Princess of Massacre || Rebellion

Layla · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Layla** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 1:01 am

I offer my services to you as well, Sir Eddy.

(Warning: The following is a rant of utmost irrelevance.)

So I'll write my post in a moment but cheese and boiling rice, I read all 700 pages of one of my favourite books ever in, like, a day and it is giving me anxiety. I literally cannot read a book without rolling out the door cocooned in a blanket, bulldozing half of the student body screaming Persian curses at twin fawns. It hurts me. But here's the thing, right, I've been studying for Religion and Society since and now my thoughts are intermingled with "SHE LUSTED AFTER HER LOVERS, WHOSE GENITALS WERE LIKE THOSE OF DONKEYS AND WHOSE EMISSION WAS LIKE THAT OF HORSES."

I can't go on because I need for her to be with Rowan. All I've ever wanted was a sex scene. Is that too much to ask? I'm not even a creep. Really, I'm not. B-but he accepts her for her scars and murderous tendencies and gods, you cannot find a decent Elfin escort anywhere in these realms. My chest. My breasts. My fallopian tubes. Dammit to the lowest depths of Hell, I will find this author and I will make her make them join their sword and sheath. They expect me to wait a year for the next instalment? HIS LOINS WILL HAVE SHRIVELLED FROM DEPRAVED NEGLIGENCE.

Taunbon · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Taunbon** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 5:52 am

@Layla: Elves are boring and mainstream. What is wrong with other races? I mean... why is it nearly /always/ an elf? Why can't they do one about an Orc Woman finding love? That would be amazing instead of either A. *Insert Hero* and Elven Woman or B. *Insert Female Hero* and Elven Man.

Oh! Or someone who looks completely and utterly average! I think I have only read very few fantasies like that. But they have to be treated like that instead of ending up with the female lead because of plot reasons or end up finding out they are super special (I liked the Chronicles of Prydain because they went against the grain). I can't even remember the name of one, but it was... quite odd at times. That one could have done with more plot and less sex scenes. The plot also went way off tangent. (There was this historical fiction like that, and omg, I wish I remembered the title, so I could buy it. It was awesome. The main character was average looking, had no noticeable skills, but through sheer will managed to lead a guerrilla war against the Seleucid Empire and bought his kingdom time to gather its armies. It was so gritty and that guy went through so much pain... man... it was so awesome. I just wish they hadn't thrown in his super secret half-sister, daughter of the general [Main character was a bastard] that died and some... random thief kid for the romance sub-plot.)

And villains! Dear god, I swear I hate when a villain kills the messenger for bringing him bad news... WHY?! What could you possibly get from that? Do you want to know how the protagonist and friends managed to escape your spies? Because they are all too afraid of telling you else getting the eyebeams of death! Gah, I hate when people write Villains to make them as easily hated as possible. I want to /like/ the villain. I want to be able to sympathize a little with the Villain... those are, far more often then not, the best villains.

Lol Layla, who says fallopian tubes!? Who does that?

To finish this minirant, kudos to those that managed and/or bothered to read it all, Dwarfs/dwarves > Elves.

Cheshire_Girl · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Cheshire_Girl** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 7:30 am

@Taunbon and Layla, have you two read Halo? It's an angel and a human that get together and have sex, then the angel gets banned from heaven and has to figure out how to survive on earth because baby daddy just wanted to get into her pants.

Taunbon · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Taunbon** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 7:57 am

@Cheshire: That story... sounds awesome.

moahi · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **moahi** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 8:00 am

@Cheshire_Girl, Tauborn and Layla

Firstly, spoiler alert, and secondly, what is the thing called 'sex'. I am having problems figuring out most of the conversation, but I know what 'fallopian tubes' are, because human reproduction. but 'get into her pants'? I really don't understand...

Cheshire_Girl · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Cheshire_Girl** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 8:01 am

I read it when I was like twelve and I told my Mom about the sex scene so she returned it to the bookstore. Never got to read the ending :(

Taunbon · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Taunbon** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 9:10 am

@Moahi: I wouldn't call it a spoiler alert. If you read the back of the book, it probably tells you something like that anyways.

^ Close enough.

@Cheshire: You talked to your mom about a sex scene? I... don't think I would tell me mom about a sex scene I read.

Cheshire_Girl · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Cheshire_Girl** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 10:09 am

@Taunbon, my Mom is an OBGYN/Women's health care specialist so I told her an angel just gave birth after having sex with a human and then she took the book out of my hands and returned it the next day while I was at school.

@Moahi, Riiiight.

[Akane] · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **[Akane]** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 2:01 pm

Hope everyone is ready to play let's not die game :)

Layla · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Layla** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 4:46 pm

If you want closure in your relationship, start with your legs. Somebody should've warned the angel of that, but that sounds like a book I would read, Cheshire. (✔︎ Taste approved) I hope the sex scenes were steamy. I've always wanted to have sex in the hot springs with mild voyeurism.

I read the Sookie Stackhouse series a.k.a. True Blood when I was 8-10. When I got to the sex scene (the first of many...) I was like, wtf is this, the notebook? It was so romancey, all "oh baby I don't want you to see me impregnate a young woman in front of my supernatural pack because I love you with my shrivelled heart." WEAK.

Where're the screams and agony interwoven with crippling humiliation go? This is vanilla.

Anyway... My mum picked up my book and read it. She liked it, so she got me the rest of the series.

Taunbon · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Taunbon** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 5:37 pm

@Cheshire: Props... I get awkward around my mom if I am watching something with and anything of that nature happens. I am just like.. <.<.... >.>..... *Cough*.... >.> *Cough* <.<

God, Game of Thrones kills me because of that. We both read the books, did so before the show came out, so I know what to expect, but dear god... they could cut back a little. I mean.. my mom is right there! I still go down there Sundays (when the season is on) because that is our thing, but really guys? Really?

Skwidge · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Skwidge** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 5:41 pm

XD Ahaha, yeaaahhh. Game of Thrones :P

Staying relatively out of this matter of sex and frustration, I'm starting on my post as we speak :P

I don't read romance novels. They're boring, sappy, immature at most times, and never very artfully made when it comes to sexual scenes and whatnot.

Taunbon · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Taunbon** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 5:58 pm

@Skwidge: I wish you well on your post.

I just did another, "Meanwhile... at Aku... he is... still... sitting there..." #AkuFillerEpisode

Eddy V. Sovorov · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Eddy V. Sovorov** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 6:23 pm

Meh, Game of thrones never interested me. I watched one episode of it, got bored. Now I know, one episode is not really a good judge of a series, but when all my buddies who watch it tell me "Yeah, all characters that you like are going to die." it turns me off from the show even more. As for all the sex, well I watched Spartacus: Blood and Sand (Which I did enjoy!) and I can do without copious amount of sex scenes. I watch TV series for interesting stories and plotlines! A one or two, here and there are fine, but I have porn for viewing sex, I don't need it tractor-trailer loads of sex scenes in my TV shows >.<!!

[Akane] · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **[Akane]** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 6:45 pm

Uh clarifying the little bit with the Kagene, they attacked everyone in the vicinity, including everyone in the clearing :DDDDDD Have fun not getting clawed to pieces and Aku can have fun electrocuting things kekeke

Eddy V. Sovorov · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Eddy V. Sovorov** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 6:53 pm

Then in that case~.....to page edit!!!! AWAY~!!!!

[Akane] · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **[Akane]** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 6:56 pm

Sorry for the confusion and effort I caused you >~<

Eddy V. Sovorov · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Eddy V. Sovorov** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 7:02 pm

Nahh it's all good. Edited up.

Taunbon · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Taunbon** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 7:05 pm

@Akane: I will just wait a round of posting before doing so again. I am sure it would take them a little longer to get to the camp then to you guys who were closer. *Shrug* I just don't want to rewrite anything.

@Eddy: Huh, I was never into Spartacus. I watched the entire first season, but my entire view on the series was: If someone wasn't having sex, someone was fighting someone else. That, and my prediction for the eventually ending (I haven't see any after the first season), was that after the whole, 'I am spartacus!' stuff when the rebellion fails, he then goes uber commando, sneaks into the camp, kills the roman guy, then goes off to do whatever it is that people do once the credits start rolling.

Saying 'everyone' you like is going to die isn't quite true. The show has a lot of plot (The show is, literally, nothing but plot), it just has a lot of sex scenes because, honestly speaking, sex is an important part of life and people do use it to their advantage at times and that is shown inside the show. I just wish it wasn't so... visual sometimes (all the time), but it is no worse then Spartacus in that regard.

In terms of Roman-based shows, I preferred... Rome.

[Akane] · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **[Akane]** on Sun Oct 05, 2014 7:12 pm

That's fine Taubon :3

Vern's language is very colorful. Had me dying at the last line.

Princess of Massacre || Rebellion

a part of “Princess of Massacre || Rebellion”, a fictional universe by [Akane].

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