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Satire & Comedy

a topic in The Writer's Lounge, a part of the RPG forum.

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A place for original short stories, fanfiction, essays, and the like.

Satire & Comedy

Tips: 0.00 INK Postby Sigurd_Hring on Thu Jan 06, 2022 6:32 pm

In my best Seinfeld impression. "My brother got arrested again."

Today I saw five lesbians walk into the gas station within the three minutes it took me to smoke a cigarette...

That's not a joke...

You know there's an entire culture of women in dresses and skirts who once ruled the world... Romans lol.

Okay so everybody in the audience knows by now that I'm a mutt of Western European descent... Du hasst mich lol.

You know what I don't understand about Nazi Germany? Their infatuation with blonde hair and blue eyes lol.

You idolize giants with blonde hair and blue eyes -- listen.

Adolf Hitler was under 6 foot, only two inches taller than Bruce Lee, with dark blue eyes maybe, but with a black mustache and a combover. You idolize a man who is part African and part Jewish. You're as sheepish as they are in what they do lol.

Everybody nowadays is looking for treasure...

I'm not kiddin, I saw a woman today in the middle of the road picking up glass like she was collecting diamonds. Cars honking and all that jazz, she just kept right on collecting gemstones, putting all them little glass shards in her grocery cart.

The world's fucked up man...

My back hurts... I felt like dissin somebody today lol.

Ain't nothin funnier to me than getting on stage, drunk, and being a comedian, knowin you're just a few evolutionary steps away from being a chimpanzee on stage naked goin oot-oot aht!

You know what else sucks about being an entertainer? When you're on stage putting on this great performance and all of a sudden you have to fart...

Then you gotta play it off like it's part of the show...

I meant to do that...

So they want me to jump back in the game right? lol multiple disses and disrespect from the peanut gallery. Ouch! Only to find out that I helped design their reality lol. Damn that's like a Bernie Mac joke, only black people would get it.

Every once in a while I like to blame somebody for no reason.

I got nothing to blame you for, but fuck you anyway.


Ladies and gentlemen, you've been great. Thank you very much, Elvis Presley style. I'll hit you harder next time.


Tip jar: the author of this post has received 0.00 INK in return for their work.

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