The Farm- IC

After the events of ‘Love Boat’ and ‘Recording’” 14

Kiera was nearly finished licking her wounds from the disastrous events of Mission Impossible when her pity party for one was interrupted. Hoppy returned to Haven in critical condition and from what Kiera could gather, she had been shot while she and Laney were attempting to rescue three survivors from a ferry that had recently become stranded. This occurring so soon on the heels of Monroe and Toby’s deaths was yet another tragedy that the members of Haven would have to deal with. While Kiera couldn’t say she knew the red-haired young woman very well, she still felt concern for a fellow resident and scav.

In an attempt to kill time as the capable doctor worked her magic, Kiera found herself wandering the farmhouse, eventually ending up just outside the kitchen. Upon sticking her head in, she immediately spotted an unfamiliar man sitting at one of the tables, his head bowed as if meditating or deep in thought. Kiera’s interest was piqued; she wondered if he was one of the ferry survivors, he would likely have a very interesting story to tell. But she ultimately decided against disturbing him, leaving him to his thoughts as she wandered back to the triage room the doctor had set up.

"You know, when those brothers had me, I thought about giving up."

Kiera immediately recognized the voice that floated out into the hall. She also felt trapped, the conversation that was occurring was obviously private and she knew it was rude to eavesdrop on such a sensitive event, but her curiosity kept her firmly rooted outside the door. Some of what the pair spoke about seemed to be their shared mission experiences and the traumatic events that changed them. It put several of Kiera’s previous assumptions in a new light and it also illustrated the progression of their mindsets to that of realists. Kiera was very glad that there was no one to witness her blatant eavesdropping, especially with such serious topics being discussed.

Finally her opening arrived as Ben lapsed into silence for several seconds, Kiera pretended like she had just arrived to the room as she stepped inside with a decisive stride. Sparing a polite greeting to Ben followed by a head nod, she turned her attention to Hoppy.

“Hi Hoppy. I know we don’t know each other very well, but I just wanted to come and visit you.” Kiera paused awkwardly as she scrambled for the appropriate words to use in a situation like this. “I just wanted to let you know that I think you are a very strong woman and that you will overcome this obstacle the same way you have handled every job so far.” She paused for a moment, letting her words sink in. “If you would like, I can help you dye your hair red again once you’re feeling better. I quite liked the reminder that the cheery color brought of the days where woman could dress up and enjoy a salon day.”

Kiera took a seat next to Hoppy’s bed, ready to keep the girl company as long as Hoppy wanted.

After the events of 'Love Boat' and 'Recording': 15

Fuzzy feelings more or less trailed up Hoppy's spine when she heard Ben's admission. He preferred her along, over Tilo? The injured girl shrugged - it made sense, she supposed. In top form, she was fast, and could swing the cleaver better than anyone else. And she'd be the last person to hesitate when it came down to it. When it was kill or be killed. Maybe they could even shoulder that burden in the future, the burden of killing. For everyone.

It'd only be temporary though, Hoppy thought. Everyone'd have to kill eventually. So maybe it would be better to just let them get to it when the time came, with no babysitting. She felt like she should be feeling some sort of quandary, but really. This new world has no time for that.

Survival is everything.

Ben turned his head to face Hoppy. "You know the good thing about all of this?"

"Hm?" She was curious. Was there really a good thing to being shot in the chest?

"People can stop feeling sorry for me now, and start feeling sorry for you."

How was that a good thing? Brow furrowed, Hoppy felt like standing up, and fuck any dizziness or pain that may come with it. Being pitied? Having people sorry for her? Damn it to hell! She didn't want to be some invalid for weeks and weeks with people pitying her the entire time! Looking cross, she grunted and tried to get up from the bed - a look of alarm crossed Ben's face and he gently pushed her back into a laying position.

'"Dun' need bein' felt sorry for." Hoppy whined pathetically, feeling another chill pass over her.

That was when someone - Kiera? Was that her name? Had Hoppy ever spoken to her before? - walked din, nodding slightly at Ben.

Hoppy lay there, listening to the awkward greeting as the woman gave her word of encouragement, and even made an offer to help dye her hair back to the vibrant red it once was. Hoppy shot Ben a significant glance - last time she bothered to worry about dye, it got Ben captured, didn't it? Kiera was simply trying to be kind, though, she couldn't know.

"Aye-uh." Hoppy said amicably enough, having calmed down from her little twinge of annoyance. ""Kie'a Kee'a. Kay-a." Oddly enough, Hoppy giggled and then winced in pain as she realized that she couldn't really say 'Kiera' with her accent. "Me bad, uh, yew." She said at last, sheepishly.

"An' the dye, uh." She thought, breathing hard. "If'n it 'elps wit' morale, or summat. There's no more dye 'round 'here now, an' I dun' want yew t'risk youer life on a detour." She looked troubled, anxious as she said this. Especially with Ben in the room.

"Ta, fer the visit."

After the events of 'Love Boat' and 'Recording': 16

Ben's eyes turned up towards the door as Kiera entered, and he went silent, allowing the girl to speak. Once she'd moved over to sit down next to the bed, Ben furrowed his brows and ran his hand through his hair; he really needed a haircut right about now.

After a minute or two, he stood up and put his hand on Hoppy's shoulder, "Relax. It was a joke." He gave her a faint smile, before he began to step out of the room.

Then, he stopped himself, turning around to look at Kiera, "Don't let her get up. She seems to think that she can."

And then he was out the door.

Later...

Ben stood in the bathroom, staring at his own reflection in the mirror. A pair of scissors were on the counter, but he hadn't used them yet. As he stared, he shook his head, and then lowered his head to look down into the sink.

Should he have told her?

Hoppy probably wasn't going to make it. Not without his help. Richard would just have to wait, at least for now.

He had taken the list of what Short would need to help Hoppy. The only other person that he knew of that had seen it was Tilo. But didn't know what any of this stuff was. Antibiotics, but that didn't help a lot, since he didn't know where the hell he was going to get the antibiotics once he was inside Westmorland.

Maybe that other girl, Kiera, would know where to find what they needed. She certainly could use the experience.

He'd have to go talk to her and convince her to come along.

But first...

Ben picked up the scissors and began cutting.

After the events of ‘Love Boat’ and ‘Recording’ 17

'Ben!'

Laney had entered the room they'd fallen into sharing, on and off, just as Ben was struggling back into his shirt, and she'd cried out in amused surprise, her hand over her mouth. She continued to stare, taking in his new look, and leaning from side to side to get a new angle. Ben inadvertently helped by ducking his head to avoid her gaze, a habit that previously would have dropped long, dark wisps of hair over his eyes. Instead, the low orange light from the lamp shone on the contours of his skull beneath his new cut.

'What have you done,' she teased, stepping to him to help button his shirt. Funny how the loss of one finger seemed to have wholly unbalanced that hand. 'How are your -' she'd been about to say 'cuts', but knew how frustrated Ben could still get at people making a fuss off the injuries he'd received in captivity, and settled lamely for '- bandages?'

'Yeah, they're good,' he replied. 'Short changed them a couple of hours back.'

She met his eyes, and reached up to run a hand across the close-cropped hair on his scalp. 'You feel like a toothbrush, you idiot.'

He grinned shyly, revealing a flash of the old Ben, and Laney stroked his cheek. The butchering of his unkempt locks looked to have shorn away his soft edges, leaving him looking harder, more resolute, more efficient, but that awkward smile told Laney what lay beneath Ben's new exterior, and she felt relief akin to the moment he'd returned to Haven. By the back of his neck, she pulled his lips down onto hers, and returned to his shirt buttons, reversing her previous work.

---------

Afterwards, her head leaning on his chest, she asked: 'So you're going out again tomorrow?' Somehow, the thought filled her with more dread than it ever had before.

'We've got to get medicine for Hoppy. And... chest splints or something. Short gave me a list. A long list.'

More than anything, Laney wanted her diminutive friend to survive her wounds. She just hated the thought of Ben being at risk again, of putting herself at risk again. Nor did she want anyone to think she was a coward, saving her own skin at Hoppy's expense.

'You should take Tilo,' she suggested, absent-mindedly bringing the hand that had been stroking his chest up to her mouth and nibbling on the knuckle of her thumb. 'He'd be good at all that science-y stuff.'

'Can't,' Ben replied, glancing over at her nervous gesture. It was the kind of thing he was beginning to pick up on. Besides, Laney felt tense against his side, whereas usually at this point she was deeply relaxed. 'Tilo's got to go to the Rands. Laney, is everything alright?'

A pause. A sigh. 'Mmmm... yeah, fine. Just thinking. Maybe Kiera then. She'd know a lot about that sort of thing too, I guess.' She knew Ben knew something was up, and she thanked him inwardly for not pushing it.

'She's pretty green, Laney,' he said, dubiously, but secretly glad he and Laney had had the identical thought. While she seemed to be keeping something to herself, they were still on the same wavelength.

'She'll be fine with you, I know it,' Laney said, suddenly content again, and squeezing him in an attempt to get even closer.

After the events of 'Scrubs' and Big Brother/Sea King Down: Part 1

'Not mine' was her gruff response to the horrified looks Callie gave her when she checked in and Gary gave her when she handed back the camera. Benson's blood was beginning to dry now, caking the collar and front of her jacket and leaving the skin of her face and neck taut and tacky. The metallic smell had turned sour, and her stomach lurched every time she forgot to breath through her mouth.

'Not mine,' she repeated to Doc Short as she cracked the door of the sick bay. Her heart sank at what she saw. Hoppy was pale, yet covered in sweat. The normally reserved doctor looked panicky. Bloodied bandages were scattered around the room.

Laney took her friend's limp hand, feeling more helpless than she'd ever done. Hoppy's pulse thundered. Night was falling and there was no sign of Ben and Kiera with the medical supplies. Considering how far they had to go, and what they were likely to face, it would be an achievement in itself for them to make it back alive, let alone with the medicine and equipment to save Hoppy.

Hoppy was dead, she was sure of it. As dead as Benson was the moment the unseen hunter's bullet had torn through his face. Laney began to tremble as she thought of the precarious situation she'd found herself in with the sullen teenager. He'd seen her as less than human, something that did not matter. She was becoming hardened to the presence of zombies that acted in that manner, but the thought that other humans could see her like that was chilling.

And yet she found no comfort in revelling in her tormenter's death, the split-second transformation from monsterous leer to bloodied, shredded meat. Even as the thought flashed across her mind, she was gripped by the fear that that kind of thinking could sever Hoppy's tentative grip on life. Her stomach lurched at the idea.

'You can't be in here like that,' Doc Short spoke softly. 'Infection.'

In the bathroom, Laney peeled off her bloodied clothes, washed the blood from her skin. The cold water shocked and revived her; she drew in a deep breath. She had to push it down. How could she think of Benson - of herself - when she should be with Hoppy. She might never get another chance. How could she be this self-absorbed?

She heard a commotion downstairs, and Ben's voice, out of breath. Her heart beat faster as she rushed downstairs. He, at least, had made it. Had been able to do enough to save Hoppy?

'Out, out!' Doc Short cried as Laney pushed at the sickbay door. 'Working.' Painfully shy in most situations, the doctor could be the most assertive person in Haven when it came to medical matters.

Laney found Ben slumped at the dining room table. She stole up behind him, slid her arms around him, and kissed his cheek.

'You made it,' she stated, giving him a congratulatory squeeze. 'Did you get the medicine? Is Hoppy going to be okay?'

After the events of 'Scrubs' and 'Big Brother'/'Sea King Down': 2

Ben was exhausted. His legs ached. His sides ached. His chest ached. His head ached. He tried to focus on something other than the pain, but there was nothing that he could focus on that was much better.

Hoppy? She might not even make it.

The woman that he'd hit? If she survived - and by Jay's assessment, she would - then she might well be crippled for the rest of her life.

Jay? Kiera? Something had happened in that hospital between them that they weren't telling him about.

Everything seemed dire, so he had no choice but to focus on the physical pain in his body. At least that would go away faster than the mental wounds that would be incurred if Hoppy died.

Arms soon found themselves around Ben as he sat. He looked down and recognized the hands that were resting at the middle of his chest. Reaching up with one hand, he took one of Laney's hands in his own and gave it a squeeze.

"Yeah, as much as I could. The other supplies too," he replied quietly, still holding her hand in his. Gently, he rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb, staring down at their hands, "I... I don't know." Then he went quiet.

"Ben?" Laney leaned forward too look at him better, "What's wrong?"

He kept his head down and kept quiet. Where to begin? Did he tell her about the kiss? Or the woman that he'd hit? His concern for Hoppy? The threat of Richard?

"Okay." She began to pull her hand free, not in the mood to do this with Ben right now.

"Wait," Ben spoke up, squeezing her hand tighter. She stopped. Despite the protests of his muscles, he stood up and faced her. "I just wasn't sure where to start."

Briefly, he glanced towards the door where Doc Short and Hoppy were, "We did all we could. I hope it's enough..."

There was another moment of silence, and it looked like Laney might try and leave again, "I hit a woman on the way over."

"What?"

"I looked away for a second. When I looked back, she was in front of me. I thought it was one of those things. I tried to avoid her, but I clipped her." He shrugged, sighing. "I only found out it was a living person on the way back."

"Did she die?" Laney asked.

"No. Kiera and a paramedic we met in the hospital are helping her here. The paramedic says she should survive, but her leg..." Ben shook his head.

Why he'd started with that, he didn't know. He just wanted to get something off his chest.

After the events of 'Scrubs' and 'Big Brother'/'Sea King Down': 3

Laney reached out and touched his chest, and opened her mouth to speak, when Kiera and a man in hospital scrubs struggled through the door, bearing a woman who was white with pain. Face full of concern - possibly even guilt, Laney mused - Ben rushed over to help them get the woman into Doc Short's sick bay.

'Can we go somewhere else?' he asked hesitently on his return.

Laney observed the hunch of his shoulders as they climbed the farmhouse stairs. Ben sat on the bed she was beginning to think of as 'theirs', and rubbed his face with both hands, sighing deeply.

'Ben, it wasn't your fault. Just one of those things.' He looked up at her expectantly, and Laney was touched by his need to always do the right thing. It was going to cause him great pain, one of these days. There just wasn't a 'right thing' any more. 'You probably saved her life in more way than one, bringing her here.'

Ben's look of relief lasted about 10 seconds. He nodded, and it was gone.

"That's not all, is it?"

He was silent for a moment. After a brief conflict, he seemed to come to a conclusion, and shook his head.

"Things seem to spread quickly around here, so I think I should tell you before you hear it from anybody else and before it gets out of hand." A pause. Laney sat on the bed next to him. He shifted uncomfortably. Guiltily, Laney wondered

"Kiera kissed me. It didn't get any further than that, and I didn't kiss her back." He didn't want to say that he pulled away because he heard a noise, but he liked to think that he would have pulled away from her anyway. Laney was... well, he hadn't felt about someone else quite like he did for her, and he felt it wasn't just because of the world they were in now. He didn't want to lose her, and if he did, he didn't want it to be over something as stupid as that.

Beside him, Laney was silent. Her head throbbed and a lump formed in her throat as she tried to process this news. The distaste she'd developed for Kiera on their ridiculous failure of a mission deepened. Not only was the American girl detached from reality, Laney realised, she seemingly had no qualms about disrupting other people's lives to get what she wanted.

'Laney?'

She drew a deep breath. 'And you didn't kiss her back?'

'No.'

'Then so what?' She took his face tenderly in both hands and drew his lips onto hers.

Ben tried to hide his surprise at her reaction, but his eyebrows raised as he broke their kiss. His surprise was soon replaced with relief, and he leaned his head down to rest it against hers affectionately.

His concern over Hoppy and the woman he had hit hadn't subsided much yet, but his concern over the kiss was now gone. The other ones could wait, he told himself. At least he could find some comfort with the former pop star.

After the events of 'Scrubs' and 'Big Brother'/'Sea King Down': 4

"Look, Ben," Laney continued, stroking his hand, "In my old world, the only reason for kissing anyone was to get in the gossip pages. So it became, I don't know, like a handshake or something. So the way I see it, that's all that happened with Kiera."

"Uh-huh," Ben nodded, bemused by her reaction, and by how unfamiliar all of that seemed to him. Back where he came from, there would have been a lot of drama regarding the situation, even if it had been exactly the same. He was thankful that Laney wasn't starting anything like that.

"I know she musta felt like a little bit of home, with her accent and everything. But I'm your home now. And kissing you doesn't feel like a handshake."

Ben took in what she was saying. This was more than just a physical relationship for her. That's what she was saying, or at least that's what he gathered from her words.

He lowered his head slightly, smiling, "I'm... I'm glad that you're not angry at me," he admitted, "I'd hate to lose you over something dumb like this."

There was a lull in the conversation, "How awkward would it have been with you around if we..." Ben paused, considering how to put it, "...stopped whatever it is this is?" he chuckled a little nervously, wanting to change the subject a little. He didn't really want to talk about the encounter he had with Kiera. Not with Laney, anyway.

"What happens if Hop--" Ben started, but Laney interrupted him before he could finish.

"No. You did everything that you could, and got what she needed. Now Short is gonna do everything she can for her. We'll see her soon."

Laney herself was worried, but she had to do all she could to avoid thinking about the worst case scenario. The least she could do was try and help Ben do the same.

Ben nodded, pursing his lips together in a straight line, "You're right."

Then Laney redirected the conversation back to them. "I'd hate to lose you too," she said quietly. There was another moment of silence as Laney closed her eyes, steeling herself, "I think I might be pregnant."

At that admission, Ben's heart jumped. It wasn't entirely unexpected, but he'd done everything within his power so far to avoid talking about it, and he realized then that she might have been doing the same thing.

And he was scared.

He was scared that if she was pregnant, she would be all that much more vulnerable. He was scared that if she was pregnant, she might not survive the birth, if she even made it that far. He was scared that if they had a baby, he wouldn't be able to do enough to take care of the child.

There was too much to be scared of at this possibility. All of these scenarios had run through his head probably hundreds of times already, and now all of these thoughts, all of these worries had crashed down on top of him as soon as she uttered the words 'I think I might be pregnant.'

Ben made no effort to conceal what he was feeling, and he stood up slowly without a word. Laney stayed where she was.

Finally, Ben turned around, "I was worried about the... possibility. I've been bombarded left and right. I found a test in Cromwell, and I found some vitamins in Kendal." He figured it was probably too late to mention the condoms, if she was pregnant, and he didn't want to bring up the morning-after pills either. Honestly, he wasn't sure if they would even work anymore.

Then, he stepped back to the bed and brought her to her feet and held her close, "No matter what, Laney, I'm with you. Whatever happens, whatever you decide, I'm with you." He didn't even know if she wanted it, if she was pregnant. Either way, it would be her choice, and he would be there for her, no matter her decision.

After the events of 'Scrubs' and 'Big Brother/Sea King Down': 5

She'd blurted it out; there had been no other way. Laney briefly wondered what the convention had been for revealing this kind of news back in the old world. Probably depended on the circumstances as much back then. It didn't matter now. Now it was out there, there was no taking it back. She nibbled on her thumb nervously as Ben struggled to take in her news.

He gaped. He stared at her. He frowned at the floor. Laney's heart was in her mouth. Was he going to be angry? Cry? Be happy - unlikely. He stood and slowly walked to the opposite wall. He put his hands on his hips and blew out heavily. Finally he turned around and spoke, haltingly.

'I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry,' Laney whispered frantically, every muscle in her body tensing. Then he stepped to her, held her close, and said all the right things, and a dam burst within Laney. She buried her face in Ben's chest and let fall tears of relief. Relief at sharing the fear that had grown inside her over the last week. Relief that, regardless of the outcome, Ben was the man she thought he was. And she fought down a chasm-like panic at the thought that, just hours earler, Benson's savage attack could have ended all that.

Then something occurred to her. She drew a deep breath, wiped her cheeks, and looked up into her lover's face. 'You found a... test?'

'Yeah,' he replied. 'A pregnancy test.'

'A pregnancy test?' Laney queried, incredulously.

'Yeah, a pregnancy test,' he repeated, a little defensively, thrown by Laney's sudden mood swing.

'What are you doing with a pregnancy test?' A smile was beginning to play across her lips.

'I... I just thought it would be useful.'

Laney lowered her head to his chest again. Concern knitted Ben's brow as her shoulders began shaking, and he wrapped his arms around her again, holding her tight, whispering tenderly in her ear: 'It's going to be okay, Laney, it'll be alright.'

She pulled back from him. There were tears in her eyes, true, but they didn't fit with the wide grin spread across her face. Laney's lip quivered as she tried to contain the fit of giggles.

'A test... useful...' she gasped, her chest heaving. The idea of anyone, let alone a man Ben's age - barely more than a boy in the old world - stockpiling pregnancy tests struck Laney as the strangest, most out-of place thing she'd heard since the world fell apart. She caught her breath then, looking up at Ben's confusion, burst out laughing again, squeezing him tightly. She could feel herself becoming slightly hysterical, and feeling his lean strength calmed her slightly. Ben patted her back vaguely, feeling helpless in this onslaught of contradicting emotions.

It took several minutes for Laney's rollercoaster to subside.

'Ben, I love you, but you're so weird. Alright, let's have this test.'

After the events of 'Scrubs' and 'Big Brother/Sea King Down': 6

In mere seconds, Laney had completely disarmed him. Her giggles. There was a point that he just leaned his head back and looked at her with a furrowed brow. It was all he could do to keep himself from laughing along with her, even though he really had no idea what she was laughing about. He patted her back stiffly, still not entirely sure how he was supposed to be reacting right now.

And then...

He only heard the very first part of her next sentence. His head began to swim, as the words echoed through his head again; over and over.

'Ben, I love you...'

That was all he heard. After that, his brain seemed to stop - only momentarily, but it was long enough that he didn't catch anything else she might have said.

Truth be told, he had thought about telling her that same thing. He had almost confessed how he felt about her to Hoppy the day before. But, stupidly, he was worried about getting ahead of himself and scaring her away. It was an old world worry, probably. She wasn't going anywhere. He wasn't going anywhere. Not unless either of them were killed.

Apparently he'd been silent longer than he'd realized. Laney was now looking up at him, an eyebrow raised.

"Ben?"

"Huh?" Ben replied, a little dumbfounded, and seeming like he had just been woken up from a heavy sleep.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah, just..." There was a long pause, "...what did you say?"

"Get the test?"

Well, at least he knew now what she'd said. "Not that."

"You're weird?" There was a rising inflection at the end of her sentences. She was pretty sure what he meant, but...

"Not that either," Ben shook his head, a smile growing on his face now.

Laney paused a while, bringing her head back down to rest it against his chest. "I love you," she managed to say, finally.

Ben's smile only grew larger. It was probably the biggest smile he'd had in a long time. Maybe even the biggest since before everything went to shit.

"I love you too, Laney."

After the events of 'Scrubs' and 'Big Brother/Sea King Down': 7

After their argument, after the sudden change of mood, Laney was in foul humour when she went looking for Kiera. Ben had wanted her to take the test straight away but Laney, after reading the instruction leaflet, had insisted on waiting a couple of days. The later you were, the more accurate it was, she reasoned. Besides - and this was something she'd kept from Ben as she scowled at him - if she was pregnant, not knowing for one or two more days was a brief respite. She'd laid her old life to rest, and was beginning to find self-worth in her role as a Scav; being consigned to Haven and caring for herself and an unborn child meant the end of her contribution to the survival of what was now her home.

So she thumped Kiera's door a little harder than necessary, the temper she'd vowed to keep when confronting the American girl threatening to boil over already. Even so, it was a while until the door opened a crack, revealing one of Kiera's bleary eyes. Not pausing to wonder why she was asleep already, Laney pushed the door wider and leant on the jamb.

'Girl, we need to talk.'

Kiera blinked twice, and her eyes slowly focused.

'Don't come to me like that,' Laney said sharply. 'You got something to say to me?'

Kiera shook her head slowly, peering quizzically out from under heavy lashes. Laney breathed out heavily. The girl's refusal to engage with her was infuriating.

'I'm not playing this game. You kissed Ben.'

A look of recognition snapped across Kiera's face, and her brow creased. Her lip trembled a little; in fact, she looked hurt. Laney stared at her defiantly.

Finally Kiera responded: 'Oh, you mean when Ben kissed me?'

This time it was Laney's turn to be silent. Perhaps she'd been naive in expecting the American girl to simply crumble and apologise. Perhaps she was going to have to fight for Ben.

But then Laney rallied. She wasn't going to doubt what had happened between her and Ben, especially over the word of someone who'd thought they could have walked to Edinburgh. It occurred to Laney, perhaps Kiera wasn't all there. She wouldn't be the first person damaged mentally by the end of the world. With society so disodered, maybe she just had no sense of boundaries any more. That was no reason, though, to go easier on her, Laney reasoned as she glowered back at Kiera's inplaccable expression. In fact, she should probably keep her guard up around the American girl.

Narrowing her eyes, she leant forward. Used to being a couple of inches taller than most women, Laney found her temper frayed even further by the fact that Kiera matched her for height. Nonetheless, she was confident she would come out on top if it came to a fight. Her muscles tensed involuntarily and her pulse quickened.

'Ben is mine,' she muttered between clenched teeth. 'I don't blame you, having a go, but he is mine.'

Kiera was fighting to stay mentally present; her thoughts crawled by as Laney stared her down.

Somewhere inside Kiera felt angry and hurt, but for now those emotions were smothered and locked away. She actually felt like hugging Laney and petting the woman’s hair while telling her everything would be alright, though common sense ultimately dissuaded her.

'I don’t blame you for wanting to think the best of Ben and the worst of me,' she replied eventually. 'Trust is a terrible thing to lose. Anyone would cling it, no matter what the truth might actually be. I would draw my own conclusions before relying on blind faith.' Kiera watched with a neutral expression as Laney took in her words. The American's detatched monotone enraged her. She clenched a fist as if to strike her, then redirected her anger.

'Ya think? Well listen, Skimmed Milk. He is giving it to this' - she gestured to herself, from head to toe and back, tossing her hair - 'two times a night. He does not need' - she pushed a sharp finger into Kiera's sternum - 'this.' She pursed her lips and raised an eyebrow at Kiera. 'You get me?'

Laney turned on her heel, flicked her hair once more, and strutted away, adreneline coursing through her veins.

Ben looked up sullenly when she skipped back into their room. She fixed him with a wicked grin and straddled him, kissed him passionately and whispered: 'Sorry I'm such a moody cow.' Ben's resentment at their argument ebbed away.

Moments later, Laney yelped and swore as Ben peeled her tight jeans down her legs, ripping off the scab and dried blood from the shrapnel wound she'd suffered at the helicoptor crash site; she'd forgotten about it until now.

'Woah, woah, what happened?' cried Ben, springing back. 'Did you get that out on your mission?'

Images of Benson's leering, panting face closed in on Laney. Somehow he was dripping in the blood she knew an unseen marksman would soon spill. She covered her eyes to shut him out, to no avail; Benson loomed closer, blood rimming his teeth and gums. Laney buried her head in her arms, whispering 'No, no, no'. He was mumbling, mocking, indistinguishable. Flecks of bloodly spittle from Benson's heavy breathing splattered her cheeks. She was trembling, her heart felt like it would burst out of her chest.

Beside her, a voice gradually filtered through the static of her panic attack. It couldn't be Benson, she reasoned. The accent was different, the pitch was different. It was soft, almost pleading, rather than sneering and brutal.

'Laney, what the hell happened? Who did this to you?' Ben sat close, but wisely not close enough to crowd her. Concern filled his eyes; there was a glint, too, of the rage he'd struggled with in recent times.

She covered herself with a blanket. Damn, it was cold.

'I just need to sleep, Ben, I'm exhausted. Can you be close but not too close? Sorry.'

After the events of 'Welcome Party: 1

"Uh. Uhm." Hoppy looked back and forth. Really, this whole thing was a little silly, wasn't it? Shinji didn't even know english, and yet she was relying on him to more or less place all the decorations. Hoppy, of course, had it all written up, in big bright colorful words, Welcome back, Scavengers!, with cliche'd happy faces all over the place. Ultimately very childish, but since, from the new guy, anyways, it was more or less confirmed that Tilo was dead, maybe some sort of... mood lifter was in order. And Hoppy still stubbornly held onto the belief that Tilo somehow made it. They needed the old guy, damnit. So, Hoppy more or less bossed Shinji around as she directed him to place the banners - hell knew she couldn't do it, confined to the wheelchair and all for now - but really, it was stupid. And more and more, Hoppy was wondering if this was even a good idea. Would Ben, Laney, Kiera, would any of them really in the mood for anything of the sort?

Damn Hoppy and her impulses. But the sugary scent of the newly steamed flan couldn't just go to waste, though. At the very least, some sweets would help, right? And, if Hoppy didn't say so herself, she thought the flan was rather well made, from what she could tell. The mound-shaped sweet was large enough to fit for all three to eat - with some extra for anyone else who wanted to eat.

"Aye." Hoppy murmured, seeing that the last banner was more or less even on both sides. Shinji shot her a quizzical look - why couldn't he be some englishman, for god's sake. She shot him a thumbs up and a smile, and the Japanese man understood, and got down from the stool, looking a little pleased of himself. Hoppy was glad to be giving him things to do at least - help him get his mind off of what happened in the boat. And hell, Shinji was a nice guy. A good guy. She liked him.

She felt like shit that he had to kill Kaiko with his own hands - if she hadn't been stupid enough to get shot, she coulda done it for him. She should have. But there was no real way to convey that regret to him, so she just smiled.

"Arigatou, Shinji."

All there was really to do now was wait, more or less, for the others to arrive. Hopefully with good news, because if it turned out Tilo was dead, this would become incredibly pointless and awkward.

After the events of 'A King Among Men': 1

Callie was siting silently, head bowed, at the Command Centre table when Laney entered to brief her on the day's events. She'd obviously watched them aproaching Haven; their numbers told its own story. She raised her eyes, and Laney held her gaze as she shook her head. Callie lowered her head again and her pain brought home to Laney the loss they'd all suffered; the third in little more than a week.

'Anything else?' Callie asked eventually, voice thickened with grief, her eyes brimming with tears for Tilo. Laney suddenly found herself unable to speak for the lump in her throat.

'We burned it,' Ben said behind her, squeezing her shoulder. 'To the ground.'

'But...' Callie looked up again, shocked at the callous description of such destruction.

'We had to. There were hundreds of them in there. If they'd wandered up to Haven...'

Callie simply nodded, lapsing into silence again.

Ben propelled Laney away by the shoulder, and she slipped in under his arm, pressing her body against his. 'Come on, I've got to show you something,' he said.

They hesitated at Tilo's door. The memories bound to items within were bound to deepen their grief. Despite feeling like her heart had sunken into her stomach with grif, Laney steeled herself as Ben pushed open the door. Tilo's sparse possessions were tucked away neatly in the small room, and by the bed was a neat stack of books he'd scavanged during his short stay at Haven. The variety of titles spoke partly to the fractured nature of society, but also to Tilo's voracious intellect. Among the pile were A Tale of Two Cities, a biography of William Gladstone, a local history of the Lake District, The Sea The Sea by Iris Murdoch and a medical textbook about amputations.

Laney's ruminations on the qualities they'd lost with Tilo - not just his kindness and bravery, but his love of knowledge, his connection to the old world - were interrupted when Ben swept aside the stack of books and pulled out from under the bed, with a hollow wooden 'clonggg' as it bumped a leg of the bed, the most beautiful thing Laney had seen in months. Her hand flew to her mouth and her eyes widened as a sob burst involuntarily from her.

Ben held it out to her, frozen to the spot though she was. 'Tilo grabbed it in Cromwell. He - he remembered you wanted one. He was waiting til...' He faltered, momentarily jealous that it was Tilo who had provoked this reaction in Laney. Then he pushed the ugly thought aside and instead appreciated his fallen friend's generosity of spirit.

Emotions, hopes and memories she hadn't felt in months sprang up in Laney: part of her she thought had died with the old world came back to life as she reached out and cradled the guitar like a child.

'Thank you,' she whispered.