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located in The Nightmare Realm, a part of The Cauchemar Circus, one of the many universes on RPG.

The Nightmare Realm

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The dulcet tones of the double bass and jazz guitar playing from the aged juke box in the corner of the trailer was a perfect complement to the near total darkness. Kane reclined on the sofa which took up a fair bit of the remaining space, sitting contended and motionless apart from his foot swaying up and down in time with the beat. He had only a vague idea what time of day it was; if indeed time of day had any great deal of meaning in this realm...

His eyes were closed and a grin fixed to his face as he recalled yesterdays acts and the looks on peoples faces, as some of the audience had fled in terror, been reduced to tears of despair, or simply been stunned into horrified silence at the things they'd seen. And of course, the opportunity to mortify and humiliate another willing volunteer. He smiled as he recalled the thrill of it....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The scene was set with a full-scale hillock, on which was set a small house with the front wall missing so the inside was visible to the audience. Some bouncy, flowery music began to play, and a male clown dressed in a long cotton dress pranced into the middle of the ring.

Kane bounced with frivolity, hearing the applause and laughter ripple around the outer ring as the audience spotted him taking the stage. On reaching the centre he flung his arms out with a flourish. The smile painted on his face was amplified by the genuine smirk his mouth was twisted into. These people hoped to be entertained, but little did they know that Kane intended to entertain only himself.

The music stopped, and Kane affected a faux-female voice.

"Oh my new house!" he trilled, "At last! My new house is ready! I've been waiting so long. Oh! And you must all by my new neighbours! How simply marvellous. Well, I simply must have one of you around for tea right away! Who'd like to come to tea?"

He praced along in front of the audience scanning the faces, most of whom grinned pensively, or lowered their heads, or looked around to see if anyone would volunteer. Nobody did. But then he spied a nicely-dressed young women sitting next to a man who was likely her boyfriend.

"How about you there?" Kane said, still in his falsetto voice, "The handsome young lady there? Come over to my house and have a little tea and cake, warm the kitchen for the first time. That's it, come on down."

The girl turned bright red, but when everyone around her starting clapping, and even her boyfriend seems to reluctantly goad her on so as to not seem over-protective, she got up and ambled her way down the aisle into the ring. Grinned broadly, and it would have appeared sinister had it not been obscured by the more comical grine plastered over it in make-up. He took the girl's hand, doing an excited little skip, and started to lead her up the hill towards the house.

"Oh how wonderful! And what's you're name dearie?"

"Uhm.....Jen."

"Jen! That's lovely." Kane beamed, "Come on in and we'll get to know each other. Oh what do you think of the house isn't it just perfect?"

"Um," Jen said, wrinkling her forehead and looking around at the lop-sided single-room open-front building set with a single table, two chairs and a kitchen countertop. "it's lovely."

"Isn't it just! Now, why don't you fill the kettle while I get out some cookies."

In the background the low thrum of laughter from the audience went on at the rediculous situation, as the waited for the first thing to happen. Their curiosity was satified when Jen reluctantly picked up the kettle, walked over to the sink and opened the faucet. Immediately a small jet of water shot out from the top of the faucet, directly into her face. With a shriek she quickly shut the water off again. A roar of laughter rose from the crowd.

"Oh that's a shame!" Kane said, putting his hand to his chin. "Here allow me."

He walked over and filled the kettle, the faucet behaving normally for him. Jen forced a good-humoured smile and wiped the water from her face.

"Alright dear," Kane went on, "I'll go grab those cookies and why don't you put the gas on for the kettle?"

Jen looked over to the gas hob uncertainly, before letting a smile cross her face, choosing to get in on the act. "Say! Why don't you do it? You seem to have the knack?"

"Oh you don't need to be afraid," Kane laughed, all still in his falsetto voice, "I'm sure it's just a few teething issues with the new house."

Even so, Kane went over to the cooker with the kettle, placed it on the hob and turned one of the knobs. Immediately, a wall of flames shot up the three walled sides of the house. Jen shrieked as everything burst into flame. Additionally, ground fell away all around the hillock, revealing what appeared to be a moat of molten lava!

"Oh that's just my luck!" Kane trilled, facing the audience, "Trust me to buy a house on top of a live volcano! They told me I should have had a survey carried out! Oh well. Jen dear perhaps you'd better come back another time, I've got to sort of few things out with the new pad. Lovely of you to come anyway"

Kane gestured for Jen to leave, but when she got up and stepped out of the front of the house, it quickly became apparent that she couldn't go anywhere because the house was completely surrounded by a steaming lava pit. The house itself was still a towering inferno, and by this stage the poor girl was looking decidedly nervous.

"Erm, how do I get back?" she said keenly, the tension evident in her voice. Kane stepped out with her and put his hand on his chin thoughtfully, looking around.

"Aha!" he said eventually, "The washing line! You can just shimmy across that!"

"Are you serious?!" Jen said anxiously.

"Oh sure you'll be fine, you're a trim, fit young thing. You'll be fine."

The audience applauded their encouragement, and Jen smiled weakly, reaching up and taking hold of the washing line which, sure enough, extended over the bubbling lava. She was certain there must be some sort of safety precaution in place. With some effort, she began to swing herself forward, one hand after the other, slowly making her way across. It was made more difficult by the fact that there was actually a few items of laundry hanging on the line. And in fact it was harder that it looked, and by the time she was halfway across her arms were getting tired and she swung awkwardly, beads of anxious sweat appearing on her forehead.

But just then, from no obvious source, each end of the washing line burst into flame. The audience gasped and Jen screamed. Kane clasped both his hands to the top of his head and yelped.

"Oh hell!" he said, this time in his normal voice, to give the impression something was actually going wrong. "Um, hey someone, the line's on fire! Oh boy...um, what did they tell us to do when that happened....oh yes!"

He ran over to a cupboard under the counter, and pulled out a child's super-soaker canon, and ran back to the moat edge and began firing it at the flames which were spreading along the wasing line towards the shrieking girl, who was looking desperately around for a way to escape. Beneath her the lava steamed and churned, the hot air cascading up against her legs.

"Don't panic Jen," Kane said, still in his normal voice. "We'll have you back and safe in a minute. Here, have a little yourself you're looking a little flustered."

He redirected the jet of water from the soaker and caught her straight in the face. She spluttered angrilly, before screaming "Put the fire out!"

Just in front of her, a pair of pink polka-dot bloomers burst into flame.

"Oh no!" Kane shouted, "My Calvin Klein!"

He redirected the spray once again to try to put out the bloomers, whilst Jen cried out in terror as the line slowly began to buckle. A moment later, the line snapped entirely, and Jen lurched downwards. The audience gasped again, a lot of people standing up to watch, a good portion of them certain they were witnesses a terrible accident. As the girl impacted on the surface, a giant flame went up from the edge of the pit, obscuring the audiences view. Kane clamped his hands over his eyes, pretending to be unable to watch.

After a moment of harrowing silence, Jen broke the surface, shrieking and spluttering. The 'lava' was in fact nothing but a watery mixture of red and yellow gunge, the steam and heat produced from specialised fan-heating set into the pit walls, and the bubbling effects produced by air-jets and lights at the bottom of the pit.

As she climbed from the bit, her heart racing and her entire body shaking, the slime dripping in great gloops from her nice clothes and hair. As it slowly dawned on the audience that she was safe, a ripple of nervous laughter and applause swelled from them. Kane spread his arms to welcome it, taking a bow. He watched, grinning menacing as he watched Jen walk miserably back to her seat, covered from head to toe in gunge, humiliated and shot to her nerves.

That, in his mind, was entertainment...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kane let out a small chuckle, relishing the thought of the next show. Just then from outside he heard female voices. Familiar voices. Vivien and Valerie. That must mean it was some time in the late morning. Deciding it was worth investigating, he stood up, still in his dishevelled clothes from the previous night's revelrie, and exited his caravan, strolling out into the field and looking around.