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Ephemeral Pleasures

Introduction

Dear Diary,

I asked Mama about where songs came from today, and she said she didn't know. All she knew was that they appeared in envelopes when you were born. Yellow for girls, Purple for boys, and Black for people like my sister. Then there was White, but she said she didn't want to get into that.

It's usually nice songs. Those songs that get Papa and Mama to swoon and dance in the living room. Mine is locked away up in the attic. Mama said if someone ever tried to steal my song, I'd disappear. I can't imagine that, so I don't show my friends the paper with my lyrics on it anymore. Every rip and dirt on my paper effects me pyschologicaly. Not my physical, so no one would know if my paper got caught on fire or if a rat started eating away at it. Only I would, because I'd become delusional or something like that. I'd become like the infamous Alexander William. He accidently threw his lyric papers away in the recycling bin. Once he realized what he had done, it was too late.

He's in an asylum now.

I'm going to let you in on a little secret, but you can't tell anyone, alright? My sister has a bad song. No one knows but us because we keep her in the basement 24\7. I think we keep her there because she's like Alexander William, but I'd never say.
Her song was always like that, as far as I know. It was loud whenever you opened up the black envelope and it began playing from no where in particular. It was more of screaming and it wasn't like my warm song at all. Mama told me her song is the reason why Papa's right eye is blind. I don't get it, but I don't want to.

I feel bad for my sister. She has to wake up to that song, go to sleep with that song, and die with that song. I suppose thats why she acts like she does. My Mama has a scar on her right arm from her. I don't go near the basement anymore. Sometimes I hear her though. When its real quiet in the house and at those rare moments when Papa has the TV turned off. She talks to herself. Sometimes I can hear her thrashing around in her bed and kicking at the walls. I don't know how Papa manages to get her food down there and come back up alive. It worries me, really.

Well, I have to go. Mama said she'll sleep with me if I go to bed early tonight. Sometimes, I stay awake and let her fall asleep before me just so I can hear her song softly play from no where in particular.

With love,
Eliza





Quick facts

- People go to sleep to their song, wake up to their song, and die to their song.

- People cannot willingly play their song, though they can show the lyric paper.

- Any damage done to the lyric paper is damage to the actual holder of the paper. [ Pyschological ]
Same thing for the holder. Any pyschological damage done to the holder is done to the paper.

- If an individual steals another individual's lyric paper, the holder of the lyric paper stolen will steadily lose touch with reality, and eventually disappear. The individual who stole the lyric paper is untouched and unharmed.

Roles

Yellow Envelopes
1] Amelie Recoren played by RosexXxStarlight
2] Mackenzie Rush played by PandoraBox

Purple Envelopes
1] Fanta Idlewilde played by Yonbibuns
2] Sno Luvllaby played by XxanexiaxX
3] Xaviell "zack" Saarik played by Wake E.V.
4] Aquroya Heartnett played by MagicalNeko
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Black Envelopes
1] Alacia "Alice" Hart played by Karri Khaos

White Envelopes
1] Reserved for Kestral
2] Fray Summers played by XxanexiaxX
3] Indigo Selina Meath played by LozerFanAnah
4] Iggy Johnson played by SuckOnMyJuiceBox
5] Engel Mia Blau Himmel played by NathanNitrogen


Black Envelopes -- Carries a deeply disturbing song. Usually posesses strong negative emotions and inflicts pain on nearby people. The holder of this song is more than often disturbed in some pyschological state. Ranging from paranoia, to halluccinations, to lost of touch from reality and everything inbetween. This envelope is given to both male and females, though it is very rare.

Yellow Envelopes -- Carries 'normal' songs. Posesses positive emotions, meaningful and sometimes tells a story within the lyrics. Usually longer than Purple Envelopes. This envelope is only given to females.

Purple Envelopes -- Carries 'normal' songs. Posesses positive or\both meaningful lyrics. On rare occasions will these lyrics tell a story, though it is possible. These songs seem to play louder than yellow envelope songs. This envelope is only given to males.

White Envelopes -- Carries meaningful songs. Usually tells about a major event in the future, or lyrics that sum up the kind of invididual that person will be. -- Can tell a story. This envelope is given to both male and females, though it is rare.



Character Sheet

Code: Select all
Full Name:(  Example: Bob Paco Smith)
Age: (15-30)
Gender: (Male or Female. Unless theres some other gender I dont know about..?)
Habits: (Biting nails, rolling eyes, etc,)
Nationality: (Spanish, French, Americano etc, ;D )
Bio: (Personality)
Family: (C'mon guys. It's realistic, I don't want everyone coming from some tragic situation at home. Be creative >:o )
Appearence: (Picture or a one paragraph description. Anime Only!.)
Envelope: (White Envelope, 2. etc.)
Song: (With Lyrics! :D Make sure it matches your envelope color!)

Toggle Rules

Needs to be atleast two paragraphs in each post.

I don't like Mary Sues. : [

No Godmodding.

No stealing other people's lyric paper without the other character's permission. *Fist shake*

And have fun. :D Or else I'll find you.

The Story So Far... Write a Post » as written by 9 authors

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It felt silly cradling someone in his arms that didn't even really belong to him. A creature so perfect that it couldn't possibly belong to him, even if his jumbled heart lopped sideways as if avoiding certain death. To be so scared when surrounded by hundreds of other people—Mia, Iggy, Indigo and the others that populated the messy apartment, it was ridiculous. Pressing his body into the contours of Indigo's small frame, he guessed she was just as afraid as he was. Maybe she wasn't. Maybe she knew. And in the midst of the silence, only accompanied by sharp intakes of breath and the fall of Indigo's chest, their world continued to crumble. In situations such as this, he thought everything was less of a ticket, and more of a death sentence, but he didn't like to think of it that way. This was threatening the very balance of their lives, they were grasping at straws and playing innocent. He dipped his chin to his chest, as if straining to hear the rasping sounds rumbling in the figure he held tightly against him. His hunched shoulders finally sagged with relief when he heard her quiet whistles—she was breathing, she was alive. Mia still loomed by the door, staggering into robotic movements to gather the blankets and he appreciated the boys' presence. Thank you, thank you.

And Iggy's racked form stumbled into the bedroom, teetering a half-empty or half-full glass in his dripping hands. Fanta raised his head from his chest and stared, wondering what thoughts tortured his friend. He didn't want to know. He couldn't know. What little water was left in the glass sloshed unforgivingly on the floor, creating puddles that weren't meant to be in the house but would go unnoticed until it caused an accident. Somehow, it was fitting for the situation. There was no way he hadn't noticed Iggy's fingers tightening around the glass, held in both of his hands as he wobbled in the doorway. His mouth worked to explain something—anything, but nothing came and instead he muttered something about not slipping. Why did guilt suddenly plunge him into silence? Why was he even guilty? Staring vacantly at the boy with avalanche eyes and cigarette lips, there was nothing he wanted more than to pull Iggy by the hand and keep him grounded. Gently squeezing Indigo's shoulder with calloused, farm boy hands, his dark eyes pleaded quietly when Iggy's gaze drifted towards Indigo's clutching fingers. Without him, he was nothing. A small, non-existent blip on the radar. A boat capsizing without any life savers aboard. Fanta didn't want him to walk away, but a small disgusting inkling in his chest tightened and he knew what was coming. Admittedly, he wanted to confess a few things but the tight knot in his chest rendered him useless. I'm a mess, like that goddamn grandfather clock in the living room with the ragged edges, so stop.

Iggy approached with unsteady steps, wavering at his side with the precariously empty cup held poised to Indigo's lips. No reaction. She stiffly refused any liquids, he might have seen her lip quiver if he squinted hard enough. When Iggy mentioned something about picking up smokes, Fanta's fingers fumbled against the sheets and reached for the fabric of Iggy's shirt. Bitterness dripped from his lips and he almost winced, fingers dropping back against Indigo's waist. As if he were fighting against invisible shackles, his body shook with hitching noises that he only barely buried back into his chest. Adjusting his grip on her slim shoulders, he pulled her against his him so that her head rested near his shoulder, and he breathed slowly through his mouth. He was a man, he was a man. He jammed the bottom of his palm against one dark eye, covering half of his face and fought against the unmanly urges to break down. Even if he'd always posed as the strong statue, unwaveringly holding the world in his palms, emotions weighed heavy on his shoulders. Sometimes it was the half-parted lips that screamed speeches at the noose.

I just wanted to say. “Fan?” This hurts.

Suddenly, Fanta was burying his face against Indigo's unruly hair, only finally pulling away when he felt eyelashes flutter against his forearm. And he almost cried in front of someone. The shock was more than enough to stifle his croaking sounds, he straightened and rubbed ruefully at his dark eyes with his knuckles. He could only spot Indigo's brilliant eyes from slits, like staring between a door that was left ajar. “Indi...” He mumbled quietly, a low rumble in his tight throat. “You okay?”

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Mia had lost all feeling in every cell in his body because the feeling in the apartment was stuffy and left him feeling like he was being squeezed in on himself. He wanted someone to talk to and someone to spill all his secrets to; that was Indigo. Damn he didn't even know where the blankets were and yet he'd taken it upon himself to try and find them; why? He felt some need to do something useful for people he didn't know because he couldn't help the people he did know. When it came to being useful he ran in the last spot - Mia just couldn't do anything. For the life of him he always tried and always failed. because a person like him could never help others. He still couldn't even help himself.

Eventually he found himself back in the hallways he'd started in and saw Iggy standing. To him it looked like the redhead was about to either pass out or break out in tears. It made him upset to see someone else upset. He wanted to go and hug him but the possibility of that happening were probably slim to none in his case. Maybe he could get away with trying to comfort him - that was probably the one thing he was best at. Comfort. Mia vaguely wondered if it would be helpful to mention things Indigo had said about him. The way Indigo spoke about the two of them made them look like Greek Gods towering over Olympus with their mighty powers. She made them look like oxygen and water. But what Mia saw in the two of them was a weakness; a crack in the foundation. Gods were strong - they were human.

"Iggy?" he called out as quietly as he could - taking slow steps towards the redhead. What he wanted to do was hug him tightly and try to absorb all the negative emotions. Cancel them out and make them nonexistent because he wasn't supposed to feel that way. He was supposed to feel happy, wonderful, perfect. He was supposed to be strong, tough, excellent. He was supposed to have everything Indigo said he was because that was the way it was meant to be. Mia always saw things to be what they could be and not what they were. That was why he always touched odd coloured hair. It could be real even if it wasn't.

The male began to fiddle with the hem of his shirt because he didn't know if the man he addressed would be open to speak with him. He didn't know if anything he said would make life any better. He didn't know anything. He was stupid. Stupid when it came to trying to help people. Mia had no idea how to make people feel better or how to make life seem like it wasn't some shit hole for someone else. "You'll be okay." Recycling words was the only way he got anywhere close to having any idea of how to help.

It could hurt a lot less.

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Mama, they declared me gone.

Iggy deserved a handful of happy now and then, too. Iggy needed love, just like everyone else. He yearned for large arms to comfort him, and words of reassurance. Something to ease away blood shot eyes and clear away trembling hands. Was it so much to ask for something to be requited? Just one time; a question answered. His love returned. Wanted words actually said. It didn't matter if she felt it, or he thought it. It didn't count unless it was actually done. Actions spoke louder than words, and he didn't even get that. He got empty words and hollow promises. A habit he picked up as his own, and not failing once to disappoint daddy dearest. Even if his father didn't know it yet, Iggy was the biggest screw up his father had ever made. Since the day Iggy opened his eyes to the day his will is read. Even if no one knew it.

The problem was knowledge, and how people owned so little. Ignorance was the mightiest weapon in this war, and words would always be there to back it up in case drunks like Iggy didn't feel the sting fast enough. There were unfortunate days when Iggy did feel it, though. The way the pressure behind his eyes would cause the back of his neck to ache, and how nameless things rested in the pit of his stomach. Those were the days when liquid in a bottle would only do so much comfort, and treading through water became too much of a task. Days when all he wanted to do was board up his windows and give a big fuck you to society. Days like today.

"Iggy?"

He could hear the hesitance in Mia's voice. How his name was weighed down with uncertainty, and stretched into a question. Iggy could've been misinterpreting everything, but it was just a could’ve. There was a lot of could’ve in Iggy’s time spent. Indigo could’ve loved him. Fanta could’ve loved him that last november, when all Iggy had thought about was Fanta's large hands and statuesque eyes when he was lonesome. He could’ve stood up for himself in fifth grade when Andrew Stewarts crushed his juice box. He could’ve done a lot of things, and he couldn’t help but wonder if he had done them, if things would’ve turned out different. For better, or for worse. As long as it changed the fact that his fists were shaking as he turned to face Mia.

Iggy murmured, “I don’t.. It’s not..”

None of what was coming out made sense. He wanted to explain to Mia exactly what was on his mind. Let him have a taste of what he was feeling, so Mia could tell him if it was alright to cry. That was all he asked for. Not for Indigo, not for another bottle, and not for his mom’s voice. Just to have a good cry, and go to sleep. He was so tired, and his legs didn’t want to hold him anymore. No one did, and he didn’t blame them.

“I just..” Iggy licked his lips, then stared at the puddle on the floor. There were no words to express what he was feeling. Hell, he himself didn’t know what he was feeling. It was ambiguity. He just knew what he wanted, and that was enough for him today. He was satisfied with the wreck he created.

“Mia,” Iggy gave a subtle look to him. “Wanna have a smoke outside?”

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She was fine even if her eyes wanted to water and her heart wanted to jump out of her mouth because it hurt so much. She wanted to say she was fine; wanted to say that absolutely nothing was wrong with anything inside of her. Indigo wanted to hold onto Fanta and just cry her eyes out but Indigo didn't cry. The last time she'd cried was when she was born and was being held in the loving arms of her mother. She could hear her song playing in the back of her head and she knew what it was saying. What it was trying to get her to do because it knew she would never do it on her own. Never in her life would Indigo ever ask for what she knew she needed and wanted.

Say, say my name. Need a little love to ease the pain.

She moved the hand she had against his skin and pressed it to his chest because if she kept staying so close she'd do something regretful. How much did she wish that the three of them were polygamists? That they were all married to each other and could be together freely as they wished so that their world wouldn't come crashing down. God Indigo really wanted to be able to have both of them and have all of them have each other and have it feel completely normal to them because they were meant to be together. Even if not in the way she wanted they were meant to be tangled in each other's lives. And as she looked into eyes that always seemed to ooze comfort she knew it was true. Indigo was willing to die for them if it helped them continue on living the way they were. Fucked up but together.

"Fanta....." God was she about to make the biggest mistake in her life? Was she about to completely rip up the beautiful canvas that was the three of them? She felt she was. Indi - she was Indi - and Indi was a person who liked to tear down perfect things. She liked to watch as the Eiffel Tower collapsed. She liked to watch the main character's relationship crumble. She liked to watch a rose slowly dry out and loose its luster. Perfect things could become more perfect and Indi was not a person who agreed with that. "I'm sorry." Regretful was something she felt all the time. She regretted losing her mother, she regretted leaving her father, she regretted smoking, she regretting drinking, she regretting pressing a soft lipped kiss to Fanta's pulse.

It was all in her own benefit though to hide from the negative emotions. Feeling loved made her forget that she was torn all up inside herself. It was why she always bordering on that thin line between nymphomaniac and Indigo. It wasn't the act itself but the emotions she felt. She wondered vaguely if it would be any different with Fanta or Iggy; the two people she loved more than anything or anyone in the world. If the emotions would be stronger, realer and more effective.

I could fake it, but I'd still want more.

Was she going to finally admit the secret of her life without any prompting? She was.

"I love him."

Indigo seemed to cling onto him more tightly because she didn't want him to ask who it was. It was enough that she had even admit that she loved anybody because her whole life had been denial of love. It never lasted. It was fickle. It was a lie. It hurt. It was corrupted. It gave power. It took power. It made people weak. It made people strong. It had taken away her mother.

Love was something she'd never forgive. But she was destined for it. That damn song made sure of it.

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Fanta's mouth moved to say something, anything to fill the silence that created a black hole between them. Nothing came. No deep rumbles smoothed it's way through the passages of his raw throat, he swore he could still taste tequila and other poisons on his lips—maybe that was why, or maybe not. He wanted to bury his face into her neck, inhale until he slept and find Iggy in the morning. The most important people in his life were like cans of acrylic paint stumbling down a hollow canvas, thin and sad creatures like bending willows, and he wanted desperately to be the ragged artist discovering their colours. Knuckles were still nestled into the hollows beneath his glossy eyes, until he set them neatly down across his own lap and onto her leg. Fanta wanted to say that he'd sew her up good, and hoped that she'd believe him; hoped that she would say, 'Alright, I'll be alright.' These were moments that he would keep in the helmet-shattering pavement of his heart, kept beside the moment he met two people by accident, blown away by them both.

And he didn't want to find any pretty words to say; didn't want to smooth out the creases and whisper that everything was fine, because it certainly wasn't. Fanta watched Indigo's fingers trail off his arm, press gently against his chest, it caused him to look up. It felt like life had handed him a magical eight ball, a foreboding shake and he'd find out something that would upset his future. Good or bad, he wasn't sure. All he knew was that he couln't stumble along without them—Iggy and Indigo—he couldn't move on, he couldn't be left behind. He felt like he was swimming in a sea of leave-it's, paddling along with the warm feeling of strong vodka's swilling in the depths of his stomach. Fanta's blurred gaze wavered from Indigo's dirty-blond hair to her cloudy eyes, and she had a look that screamed: breathing is secondary, this comes first. Maybe he was misinterpreting it, just like he'd misinterpreted Iggy's advances. Mistook his smiles for approval, like always.

Iggy was a painful reminder that his charms didn't work on everyone, even if he wanted with all of his heart. The back of his skull was bruised with the rejection, not broken, just enough to hurt like a constant reminder of what he could never have. He hoped his pulse was always beating in the back of his mind, flailing fists pressed on bone and lips that offered constellation kisses. It made his head spin whenever they were close, and he felt like it wasn't fair to anyone. What-if's dominated every facet of his thoughts: what-if they could be? What if Indigo let him in? What if they could all be together, forever? It seemed childish. It seemed right. Couldn't they all live in a big house with red shutters, laughing to spite reality?

“Yuh', Indi?” Fanta rumbled, realizing his eyes had been closed, opened them and looked down into his friends face. There was something in her eyes that made him want to shake her, rip her away from whatever troublesome thoughts that was making her look at him like that. His heart lumbered against her, as if it were pulling elephants into the sea to drown—it seemed like a perfectly good metaphor of what he was feeling because he couldn't seem to say anything else. Hiding whispers in the curls of her hair and the stubble on his jawline, Indigo would melt the sculpture of walls that they promised to keep their beating hearts behind. From the looks of it, her heart was bleeding form the center and there was nothing he could do to keep the car from crashing. Absently, Fanta's eyes trailed to the puddle strewn across the floor, water meant for Indigo's parched lips, Iggy meant for Indigo. Who would he be left with? I'm sorry. And he braced himself for the crash, cradling her like she was his deployed air bag. Maybe, he'd only escape with a broken face? Indigo's lips feathered across his wrist, causing his eyes to tear away from the puddle and back down into her eyes. He didn't want to witness it; he didn't.

So do what you must do to fill that hole.

Focusing on every inhalation, every exhalation. Fanta inwardly crumbled, hunched over her scattered pulse and pupils, begging himself to find the strength to tell her not to leave him behind. Not to leave them behind. Indigo, Fanta and Iggy. Indigo and Iggy. He didn't want to be afraid; didn't want to move away from her just because of an intuitive feeling that told him to run—and he wasn't usually wrong, he was never wrong. He didn't want to become the one who got left behind. I love him. Strangled words swelled in his gut, rose to his throat as thick as bile and like she'd hoped, he found nothing to say. What could he say? It was as if his greatest fears had just been confirmed. Iggy loved Indigo, and she loved him back. Where did he fit in? Where did he fit? No walls could keep him protected. Indigo nestled her face against his chest, wrapped her arms around his back and clung to him more tightly than before, but his hands dropped to his sides where they belonged. It was hard enough to keep the shocked look from his face; eyebrows knitting together, causing crease-lines on his forehead.

“Y—ya' can't,” Fanta whispered, bowing his head, and then stronger. “Yuh' can't.”

And with his song, he was created from desperation. It was what made him so damn selfish.

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The blunette hated to see people suffer especially over something that wasn't even proven to cause the suffering. It was like how he'd watched his pet gerbil curl up into a ball and shudder for days - it was it's own fault. It had no reason to suffer if it would just eat the food that Mia gave it everyday. Maybe that had spawned his need to absolutely help anyone who was in any kind of pain; he hadn't been able to help his pet gerbil. A silly reason to feel this need to be a shield from pain but it was all in his head that it justified it. Besides Mia understood the importance of allowing people the shoulder they needed should they have to cry or the voice they needed should they need the comfort. He couldn't be the voice but he could be the shoulder because he absorbed pain from other and made it his own because he didn't know what pain felt like anymore. He'd felt so much when his parents died that once the fact set in he didn't see a reason to feel pain for anything else for nothing else could match up.

"Just eat the food Martin. It'll make you better."

When the offer for a smoke was played he didn't know if he could accept it with the copious amounts of snow tumbling down from the heavens. It wasn't his place to deny it though because that would probably only make the situation worse in his eyes. Iggy was in enough pain - denying the offer would only cause more. So he nodded and reached a hand up to tug at the ribbon tied loosely around his neck. "Ja." Mia dropped his eyes to the floor and his hands to the rim of his shirt; he had his own offer to make. Whether or not Iggy accepted his offer was dependent on the red head who stood taller than him with more emotion on his face. The male thought he probably looked apathetic compared to how everyone else in the apartment was probably feeling. Maybe he looked like he didn't give a shit about anything that was happening even though he felt like the atmosphere was eating him inside out. Swallow the guilt, forget the pain, help someone else. Don't worry about yourself. Mantra, over and over so that he wouldn't start to choke up just when someone needed him.

"Hey, Iggy. I-If you want to talk about it or something I'll listen." He lifted his sky blue eyes and gave a weak smile as he took a step closer and placed a gentle hand on Iggy's arm. "You can even cry if you want to," he muttered. It was probably something horrible to say at the time but it always seemed to work with Indigo. That was the root of all healing, his mother had told him long ago. Let someone come to you and tell them it's okay to cry. The feelings exit with the tears. Mia was used to feeling tears on his shoulders or having to wipe away the tears from someone's cheeks as they choked out a laugh and muttered how pathetic they probably looked.

"No. You don't look pathetic. You look strong."

And then he'd offer a genuine smile and say it as many times as they needed to hear it because it took strength to cry in front of someone. There was nothing weak or pathetic about crying over something that tore people apart. It was strong and sturdy and completely okay. Mia wanted Iggy to know that. Iggy had to know that.

"You can.... You can cry if you want to. I'll listen to your words, I'll wipe away your tears." A short breath and he moved his hand from Iggy's arm. "It's okay to cry." Would it work like it did with everyone else?

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Pity? Not quite. Pity; sympathetic sorrow for one suffering, distressed, or unhappy. Suffering. That wasn't right. It tasted wrong, like slightly soiled milk, but you had to take another sip, just in case. It wasn't distressed neither, that just reminded him of a girl. Iggy wasn't a girl, but he wasn't a man either. Men don't cry, or love their best friends, and that was why when Mia had offered a shoulder to cry on, he had choked back a sob and blinked; one. two. three times. Held his mouth into a straight line, and refused to let his face crumble. And after a moment or so, he was okay. Not good, or fantastic, but okay, and that was enough. Aches and pains would go away with kisses. Kisses that exhaled danger and inhaled nicotine. He loved it, but wouldn't think twice if he had the chance to destroy every last fragment of it. You don't miss chances. That leads you to nowhere. Gets you stuck, and you could take his word for it.

In that moment, Iggy realized there was no right or wrong. It was only what you were willing to give, and what you could withstand. If you couldn't withstand shit, and you weren't willing to give a fucking 'I love you, Fanta', or ' I love you, Indigo', then you were just wasting your time on nothing. Too busy with empty bottles and your own selfish bullshit to think things through enough so you can get your grip on this thing called reality. A thing everyone was trying to escape to, and being miserable with it. It was damn hard, and you can bet he had slept face-down onto his pillow the night it had struck him that Fanta was not an option. His shoulders hadn't stop shaking until two in the morning, and he had just been glad he sounded as sick as he felt. A phone call and an excuse was his ticket out of having to explain blood-shot eyes. Iggy hadn't forgotten about Fanta, though. He was far from forgetting that, because when something hits hard, it hits hard. But he could deal with that one fuck up in his life. He could, really. But he couldn’t take Indigo’s rejection also. He just couldn’t.

"Thank you." Did he just say that?

He began to say something else, but shuffled ahead of Mia instead.
As he entered the living room, he was surprised to see almost everyone had gone. That, or everyone had toned it down a notch since the last time he was in here. He hoped nothing was broken, and that no one had gone through his refrigerator. He wasn’t going to clean anything up. Not tonight. Where’d Christmas go?

Iggy patted his jean pockets as he walked down the stairs that led to the back of his apartment and outside. He didn’t look back to see if Mia had followed. Mia had said yes, hadn’t he? He had, Iggy was sure. Even if Iggy hadn’t completely absorbed everything else Mia had said, he had definitely heard the yes. The ‘yeah’ that was drowning in his accent and came out as a ‘ja’. It sounded nice. Like after pedaling up a steep hill on your bike, then finally getting to the top and practically gliding all the way back down to the bottom. Iggy liked to hear Mia talk. His voice was nice. It reminded him of his mom, caring, but not baring any innocence. Like they knew exactly what he was thinking, and didn’t know whether to be disgusted or comforting, because sure was one thing everyone wasn't.

A ‘tsk’ sound came from his lips when he realized he had no cigarettes on him. He had smoked the last one with Fanta. Or maybe Fanta had taken his pack. He couldn’t remember because Fanta was never a good subject. But it was better than thinking about Indigo. So, so much better, because he actually had a chance when it came to Indigo. It wasn’t a ‘could’ve’ with Indigo like it was with Fanta. Indigo was a ‘would’ve’, because it was so fucking possible. All she had to do was agree. A fucking nod, or any kind of approval. He didn’t even need approval, a smidgen of a maybe is better than a no. Rejection was the worse. It bruised and left whoever behind battered and scarred. Traumatized, and no doctorate therapist can fix shit. A whole ‘nother degree was needed for the kind of impact that Fanta, Iggy, and Indigo were sure to get. If someone told Iggy that they were all diseased, he’d believe them with every fiber in his body. He’d embrace it, so then he’d have an excuse for as to why he was not right in the head. Had an excuse for Indigo and Fanta too, because this disease he had was highly contagious. One wrong move and you got it, too. No cure, no fix, no remedy, no nothing.

Where’s mom when you need her?

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Him. Him. Him. As much as Indigo tried she couldn't break the word down than the three individual letters that made it a word. She couldn't take two syllables from it - couldn't take two separate meanings from it. No; him was just him no matter how she looked at it. It was like finding out she had a paper cut only after she had put on the sanitizer. It wallowed in her mouth like the worst taking food but she couldn't find the will to spit it out or swallow it back down. And that hurt. She wanted to make him mean every single important man in her life that had even bothered to deal with her bullshit. It could; it really could. If they agreed to it they could all be one happy family and she wouldn't have to rip her hair from the roots to try and make him sound inclusive of both of them. She could break it down further than just the three letters H, I and M. It could mean Fanta and Iggy - it could mean both of them and her happy and joyful without a worry in the world of anyone being excluded from the glee. But they had to agree because she didn't want to hurt either of them; she didn't want to make the trio a duo plus one. It was always the third wheel that ended up with a broken heart. Always. She knew that, she'd been there. Whenever she saw Iggy or Fanta with someone that wasn't her or when they did things together without her she felt her heart crack just a little. It was physical just as much as it was emotional because she couldn't even find it in her to get out of her bed and chase after them. She'd just lie there curled up into a ball with a soft hand stroking at her hair telling her that everything would be alright.

Nothing would ever be alright anymore because her heart was split into two roads and she couldn't decide which one she wanted to take. A life with Fanta and she'd have to share him with everyone else he pined after - she was a greedy person. A life with Iggy and she'd have someone all to herself but left everyone else behind. Both; she wanted both. She wanted to be the most selfish person in the trio and have both of them wrapped around her fingers. She wanted Fanta but he could have who he wanted and she wanted Iggy so that there would be someone to be by her side. "Yuh' can't." He was right. Indigo couldn't have both of her best friends in some twisted polygamist relationship because that would never work. Then she realized that he couldn't even begin to think that she wanted all three of them together and her mind raced to keep up with her jet lagged thoughts. She couldn't. She can't. The only way that could make sense to her was that Fanta was excluding the fact that it was him. He thought Indigo loved Iggy. She did. She didn't.

"You've go' it wrong." She inched back just enough that she could look at his face and smile without the happiness behind it. "I can't. You're right. I fucking can't and that bothers me." Indigo shut her eyes and laughed - actually laughed because the stupidity of the whole situation was making her high. Her hands lifted and she pulled herself up so that she was eye to eye with her best friend and cupped his face gently between her hands. "I can't. That's right. I can't. But I could. That can't could be a can if we really wanted to. We. We could be together. We could be happy forever and ever lacking rules and regulations. We could make that happen - we could make it reality instead of dream." Indigo felt the sadness in her eyes fall soft and tender like she wanted to make the whole world happy. "All of us. Together. We could. We could," she continued. Tears; she felt tears. Indigo never cried but she felt tears welling in her eyes. "We could." She touched her lips to Fanta's so softly it felt like it had barely happened. "I love you. I love Iggy. We could all be happy - together. We could make it work simply based on the overlaying term that we all love each other."

Indigo dropped her face onto his shoulder and let tears fall. She loved them both and she wanted them both so badly she didn't even know what she could possibly do about it but leave. It terrified her to think about it but she knew to solve the problem of no one being left behind she had to offer herself to be the one to take the fall for the rest of them. Fanta and Iggy could make it without her because she was like a catalyst for horrible things. She wanted someone to admit it. "Fan, tell me you hate me. Tell me that I'm a big fuck up and ruin everything. I don't care if you have to lie but tell me - in the most believable voice possible - that I'm a horrible person for feeling this way." Because she needed to hear it - to fix it. "Tell me that I'm a horrible person and that you'll hate me forever unless I change," she repeated to get the point across to always understanding Fanta.

Daddy said I'd grow up sad. I think he lied.

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Usually, Fanta wanted laced ribs, rosemary hips, and elegant femininity; hourglass outlines. Rough shapes pressing calloused palms against his chest—two different things he would love, he could love. He knew she was afraid to look down, so look up. His fingers were still holding on, and he would sell his words to make it happen. To make her happy. The Newfoundlanders' tired eyes didn't want to open anymore, he found it hard enough to look down at this creature he held so tightly against his chest—screaming: I want, I want, I need this. It's the abstract thoughts that kill you, you know? He didn't like to say "you", you know, he didn't like to say “them". “Us” and “I” were choking down his throat at the sound of “him.” He was all stubble and long legs and hands like the moon, and her bruises fit his finger prints like a glove. She was telling him that the rules didn't apply to them, if only they hoped for greater things. Bile gathered its' way just below his oesophagus, threatened to spill with every easing second wasted holding each other. Honestly, no moment was wasted holding each other—but y'know, this was different. Circumstances were different. He wasn't holding her so much as he was holding something dangerous, something that wanted to upset the balance of Iggy, Fanta, Indigo.

She called him a canary, and bit curses through his skin until he sang for her in the cold. She knew she had that effect on him, even if they were exclusively friends. Sometimes, she was iron and steel and crouched over him like a cage, but more often than not, she was the reckless girl on the ground with stones in her hands, waiting to knock him out of the sky. Just to see him again, just to see. Indigo wasn't just friends with you. If anything, she owned and coddled and loved you, if you fit into her world. Sometimes, she was too much when all he wanted was simplicity. But when he thought of the world like that, he knew he couldn't live it any other way. Without Indigo, he wasn't Fanta. Without Iggy, he wasn't Fanta. Without them, he was little more than the lonely puddle strewn across the hardwood floor. Selfishness ebbed through his veins just as easily as alcohol did; it was in his blood to hound the things he wanted, desperately. His heart was on a leash, pinned to the lapel of his shirt—waiting for someone to pick up the slack, pull him away for his own good. There was no place he'd rather be. Hunkering his shoulders, Fanta's head slumped forward to hide the slight quiver of his chin.

Indigo wriggled in his arms, moving a few breadths away until he looked at her. A familiar smile played on her lips—and damn, he was glad to see it—, she was alright. Some irrational part of him thought she was going to end up in the hospital, where both he and Iggy and Mia would take turns holding her hand. It was ridiculous to think that, Indigo always made it out of the fire unscathed. A look of hurt flashed across his face, and he immediately regretted it. He dropped his hand to his side again, clenched it into a fist for a second. But she's stubborn. She always was. When she reached out to cup his face, Fanta didn't flinch away but instead, pressed his cheek against her soft fingers—eyes closed for a moment, opening to meet her violet ones. As much as he didn't want to say it, he would have said: hey, I'll move out of the way for you... and I'll move out of the way for him too; for her, he would do it. Indigo's laugh caused his eyebrows to screw up, causing stray creases on his forehead. Fanta only stared, trying to dissect the situation so that it made sense to him. Had he been reading the cards all wrong? “We?” His voice was slick, smooth and solid—something out of a movie, something that didn't shake like he felt he was—and he licked his lips, arching an eyebrow. Asking silent questions that weren't being answered. “Indigo—... yuh' just said,” Fanta began lamely, faltering.

All of us. Together. We could. We could. What was she talking about again? Hadn't Indigo just said that she loved him? Him being Iggy? Realization hit him as hard as a truck, sent him reeling. This was her winter song to them, on the eve of Christmas. Even if it was brought on from a drunken slur, whether or not she'd remember this in the morning was another matter. But he would. He'd remember all of this and reflect on it, even if they didn't speak a word of it the next morning. Even if he had to pretend it never happened. Tears welled in Indigo's eyes, it was enough to cause Fanta's heart to swell painfully. Then, soft lips greeted his in a sweeter kiss than he deserved. Sweet kisses were reserved for sweet boys like Iggy, not ruined train-wrecks like Fanta. Then, it was finished. Indigo breathed the last words inches from his mouth, whispered so quietly he wondered whether or not he'd imagined it in his shocked stupor. First thought: What about Iggy? Yes, Iggy was involved in this proposed polygamous relationship—but no, it couldn't be. Iggy loved Indigo, not him. Impossible. His farm hands found her slender shoulders and he held her in front of him, thumbs tensing against her collarbone. Even his eyes were welling with tears. He pressed the heel of his palm to one of his eyes and chuckled softly; though it sounded more like an exhaled breath than anything else. “I dun' wanna say it, Indi. I hate this. We're horrible people,” He finally said, shaking his head. It was only when his smile eased into a sad frown that he spoke again, “Iggy loves yuh'. It can't work, y'know that, righ' darling? It canni' be right.”

And I wonder, I wonder.

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He had an aerial view of the world crumbling to pieces - was above the flames that licked at sore flesh. Mia didn't understand it; not one bit. Not that he could ever understand because wasn't an Iggy or a Fanta and he definitely wasn't any Indigo. He was soft, supple little Mia with the blue hair and the innocent face who liked to pull people to the dark side with him because he hated to go alone. Mia could understand the selfishness of situations such as these when all one wanted was for things to go their way to avoid the pain that was sure to come along with the consequence. All humans were naturally brutish, nasty, selfish and mean according to Thomas Hobbes. A great philosopher who saw humanity for what it truly was. One could remain their in natural state or could fight against it as they grew older and most had a hard time with with. Mia was the boy with the match in his hand staring at the forest innocently until the spark in time when he decided to burn it down. Time was being lost. Tick tock. Tick tock. When would he decide to burn the whole place down?

Not yet because he had to help someone mend something he forgot he had because it had withdrawn into the deepest parts of his mind. Forgotten, forgotten. All it did was beat and beat and beat but there was nothing more than that. It had left when his parents had left and it died when his parents died. No way to bring it back but the slow disintegration towards lighting that match and tossing it into the trees. Burn. Would there be adrenaline when his little hand turned into wing so he could watch the charring of something so beautiful. Again. Again. Over and over because Iggy was going to be there to watch it. So was Indigo and Fanta. Indigo. He wondered if Indigo would fly with him watching the catastrophe and maybe just maybe they'd be there to soaring on incandescent wings.

Mia paused when they hit outside and stuffed his hands into his pockets finger tips of his right hand hitting a box Indigo had stuffed into them before she'd left. "Just in case you get lonely and want to think of me." It was a sick twisted joke that she thought cigarettes would remind him of her when she was always on his mind but it was the thought that counted. She was a fragile little thing with the confidence of a mad dog that barked without aggression. To notice her was to look at the the sun for the first time; blinding, powerful but far away. He sighed and moved so that he was next to the red head and pulled the pack from his pocket and offered it. "Indigo gave them to me earlier," he muttered waiting.

Waiting for what? For the brick to fall? For the tears to run? For the words that couldn't be said to be blurted out like they were the last ones on the planet? Mia was waiting for Iggy and for whatever Iggy was waiting for. He'd be the person who braced against the wind and grasped onto the sword with paper hands. It was him. It was who his mother had raised him to be and his only attachment to the person who'd disappeared. Sick. Sick, sick, sick. He hadn't meant to turn into something opposite of what he had been so many months ago before the accident and before he'd met Indigo who's dragged him to things he had forgotten existed.

"Just a fragile little boy with the power to hold up the cold stone roof."

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"Indigo’s, huh?" He murmured.

Iggy's mouth twisted into something that could've been a cringe. Cigarettes had never seemed so appealing and disgusting at the same time.

He took a cigarette from the carton, holding it loosely between his index finger and thumb. He let himself think for a moment about how it’d feel if Indigo and him were together. What it’d be like to hold her, to have her. To be able to point her out from the crowd and say, “That’s her,” with a voice his mom used when she talked to people about his father. Iggy loved that voice, especially when it was directed at him. He liked it when his mom talked to her friends about him. His mom never had anything but nice things to say. He loved her dearly, but being as selfish as he as, he knew it wouldn’t be enough coming from his mom. Ever since he had met Indigo and Fanta, he knew it’d never be enough. Not if Fanta and Indigo were still stuck in his subconscious.

Iggy cocked his head back and watched his breath as he exhaled slowly, blinking whenever a snowflake landed on his eyelashes. The funny part of it was is that he didn’t even mind anymore. Not at the moment, anyway. He felt a little carefree standing there with Mia, watching the snow fall. Only Iggy wasn’t watching anymore. He was still thinking about Indigo. When was he not thinking about Indigo?

Indigo was always in his thoughts, as was Fanta. Only Fanta wasn’t as demanding as Indigo. Whenever he thought about Fanta, it was just Fanta. Fanta was.. Fanta. Iggy couldn’t even put a word on him. He couldn’t put a word on Indigo either, but it wasn’t because there wasn’t a word for Indigo like it was for Fanta, but because there was just too many.

“Think everyone’s left by now?” he asked, rubbing his eyes with the palm of his hands.

Think maybe I could go back in?

Iggy reached into his back pocket, glad he at least had a lighter on him, and lit his cigarette. The snow reminded him of one particular date he had had with one of his mother’s friend’s daughters. It was a fine date, but he knew that’s all it was. A date. In fact, he had only accepted to go along with it because his mother had asked him. Her name was Marie, a fine broad. The only reason he remembered her in the first place was because of one particular thing she had said.

She had said, “You’re a man in full, Iggy.”

She had this smile on her face, like she actually meant it, like she knew what she was talking about. Which would have been in impossible, because she obviously had no idea what she was saying. All Iggy could remember thinking was, what a funny thing to say, because Iggy was no where close to being the man she thought he was. Sure, he pulled out her chair and opened a couple of doors for her, but the thing she didn’t know was that their entire date was filled with nothing but thoughts of Fanta.

“Hey, Mia?”

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Indigo was a child with the attention span of a goldfish for as soon as the words left her lips the stain of lie left her tasting blood on her tongue. She'd bitten through it in her haste to cut off - to stop the arrow from leaving the bow. Of course. Of course what she had said was stupid and ill thought out because no one could ever love her let alone like her. She was a destructive force with the rose petal lips and the voice that made loads of people melt. British, she'd never understood the fascination people from the West end of the globe had with it. Indigo would speak to men and she knew they'd be glazing over her words and listening merely to the tone and she'd abuse that. She would take them by the hand and lead them to her room and whisper things in their ears so they could do nothing but obey. Tear them apart with her words and leave them a shell of what they once were - she'd just gather up her things and leave without so much as a goodbye. It had become a force of habit until she met Iggy and Fanta and she was suddenly a child with the slingshot back in her old house with the pile of rocks by her feet and her father murmuring that she had to shoot the bad birds down. "But Daddy, I'll hurt it." Grew up to be an assassin of things that she deemed wrong and unhealthy; Iggy and Fanta were healthy. But she was going to shoot them down anyway.

We're horrible people. She was a horrible person. Indigo was the kid with the weapon shooting down all the pretty birds because Daddy told her she wanted a better look. There was the wind in her hair and the sun on her back and the Y shaped gun in her hand. "I want to see the birdy Daddy. How do I get it to come here?" Destroy it and it will come. Wound it and it has no choice but to seek comfort from the one who administered the wound. Indigo wanted to cut herself so deeply into her best friends that they wouldn't be able to live without her around. She knew it was sick, twisted and plain wrong because they didn't deserve it but Daddy said she had to. "Will it be mad at me for hurting it Daddy?" All she had to do was aim and with the guilt chewing a hole in her heart pull the elastic band back and fire the little black rock. They'd come tumbling down and she'd nurse them back to health; care for them, love them and they'd never be able to let her go. It made her hands shake that Iggy loved her - she'd cut in too deep.

"Dun.... Dun say that. I know, a'right? I know." Guilty. "'M jus.... 'M jus gonna go yea?" she muttered. Being around them made her greedy, made her want to carve in a little deeper and stick her finger into the wound. "Daddy, is it going to fly again?" If she let them go they would beat their wings again but they wouldn't fly for she always had that string around their feet. She didn't want them to go because then she'd be alone so she'd set them down and walk way so it wouldn't hurt as much. Indigo could take the blame. "I walked away and it wasn't there any more. I want another one Daddy. I'm lonely." Even if she left them she would find others - claim them - tame them - cut herself into them - leave them. Repeat. Always, always. Because of a slingshot and some birds who gleamed bright yellow. Indigo pushed herself into a seated position and slid off the bed. "'M gunna go fin' Iggy. Tell 'im 'M gunna 'ead 'ome." Still half drunk her words came out more cockney than the normal smooth British flow they usually had.

Where was her Daddy when she needed him? Where was he when she needed someone to hold her hands steady when she pulled the band back? When she needed him to pull her away from the bird she so badly wanted to keep next to her? Wasn't that what Mudz was for? He replaced all the pretty birds and broken wings on those days when she needed someone to pull close. Indigo pressed the heels of her hands to her eyes. Spots flashed in neon colours but she didn't let up - even when she felt the vertigo in her head. She was a disease. "God 'M such a bad person. I-I jus fook up everyfing dun I?" she stated with a shaky laugh. "Fly. Fly. Hurry up and fly so I don't have to worry about you any more. You're free little bird." She missed Tristan.

"Smooth as an arrow you can kill it so it never leaves."

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Character Portrait: Fanta Idlewilde
0 sightings Fanta Idlewilde played by Yonbibuns
"Please, don't make my feel good go away."

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View All » Add Character » 13 Characters to follow in this universe

Character Portrait: Amelie Recoren
Character Portrait: Indigo Selina Meath
Character Portrait: Iggy Johnson
Character Portrait: Fray Summers
Character Portrait: Sno Luvllaby
Character Portrait: Aquroya Heartnett
Character Portrait: Engel Mia Blau Himmel

Newest

Character Portrait: Engel Mia Blau Himmel
Engel Mia Blau Himmel

"Do You See, How The Wind In Your Hair Now Feels Differently?"

Character Portrait: Aquroya Heartnett
Aquroya Heartnett

"If the sky were crying for you, I'd turn into a sea and embrace it."

Character Portrait: Sno Luvllaby
Sno Luvllaby

Just go with it ok C:

Character Portrait: Fray Summers
Fray Summers

Close your eyes and melt away

Character Portrait: Iggy Johnson
Iggy Johnson

My dreams, they've got to kiss, because I don't get sleep, no..

Character Portrait: Indigo Selina Meath
Indigo Selina Meath

"I Faked The Feeling To Get The Rush. It Didn't Work And So I Went Out For More."

Character Portrait: Amelie Recoren
Amelie Recoren

A yellow envelope with a few tears.

Trending

Character Portrait: Sno Luvllaby
Sno Luvllaby

Just go with it ok C:

Character Portrait: Aquroya Heartnett
Aquroya Heartnett

"If the sky were crying for you, I'd turn into a sea and embrace it."

Character Portrait: Fray Summers
Fray Summers

Close your eyes and melt away

Character Portrait: Amelie Recoren
Amelie Recoren

A yellow envelope with a few tears.

Character Portrait: Iggy Johnson
Iggy Johnson

My dreams, they've got to kiss, because I don't get sleep, no..

Character Portrait: Engel Mia Blau Himmel
Engel Mia Blau Himmel

"Do You See, How The Wind In Your Hair Now Feels Differently?"

Character Portrait: Indigo Selina Meath
Indigo Selina Meath

"I Faked The Feeling To Get The Rush. It Didn't Work And So I Went Out For More."

Most Followed

Character Portrait: Indigo Selina Meath
Indigo Selina Meath

"I Faked The Feeling To Get The Rush. It Didn't Work And So I Went Out For More."

Character Portrait: Sno Luvllaby
Sno Luvllaby

Just go with it ok C:

Character Portrait: Iggy Johnson
Iggy Johnson

My dreams, they've got to kiss, because I don't get sleep, no..

Character Portrait: Aquroya Heartnett
Aquroya Heartnett

"If the sky were crying for you, I'd turn into a sea and embrace it."

Character Portrait: Fray Summers
Fray Summers

Close your eyes and melt away

Character Portrait: Amelie Recoren
Amelie Recoren

A yellow envelope with a few tears.

Character Portrait: Engel Mia Blau Himmel
Engel Mia Blau Himmel

"Do You See, How The Wind In Your Hair Now Feels Differently?"


Fullscreen Chat » Create Topic » Ephemeral Pleasures: Out of Character

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Most recent OOC posts in Ephemeral Pleasures

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

xD of course of course. I'll probably make a post soon, but I was wondering if you guys would help me start up my roleplay I created :D

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

@Anexia: Boo! At least you've returned.... I was waiting for someone else, and she totally crapped out on me, so I kind of made the executive desicion that Aquroya's passed out at the table after drinking whatever it was the Fanta gave him. Peach something. I don't even remember. Soooo.... You could always help me out in getting back in by awakening Sleeping Clumbsy/Featherweight/Shouta. I miss this, but it's been way too awkward to just jump back in while my loves are busy creating their polygamous relationship without me.

But that's okay, because we kind of have our own polygamous relationship outside of role-play, sooo.... Meesh.

@Honey, Lover, Juicey: I EFFIN' LOVE YOU ALL!. I never get tired of saying that. Nor do I think it's possible to wear those words out. At least not toward you three. Yeah, I'll still kinda half-way creeping this.... Like... lurking in the shadows. I just can't bring myself to leave, because this is kind of like... sacred ground, where the four of us actually got to know eachother. I know I met Juicey through my first RPG written on here ever... and then I was invited here, and overwhelmed by it, and scared of Anah for God knows how long. Wow, no. I have to stop. No more 5AM posting. I always say it, but I'll do it again; I know it....

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

I promise I'll post to this tomorrow, since it's my day off, and my brain will restart. Reload. Reformat. Yeeeeeees. xXx does sound sexy, almost dirty. Naughty. Ho hum. I love ya'll and you're characters, too!

- swigs - Yar har har har, happy Saint Patty's day!

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

Oh wow Umm it's gonna be so hard to bring Fray and Sno back in Lol. Is it possible that one of you just calls them over, I think that I'll make them siblings, it's easier that way. And yes XxX is sexy :D uber sexy xD

btw those three would be such an amusing couple.

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

I can help with the whole.... Summary thing XxX. (it's a sexy name)

So basically after you left Indigo invited her friend Mia to join the party and soon afterwards got drunk. During this time Iggy was drunk and admit to being in love with Indigo and Fanta took him to talk about it in private. While they were talking Indigo passed out and Mia went to go get help from Iggy and Fanta. Fanta picked her up and carried her to the room while Iggy and Mia remained behind. Iggy then got a glass of water for Indigo and it's soon after he leaves that she wakes up. She admits to Fanta that 'she loves him' even though she herself doesn't even know who 'he' is. At the same time Mia is trying his best to comfort Iggy who offers them to go out for a smoke which Mia accepts because he wants to help Iggy get better. While they leave Indigo tells Fanta that she wishes the three of them -Iggy, Fanta and Indigo - could be in a polygamist relationship and be happy altogether.

That's the basis of what has happened so far. It's not much but when you read the posts (if you do) you'll see that it's super emo and depressing. Sigh.

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

:D i'd love to jump back in, I enjoyed this roleplay so much and was very sad I had to leave. I feel back at home now lol. and summary would be nice Juicebox. btw Lozer, great name xD just, incredible lol.

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

Oh indeed there is. Indeed there is.

God, I kinda want the emo fest to end as well. Warmth and cuddles of love would be very nice right now. I mean, yes. It would. I SEND YOU LOVE ALL THE TIME YONIBONI! I'm always sending you love through the air and through the window I'm breathing on heavily. All the time. I am always fueling love to you. I love ya JuiceyBox. And you XXX. I named you.

It IS! We should have that work. That should be the goal. I declare it. Yum.

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And there's a party in Fanta's pants! Kufufufufu.

Just kidding. Not really. It's pretty much an emo fest right now, I think I'm going to break it up soon. I mean, the night's gotta last so long right. There needs to be some warmth and cuddles and love somewhere, isn't it Christmas Eve? I'll post tomorrow, I failed at the "post-everywhere" goal, it didn't work. You guys' weren't fueling enough love in my direction. I love you guys. A lot. I love you, too, Nexia.

Polygamy is yummy. Juiceyjuiceyjuicey, comeee fly with me, come fly come fly away.

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

Ah! Hey there. Good to hear you've been doing better. :)

And yeah, pretty much everyone left except Lozer, Honey, and Nathan. (And me.) You could pop back on in if you'd like, though. :) I could summarize what happened, because a round about way to put it is that everyone is being little emos, and this jacked up love triangle began.

..yet its all still lovable.

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

Pretty good actually, I recovered from everything so I'm back now! :D I entered a few serious roleplays other then such I'm just surfing. I actually made a pretty good roleplay C: Is everyone still playing or did a few drop out hmm?

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

Yesh we remember you. And yesh, we kept it going through sheer will power and the fucked up nature of the three of them. Ahh, the fun to be had.

How've you been?

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Wow the roleplay is still going! *peaks in* remember me?

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Oh shit. I should make it some random guy from Wal Mart. Named Marco. Mmm. Marco. He sounds really hot. And he'd be the manager. Yesssssss.

Aww. Well now you know hun.

I dunno who to make it. I don't want to make it anyone just for the sake of NOT having to decide. Like damnit it's hard. I don't want to hurt Iggy but I don't want to go with the obvious. MAN! Screw being a girl. I wanna be a guy.

Well, maybe. But no. I'll know what it is if we do, do a thing about last November. It'll be fun.

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

Yoni: Oh, yes. We shall absolutely do that. ;)
And hah! That would be funny if Indigo ended up being in love with some kid no one even knew about. Steve from Walmart. Woo.
I love Iggy, too. He's too cute. I wanna eat him up. <3 But not as much as Fanta. Fanta needs a whole 'nother definition for sexy.

Wanna know whats sad? I had to look up polygramy because I didnt know what it meant. I was so lost..

Indigo: D'aw. Make it.. FANTA! No wait, I change my mind. Don't tell me. I want to be surprised. But can I guess what she went to rehab for? Toilet paper disorder. Bam. Mind reader right here.

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

We could. That would also be back when Indigo didn't love anyone and she hadn't met Mia. It would be so wonderful and perfect and was deeper in shit than Iggy and Fanta ever knew. (She secretly went to rehab while they didn't know but for what?!)

The polygamy thing would be so perfect because than Indigo wouldn't have to choose who she loves and they could all be happy and they could have Mia and it would be a wonderful smex sandwich that makes everyone happy.

Mmmmm.

That would be so delicious.

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

Honestly, I don't even know who I want Indigo to be with. I'm with her on the polyamory thing. I think Iggy, Fanta and Indigo should all be in this dysfunctional relationship with each other, because Fanta can't deal with not having Iggy as well. He's not the type of guy to settle down with just one person and he's kind of been acting like the in between for both of them. So, I vote for Polyamory! Kufufufu. Smex sandwich, that would be.

We could also invite Mia, because he's completely adorable. Fanta is smexy. And the more I read about Iggy's thought process, the more I fall in love with him. Just so you know.

WHO IS HE?

Indigo: -brings out random guy- ... STFU!
Iggy: :(
Fanta: :(
Mia: :(

On a side-note: Perhaps on Lozey's forum we can go more in depth about Iggy and Fanta's last November? Hurr hurr. Curse you anime for making me want boy on boy love!

Re: [OOC] Ephemeral Pleasures

Hey, Indigo is so messed up I think she loves all of them just the same. She'd be willing to just leave in order to not have to try and distinguish who it is.

At first I was planning to have it be Fanta because he's sex on legs but I dunno. I think I have the idea but the more I read the more I don't want to make Iggy more upset but the more I don't want to go with the better choice. It's fucking up my thought process. DAMN YOU ALL!

Yes Yoni; thank you.

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ANAH! You must tell me who she loves! I'm dying in suspense here. I wanna know~ ( Im secretly hoping its Fanta, because I would love to express Iggy's hurt, and also because I just think Fanta's sexy. ) Even if he is a character, and of course, made by none other than Yoni. - hugs Yoni - Thank you for Fanta. He is.. too sexy.

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OH MI GOD I'M SO EXCITED.

Shit. My job's been eating my brain and life, accompanied by the flu. I've been sleeping, working, repeat. It's gross and it makes me miss you guys, so I'm going to make an effort to stay awake long enough for me to come here and post. And work on my characters for Lozey's super sexy forum made for sexy people.

-throws love around-

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Okay you three sexy people who keep replying to this just as sporadically as I do because we have issues and problems and writer's blocks and tiredness and shit. Anyway; not why I decided to finally post OOC after how many weeks or months of not doing it. I HAVE BIG NEWS FOR US FOUR SEXY PEOPLE!!!!

I made a forum for us to RP on and to invite other people who are good and willing to deal with our sporadic, unpredictable, spread out posting. Soooo, if ya'll want it and want to join cause it's hot PM me and I'll send ya the website.

ONLY COOL PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED TO JOIN. And who are patient and willing to check on the RP everyday if they are with us.

Yea.

That will be all.