"Nrghhlerhrmmmpoopydiaper..."
Deadpool mumbled as his flesh began to knit back together and consciousness returned to him. His body was broken all to bits but healing up quickly as his latent mutant abilities began to kick in. His dibs had back fired and he had been met with a magic train from pain station. Wade blinked open his eyes to see a pair of beautiful blue eyes looking down at him. His right hand began to twitch and slowly raise to her face. His voice, a grunting whisper given that windpipe was still crushed, murmured to her.
"P-please... I...I have to tell you something."
She leaned in and he whispered into her ear as his body finished healing.
"Respawn lol."
With that Deadpool sat up casually and brushed some of the sand and soot off himself from the explosion. He noticed that his femur on his right leg was jutting out of his thigh and he frowned.
"Well you won't be able to stand like that." "You're mom won't be able to stand like that."
Deadpool chuckled at red brain's comeback as he reached down as pushed in the bone back into his thigh where it reconnected with the rest of the bone and healed up instantly. She shook like a dog getting out of the water as the last waves of pain left him.
"Well that was more fun than getting drunk on eggnog at your grandmoms house on Christmas and riding her wheelchair around."
Wade said as he got to his feet. He turned and looked at the young pretty native girl who was still on her knees, looking up at him like she'd seen a ghost.
"She was trying to help us?""Nice kid."
Deadpool bowed graciously to her like an old world prince and offered her his hand to help her stand.
"Milady, I am most gracious for your attempts at salvation but alas! I am Deadpool, the most deadpooliest of all the variants, I am the Merc with a Mouth, the ass grabbin assassin, the diamond wing wearin, kiss stealin, WHOO, wealin dealin, limosine ridin, jet flyin SON OF A GUN WHOOO!!"
Towards the end of that little rant Deadpool began to act like wrestling hall of famer Ric Flair, even going so far as to start doing the vintage Ric Flair strut. Before he teleported behind Indiana Jones, standing shoulder to shoulder with the guy he eyed the others in the group.
"What'day say Indi? Think one of these clowns has the Crystal Skull? My wager is on the big guy."
In the next instant Deadpool was standing toe to toe with Lobo, staring up at the monstrous space bounty hunter with his chest puffed out.
"That's right Big Show, I'm talking to you! You think you can interrupt my match and cost me the World Heavyweight championship?! HUH?!"
One final teleportation and Deadpool was once again behind the japanese woman who crushed him minutes ago. He leaned in close, as seductive as a truck stop drunk.
"You rocked my world baby but I got some bad news. I'm pregnant, it's yours and before you ask, YES I'm keeping it!"
Turning back to the group who was all staring at him Deadpool paused. He scratched his right butt cheek as he remembered that he was in a strange desert he didn't recognize.
"Does anyone know where we're at? I'm starving..."