Snippet #1420883

Five o'clock. Even if the clock I was looking at was broken it would still be five o'clock meaning it would have the right time. Broken clocks are right twice a day. M'hm, m'hm. I learned that somewhere from someone but the name and place are somewhat dark like the rest of my memory right up until that day when all I saw was orange, red and yellow flickering. It was hot that day I remember. Still, the clock reads five o'clock and Older Brother needs supper and it's my job to make it for him so that he doesn't have to. Yes I may be too small to reach the stove but the beauty of it is - chairs make good ladders. That and I've never really seen my size to be any sort of hinderer to what I can possibly do for him because he's everything. Which is why I make him supper every single day even though I can't stand as tall as the stove or reach the stuff on the top shelf. I don't even know what I'm supposed to be making for him but I have this big calender I put up in the kitchen with a whole bunch of preplanned meals on it. Older Brother likes to plan out everything because he doesn't like surprises and that's okay because he's awesome just the way he is. I wouldn't change anything about him for the world! Based purely on the fact that I think he's amazing. Call me biased. Doesn't matter much to me anyway.

The walls always look so much taller to me than the look like they do to him. I'm short but it's not my fault - I haven't grown very much in the past.... However many years has gone by since that day when I watched the whole village burn. I was supposed to die that day but Hannah decided not to kill me for reasons unknown. I'm grateful for that and everything but I was kind of hoping that she'd take my soul as fair trade for the huge favour she'd done for me. I felt like there was some kind of debt left unpaid. Unless I was paying for it by living for eternity instead of wherever I was supposed to be by this point in my life.... Part life. I don't know if I consider myself alive anymore despite the fact that I breathe in fresh air and eat delicious sweets and feel confusing emotions. I'm a teenager trapped in the body of a nine year old red haired boy. Everyone's dream I suppose. Although; I do wonder how tall the walls would seem if I was the height I would have been if I hadn't made the contract with Hannah. I wondered if I'd still be with Jim. Would we still be the orphans Jim and Luca McCain stealing and struggling to survive everyday? I like to imagine we would've run away to a palace and become princes of our own country. But Jim isn't around.

I have Leon now though! Now days, I like to imagine that we go off to the fair and play games and run around in the freshly mowed lawn with the morning dew cooling off our faces while we laugh. I don't sleep very well but I like to dream that he adopts me and we live together happily; just the two of us. I push the chair I use to stand on towards the stove and look over at the calender. Fettuccine Alfredo with a creamy cheese cause and carrots. To be fun I like to make a little something extra as my own special surprise even though Leon doesn't like them. He's never gotten too upset before so I doubt he'd be very upset if I added sun dried tomatoes as a garnish. My Older Brother. I smile whenever I think about him and me sitting at the dinner table eating while I swing my legs and ask him what he's gotten up to. Idolize I believe they call what I feel for him. I idolize him; I'm enamoured with him. I won't deny it, I love Leon. Tons. So much that I feel my heart could explode with it. I was warned back when I wasn't with Leon not to develop any real feelings for the person I contracted with because it would lead me to doing my job as a demon badly. I don't see anything wrong with it because if anything I want to everything a hundred times better. I want to make sure the carrots I'm dicing are all perfect and the exact same size and that the noodles boiling in the pot are the perfect tenderness so they aren't too hard or too soft. I was warned that it would stop me from wanting to take his soul. What they don't know is that I don't want to take anyone's soul whether I love them or not. Leon's is super special to me though because if I take it from him I'll feel like I'm ripping up a beautiful priceless painting. Oh! Like I'm setting the Mona Lisa on fire. You can't do that. I can't do that. I can't take Older Brother's soul away from him since he deserves to have it from the day he was born to the day he dies. I still have mine. He should keep his. Not only because I love him either mind you but because it's so beautiful it makes me feel warm on the inside.

"Where is Older Brother anyway?" I'm not supposed to call him that in front of him for my own reasons since he isn't allowed to know that I love him like he's my brother. Sometimes I slip but I always find a way to pass it as me trying to make the whole relationship more realistic. In front of people. I wonder what excuse he's come up with to explain my sudden appearance for I've never heard it. Nor do I really know what his goal is just that he has an intense hatred for someone. I'll kill them. No one upsets Leon that much. No one! Not even me. I popped an imperfect carrot piece into my mouth and chewed on it happily - eating something Leon likes. Hehe. I feel closer to him now that I've eaten something he likes to eat even though that's a really silly way to go about it. Anything. And I mean anything that brings me closer to Older Brother makes me happy.

Because I love him.