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Snippet #2417723

located in Aldaria, a part of Infinite Doom: A Dark Lord's Tale, one of the many universes on RPG.

Aldaria

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Setting

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Character Portrait: King Rakar the Mad
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The Noppun Mountains were well known for two things - Dark Elf barbarians, and Red Goblin barbarians. All in all not a fun place to bring the kids. Unless you hated them, and in that case, by all means leave the kids to the stellar day-care centers that Dark Elves provide (disclaimer: Dark Elves do not have day-care centers). But perhaps the strangest thing of all - even amongst barbarians, there is one they call king, one they have determined is the only one smart, strong, and daring enough to lead them.

Unfortunately they kind of forgot what he looks like over the years, and it's a good thing, too, because otherwise no one would believe that the raging psychopath locked away in the palace (really just the fanciest shack the Dark Elves have) was king. He was, technically, due to the last king finally having enough of his shenanigans and making him king so he'd stop and move on to other, more productive shenanigans. The current shenanigans of this barbarian king had to do with the interrogation of an elf scout who was caught stealing supplies.

She was doing nothing of the sort, of course, but the captain of the guard, who ordered her capture, knew that the king would grow bored if he didn't have SOMEONE to interrogate, and besides, interrogations, such as they were, never took long anyway. Shivering in the rags she was left with, the elf scout began to tell her tale, hoping for mercy from the king. She was new around these areas and didn't know he never gave any. That was kind of his deal.

"Oh, great king," said the elf, a tremble in her voice. "I meant no disrespect being near your most sacred mountains. My grandmother, who is incredibly lucky to live within a few miles of your territory, was sick, and I was taking her food and medicine, and..."

The elf looked up and her tone suddenly changed to that of panic.

"OH SWEET MENSTREAS, WHAT IS THAT?" she shouted out.

King Rakar of the Dark Elves was certainly the type who would provoke this reaction. No picture of beauty, he had ash-grey skin, darker than that of the usual Dark Elf, visible veins along his body, a crooked grin carved across his face that clashed terribly with the frown he was currently wearing, and a missing left eye, which people cannot think about without shuddering and wondering where it went. The king stood up from his "throne" (really a three-legged stool, hell for his balance) and walked over to the elf, grabbing her below her chin.

"I'm sorry," said Rakar. "I'm afraid I didn't catch that. You'll have to speak up, and do it more precisely! LOOK ME IN MY GOOD EYE, AND TELL ME I AM PRETTY!"

Rakar pressed his face against the scout, staring at her with his one good eye, and listened to her whimper in terror. The guards outside, forbidden to enter and look upon the face of the king (the last guy who tried is hanging outside. And inside. And in a different building. And scattered around the mountains. And... well, Rakar was creative), ignore the noise coming from inside - they've honestly heard worse.

"SAY IT!" spat Rakar, to get his point across.

"YOU'RE PRETTY!" said the elf scout, eager to get out of the situation as quickly as she could.

"LIAR!" said Rakar, drawing a dagger and plunging it into the elf's bosom.

The elf gasped for breath and collapsed to the ground, choking on blood.

"Thoughtless, mewling QUIM!" shouted Rakar. "You DARE try to flatter ME? I AM KING! You are nothing but an elf, unfit to lick your own blood from off my boots! Come to think of it... you won't be doing much licking any time soon! GUARDS!"

The guards didn't enter even when called, not wanting to disturb their ruler or risk breaking a rule and losing their internal organs. Instead, they waited for the elf to crawl her way out of the palace, prodded by Rakar kicking her a whole bunch, before grabbing her and hoisting her up to a standing position.

"TAKE HER TO THE TONGUE PUNISHMENT ROOM!" said Rakar. "SHOW HER WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU LIE TO THE KING!"

The guards quickly marched off, dragging the elf with them. The Dark Elves didn't actually HAVE a Tongue Punishment Room, but they found it was better to entertain their king, lest the mad "guard dog" with the messed-up face go after him. Besides, if they weren't even allowed to see the king, and could only theorize as to how magnificent he looked, they had no chance begging for their lives if they were to offend him by not following orders immediately. Even if those orders couldn't be done yet.