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Making posts more descriptive and longer!

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Making posts more descriptive and longer!

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Zetsumi-san on Tue Feb 09, 2010 10:29 pm

I've always had trouble making detailed posts and even if i try they still end up short. I have never really liked typing unless its fun and this is so yeah HELP ME ROLE PLAY GATEWAY!

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Zetsumi-san
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Re: Making posts more descriptive and longer!

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Ninjasaur on Tue Feb 09, 2010 10:32 pm

You should send Alias a PM with your problem. He helped me a lot and I highly recommend him.
"Rock is okay but Scissors needs to be nerfed." - Paper

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Re: Making posts more descriptive and longer!

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Zetsumi-san on Tue Feb 09, 2010 10:40 pm

I sent a mentor a PM they never returned it so i realy have no faith in them... well i figured they would see my need here...

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Re: Making posts more descriptive and longer!

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Ninjasaur on Tue Feb 09, 2010 10:42 pm

Alias might take a few days to get to you but his response is well worth the wait.

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Re: Making posts more descriptive and longer!

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Zetsumi-san on Tue Feb 09, 2010 10:45 pm

see i need help now and i figured users could help me too

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Re: Making posts more descriptive and longer!

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Marionette on Wed Feb 10, 2010 11:10 am

I might be able to help you, but I don't know much about your current level of detail, so I can't really give you tailored advice. I'd like to highlight something first, though. Making posts longer does not necessarily make them better. When the length of a post becomes the only standard by which it is measured, things go way downhill. Then you can get what's called purple prose, or it may not even be extravagant enough to call that. It might just be bloated. Avoid the temptation of writing more just because you think your post should be longer. Write more when you have something to say.

That said, some amount of detail is always appreciated. Writing can come off as wooden if there's no detail to it. Exposition is not evil, it just needs to be used properly.

Here are a few tips (though keep in mind these are not hard and fast rules and there are exceptions to everything as far as writing goes):

Avoid constantly describing everything your character is wearing in excruciating detail. Unless it really matters, it can be a little grating to read entire paragraphs detailing an outfit down to the tiniest accessory, especially if it happens a lot. I mention this specifically because I see it often. When describing clothing, it's often better to throw in bits and pieces as it relates to what's happening (for example, remarking on a character's shoes when s/he puts his/her feet up on a table).

Again, there are exceptions to everything. If a character's wearing a special outfit that's different from their norm, is competing with others via their clothing, etc., those may warrant detailed description. If the state of their clothing reveals something about them (bloodied and ripped clothing, for example, can reveal that your character was just in a battle without you having to say "[x] just walked in from a fierce battle."), that may warrant detailed description. Use judgment.

As an extension of that, try to hone in on and describe things that a) set the scene, b) give others something to respond to in their own posts, and c) are important to your character and understanding him/her.

Point A is simple. People do need to know where they are and what's going on. Here you want to avoid going too in depth - we don't need to know about every single blade of grass - but you still want to cover things and engage your reader's senses. Instead of just saying, "It was a cool, wet morning in the forest. He was angry about it." you could say, "Pale light reflected in each fresh droplet on each quivering leaf. A breeze drifted through the woods, and he shivered as he trudged through the soaking grass. Despite the weather, the birds were getting into full song. He scowled. Who would want to sing on a day like this?" It's not an overload, but you get a stronger mental picture of the forest, not to mention the character's interaction with it. Painting a picture for your fellow players' senses is one great way to add detail.

Point B is about keeping the audience in mind. As a roleplayer, your audience is the other player(s) you're interacting with. Their goal is your goal: to write a communal story. Thus, it's in everyone's interests to think ahead about whether or not your posts add to that story and how accessible the information you present is to other characters. It does you no good to write a long, detailed post about character [x] alone in his room if everybody else is two miles away in the forest. As another example, talking about the super special weapon your character has concealed in his bag might be interesting, but if that's all you put in your post, it isn't much help. Unless someone is able to sense the weapon, no characters are going to know it's there. You could describe the weapon and then have the character leave the bag unattended, providing an opportunity for someone to peak inside or pick it up and see that it's heavier than it should be, etc. You could also describe it and leave it for later for the sake of suspense, but you'd need to have your character do something else that gives people a chance to respond, like waving at someone or looking around shiftily.

Another relevant point is that generally, unless it's unfeasible or if for some reason you really don't want your character involved with whatever's going on, it's best to move toward the action. You generally want to try to get involved with at least one person. Don't set your character off too much from the others unless you're prepared to wait for some action to come to you (which can take a while if it happens at all). If you do want to risk a wait, that's fine. Sometimes it's best to set up a scene and let others come add on to it, and parallel action can be successful. But the more that's going on around your character, the more you're going to have to interact with, thus the more you'll probably be able to write. If there are five players in a roleplay and all five of them go off into their own little area instead of interacting with those who posted before them, it creates a jam; then, there's no one to interact with. If four characters are embroiled in a scene they can't get out of, and a fifth character enters and goes off into his/her own little scene, it's probably going to be a while before anyone can come to them. Again, use judgment.

Point C is more character development. If your character doesn't care about flowers in the slightest, you probably shouldn't describe him noticing some perfectly ordinary flowers that aren't really prettier or stranger or rarer than any other flower. On the other hand, if floral arrangement has always been your character's secret passion, you might describe him taking notice of those ordinary flowers, thinking about how long it's been since he's seen that kind of flower, and then (upon realization that other people are with him) shrugging it off and calling them ugly weeds. This gives more dimension to a character. Describing thoughts isn't something you should do all the time because nobody else is in your character's head, but it does give the reader (if not the character) an insight into your character's mind. It is important for players to get to know characters. We can appreciate the roundness of a character via knowing his or her thoughts even if the other characters can't.

Another reason to mention thoughts is as a roundabout way of providing expository information. Instead of just telling us, you could have your character thinking about the news that had been going around of a young girl that had been murdered just outside town. Stating that it's news clues the reader into the fact that their character could reasonably know it, and your character's reflection can further characterize him or her. Through his or her reaction, we can get the impression that the character is kind, sympathetic, cold, sadistic, even that he or she might have had something to do with it. Again, that part is the part that only the reader knows, but it still helps us get to know the character. It's even better if these thoughts are compounded by actions that support them. (As a somewhat related aside, don't say anything you don't want the player to know, and keep in mind the possibility of metagaming, or having a character know information only the player should know, on others' parts. If you want characters to find out something about your character but don't want to risk metagaming, just hint via actions, not narration.)

Of course, knowing what kind of detail your setting requires is important, too. Where the focus of a game lies can make the difference. You probably won't need to describe your character's hip new outfit in a hardcore fantasy war game, but it might be appropriate in a realistic high school romance game. Likewise, in a realistic high school romance game, you're not going to be describing your character's amazing adamantine blade blessed by the Elders of his people, but it might be appropriate in the war game.

Finally, it could be said that description is basically about finding creative, interesting ways to say the same thing. You could say your character got mad at someone. You could say that your character's face took on a vivid shade of ruby as he snarled a response. Both tell us the same thing basically, but one is a lot more interesting to read than the other. In terms of locations and the things and people we see, we might not necessarily notice every piece of an experience all the time, but we’re definitely getting the sensory information, and a description will resonate with us more if such information is described. In terms of people’s feelings, people don’t go around saying, “I’m happy now. I’m mad now. I’m sad now.” 100% of the time, yet, unless someone’s good at hiding it, we can often tell their emotions. We know what a smile means, depending on the context. We know what folded arms mean, depending on the context. Body language is part of the package.

Sorry if I covered anything you didn't need to know! I thought I'd cover all the bases I could think of just in case.
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Re: Making posts more descriptive and longer!

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Kronos on Wed Feb 10, 2010 1:59 pm

In a nutshell, describe what your character notices unless you want to point out details for the reader. The secret to writing long posts is covering all your bases. Describe your characters feelings, your characters surroundings, and what other characters are doing. Amp it up during action scenes, tone down the description during long chunks of dialogue.

EDIT: A post doesn't have to be long to be good. It should be easy to read. It should get the point across.

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