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Guenhwyvar Derozxik

"If it's hostile, you kill it-gun spirits will do that to you."

0 · 442 views · located in The Infinite Void

a character in “The Multiverse”, originally authored by Guest, as played by Nevermore90

Description

Guenhwyvar Derozxik is cute in the you-might-think-about-it-but-realize-he-probably-plays-Dunegons-and-Dragons-in-his-mother's-basement sort of way; he has a slim build that shows he neither eats nor exercises often and stands close to six foot. The duster he wears is awkward on his frame; it could size someone more than twice his width and a bit taller than himself, almost swamping himself in his own personal sea of black. The shoulders-up, at the very least, are pleasant to look at: his eyes are both kind and exceptionally naive and his short, likewise colored hair has never been found in any sort of "punk" or "rocker" style. The way he sees it is rather accurate: only the inarticulate vermin of the underside of the animal that is Existence would fashion themselves so.
Going a slot down is his aforementioned duster, under which resides a simple t-shirt of varying design and style. Lower than that are cargo pants that (usually) match the rest of his clothes, along with the variety of shoes that he wears.

(Get the following at awesomeness!)
Character's Full Name: Guenhwyvar Derozxik
Reason or meaning of name: Exceptionally unusual family.
Nickname: Gearhead
Reason for nickname: Comes with being a Junker.

Birthdate: Feb/02/22yrsago?d
Astrological Sign: Pisces



PHYSICAL APPEARANCE

Age 19
Appears eighteen to twenty.
Eye Color: Brown
Glasses or contacts? Y/[N]
Hair color: Brown
Distinguishable hair feature (bald, receding hairline, etc.): Y/[N]
Type of hair (coarse, fine, thick, etc?) Silky
Typical hairstyle: He lets it fall how it falls.

Height: Five foot eight
Weight: A hundred ten pounds
Type of body/build: Slim, almost unusually so.

Nationality: Irish, American

Skin tone: Pale
Skin type: White



Distinguishing Marks? Y/[N]
Scars? A mostly-healed line that runs vertically from just under his armpit to halfway-down to the hip on his right-side; this came from a building accident.
Most predominant feature: His eyes
Resembles (famous or not): Azrael Valicalzero

Accent? To any foreigner, "American" could be an accent, but he can slip into sounding like 'e's from 'ye-old Ireland.

Is s/he healthy? [Y]/N
If not, why not: N/A

Physical disabilities: N/A
Physical abilities (what is character good at? sports, etc.): "Hand-eye coordination is for Jocks."


OCCUPATION



Where does character work? Freelance - left The Chamber four years ago.d
How many years? Four years
Relationship with co-workers? He works alone, mostly
Like his/her job? Loves his job!
Why or why not? "It's funn'er'n'hell!"

Dream job: Being a Chamber Master

Junkers are people that have realized that any man-made object, from a shard of glass to a intergalactic battlecruiser, has a "spirit" of its own, much as Native Americans praised spirits of "water" or "wind." Either friendly or domineering, Junkers convince these spirits, floating around after the destruction of whatever they inhabited, to cobble together into their very own devices. Most Junkers are sent when they discover their abilities to The Chamber, where they become initiates and finally full-fledged Junkers, learning all sorts of technological skills that ITT-Tech could only dream of.

Junkers are broken into a few categories:

Flash Gordons: Specialize in energy weapon creation.
Brawlers: Melee weapon creation.
GunSmiths: Firearms of all kinds.
GearHeads: Vehicle repair/creation.

Every Junker is expected to be able to do anything within their resources, but most specialize in a certain field and that's it. Guenhwyvar likes to think of himself as a Jack-of-all-trades. If anything, he leans most towards being a Flash Gordon.
Spirits come in all forms, from appliance spirits (the most helpful type) to weapon spirits (the most dangerous type). Weapon spirits, willing to serve man to destroy man, can be described as "twitchy," and must have a eye kept close. Using too many too often leads to someone becoming "Tainted," a homicidal maniac that plots to build the biggest thermonuclear WMD explosive ever... It's fun :D

Personality

FAVORITES

Color: Gunmetal Grey
Music: Back-ground music, including bag pipes and light rock
Food: I can haz chezberger?
Literature: Romantic/comedy/suspense/action/adventure, either SciFi or Fantasy.
Expressions: Anything that makes someone (other than himself) look stupid.
Book: The Junkman Cometh.
Quote: "I can't break it if it doesn't work, and if I can't fix it, it's not broken."
Expletive(s) (swears): F!ddlesticks! or Frakkin (yes, that's a reference to Battlestar: Galactica)
Mode of transportation: Hover Bike/other Hover vehicle.

HABITS

Smokes: [Y]/N
What? Davidoff Magnum
How often? Not very often - perhaps two-three cigarettes a week.

Drinks: [Y]/N
What? Fregadbar
How often? Rarely

Worst bad habit? Always needing to be right

Quirks: Gun spirits kill people to serve people-they're "Twitchy," and it tends to rub off on Junkers in some... unusual ways. Don't say you weren't warned, but that's all you're going to get.



ATTITUDE

Greatest fear: Rejection
Worst thing that could happen to him/her? Losing his contact with Junker Spirits.
What single event would most throw character's life in complete turmoil? Meeting the greatest woman of his life... and her being out of his league/a lesbian/a species so back-hatted compared to humans that it would never work out/her already being married/etc.

Character is most at ease when: Alone with his thoughts and tools.
Most ill at ease when: Around a girl he likes.

Priorities: Build build build!!!

Philosophy: "If it's hostile, you kill it-Gun Spirits will do that to you. I know I don't look like much, but this here rifle will rip your truck into two on minimum setting, so just try me. I didn't come here for a fight: I came for a nice drink and to scavenge some resources. You say this here place has got monsters? HA! I can take them... but you can c-come w-with me, if you w-want... I'm not scared, just don't want anything sneaking up on me, is all. Yeah, I'll tell you what: We get what I'm looking for, and I'll build you a new plasma pistol for nothing. Sounds fair, 'eh? Lets go."

How s/he feels about self: "I may not be the best guy you'll ever meet, miss: I can't play foot ball without spraining an ankle in the first minute of the game or get pummeled into the ground. I'm not the greatest shot, and I'm sure as hell not heroic, but I thought poetry and intelligence might be good enough... so what do you say? Yeah, I figured you'd say no..."
Past failure s/he would be embarrassed to have people know about:
If granted one wish, what would it be?
Why?

Daredevil or cautious? Daredevil when he's around the feminine variety of humanity.
Same when alone? He's a witless little girl when it comes to going out of his way to stop evil or villainy. No sense in risking his neck when there isn't anything in it for himself.

Biggest regret? Not asking her out.

Biggest accomplishment: Building K9
Minor accomplishments: Anything he has built before.

Character's darkest secret:
Does anyone else know?
If yes, did character tell them?
If no, how did they find out?


PERSONALITY

Greatest source of strength in character's personality (whether s/he sees it as such or not): Guenhwyver's determination makes him a cornerstone in any given struggle or project. He' doesn't see it as a strength; he's sees anyone else as weak.

Greatest source of weakness in character's personality (whether s/he sees it as such or not): Guewnhwyver gets some pretty shaky knees when it comes to girls, which has likely been mentioned at least fiftyhundredthousandgazillion times on this profile.

Character's soft spot: Abused technology or vulnerable females
Is this soft spot obvious to others? Both are rather obvious; He talks to technology like it was alive (which it is), and if people don't pick up on that, then they're about as aware of their surroundings as a fence post (which IS aware, sometimes). As far as the girls go, it's not always apparent that he tends to respond to females more gently than males.
If not, how does character hide it? Guewnhwyver doesn't.
Biggest vulnerability: Vulnerable females; he can't ignore a plea for help.

Which of the 7 deadly sins does character fight (or give into, willingly or not)?
Pride; Guewnhwyver is a self-righteous, know-it-all prick that can't ever be wrong.
Which of the 7 virtues does your character have (or fight against)?
Does kindness count if he only shows it to certain people?


TRAITS

Optimist or pessimist? A bit of both.
Introvert or extrovert? Introvert.
Drives and motivations? Getting a date, getting something built.
Talents (hidden or not)? Can read a blueprint like nobody's business (when it's usually not his business, either).

Extremely skilled at: Building, crafting, drafting, writing, idealizing, and creating, in general.
Extremely unskilled at: Running, jumping, swimming, dodging, shooting... etc.

Good characteristics: Guenhwyvar is smart, courteous, and diligent.
Character flaws: Guenhwyvar shows the color of his stomach (yellow) a bit more often than he ought to.
Mannerisms: Talking to technology, constantly surfing some medium of internet, or brushing off his jaket.
Peculiarities: If talking to his gun like it was his girlfriend isn't peculiar, I don't know what is.


SELF-PERCEPTION

One word character would use to describe self: Titillating.
One paragraph description of how character would describe self: "I'm a genius, and I won't deny it. I'm not the best looking, most athletic, or most impressive specimen, but can you name an NFL star that can name the stars of the sky like the back of his hand or write poetry? I am like thy squiggly line, always at the center of thine eye, aren't I? I might not know the streets, but I've got a map of Wing City in my head well enough. I'll build you anything from a matchbox car to a spaceshuttle, given the proper reward, ma'am."



What does character consider best physical characteristic? I know what every other highschooler would say he looks for in a girl: b0wbs. Guenhwyvar? He likes a pretty face, sure, but he lets his considerations of a person go deeper than that: To the personality and soul of a being.
What does character consider worst physical characteristic? Horribly disfigured, maimed, bruised, mangled, and missing large chunks of body. Eww.
Are these realistic assessments? Yes.
If not, why not?
How CHARACTER thinks others perceive him/her? Guenhwyvar knows he's not the best looking person ever-well, according to himself, he isn't.
What four things would CHARACTER most like to change about self? (#1 most important, #2 second most important, etc.) #1 Be even smarter #2 Develop some social skills #3 Improve physical attributes #4 Improved looks.




If change #1 was made, would character be as happy as s/he thinks? No.
If not, why not? Ignorance is bliss.


INTERRELATION WITH OTHERS

Is character divorced? Why? No
If yes, how many times? N/A
Has character ever cheated on any signficant other? N/A
How does character relate to others? Poorly; he's got the social skills of a sack of potatoes.
How is s/he perceived by...
Strangers? "Why the hell is that crack-addict talking to that table?"
Friends? "Tell me again why the hell you're talking to that table, please."
Wife/Husband/Lover? "I'm leaving you. Have fun with your table."
Children "Daddy, is the table my brother?"
Co-workers? "Get back to work! I will NOT hire that table!"
Protagonist? "Yes yes, we all love the table. Now please leave."
Antagonist? "I WILL DESTROY THAT TABLE TROLOLOLOLOL!"
First impression character makes is: "Why the hell is that stoner talking to that table?!"
What happens to change this perception? Showing that he isn't a stoner and explaining the Junker powers.

What do family/friends like most about character? "When you need your car fixed..."
What do family/friends like least about character? "It's time to tell Grandma happy birthday. Please leave the table alone, dear."


GOALS

Immediate goal(s): Finally get a girlfriend!
Long range goal(s): Build something impressive enough to become a Chamber Master.
How does character plan to accomplish goal(s)? Trying to impress people
How will other people around character be effected? "I'm leaving you. Have fun with your table, jerk."

PROBLEMS/CRISIS

How character react in a crisis (calm/panic/etc.)? "Time to reload."
How does character face problems? "He did it, not me!"
Kinds of problems character usually runs into: People getting angry when the devices they bought from him break.
How does character react to NEW problems? Can I hover-bike past it?
How does character react to change? "No, I'm not leaving my table!"

GENERAL

Jewelry? None
Other accessories? Nope
Drives a ... : Hover Bike
Where does character live? Apartment
With anyone? Yes/[No]
Where does character want to live? Chamber Master quarters
Spending habits (frugal, spendthrift, etc)? "Why buy what I can build?"
What does s/he do too much of? Spend too much time following girls around or building stuff.
Too little of? Giving people the attention they want.
Most prized possession: K9
Why? Spiritual connection.
Play musical instrument? Yes
Which one(s)? Bag Pipes/Guitar
How did s/he learn? Tutorsoft
Does character like animals? Not particularly; tree-rats should go burn themselves.
Any pets? K9?
Likes music? Yes
What kind? Light background/techno

Person character secretly admires:
Person character was most influenced by: William Shakespeare. "I play with junk like he plays with words."

Equipment

Image A rail gun (top weapon) that is powered by eight batteries that revolve in a revolver-style cylinder. These batteries are specially made by Guenhwyvar and can only be used in his own devices. The seven not in use recharge, albeit slowly. A mechanism just forward of the cylinder attempts to recapture excess energy for a "bloom effect" of whatever is fired, let it be junk he has cobbled together or armor-piercing 7.62 ammunition. The speed at which the super magnets in the barrel "launch" the ammunition, be whatever he desires, fires it fast enough to make it deadly against anything save a demigod or some sort of super-ultra-Jesus-battletank. Hobbled junk fires in a shotgun-spray, or he can use special shot-ammunition that work like a shotgun. It has an effective range, when firing normal, "rifle" ammunition, comparable to that of a light sniper rifle. It can fire up to three-burst, but that drains the batteries a lot faster than he appreciates.

Image Ballistic fiber, lots of pockets, very basic. He hasn't managed to gather the polymers necessary to develop an anti-laser/plasma-weapon layer of protection.

Hover Bike Image Can hover over land, but that's about as technological as it gets.

Image During WWII, the Red Army made extensive use of submachine in Russia guns-perhaps more that any other army. After the war, the emergence of the Kalashnikov assault rifle led to the disappearance of submachine guns from Russian doctrine. Throughout the Cold War, no new Russian submachine gun designs emerged-but that all changed with the collapse of the Soviet Union. The growing menace of organized crime led to the widespread development of of submachine guns, primarily for law enforcement use.
The OTs-22 is one of these new submachine guns from Russia. Interestingly, it is chambered in the 9mm Parabellum, a Western caliber. This might indicate a shift toward that cartridge in Russian Doctrine, or perhaps the OTs-22 was developed for the export market.
The weapons mechanism, even after a redesign by Guenhwyer, is largely based off the Ingram's. It uses a telescoping bolt, permitting an ultracompact overall design that is balanced for one-hand use. Normally a magazine holds 30 rounds, but there is a 20-round version that fits inside the handle completely for stealth.

TECHNICAL

Owns a computer? [Yes]/No
If not, why not?
Email address(es): GreenS7oneGames@gmail.com
If more than one, each used for...?
Uses computer for business, pleasure, both? Everything-[No girlfriend...]
Play computer games? Hell yes!
If yes, which game(s)? If yes, how many hours per day? AwesomeDawn, Unicorn Attack!, any RPG ever, Oblivion, Realm of the Mad God MMORPGFNPZTM, SciFi games of any type, etc. Several hours per day; what would inspire him more?
If so, are they/it multiplayere game/s? The majority of them, yes.
Name used on each game & meaning to character? Nevermore90 :) (Edgar Allen Po, duh!)
List 4 online site(s) (URLs) visited daily?
1. Membase
2. Ragecomics
3. Lolcats
4. Stuff-to-build.com

History

BACKGROUND

Hometown: Borealis, Treniscourt.
Type of childhood: Sent of a "boarding school" early on.
First memory: Being confronted by a technology spirit.
Most important childhood event that still affects him/her: Discovering his connection to technology spirits.
Why? That's what made him the Junker that he is today.

Lower education: Elementary, up to the fourth grade.

Higher education: The Chamber of Junkers.

Booksmart or streetsmart? Booksmart, all the way.


Religion and/or religious views and/or tendencies? He's a junker; he cannot deny any sort of "spirit world," obviously, but he isn't exactly a monotheist or anything.

Firsts:

Job? Run of the mill handyman.

Kiss? Umm...

Sexual experience? N/A... let's leave it at that.

Girlfriend: A wonderful young girl named Belvia, whom he is currently dating.

FAMILY

Mother (name): Dirri Derozxik
Relationship with her: His mother is what has inspired his weakness for vulnerable women; she was never a particularly strong figure, especially not around Keveraon, who was both abusive and domineering.
Father (name): Keveraon Derozxik
Relationship with him: His father always wanted a little jock son that's come home with shiny trophies, not science fair awards. They aren't exactly a friendly father-and-son-sitcom family.
Siblings: None
Birth order: He's the eldest
Relationship with each: Only child
Children of Siblings: None
Extended family (aunts, uncles, cousins, etc.): No one important.
Close to family? Yes/[No]


CHILDREN

Does character have child(ren)? No
How many? None
Are all children with the same partner? Yes
If no, why not? If no, what is the custody arrangement? Doesn't have any
How does character relate to his/her child(ren)? He doesn't
Which child is character's favorite? Doesn't have any
Why? No girlfriend
Character's most favorite memory of his/her child(ren)? Not having one
Character's least favorite memory of his/her child(ren)? Not having one
Is relationship with children good? No, not at all. Table is better.
Is relatioinship with children important to character? Nope

Treniscourt is a post-war wasteland, Borealis being the only oasis in a vast desert of despair. In Borealis resides The Chamber, a huge collection of junkers not unlike Guenhwyver, both old and new. It's no great feat that everyone in Treniscourt would flock to Borealis; in a hundred miles, who else has medical equipment, stable housing, or working toasters? Simple answer: No one.

Grant thy wish by a summer's grace:
a kiss planted upon thy face?
Are thy lips enamored,
as my love is encumbered?

GUENHWYVAR DEROZXIK the Crafty
Male Human Artificer 20
Lawful Good
Representing Nevermore90

Strength 12 (+1)
Dexterity 14 (+2)
Constitution 12 (+1)
Intelligence 21 (+5)
Wisdom 19 (+4)
Charisma 17 (+3)
Size: Medium
Height: 5' 9"
Weight: 145 lb
Skin: Pale
Eyes: Dark Brown
Hair: Dark Brown Straight; Beardless
Total Hit Points: 83

Speed: 30 feet

Armor Rating: [30] = 10 + 10 + 10

Initiative modifier: +2 = +2 [dexterity]
Fortitude save: +7 = 6 [base] +1 [constitution]
Reflex save: +7 = 6 [base] +2 [dexterity] -1 [detached]
Will save: +19 = 12 [base] +4 [wisdom] +2 [iron will] +1 [detached]
Attack (handheld): +16/+11/+6 = 15 [base] +1 [strength]
Attack (unarmed): +16/+11/+6 = 15 [base] +1 [strength]
Attack (missile): +17/+12/+7 = 15 [base] +2 [dexterity]
Grapple check: +15/+10/+5 = 15 [base] +1 [strength] -1 [slippery]

Languages: Abyssal, Celestial, Common, Draconic, Thri-Kreen, Goblin, Sylvan, Irish Gaelic, German.

Feats:

Alertness
Diligent
Exotic Weapon Proficiency Weapon: New technology
Iron Will
Negotiator
Point Blank Shot
Far Shot
Skill Focus (Know History)
Axiomatic Heritage
Improved Outer Planar Heritage
Feeble [flaw]
Frail [flaw]
Traits:

Absent-Minded
Cautious
Detached
Skinny
Slippery
Skill Name
Key
Ability
Skill
Modifier
Ability
Modifier
Ranks
Misc.
Modifier
Appraise Int 14 =
+5
+7 +2 [diligent]
Balance Dex* 2 =
+2
+2 -2 [feeble]
Bluff Cha 6 =
+3
+3
Climb Str* 1 =
+1
+2 -2 [feeble]
Concentration Con 6 =
+1
+7 -2 [feeble]
Craft_1 Int 5 =
+5
Craft_2 Int 5 =
+5
Craft_3 Int 12 =
+5
+7
Decipher Script Int 8 =
+5
+1 +2 [diligent]
Diplomacy Cha 8 =
+3
+3 +2 [negotiator]
Disable Device Int 11 =
+5
+6
Disguise Cha 4 =
+3
+1
Escape Artist Dex* 2 =
+2
+1 -2 [feeble] +1 [skinny]
Forgery Int 6 =
+5
+1
Gather Information Cha 4.5 =
+3
+1.5
Heal Wis 5 =
+4
+1
Hide Dex* 1 =
+2
+1 -2 [feeble]
Intimidate Cha 4 =
+3
+1
Jump Str* 1 =
+1
+2 -2 [feeble]
Knowledge (arcana) Int 7 =
+5
+1 +1 [absent-minded]
Knowledge (architecture) Int 12 =
+5
+6 +1 [absent-minded]
Knowledge (dungeoneering) Int 8 =
+5
+2 +1 [absent-minded]
Knowledge (history) Int 11 =
+5
+2 +3 [skill focus] +1 [absent-minded]
Knowledge (local) Int 8 =
+5
+2 +1 [absent-minded]
Knowledge (nature) Int 8 =
+5
+2 +1 [absent-minded]
Knowledge (nobility) Int 8 =
+5
+2 +1 [absent-minded]
Knowledge (religion) Int 8 =
+5
+2 +1 [absent-minded]
Knowledge (planes) Int 11 =
+5
+5 +1 [absent-minded]
Listen Wis 10 =
+4
+5 +2 [alertness] -1 [absent-minded]
Move Silently Dex* 1 =
+2
+1 -2 [feeble]
Open Lock Dex 5 =
+2
+5 -2 [feeble]
Perform_1 Cha 6 =
+3
+3
Perform_2 Cha 6 =
+3
+3
Perform_3 Cha 3 =
+3
Perform_4 Cha 3 =
+3
Perform_5 Cha 3 =
+3
Profession Wis 9 =
+4
+5
Ride Dex 1 =
+2
+1 -2 [feeble]
Search Int 9 =
+5
+4
Sense Motive Wis 8 =
+4
+2 +2 [negotiator]
Sleight of Hand Dex* 1 =
+2
+1 -2 [feeble]
Spellcraft Int 7 =
+5
+2
Spot Wis 8 =
+4
+3 +2 [alertness] -1 [absent-minded]
Survival Wis 4 =
+4
Swim Str** 2 =
+1
+3 -2 [feeble]
Use Magic Device Cha 7 =
+3
+4
Use Rope Dex 2 =
+2
+2 -2 [feeble]
Autohypnosis Wis 9 =
+4
+3 +2 [concentration]
Knowledge
(psionics) Int 6 =
+5
+1
Repair Int 20 =
5
+15
Junker Skills Int 20 =
5
+15
* = check penalty for wearing armor

This character also has 3 ranks in Speak Languages.
Craft_3 >=5 ranks gives +2 on related appraise checks.
Know Architecture >=5 ranks gives +2 on search checks for secret doors.
Know Planes >=5 ranks gives +2 on survival checks on other planes.
Cautious trait: +1 dodge bonus on AC when fighting defensively; -1 saves vs. fear.
Slippery trait: +1 on escape artist checks against being grappled, -1 all other grapple checks.
Skinny trait: -2 on strength checks to avoid being overrun / bullrushed.

So begins...

Guenhwyvar Derozxik's Story

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik shook his head. "It's all free. You can tell it to do whatever you want. Condense!" The screens reformed back into one, making it look like one computer again.

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik shook his head. "It doesn't actually exist... like... it's hard to explain. It's the soul of a computer, not a computer. It can do anything a computer could do, from hacking to watching p-youtube. It's unrestricted and free access."

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik shook his head. "Take it. This particularly one doesn't like me very much, anyway." He wished Daniel had bolded his name to attract his attention. He turned slowly, casually bushing the switch on his rail gun to make it warm up. "No, it's like the god father of the Database."

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik didn't care to get it. "Don't worry, Belvia. It'll just kind've... float around ou until you want to use it. Just say or move your hands around or something to get its attention. It works pretty well. Just be really, really nice to computers from now on. It's not their fault; it's their bodies fault." He offered a little smile. "I called an old desktop a dinosaur one time. 'e didn't like that."

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik shook his head. "First of all, it can't be broken; it's intangible. Second, only the two of us can see it. Third you were mean to your computer prior to knowing that it was a 'sentient' being. Don't worry about anything. Oh, and fourth, you can dismiss it: it won't pester you when you don't want it to."

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik smiled. His only little set of screens-one that she could not see-appeared before him. He tapped a few seemingly nonexistent buttons and her little "computer" whirred to life. [Message: 1 game request from GreenS7oneGames] "Any you particularly fancy?"

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik looked at the stairs in the back corner. "Um... are there apartments upstairs... with beds?" He knew that that sounded like another prelude to less-than-honorable intentions but this time didn't voice an apology. "...We'd probably get hurt playing around down here."

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik jumped out of the stool to catch her but missed horribly and tripped, sending himself to the floor next to her. He rubbed his neck as he sat up. "A-are you alright, Belvia?"

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik stood up and extended an arm to help her up. "We could go? It seems the rain has died down a bit, but you'd still have to ride the hover bike."

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik was her second.

Guenhwyver entered slowly, his hands in his jacket pockets. He was dressed normally, too, the crinkle in the neck of his shirt being the only thing out of order; he had managed to nearly rip it apart trying to put on a tie. "I didn't eat breakfast, either." Likely for different reasons: His nervousness was obvious, after all.

With a sort of awkward smile, Guenhwyver walked past her. "Um... should we get a bar or booth seat?" He asked, glancing around the bar with a wish:

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik took a step towards one of the available booths, then stopped to let her catch up. "I... wasn't hungry?" He noted that he made the right choice in not dousing himself in too much cologne.

"But now I really am. Do you want your fried tofu minus the soap, again?" Guenhwyver looked at her, glad for another thing: She didn't dress herself up too much-or at all-nor did she go out of her way for anything. "Or are we to venture towards a new horizon of dieting?"

Guenwhyver jumped, ever so subtly, at he sudden music. His left arm reflexively moved back for his rifle... something he had left at his apartment. He as more likely to cut himself with the butterfly knife in his pocket than he was any assailant.

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik tripped. He didn't fall, but he didn't recover gracefully in the least. "N-no I wasn't calling you fat!" He said that perhaps far too loud. "I mean like... Well, a diet is..." He paused to consult something she couldn't see to double-check himself. "The kinds of food that a person, animal, or community habitually eats. You would've had something else, so a difference in diet... I'm sorry. You know I'm terrible with words. This is why I don't like to talk much."

One image came to Guenhwyver's mind: Troll Face's "Problem?" He certainly did have a problem! And it was with the sudden image that appeared in the center of his vision, virtue of the appliance spirit he had around him. "Knock it off!" He shouted at what seemed like no one in particular; no one could see it but him. The image persisted. "Please knock it off...?" He coaxed a little bit more politely. The image faded, leaving him still at a disadvantage.

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik sat the booth he had been striving for previously. "N-no I m... I give up. I'm doing a terrible job at this... I'm sorry..." He typed in her order, missing the compliment and the "my kind" hint, then folded his arms in the table and rested his head in the space they created. His words came awkwardly around the table and other protrusions: "I'm sorry."

The spirits buzzed stuff into his vision again, this one a video entitled "Five best ways to impress a girl." Despairingly, he clicked "view," but doubted anything could save him from these horrible, horrible fumbles. He didn't realize he hadn't ordered anything for himself, nor how rude it was to be shutting her out like this. He mumbled another "I'm sorry," then clammed up.

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik shot up when he hand was bit. "Ow!" He pulled it away from her and rubbed the wound that barely existed; yes, he was an over reactor. "Why'd you bite me? Am I doing that bad?!" He sunk back in his seat, feeling even worse now. "I could get it infected or something!"

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik sighed. "I'm really sorry, Belvia. I always get nervous around females... especially good looking ones such as yourself. You're one of the very few good-looking ones that isn't a complete bimbo, too! I... I really am sorry." He coughed and tapped in his order, then hit "send." "I didn't mean to offend you."

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik sighed. "Belvia, you're one of the best looking women I've ever met, and I'm glad you aren't one of those... undesirables. They're... disgusting, to say the least. And please don't bite me. It hurt!"

Beliva's "skank" comment reminded Guenhwyver of a musical number: "A kiss on the first makes a hussie, a second and you know she's not fussie. a one on the third and your head's with a cloud, for then you know that you've found..." He mumbled to himself.

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik persisted. "Well I think you are, Belvia. I don't find anything wrong with you." Their food arrived presently. Guenhwyver smiled at his bacon cheese burger and fries as the NPC robot placed everyone's food-most of which was Beliva's-on the table, then their drinks. He thanked the hapless NPC and sent him/her/it on their way. "Time to eat."

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik ate slowly, occasionally pausing for a sip of his drink-same as yesterday-or to dip a fry in some ketchup. He opted not to say anything, knowing that trying to compliment her-or anything else, for that matter-was going to end in her being in a huff with him.

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik ignored the cinnamon challenge request; it wasn't pleasant. "You do realize that the reward of winning that argument is insulting yourself, right?" He wasn't trying to condescending; he simply found that amusing. "You're gorgeous."

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik sighed. "Are you so vain as to not see beauty? Modesty is great and all, but look in a mirror sometime. I don't like girls with the ridiculous implants or special facial features. I'm not that shallow, and though I like what I see on the outside, my thine eye pierces deeper than the skin." <..was that romantic or stupid??

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looked down at his food. "Um... speaking of which... if this is our second 'date,' then are you...? Am I your...? Are we...? Um..." He coughed. "Do you need a refill?

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik took another bite of his food, now nearly done. "I'm so... what?"

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik tried to hide his little smile. "I know this is kind of pathetic to admit... but you are my first girlfriend..." His voice got really small on the latter part of the sentence. "...thank you..."

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik looked up at her. "I'm your first boyfriend? I... really?" He found that hard to believe. "...wow... I mean... You... You could probably get any guy you wanted..."

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Guenhwyvar Derozxik looked back down at the burger. He finished it, cleaned his hands on a napkin, then tossed the napkin into a waste bin. "I don't know if the whore-grubbers or the sociopaths are worst, honestly." He hated both varieties. "Well... I'm proud to be your first, at least. But if you're looking for pathetic, it's across the table, not you." He gesticulated to himself. "My vir-singleness isn't lack of effort."