relationship problems. I understand how the guy feels like his wife is all of a sudden not so much the sweet girl he had dated, but does he have to refer to women like technical applications? Of course, there are many ups and downs in a relationship, but that is to be expected. It's just too idealistic to go into a relationship believing that there would be no downs at all.

The wife, too, should stop forgetting the fact that even though she has married this man, it doesn't necessarily mean she can suddenly take full control of his life. Too tight a hold will only end up restricting the other and damaging the relationship.

But seriously, the man should realize that he can't have a mistress without his wife feeling unhappy, a healthy relationship should not involve a man finding a mistress. The whole entire point of him marrying her is that he loves her, she takes a place in his heart, and there should not be space for another in the same way.
unpleasantness* The only thing chimerical is a short-tempered persona who takes frustrations out on other good-willed people.

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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Ryand-Smith on Sun Nov 25, 2007 8:12 am

Its a joke, miss, a joke. Ableit, if one does not catch the lingo, one might not get it, but its a joke about the hells of computer upgrades, and trhe typical BAD THINGS that happen in a relonship. Its a sort of "What is the sterotypcial american marage... in technical support form!" type of thing

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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby aeleon on Sun Nov 25, 2007 9:24 am

LULZ. That's pretty rude, and I love it.
As you recall, you know I love to show off,
But you never thought that I would take it this far.
What do you know?


Fancy a Butcher's?

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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Lillium Jonathans on Sun Nov 25, 2007 12:58 pm

Ryand-Smith wrote:Its a joke, miss, a joke. Ableit, if one does not catch the lingo, one might not get it, but its a joke about the hells of computer upgrades, and trhe typical BAD THINGS that happen in a relonship. Its a sort of "What is the sterotypcial american marage... in technical support form!" type of thing


I get the lingo, sir. Just looking at it from a differnt perspective. Not saying I hate it, but wow, look at our capitalized world.

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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Lithitemir on Sun Nov 25, 2007 7:10 pm

Why not just buy multiple computers, then you can run, Wife 1.0. Girlfriend 6.0, Girlfriend 7.0, AND all the other programs such as Pokernight 10.3
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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Eymber on Mon Nov 26, 2007 4:16 am

That is, sadly, very true though. I read it and laugh, yet I see that in my personal experience, It's Not Far From Real.

I know that when I got married things DID change. I do not recommend said action until at least mid to late 20s.

[is 20.]

Other than that, I'm going to show this to my husband, and point out the c:/YES DEAR and C:\APOLOGIZE part specifically.

I'm looking forward to seeing his reaction. It should be comedic.
...Arise and be all that you dream....

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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby quidhala on Mon Nov 26, 2007 5:50 am

I would like to see a side-by-side comparison between Wife 1.0, SW Wife Veranda, and Wifux 8.02 "The Vexing Vixen" on similar hardware.

I hear that Wife 1.0 is simple and elegant package that has been proven to be highly stable under continuous operation, but has some down sides. Are these inherent in all current generation OS's?

WS Wife Veranda claims to be user friendly and is certainly attractive, but I have heard it may not be backwards compatible with my older hardware and has had critical security risk problems; I.e. the “Old Boyfriend” exploit, and the “Childhood Dreams” worm. Also I understand I may not be able to play any of the new games coming out (Regular Intercourse 2) if I don’t make this update, even though I am currently running SW Wife NW. Is this fair?

Everyone raves about Wifux 8.02. They say it is easier to install now and provides the user with a level of control that is unsurpassed. I've heard people say this is really the one to go with for the independent thinking man. Is it true that it requires high level maintenance and daily updates to it’s “/fashion” directory (hat.conf, jewlery.conf, shoes.conf, etc…?) in order to run stably? I don’t mind that many popular titles (e.g. Dishes 2.0) are incompatible with this OS, but I would like to run a version of Kids 2.3.4 eventually. Will this ever be developed for Wifux?

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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Aelita on Mon Nov 26, 2007 5:21 pm

<< I wouldn't know...but I will take your word for it. ^^

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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Vexar on Mon Dec 03, 2007 12:04 am

This thread helped me with my purchase of girlfriend 7.2 I was thinking about wife 1.0.. However with the new Bista release of Wife I was thinking of waiting for them to get the bugs worked out with it. I learned that if not, my serial port will be too big for the plug-ins for the new hardware of Wife-Bista release. Thanks for the help!

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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Blindsite on Fri Dec 21, 2007 1:53 am

ROFLMAO I seriously cracked up while reading this. Though I am a bit confused as to what kind of woman "WS Wife Veranda" repersents. Hot nice girl with emotional baggage?

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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby quidhala on Fri Dec 21, 2007 3:57 am

WS Wife Veranda represents the too-young-for-you trophy wife.

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Re: Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Myth on Wed Jan 09, 2008 4:53 pm

ROFL!
This totally made my day!

Acually, I was thinking of purchasing one of the Boyfriend systems, but a friend of mine just recently had problems with hers.
She tried to uninstall it but apparently there's a bug that keeps it hanging around.
:(
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