Carson didn't flinch when Colette stepped close to him and grazed her fingertips across his face. The ice had numbed the area down so it left more of a tingling sensation than any pain, but he was still glad when the touch only lasted a few seconds. He didn't want any attention drawn to his injury for a number of reasons. One, he was sort of embarrassed that he had let Owen "win" the fight. It was the best way that he could have reacted, since an all-out brawl probably would have left both of them in the hospital, gotten them kicked out of the club, landed them on the front of several tabloids, and definitely ruined his friendship with not only Owen, but Tinashé and maybe even Ari and Colette as well. He had been the bigger person by not swinging back at Owen. Two, and in line with the first, he didn't want anyone to think that Owen's punch had actually hurt. It had and still was hurting him, but when it came to his pride, he wanted to downplay how hard the hit had actually been, even if the mark it left made it hard to do so. Three, he deserved the hit. Even if it was a sucker punch and the most pathetic way to hit someone, Carson deserved a punch to the face like that for sleeping with Alexandra. Lastly, he didn't want Shay to somehow think that this was her fault and that she could have prevented the fight from happening. He was the one left with the physical injury, but he deserved that. She didn't deserve the verbal assault Owen had slandered her with.
The guilt of putting Shay into that situation to begin with left him wanting Colette to stay. She was her normal smart ass self, and he had to smile at at least one person being normal tonight, but he didn't want to be left alone with Shay now. He didn't want to have to deal with how his relationship with Owen was probably now nonexistent, and how he had probably ruined Owen's with Shay and Alexandra too. He couldn't even begin to think of the indirect relationships he had ruined - his with Aimee, Pierce and Kris, maybe Oliver's with Owen and his family too, depending on how Pierce and Aimee reacted if they found out, his parents' relationships with them... It was too much.
When the door closed behind Colette, he set the plate of pizza down and reluctantly glanced over at Shay. What could he possibly say to make this right? To erase what had happened only an hour before? There was nothing he could say, and luckily, she spoke before he had to over think any further. When she asserted that all of this wasn't his fault, he wanted to jump in and correct her that all of it was completely his fault, but her small, soft hand reached out to his and without thinking, he took it and gently squeezed. It distracted him enough to let her get up to referencing their kiss before he jumped in. "I never should have slept with Lex, trust me Shay, I know that. I was looking at her tonight and I don't know how the fuck that happened. I wish I remembered a second of it just to have some explanation for how I could have let myself do something so... disgusting, but I don't. I don't even give a fuck that he punched me. I get that what I did was messed up regardless of how it happened, but he went apeshit on you when none of that was your fault! Yeah, you kissed me back I guess..." That had him blushing just as much as her as a smile interrupted his response for a quick second, "but I never should have kissed you there in the first place. I could have waited. I waited all night yesterday and all dinner. Hell, I had been wanting to kiss you for two years and I had to choose to do it there?! I don't want you to take any of the blame for it. He's crazy, but he's crazy protective. Owen's a good brother, really, and I don't want me being stupid to ruin your relationship with him." He squeezed her hand again. "And, you know, I like you a lot. I don't know if that's weird for me to say since I've known you for so long, or if this puts me back into the messed up place that I got myself into for what I did with Lex, but... I don't know... I feel like the way I feel with you is different than what I've ever felt with other girls..." He rubbed the back of his neck anxiously. This was already sounding so cliche and cheesy and he wanted to punch himself in the face as he replayed his own words. "But I don't want it to mess up your relationship with your family, okay? If that's what it's going to be like, where he wants you to choose me or him, then choose your family, Shay, okay?" He wanted to be okay with what he was pleading her to do, but after only being reunited with her for two days, he couldn't imagine just cutting off contact with her again. No more 3 AM Facetimes, no more embarrassing snapchats screenshotted for blackmail, no more watching movies or bowling, no more seeing her face...