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filertextThey say an end can be a start
Feels like I've been buried yet I'm still alive
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- ♦ NAME⋮ X Samuel Jordan Foxworthy
♢ ALIAS⋮ X Jordan Fox / Jordan or
♦ OCCUPATION⋮ X Rent Boy
♢ AGE⋮ X 19
♦ ETHNICITY⋮ X Caucasian
♢ SEXUALITY⋮ X Bisexual
♦ EYE COLOR⋮ X Blue
♢ HAIR COLOR⋮ X Platinum Blonde (Dyed)
♦ HEIGHT⋮ X 6'2"
♢ WEIGHT⋮ X 150lbs
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WORDSWORDSWORDS♦♢♦♢♦ It's like a bad day that never ends
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He does not lack selfish whim, in fact, most his being can be summed up as selfishly distancing himself from the idea of being hurt. A smart guy that dumbs himself down and pretends to be happy even when all he wants to do is curl up and die. He will do anything, and everything to distance himself from who he was taught to be as a child. His life laid out step by step since the moment he was born. He did not dodge that bullet without damage to himself. At a young age he had been expected to uphold a certain set of values, always be the best, and never let the unworthy into his life. Get the best grades, dress the best, and never let them see you at a disadvantage. If he so much as stepped out of line, for any reason at all it ended in swift punishment meant to ensure it never happened again. His family the type to hold grudges long after the fact.
Gave him quite a complex as a child, stripping him of any confidence he may have had there for a while. Considering the constant, near maddening teasing he endured on a daily basis. Sometimes he continues to present a haughty attitude, and can seemingly act superior to those around him. Unfortunate things that haunt him into adulthood, despite trying his best to shake it all off. Alcohol proved to be a great friend in the long run, and the sheer amount of nights he spent drinking alone changed him for the worst in a way that has only just begun to rear its head in the aftermath of halting his addictions. Feigned cheer, where insecurity takes hold. Often confidence turned Self-doubt turned a thousand pills to control the awakening thoughts of self destruction in his head.
Ask him, and he has no problems to speak of. Addictions simply do not exist in his world. Even when staring him in the face. As long as he has been at Hales he has exhibited a much lighter attitude, though in the nights when he leaves for a job he often comes back a little…less. Darker, more snappish. Flaring temper, low but burning all the same. Suggesting Drugs, of course, but he’d never admit to it. In this state of mind its easy to see him for what he is. A deep depression settled into the places where blinding charm attempts to live. His denial is only worsened by the fact that he won't let anybody help him, even if it could keep him from an early grave.
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♦ Mornings ♦ Social Events (Parties) ♦ The Lounge ♦ Drinking ♦ Cold Weather ♦ Distractions From Himself ♦ Children ♦ Friendly People ♦
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♢ His Family ♢ Thinking Of The Future ♢ Being Mocked ♢ Bitter Drinks ♢ Hot Weather ♢ Most Animals ♢ Reading ♢ Being Distrusting ♢ Hurting Other People ♢ Mirrors ♢
WORDWORS♦♢♦♢♦ A thing I don't try to deny
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♦ Nail Biting ♢ Finger Drumming ♦ Fidgeting ♢ Underage Drinking ♦ Chewing Gum ♢ Cracking Knuckles/Neck ♦Pill Popping ♢ Social Smoking ♦ Staying Up Late ♢ Interrupting People Mid Sentence
♦ Intelligence ; While Jordan does dumb himself down to fit a certain image he is actually quite smart, having graduated with top grades in his class, and he had been on the Yale waiting list for a Law Degree.
♢ Flexible ; In more ways than one.
♦ Musically Inclined ; Playing a classical instrument (Piano & Violin) had been one of the things required of him, he doesn't hate it. But he also does not often put this talent to any sort of use. He can sing, to some extent, though not in a professional manner.
♢ Acting ; Or, it could also be seen as a form of deception. He is quite talented when it comes to hiding behind a persona, keeping Jordan Fox separate from Samuel Foxworthy.
♦ Avoidance ; He will go out of his way to ignore a person/situation that stresses him out or otherwise would cause bouts of anxiety to flare up.
♢ Anxious ; Without having any discernible reason or cause he can get quite anxious, often followed by bodily signs of said anxiety (tapping, nail biting, etc.)
♦ Overly Cheerful ; In a bid to act as happy as possible he can come off as overbearingly, or sickeningly cheerful.
♢Trusting ; He can be entirely too trustful of people, of course, this often has lead to him being hurt.
♦ Hemophobia ; Known as the fear of blood, he tends to get dizzy or faint at the sight of it.
♢ Becoming Like His Family ; He fears the day he will look in the mirror and see the people who raised him staring back.
♦ Losing himself completely ; He is afraid of losing what little control over himself and his life that he has.
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Didn't matter what he wanted though, in that family there was only one way. Follow every single rule and direction laid out for him. Every single on of his siblings followed the plans laid out for them. His eldest brother spent years at college, working for a profession he didn't want nor care for. His sister, driven to madness by the strict rules imposed upon them. Every child in between swept up in the sea of expectation. Samuel did not have a childhood, as far as a traditional one goes. From the moment he could start learning he did, he had a private teacher in kindergarten and from then on he was expected to be the best in class. Forced to dress a certain way and act in a well mannered way. He could not make unapproved friends, even when he attended a private school where children were usually just as wealthy as himself.
As he grew he began to realize that he was not truly living. A prisoner in his own home. Two of his siblings had already been cut from the will when they could not uphold their duties as a part of the family, and while Samuel feared that he knew it was the only way to freedom. He had kept in contact with his siblings, his older sister a nurse living in Chicago with a couple of roommates. He asked to live with her, but at the time he was only fourteen, too young to up and disappear from home. She had told him no, but that she would reconsider once he turned eighteen. He accepted that for what it was, and continued on with the lie that was his life. He drove himself to near insanity to be the very best, ending up achieving the highest grades in his class. His parents had pushed him towards law school, as having a lawyer in the family would be a good asset. However, he got wait listed, spurring his parents into a rage.
He hit eighteen a week after graduation. Called his sister and went on his merry way to Chicago, before his parents ever had a say in it. He still keeps in contact, even if its through crude letters and the occasional angry phone call. Now, you'd think a kid that was as well off and as intelligent as he is would have had no problem finding work. But truth is, by the time he got somewhere to relax all he wanted to do was live out the years he missed. Parties, and friends, and drugs galore. Alcohol one of his main escapes from himself. He found Hales a few months after moving in with his sister. They had a strained relationship and he knew that the sooner he was out the better. And Hales offered him a unique experience, if not a little - different - from what he should have been doing with his life. Besides, money was money, no matter where it came from. And quickly he found that he didn't mind how he got it - it became fun. He could have left at any point, but somewhere along the way he decided that he wouldn't survive anywhere else.
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WORDWORS♦♢♦♢♦ There are things in my life that I can't control
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FACE CLAIM ; Lucky Blue Smith
PLAYED BY ; J.D.
CS CREATED BY ; Verix