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Sadie Blarke

"There is no such thing as a cure, there is only a point where you learn to keep your pretty little mouth shut."

0 · 290 views · located in St. Joans Medical institute

a character in “Dead Poets society”, as played by OurLadyofSorrows

Description

Name: Sadie Blarke
Gender: Female
Age: 19
Reason for breakdown: There is only so much one person can take. There comes a point where everyone breaks, the end of the line, the point where hope is shattered and scooped into a garbage bag: when you cash in what's left of your pride and give up.

It wasn't that her life was so hard, or so traumatic. Seemingly it was the little things that piled up that would prove to be the straw that broke the camel's back. Sadie was raised in a strict, upper class family. They might as well have been British, claiming the "Keep Calm and Carry On" motto as their own.

Temper tantrums? They didn't happen. Tears? Chin up, soldier, what are you crying about? Arguments didn't make it past a dirty look and a clearing of the throat. Grief was a thing you handled in private, or not at all. Mood swings were just ignored, never confronted, and usually met a closed door.

So how was she supposed to cope when her father died? Sadie panicked, in her own quiet way. Her mother didn't cry, her family withdrew, and she just fell apart. It wasn't okay to be upset, and she reached a point where the only option was suicide.

It was either death, or a life worse than death. A life that wasn't really a life at all. A full bottle of prescription painkillers chased down by liquor from her mother's wine cabinet later, she was faced with a stomach pump and a cab ride to somewhere she could "rest," as the doctors so gently put it.

Appearance: Sadie is petite at best. Puberty didn't grant her curvy hips or a full chest like it had for many other girls. It was enough for her. She has matured enough not to look like a little kid, but not enough to ever grace a playboy magazine. Standing at 5'3", she isn't the most intimidating looking person until you get her angry. Which is rare, but scary. Her eyes are deep brown, and just a touch too close together. Sadie's dark hair is short, just brushing the nape of her neck and messily hanging over her eyes in the front. Her skin is lightly tanned, not very much. Just a kiss of sun from wandering the outdoors beyond her home.
Art of Sadie
Also Sadie.

Likes: Expressing herself, the outdoors, being barefoot, physical contact with others, music, painting.
Dislikes: Any sort of solitary confinement, being held back, discussing her family, trying to discuss her feelings with any doctor, talking about her past, frigid people.
Habits: Touching people when talking to them, wandering barefoot, humming when she's nervous, walking on her tip toes, sleeping in late.

History: Sadie was born to a well-to-do family in the south. She moved shortly after she hit puberty, keeping her light accent only when she gets agitated or upset. Mocking her or mentioning it only makes it worse, much like questioning someone with a stutter. Her mother was fascinated with cocktail parties and loved to entertain, while her father hid in the study with his books and things he brought home from work. Sadie was caught between two worlds, both which required her to handle life on her own. There was no asking her mother about boys, or running to her father when she was scared.

It was always her, her and her journal. It was probably how she kept sane for so long. Up until her father died in a car accident, it was day to day. Her mother did whatever it was she did when she wasn't entertaining...usually getting ready to entertain or shopping. She would bring Sadie nice things. But shiny objects and designer clothes didn't replace a mother in any sense. Her father worked, then hid in his study, claiming more work. It really wasn't interesting or horrible. Just...blank slate. That resisted her urges to break it down.
Theme song: Faces Like Mine-Emilie Autumn

So begins...

Sadie Blarke's Story

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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Lacross lowered his head in submission, trying to tell her without words that he was not threat. That he meant no intention to harm, nor wanted to. The woman's words sent chills down his spine. It was obvious that she wanted to be left alone, but he didn't want her to be cold or get lost in this place. He thought of a compromise in his mind for this. He stopped at a distance and paced back and forth, his head down and avoiding eye contact.

"I just wanted to see if you were alright." he said in a hushed tone, hoping not to scare her. Or at least as much as his habits could allow. He was clearly animalistic in nature, and normally that put people off. Scaring them even to see him as no more then a common animal. He had never seen this woman before and didn't want her to run and get herself caught by the orderlies on his behaf. Never mind that it would be better for him to be at a distance then be close up if she were to be hostile. The gentileness of him made him come there, the curiousness of him made him pace and stay around her.

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Molly McMann Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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Time escaped her fairly easily. Sadie had slipped into another state of mind that was reminiscent of a walking coma. She spoke to noone, she hardly moved from her bed, and a few times had to be force fed. There was no explicable source of trauma. She wracked her brain, thinking back to the night of the meeting. Things faded in and out from that night. Currently, she was curled on her bed, staring at the door as if waiting for it to fly open. It just wouldn't move. She didn't keep track of time. Years could pass, but they didn't. It could have been a few hours, but it had to be more because the nurses kept trying to feed her, and one was dragging her out of bed and trying to coax her into a shower. It all seemed to be okay. She just stared at the nurse for a while, being pulled around like a rag doll on a string. It didn't matter. Not until the orderly shoved her into the bathroom and turned the water on. Sadie shrieked, as if she was just tossed into a lake full of ice and death. The shriek echoed through the hallway, and even managed to startle the poor woman that was just trying to help her. Sadie writhed like someone was trying to kill her, as if a shower was some sort of punishment. She whined and squirmed the entire time, even when a fresh set of clothes was tossed at her. Long black pajama pants, a white tank top, and a black button down top. Sadie stared at the clothing before pulling it onto her damp body. The pants stuck to her in an unpleasant fashion. The shirt felt too heavy. Everything felt wrong. The brunette murmured in disgust to herself, breaking away from the nurse. Her lower lip trembled, as if holding back a second shriek of discontent. But nothing came. Her fingers trailed against the wall, as if memorizing the hallway.

So she walked. She was so alone, yet so surrounded. Those who understood disappeared. Or maybe she just didn't look hard enough. Either way, she nearly jumped out of her skin when she was touched. Sadie felt a strong hand on her wrist, guiding her to the rec room. She moved and resisted like a stubborn child, though not a word came from her. Maybe that was what they wanted. For her to protest, to speak, to yell at them. But her eyes just softened, a sad and haunted expression coming over her as she dragged her feet behind the orderly. What was the point of structured schedules anyways? Sadie stumbled as she was pushed towards the room, not really into the idea of being pushed into a room of other people and activities. She paced the perimeter of the room, not getting terribly close to anyone. It wasn't until she heard the frantic babbling that she perked up. Molly. Not who Sadie was looking for, but close. Recognizable. Something that told her that the other night was real. She slowly made her way up behind her, not really in a mood to speak to her but to just sit nearby. Sadie perched herself on a nearby desk, her legs crossed and her hands folded in her lap. Silent as a night after a nuclear bomb. No life to be found beyond the steady rising and falling of her chest. Her eyes squinted only when she moved her head to look at Lacross. A smile would have been appropriate, but instead Sadie smacked her hand on the desk, widened her eyes and tipped her head at him. The one who didn't function like the rest. He was real, too?

"I thought day wasn't your thing." She murmured as some sort of greeting.

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Molly McMann Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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Sadie pursed her lips. She was an odd one, wasn't she? But, was that really fair to say, considering the circumstances? They thought she was crazy, too. Crazy enough to lock up. Unsure how to approach that question, the brunette shifted uncomfortably on the desk. She was sitting practically right in front of her. How did she not see? It made no logical sense. But this girl wasn't logical. Sadie had to let the thought simmer for a moment before responding. "Right here." It seemed to be the beginning of one of her short, practiced answers that she was so infamous more. But her tone was tired, defeated. "You can see me, you're just not seeing what you want to see. Look closer." That was the best she could do for the girl. She didn't know what would upset her, what made things click in her mind, how she worked. All Sadie had was a dimmed perspective on how the world worked. Practiced. Meticulous. She was breaking the mold and it was killing her.

Sadie ran her slender fingers over her face, dragging them down as if trying to take her skin off. Dark eyes scanned the other girl, searching for some sign of life. Every so often, a stray strand of hair would stick to her face, still damp from her forced shower. "Look at me." She said softly, her voice cracking ever so slightly. "Nobody ever really sees me. So don't worry if you can't. It's not your fault." It wasn't compassion or guilt that led her to explain, to keep her from snapping at Molly. Because she wasn't angry with her. She wasn't really anything. If forced to explain her feelings at that exact moment, she could only yank out the word sad. Sad like tears in a rainstorm. A whisper in a windstorm. Death during the end of the world. A sadness that was present but never really acknowledged. She thought too much.

Sadie straightened her back, folding her hands in her lap again and becoming still once more.

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Molly McMann Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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Lacross perked up at the familar voice, he looked around and soon locked his eyes on to Sadie. He seemed to wiggle a bit like an excited puppy as he bounded toward her and paced quickly around her. It wasn't that often this happy and excited side of him ever got out or was even seen at that matter, since his admittion to the asylum. All most of anyone saw was either his angered bestial side or his cold and manipulative side when his humanity returned. Right now, he was in the in-between; somewhat speaking when he wanted to, but still acting like an animal.

This in-between was what had caught the nurse's attention. She watched at Lacross nuzzled and paced around Sadie like a dog who had not seen their owner in months. She knew Lacross's reputation and had seen his simmering anger first hand. She sighed, noting it on a note pad.

"Where you? Where you?" He said, finally laying in-front of her in his normal sphinx like position. In the back of his mind though, he knew people were watching his behavior, some snickering at him and some he knew were thinking about jumping him somewhere during the day if he was forced to wander the hall. He turned to looked over at the others. Only Molly and Sadie had enough of his trust to have him feel the need to protect them. If anything, he was on edge since he didn't even sleep in his room the night before. He couldn't be sure that he would lash out at other people and in the chaos, get them caught in the crossfire.

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Molly McMann Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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Every now and again, Lacross's eyes would scan the area to give death stares at the others that locked eyes on him. Some cringed, some moved away from his field of vision, some even started to slip out of the room entirely to keep him from staring at him. Only to be pushed back in the room and cower somewhere out of his sight. However, there where some still arrogant enough to keep whispering about him. He ignored them, prefering to deal with them when the time came.

He scuttled away from Sadie for a moment, crawling under the table and grabbing papers and pencils and a small board before laying in front of Sadie again. He started to doodle a bit, small drawings of himself doing things that he normally did at home. Other drawings of him trying to catch up with a woman by the looks of it, but she had a helmet made of a moose's skull. It calmed him down somewhat here. It took his mind off the pain this place caused him in the long run. He shivered a bit from the water that fell on him, but nothing violent. Just something that set off a chill.

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Molly McMann Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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Sadie squinted her eyes at Molly. Well, at least she could see her now. Not that it made any sense, or mattered in any way. She nodded slowly, still lightly running her hand up and down the upper part of Lacross' back. A nervous habit that didn't seem to disturb him too much. She examined Molly, watching as she started talking to her. At her. In words that actually made sense. Questions. Things that Sadie really didn't want. Questions were what landed her here. She pulled her hand away from Lacross, long enough for him to wander off from her. She raised her brows, glanced at him, then turned her gaze back at Molly. It confused her when people acted out of their nature. But she didn't even have much of a personality of her own, now did she? Sadie pursed her lips once more, not really sure if she had much of an answer.

"It's fine." She answered shortly, returning her nervous hand back to touching at Lacross' back. It kept in her touch with what she was doing, where she was. The past few days had been rough. She twitched like she was nervous, like there was a reason for her anxiety. There was total reason, but she felt it was so trivial that she would be laughed at. By what? A bunch of people as broken as her? Did they care? Would they laugh because her problems were so...tiny? Sadie shrunk back, realizing how long she was taking to respond. Dark eyes were wide and locked on Molly for a moment or two. "If I was okay I wouldn't be here." There was a pause, a realization, and then she snapped her neck back, like someone had grabbed her head and thought for a moment. "I mean..." She looked at Molly again, squinting her eyes at her.

"My mother is supposed to visit." Those words were heavier than she expected them to be. To her, it was a nightmare, a punishment, her reason for hiding in her room for so many days. Avoiding the woman who judged her so harshly. Sadie turned her attention back to Lacross, nuzzling her forehead against his shoulder and watching him draw.

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Molly McMann Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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Lacross whimpered, feeling the heaviness and fear in her voice. He knew his step-mother never wanted to see her again and his real mother died of illness when he was young, but neither would go as far as to visit and cause torment to their unwanted child.

He started to draw on another piece of paper, drawing life when he was inside the 'civil home'. One small picture of him looking miserable at a dinner table wearing a suit; another picture of him trying to make his case with a woman, somewhat shorter then him who seemed to have a lump in her belly who was clearly not having any of it. The last picture was him seemingly in a padded room, possibly somewhere in the asylum, maddened, bruised and looking delirious from some kind of shot and medication.

His decent into his own personal hell so to speak. He had heard the rumors of his arrival here, knowing that he was locked away for the first month because of his temper and savagery at the time, he had been dubbed 'the beast of St.Joans' and the target of some patients jokes or out right attacks. But even hell had some light in it.

He sighed, sinking lower into the floor, waiting to be let out of recreation for a nap or food. The thought of seeking to the outside and exploring the cave the society was in to see if there was another den made him smirk a little. Some distraction was all he needed.

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Molly McMann Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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Sadie lifted her head when she heard Lacross whimper in response to her. She shook her head, quickly moving and squeezing him. "Don't." She murmured softly to him, then leaned closer to watch him draw out what looked like his past. Sadie frowned deeply, lightly tracing her fingers over the drawing. In a vague way, he had lived her live. Lost someone, only to be forced into a life that just wasn't made for him. It wasn't right. It wasn't fair. He was a unique...she wasn't sure what to call him, but she was comfortable with him. He didn't ask a lot of questions, he didn't push her to limits that she wasn't comfortable going to. He was just there. Sadie nuzzled Lacross for a moment, then slowly rose to her feet. She glanced at the nurses who watched her when she crossed the room to grab some markers and paper. Why did they stare? What were they expecting from her? Sadie scampered back down to the floor next to Lacross and sat cross legged. She pursed her lips, her hands working in a fury of speed and noises from the marker gliding across the paper.

Sketches, half finished things. Nothing was full, nothing was right. She tossed the papers on the floor from time to time, only to move onto another. It was eerie to really look at her etchings. Things didn't look right. They were reminiscent of a child's drawings, minus the innocent. So crude, and partially finished, that it was hard to decipher what was going on. Everything was done in black and grey, with just the faintest touch of deep purples. Darkness. She could never draw out her trauma. She could never speak her horrors. Even the markers seemed to slide away when she went to explain what was going on. Finally, she tossed it away from her, frustrated.

She wanted out. She needed out. What if her mother showed up? What if she saw them? The half scribbled drawings of her childhood. Always keeping the mother and her standards in the corner. Her mother and her perfect dress code and the sitting straight at the dinner table and the smiles everywhere...

Sadie cringed, flipped the papers over, and shoved them away as if they were going to harm her. "I want to go outside." She murmured softly and ran her fingers anxiously through her hair. "Or maybe just not be here." She thought of the abandoned bits of the hospital. Peace and quiet. Where her mother would never find her.

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Molly McMann Character Portrait: Svean Marcia Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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Lacross caught a glimpse of someone out in the hall as he laid low to the ground, some he had recognized from one of the meeting but had never talked to personally. The announcement of Svean's capture must have gotten to her by the look on her face. He assumed long time members of the society had a reaction to the news. He kept in mind that the first month of his residency here, he was put into solitary almost imideiently (but not before nearly mauling another inmate for getting close to him. The other was being hostile, he had no choice), and was released for reasons unknown to him. He assumed that since he was quiet for the last few days before, he should be allowed out among the general public.

He slid the paper over to his view, seeing as Sadie was frustrated with it. He tilted his head to the side. A haze on the paper, maybe reflecting her own mood, or lack there of. He left it alone, not wanting to cause anymore pain. However, the minute he laid his head on his hands to try and relax, he noticed something out of the corner of his eyes.

One of the inmates who had been calling him out was now crawling toward him. Not in the way Lacross walked, but on his hands and knees in an attempt to mimic and mock him. He didn't understand what he was talking about, something along the lines of insult and annoyance. He turned away from him in an attempt to ignore him, but just as he was about to drift off to daydream he did something that was known to set him off and all the other inmates in the room knew it.

Lacross felt a tug on the back of his hair and snapped back to humanity, but a more maddened version of it. Others in the room backed up, causing the inmate confusion before finding a hand on his throat. "What is it that you do not know about curtosy in front of a lady?" He said, malice dripping off his words. The inmate squirmed in his grip as Lacross stood, dragging him away from Sadie and Molly and out into the hallway. The nurse was visibly to afraid to do anything but watch as Lacross dragged the inmate into the hall. What sounded from there sounded like a struggle on both sides, a scream of pain on the inmate's side as a roar rang out and then a thud. Lacross came back into the door way, mouth and finger tips bloody (his nails pretty much dripping). He turned to the nurse. "He's not dead, but he'll need attention." He said calmly, walking over to the sink to wash off the blood. He made his way back over to Sadie and laid back in the position was was in earlier, knowing that he wouldn't be bothered for a while.

((Didn't mean to put svean in the characters listed. >.>' I wouldn't mind joining the boarding school one though.))

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Molly McMann Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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There was as much peace as allowed in this place, it seemed. Sadie rolled over onto her back, propping her arms behind her to lay and watch the people around her. This was partially fueled by curiosity, partially fueled by fear. It threw her off when she saw someone crawling towards them. Lacross ignored it, but Sadie sat up and scooched away. She eyed him warily, watched as he got far too close for comfort...then out of nowhere Lacross snapped into action and grabbed the other patient. This wasn't going to end well. It never ended well. Sadie clamped her hands over her face, almost afraid of the outcome. She peeked through her fingers as he dragged the other boy out to the hall, where the noises of conflict heightened to screams and growls. She winced, knowing that this wasn't going to be a smooth and happy day.

Sadie glanced up and lowered her hands when Lacross returned, bits of him dripping with blood and an anger in his voice that worried her. Even as he returned to his place by her side, she worried. She lightly nuzzled him, then slowly climbed to her feet. She was met with stares. Then again, who wasn't stared at in this place? They were surrounded by the sick, the immature, the broken, the hurt. Anywhere and everywhere inbetween. She slowly stepped towards the hallway, straining her neck to see the damage. Her view was blocked by quite a few employees, nurses and interns who were cleaning up. She was grabbed by a nurse, who guided her back into the classroom and sat her back down. Sadie squirmed, then slithered down to the floor again. Next to Lacross again. She curled on her side, dark eyes wide and blank. The hardness of the floor, the grim situation, none of it seemed to get to her anymore. She nervously tugged at Lacross' sleeve, staring at him, but not really seeing him.

Time passed. Was it time to switch out of recreation yet? Had they decided that putting a bunch of nuts into a small room was a bad idea? Sadie's gaze didn't move when she felt the stubborn pull of a nurse yanking on her arm, trying to pull her up. Sure, she was probably saying her name. Yeah, they wanted her to get up and move. No, she wouldn't do it. The same trance that had taken her for the past few days. She didn't care. Eventually, she was in a forced sitting position, two pills being shoved into her mouth. Sadie choked for a moment, thrown out of it by the feeling. Her medication. Fabulous. Did they have to give it to her here? Or had they found the mound of not-swallowed pills in her pillowcase? Probably. Most likely. Who cared? She surely didn't.

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Molly McMann Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke Character Portrait: Jesse Dosse
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There was only so much stupidity one person could handle. Jesse murmured softly to himself as he paced his room. After too many days of observation and solitary confinement, he was feeling more like a lab rat than a human being. Ha, rat. All for getting too close to a nurse. What the hell were boundaries? He wasn't stupid, but they expected way too much from a boy locked in a mental ward. Just saying. He squinted and turned as the door softly clicked. It was one of the interns, letting him out of his cage. Okay, maybe it was a room, not a cage. But it still was punishment to him. He wanted socialization. He wanted to talk to people. He wanted to be in the middle of everything. He had to be the center of attention, the charmer, the one that everyone wanted to be around. To have anyone else be the center of attention just wasn't going to work for him. Jesse pondered this as he was led to the recreation room.

People! He liked people. Jesse smiled, a charming, almost warm grin. He seemed so easy to talk to. So sweet. In a way he was, in a way he was just as manipulative and bad as any one else here. He made friends quickly. It was strange to see how easily you could make friends if you asked who was the common enemy and agreed that they were useless. Needless to say, he got caught up on the gossip (crazy people have gossip?) and the rules (wait, where was he again?)

Jesse never thought of himself as insane. Just misunderstood. Not looked at in the right light. Judged. And the worst of them all? Abandoned. His own family didn't love him. He saw the sadness in it rather than the fact that he had done something wrong. He hardly remembered half the sinister things he did anymore. Too much medication. Too much excitement. Soon enough he was caught up that there was the strange beast boy and the quiet girl on the floor, and to not go near them because beast boy was dangerous. Interesting. Then there was the girl with the super long hair who babbled constantly and had a tendency to get nasty.

Mind you, these were all spouts and rumours. Jesse decided to be nosy and take a look. He sauntered over to the group, crouching to look at the nearly catatonic Sadie and the seemingly agitated Lacross. "Hey, what's going on down here?"

There was a long silence, before Sadie twitched and muttered darkly, "Go away. If you don't leave me alone, Lacross will be the least of your troubles."

Touch act. Jesse frowned, but decided to back off before he got his face ripped off. A later time. He'd get her to open up. Or at least let him near the pretty girl. The crazy one. They were all crazy. Molly? Yeah. Jesse smirked and propped himself on a desk.

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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What an annoyance. Why couldn't people leave them alone? Sadie barely had to look at the painfully tall boy to know that he was going to be a nuisance. He'd been chattering with the other idiots. Talking about them. Murmuring bad things about her little trio. Lacross and Molly weren't even hers to call her trio, but at the moment, it was what she was going to call it. Her safe place. Nobody got too close, because they were afraid of at least one of them. It was better that way. Sadie let out a heavy sigh, pressing the heels of her palms against her face. She'd had enough. She was tired, depressed, and just not having it. Lacross seemed angry at best, and she didn't have the patience to explain to the nurse that she needed some time outside. The interns would never have it. She squinted at the other patient's feet as they scattered around the room. Paced. God, did they move a lot. It wasn't long before she felt a firm hand lift her up.

"Come on, enough of that." With that, she was practically carried out. She made small noises of annoyance the entire way, but didn't protest or try to walk on her own. What was the point of it? They would just throw her in her room and lose the key. She found herself on her bed again, staring at the same four walls. What was the deal? If she was miserable, they locked her here. If she stayed here and was miserable, they dragged her out into the public. Why? It was almost time for her therapy session. Joy.

Time passed like molasses on a cold day. Eventually, the sun had set, and she was just laying there. Staring at the wall. Wishing she could do something productive. Maybe willing herself the ability to cry. Anything that made her feel alive. Sadie could feel the hum of pain under the layer of fuzz and numbness. It was there. Pain would come first, and if she could wait it out, happiness. Right? It had to be there, somewhere. It wasn't just a lie, right? She rubbed at her eyes, small whining noises coming from her.

It was quiet in the hallway. The nurse was on her smoke break, and the other that was supposed to be watching the security cams was in the bathroom. Sadie slipped out of her room, dressed in her dark pajama bottoms and a black hoodie. She practically looked like someone getting ready to rob a bank, minus the hat. She yanked the hood over her face, moving quickly and quietly through the hallway. Her movements were nervous and light. Avoiding recognition and avoiding being taken back to her room. She needed out.

Characters Present

Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke Character Portrait: Jesse Dosse
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Sadie paced the courtyard, waiting patiently for everyone else to arrive. She felt exposed. The cool air brushed against her, tousling her hair ever so slightly, and she shook her head quickly. She wanted to see. She wanted to sit and be part of something more. But their leader hadn't arrived yet. Things weren't organized. Everything was sort of scattered, not quite right. Sadie stood in the light of the moon, just watching. A few people seemed to know what they were doing, but most looked as aimless as her. A heavy sigh escaped her. Part of her pondered the idea that they were watching, waiting for the society to gather, just to scoop them up like moths drawn to a light and smash them. What would their punishment be? Solitary? Solitary wasn't big enough for all of them. What kind of punishments did they have? Sadie had never been really punished while in the hospital. She had spent most of her time too quiet and well behaved to even think about what would happen when she acted out. Where was everyone? She was surrounded, but she felt alone.

Movement behind her. The shuffling of leaves, breathing. Another inmate. Sadie got very still, waiting for either a nurse or maybe someone familiar to say something. Her whole body tensed, and she felt someone tall and warm wrap around her. Lacross? She paused for a split second, then realized he didn't really walk on his two feet, and that made absolutely no sense. With a shriek, Sadie pulled away, and turned on her heel to stare upwards. It was that strange boy from rec. Jesse? Yeah. Jesse. Definitely not her friend. Definitely not the person, or sort of person she wanted it to be. "Don't touch me." She hissed shortly, crossing her arms and stepping away from him. Who the hell invited him to this meeting? How did he even get out? He was going to be trouble.

"If you're coming to the meeting...you sit, you shut up, and you do not touch me." Sadie's medication was wearing off, and she was quite cranky. Better off, Jesse intimidated her. At almost a foot taller than her and nearly twice as wide, and no sense of personal space, she wanted nothing to do with him.

"Easy, princess. I came looking for your friend. The pretty one."

Sadie glared at him, holding her chin high and moving closer to the gathering of people. "I don't know where she is. Go back inside." He was a nuisance. She gave him an annoyed look, then left him to his devices. His devices being that he wandered off, seeming dejected. He wasn't used to being told no. Instead of trying again, or trying to talk to the society members, he sat on the ground, patiently waiting for the meeting to start. Honestly, he didn't know about any sort of society. The howling was strange and he had followed out of sheer curiosity.

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Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke Character Portrait: Jesse Dosse
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Sadie looked around, her arms crossed tightly. Where was Molly? Didn't she usually come to these things? She didn't see Lacross, either. She glanced over when she saw shuffling in the grass, but thought nothing of it. Why would she? So instead of pausing there, she paced the perimeter of the courtyard. Moonlight practically doused the small area, a short pocket of clear skies before the clouds would partially cover the moon again. Sadie stopped and stared at the sky, as if counting the stars. The meeting was taking longer than usual to really get pulled together. Maybe it was something different. Something more special. They were out in the courtyard, somewhere exposed. Somewhere they could be easily seen. It worried her. It stressed her to no end. She paused when she heard movement next to her.

Jesse.

She rolled her eyes, holding her chin up. The movement reminded her of her spoiled mother. How she acted like she was so much better. Sadie still remembered some of her breeding when it came to people she didn't like. But he seemed to slump when she snubbed him. Sadie paused, her expression softening. She almost felt bad. Jesse looked...depressed. Well...maybe depressed was the wrong word. Rejected. Like she had hurt his feelings. Why did she care? But then, he seemed to be used to rejection. After a moment or two of thought, Sadie's shoulders slumped and she gave in.

"Hey, I'm sorry." It wasn't like her to apologize for her actions too much. But it seemed she had been too cruel earlier. She decided to engage him in some conversation. So they talked. Menial things. Like their past. Sadie wouldn't touch much on hers, but he explained how his family had left him here after being kidnapped. He didn't add the sexual abuse, or the reason his family had gotten spooked. In the end, it looked like a sad story. Boy gets kidnapped. Boy comes home. Family doesn't love him anymore. Sadie's eyes were wide as he reached the close of his explanation, and she pouted out her lower lip. "You're not the first, or the last." She murmured. She felt...terrible. He had been just as rejected as she had. As Lacross seemed to be from his family. From society. Unloved. Unwanted. And she had only served to make him feel bad.

"You're among friends. It'll be okay." She assured Jesse, who seemed to relax a little.

"Speaking of friends...where are yours?" Upon a queer expression from Sadie, he explained, "The two from the rec room. The pretty girl and the dog--thing."

Sadie instantly froze up. "His name is Lacross. Don't call him a dog." She responded coldly, "And as for Molly...I haven't the slightest..." She squinted at him, and turned to look at the hospital for a little while. He was definitely a strange one, she gave him that. But considering the circumstances, she had to forgive Jesse for it.

Jesse paced now, watching her, and looking around. The others seemed to disregard them. Closer, and closer, he inched towards her, and wrapped one arm around her shoulder. The hair on the back of Sadie's neck bristled up, and she looked up at him. Normally, she was affectionate, but there was something strange about him. "So it's just you? Not a lot of friends here, I hear."

Sadie shrugged her shoulders, easing away from him a little. "I have Lacross and Molly."

"Neither of which are here."

"They're around."

They stared at each other for a moment, before Jesse leaned in, a little too close for comfort, and smiled at her. "We can be friends, you know."

Sadie shook her head. "I should...go." She ducked out of his grasp and slowly made her way away from him.

"Your friends won't know! Quit acting like it's bad! You're not doing anything wrong. Why are you acting like I'm the weird one? Your friends with the girl who talks to herself and a feral boy, for chrissakes! He's not even here!" Jesse paused, frustrated by Sadie's refusal to go with his wants and needs. "Come on out, doggy doggy! C'mere! Be a good dog and come on out!"

Sadie glared at him, the anger starting to show on her face, a red hot blush coming to her cheeks. "He's not a dog! Stop it!"

"You mean you don't keep him around as your guard dog? To keep you all safe from the big nasty patients? What? You think you're better than me? Or any of them? They all think you're stuck up, Sadie. Little Sadie. Never smiles. Never cries. Never does anything. Just sits there in her special room because Mommy pays extra money."

Jesse was angry now, looming over her and whistling again. "Well come on! Where's your little wolf friend?! What's wrong with me? Is it because I'm not a freak?"

He was asking for a fight. He really was. Sadie trembled under his grasp, her dark eyes wide with anger and fear, squirming and yelling at him to stop. She didn't fear for her safety so much as she knew the damage that could be done. The nurses could hear them, and break up the meeting. He could start a fight. So much could go wrong and it would be her fault.

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Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke Character Portrait: Jesse Dosse
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Lacross was watching from the tall grass, watching everyone from the lonely wandering people that where in the courtyard to sadie for the sake of keeping watch on her. Normally he wouldn't care what kind of trouble people got into the most of the time; but with Sadie, to his knowledge, she had never really been out freely before. So watching to keep her safe by watching everything around wasn't too strange in his opinion.

He moved around the tall grass, move closer to sadie from people nearly treading on him from not noticing his hiding place and found something peculiar. The boy from earlier had reared his head again. He remembered giving him an angry snarl when he got to close and in part of him stepping on him in the process. Back then he got the hint from Sadie to back off and go on his way. But maybe that was because he himself was flailing under foot for him to get off. This time from where he was watching was playing out much differently.

Lacross watched as Jesse got way to close for comfort for either of them. He couldn't hear the conversation nor did he see what had happened before this, but from what he was seeing now it couldn't have started off well. Bestial rage started to bubble up into his mind, so much that he was actually physically shaking now, baring his teeth and was disparately trying to calm himself down to no help. This made him do something that he almost never did.

Stand upright.

The furs that he had on made him look more like the bear standing up right as he walked toward them. He was quiet, too quiet for anything to be right in his mind. His hood covered his face, covering eyes that glowed with anger. The calling that he could hear as he got closer fueled the fire, but he kept a seemingly calm dispossession. However, he felt something he rarely every felt before. A need for blood, a need for a fight, a need to kill the intruder. The mixing of his feral mind with the waking starting, but trying to keep it at bay for the sake of not loosing it.

Lacross was silent when he came up behind Jesse and Sadie, physcally shaking from his own hate for the boy.

"Well come on! Where's your little wolf friend?! What's wrong with me? Is it because I'm not a freak?"

"Freak...is the wrong word for you." he said once he was dangerously close to the boy. He grabbed him by the back of his neck and turned him around to look him in the eye. "She is not here for you entertainment or what ever you had in mind for her. For someone as spoiled as you are, I doubt you would understand." He said in a now growling tone and with malice dripping off his words. "I suggest you keep your distance, the blood calls and that doesn't happen quite often. Now run before my sense of mercy runs out."

His claws were at his neck, hovering and shaking as he held himself back from tearing him limb from limb. Nevermind that the feeling of his blood being spilled started to get to him, he had better things to do then be in solitary for the next 6 months.

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Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke Character Portrait: Jesse Dosse
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Sadie was sure this was going to end in the worst possible way. Why did it have to be tonight? She'd finally broken out of her shell and made her way outside, and this idiot had to happen. What the hell? Wasn't he supposed to be in solitary for assaulting a nurse? Sadie wasn't in the middle of the chaos, but she heard murmurs. The nurses tended to ramble when they were cleaning her up, the days where she just sort of stared. Her off days. She stared at Jesse, trying to read him. What made him this way? What could have possibly gone wrong in his head that he thought this was okay? She squeezed her eyes shut, not wanting to look at the offending boy any longer, even when she felt his hands on her. Wrong. He was cold. He was human in the worst way. The part that she could never relate to.

Then, he came out of nowhere. Lacross. She heard him before she saw him, and when she opened her eyes to turn and see him, she had to look again. He was huge. On two feet. Something she had never seen from him before. What had provoked such a strong statement? She hardly had time for her thoughts, because he grabbed Jesse, taking complete control of the situation. Sadie stumbled backwards, dark eyes wide as saucers as she watched the two. Lacross was absolutely menacing. Nothing like the gentle being she knew. Not the one she laid on the floor with and cuddled. Not the one she hid behind when she was irritated with her own feelings. No. This was different.

A threat. A heavy threat. One that, in the pit of her stomach, Sadie knew could become anything but empty. It made her uneasy, if we were being very light about it. "Lacross..." She started softly, but retracted a little. Her words caught in her throat. It was just too much. Jesse looked all but horrified, as if he finally understood the situation. His selfish, prince like attitude seemed to drain out of him like the blood out of his face, leaving him pale and pathetic. Despite his height, and his strength that he boasted about, he was nothing next to what he described as the beast.

"Okay, okay, call him off, Sadie....Sadie? Sadie!" His tone was desperate, and he turned to look at her.

"I told you I don't control him. He's of his own free will." She responded softly, shifting her uneasy gaze towards Lacross. She bit her lower lip, reaching with a shaky hand to lightly touch his arm. "He's not worth it. The meeting should be starting soon." She wasn't sure if she could get across to him, but it was worth a shot. Jesse was staring at the two as if she was speaking in tongues and he had just risen from under the ground. There was a certain streak of horror that was reserved for idiots like him.

Finally, he wrenched away, stumbling backwards to land on his backside. Jesse scrambled to his feet, staring at the two of them for a few moments. "This isn't over! You'll see!"

Sadie stiffened, stepping away from Lacross and moving towards Jesse. Her gaze shifted from fear to sheer anger. "Speak a word of this and I'll make the punishment you got for attacking that nurse look like a few days in the rec room!" She hissed. Her voice broke as she spoke, ranging from squeaky to dark to squeaky again. Dark eyes glimmered in the moonlight with a new spark of something. Possibly tears. She really wasn't sure. Sadie watched as he stumbled a few times, falling on his face. She shook her head, yanking the hood to her jacket over her head, shielding her face.

She couldn't look at Lacross. This mess was all her fault, and he had to come out and fix it. She felt so foolish it ached. Sadie quickly wiped at tears that came almost without her knowledge. It had been so long since she actually cried. But she bottled it back up, like she had spilled something horrible onto the carpet and was trying to act like it never happened. She hung her head, arms crossed tightly around herself. "That was...I'm..."

No words would fix it.

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Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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Lacross watched him run off, holding himself back from giving chase. He could feel the rage subsiding just a little, but he knew that the boy would be back or at least find a way to get back at it him for interrupting his 'play time' with Sadie. The male took a deep breath, slowly gaining back his gentle dispossession.

"Are you alright?" He asked, now collected in his thoughts. He didn't bother to get back down on all fours again, in case the other male decided to come back for seconds. He could see the tears and feel her fear; he whimpered. He caused this. In an effort to protect her, he had also caused fear and terror. "I apologize that you had to see that. That side of me almost never comes out, I don't even remember the last time it came out." He said, pushing a rock with his foot. He genuenly felt bad about it and understood if Sadie never wanted to see him again or feared him to the point of avoiding him. That's how it was for him. How it always was.

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Character Portrait: Lacross Cromwell Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke
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Sadie hesitated, still covering the majority of her face with her hands. She felt ridiculous. She looked like a child that couldn't deal with the idiot kids on the playground. And worse, she had managed to make Lacross feel bad for trying to help her. It was everything she had fought against. The tears rolled but she didn't sob. Instead, she just shook her head and took a sharp breath. She needed to find her words. The things that she lost so constantly. The emotions that she hid from until it hurt and then scrambled to find. She couldn't figure out what she wanted anymore.

It then occurred to her how strangely human he was at that very moment. Sadie looked at him. Not just glanced, but really looked at him. The one who understood. The one who was cast off as some sort of freak. Who even she had yet to fully understand. He was a cross of what she feared most and what she envied most. Maybe they were the same thing. But he was apologizing. He was apologizing for stepping in and fixing what could have been a horrible situation. She paused for a few moments, trying to collect her thoughts.

Why was he so sorry? Sadie lowered her hands, exposing herself to him in what felt to be the strangest way. "Don't apologize. Please don't." She cleared her throat as her voice cracked and squeaked. "Don't feel bad for caring. It's more than anyone..." Anyone had done in years. Most actions were done out of pity, or pure duty by the nurses. Sometimes her mother came by and talked to her out of feeling obligated. Nobody ever did anything this drastic. There was no need for him to do it. But there he stood, and he was sorry for upsetting her?

"You didn't make me cry." She stated firmly, "So don't get that in your head. I'm just..." Sick. Just as sick as anyone else there. Her hands shook. She felt sick. All her words were messed up and she wasn't even sure how to feel. Instinct took over. She lost her words. She lost the ability to hold her chin up and pretend it was all cool. The walls broke and she moved in the flash of an eye, wrapping her arms around him in a tight hug. Sadie was still, the side of her head pressed to his chest. All the jumbled thoughts in her head stopped for just a moment. Peace.

Right before she realized how foolish she seemed, and quickly snapped away. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have even come out tonight." She gritted her teeth, backing away, pulling her hood up, and shutting the world out as quickly as it came to her. It was too much for one night. She wanted to sit by the fire, listen to the others talk, and maybe get a few of her own thoughts sorted out. She hadn't expected any of this.

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Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke Character Portrait: Jesse Dosse
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Sadie lingered outside for what couldn't have been more than a few minutes. Jesse and Lacross both disappeared. This left her nobody to accompany her at the meeting. She was alone. Molly still hadn't arrived. Maybe she was sleeping this one through. Sadie didn't know. She ran her hands nervously though her hair, pacing the courtyard for a while before finally making her way back into the building. She tip-toed, trying to be as quiet as possible while moving back towards her room. It was all too much for one night. She moved quickly, but not very gracefully, trying to get back to safety as soon as possible. It didn't help that she tripped over a chair outside of one of the rooms, causing quite the noise. Sadie shot up off the floor, eyes wide and cheeks dark red as she righted herself. At least nobody saw it, or seemed to hear it. No nurses came for her yet. She pursed her lips, moving forward again. Maybe it would go smoothly. She could get into her room and go to bed and pretend none of this even happened.

Bam! She slammed into a solid body, letting out an audible squeak. "I-I'm--" She cut off, realizing it wasn't an orderly. It wasn't a nurse, and it wasn't the Matryum. It was Jesse. Sadie recoiled, scrambling to her feet. "Aren't you supposed to be in your room?"

Jesse shrugged his shoulders, as if it was a casual meeting. "Aren't you?" This earned a sharp, bitter glare from her. Sadie stuck her chin up, only to feel rough hands grab it. "Easy, princess."

Her response never came, as a nurse approached the two of them. She had brought two of the interns with her, who promptly diffused the situation, grabbing Jesse and taking him to his room, and doing the same with Sadie. It was her first offense, and a mild one at that. She'd hardly done anything wrong, so it wasn't noted beyond the nurse telling her to leave it be. Jesse was back in his room, steaming. Every time. She was always being rescued by some self righteous prick. She never said no, she never stood up for herself. And even if she did say no, she never gave him a good enough reason why not. Jesse fumed. She was infuriating. He didn't even want much to do with her. He wanted her pretty friend. The one with the hair that she couldn't seem to keep track of. Jesse hadn't thought to try and find her after re-entering the building. But it didn't matter. He would find her in daylight, where it was okay for them to be wandering the halls.

He waited for the longest time. Seething. There was no keeping him locked up. So he wandered. Out of the room, away from the nurses, away from the other patient's rooms. There was a very faint, strange smell in the air. He stopped to look outside, to see maybe if the patients had started a bonfire in the courtyard. Nothing. Odd. He frowned, but continued onward. To parts of the hospital long forbidden and forgotten. Wood, tarp, nails everywhere. He was alone to think. But the scent was stronger. Strange. He paced through the hallway, muttering to himself. The weird smell was still way off. He wandered through the hall, but found nothing. Just empty rooms. It seemed to be going over his head. Literally. How the hell was anyone up there?

The whole thing didn't make sense. Jesse growled, and leaned against one of the piles of wood, disgruntled.

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Character Portrait: Sadie Blarke Character Portrait: Jesse Dosse
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Jesse could have slapped him. But he didn't. Instead, he sauntered back to his room. He was insane. He knew better than to provoke Lacross any further, not without backup. Not without someone to protect him. The last thing he needed was that beast to tear him limb from limb. Then he would have no chance to get at what he wanted. Instead, he quickly snuck back to his room, annoyed and fully of jealousy. It wasn't right. He didn't want to deal with this freak. But he was getting in the way of everything. Jesse wanted power. And Lacross, in his mind, was in the way of it. He would tear him down if he got in the way again.

Sleep didn't want to come to Sadie. She stared out the window, watching the occasional car whiz by. Her room was positioned in such a way that she could see incoming patients and outgoing doctors. She could see the road. The vague lighting from the traffic lights down the road. If it snowed, she saw the trucks come through to plow it. She was exhausted, but something kept her awake. Something nagged at her. She didn't want to be alone. She wasn't sure what she wanted beyond that. Sadie moaned and clutched at her head, sinking down onto her bed. Maybe a sleeping pill wouldn't hurt. A nurse had escorted her back and handed her a pill, but Sadie hadn't taken it. She clenched her teeth, squeezing her eyes shut. What did it matter? She had utterly messed up her one chance to make friends. And even gained an enemy.

She partially wondered what was going on in the meeting. If everything was okay down there. But her head buzzed, and she sunk further into herself. Everything hurt. Maybe this was why she blocked it all out. Better to feel nothing than to hurt all the time. Right? She wasn't sure at this point. Sadie wanted to go back a few years and re-live life before she fell apart. But everyone knew that would never happen.