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Skulduggery Pleasant

A wise-cracking skeleton detective with impeccible taste in clothing and a dangerous arsenal of elemental magic. He's probably your hero.

0 · 775 views · located in Terra

a character in “The Multiverse”, as played by ViceVersus

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So begins...

Skulduggery Pleasant's Story

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Skulduggery Pleasant strolled into the bar, her phone in hand again. She looked up and saw Doryn, and gave a small little wave.

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 ooc Dreamy!

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 Woah

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 ..

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Skulduggery Pleasant stepped into the bar, already unwinding his scarf. He tilted his head slightly as he took in the damage to the walls and ceiling. If the skeleton had eyebrows, they would have been raised.

"Well that doesn't seem overly helpful .. " The detective murmured, coming up to sit at the counter.

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Skulduggery Pleasant Holes in a roof! How practical was that? Skulduggery knew Gambit to be a practical man, not often given to such logical flops. Holes in a roof made about as much sense as screen doors on a submarine.

Or sunglasses for a skeleton.

Skulduggery removed the glasses, folded them delicately, and tucked them away into the front pocket of his pin-striped suit. This left the skeleton detective with a bare, bleached head that seemed to catch the light in an odd way.

As though he wasn't conscious of his odd look, Skulduggery drummed bony fingers on the countertop. He appeared to be waiting for someone.

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Skulduggery Pleasant It became clear that something rather large and rather dangerous had happened here. Skulduggery flicked his gaze around the bar. He ought to ask around, get some information. He was, after all, a detective.

To complete that detective look, Skulduggery pulled a cigar from his pocket. He snapped his fingers together, and a flame sprang to life. It was a neat trick that no one around him seemed to notice -- the skeleton visibly deflated.

"Harrumph." He said to himself, and lit the cigar, brought it to his jaw and took a puff. "Nothing impresses the kids anymore."

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Skulduggery Pleasant Smoking was something Skulduggery would never have done if he were alive. As he was dead, however (very dead, as the case were) he saw no harm in it. After all, there were no lungs to worry about.

He didn't enjoy the act itself, but perhaps more how it made him look -- how it made him feel. The skeleton detective tilted his head back and puffed a little cloud of smoke into the air.

Oh, he was a regular De Niro. Skulduggery hummed to himself, quite pleased.

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Skulduggery Pleasant lowered the cigar from his jaw, and bobbed his head at Derek. "You are, of course, laughing with joy at the supreme pleasure of seeing a skeleton smoke a cigar."

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 [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsNaR6FRuO0]Instant Dial-up Nostalgia. Click Me.[/url]

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Skulduggery Pleasant stepped into the bar, already unwinding his scarf. The skeleton detective looked up and around, observing the gaping holes in the roof.

"Well. That's not entirely helpful .. "

Holes in a roof! How practical was that? Skulduggery knew Gambit to be a practical man, not often given to such logical flops. Holes in a roof made about as much sense as screen doors on a submarine.

Or sunglasses for a skeleton.

Skulduggery removed the glasses, folded them delicately, and tucked them away into the front pocket of his pin-striped suit. This left the skeleton detective with a bare, bleached head that seemed to catch the light in an odd way.

As though he wasn't conscious of his odd look, Skulduggery drummed bony fingers on the countertop. He appeared to be waiting for someone.

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Skulduggery Pleasant It became clear that something rather large and rather dangerous had happened here. Skulduggery flicked his gaze around the bar. He ought to ask around, get some information. He was, after all, a detective.

To complete that detective look, Skulduggery pulled a cigar from his pocket. He snapped his fingers together, and a flame sprang to life. It was a neat trick that no one around him seemed to notice -- the skeleton visibly deflated.

"Harrumph." He said to himself, and lit the cigar, brought it to his jaw and took a puff. "Does nothing impress kids these days?"

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Skulduggery Pleasant Smoking was something Skulduggery would never have done if he were alive. As he was dead, however (very dead, as the case were) he saw no harm in it. After all, there were no lungs to worry about.

He didn't enjoy the act itself, but perhaps more how it made him look -- how it made him feel. The skeleton detective tilted his head back and puffed a little cloud of smoke into the air.

Oh, he was a regular De Niro. Skulduggery hummed to himself, quite pleased.

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 ooc Leaving Sato has left.

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Skulduggery Pleasant Smoking was something Skulduggery would never have done if he were alive. As he was dead, however (very dead, as the case were) he saw no harm in it. After all, there were no lungs to worry about.

He didn't enjoy the act itself, but perhaps more how it made him look -- how it made him feel. The skeleton detective tilted his head back and puffed a little cloud of smoke into the air.

Oh, he was a regular De Niro. Skulduggery hummed to himself, quite pleased.

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Skulduggery Pleasant "Like the plague." The skeleton detective looked up, appearing nonchalant as he blew a gray cloud o smoke in the woman's face. "Odd to see you out of your comfortable, posh apartment."

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Skulduggery Pleasant "It must have been a very important call." Skulduggery wasn't one to let something go by him. China knew him well in that regard. "For very important people."

The detective reached up, and tweaked his tie.

"Because I got one too."

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Fifteen rather testy minutes later, the door swung open and Skulduggery Pleasnt strode through.

The skeleton detective looked as distinguished as ever as he unwound that scarf from around his neck, revealing a bleach-white skull. He had gotten a new suit, it seemed -- a shade darker and a bit wider in the shoulder than the previous ones.

He made his way to where Valkyrie was seated, pulled himself up onto the stool next to her.

"You're late." Skulduggery said at once, in way of greeting.

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"I have not." The detective tilted his head to the side. Though it was hard to tell when he had no eyes, he appeared to be observing the patrons in the bar. "But what do you see, Valkyrie?"

Had she noticed the quasi-vampires, the lesser demons sipping brandy in the corner? The sad men, the bad men, the women with names like 'Clarabella' who had more than one head? Or maybe -- had she noticed that they were being watched?

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With delicate fingers, Skulduggery plucked Valkyrie's drink from her grasp. He held it up at eye level in front of her face, and for a second it looked like he was just peering at its contents.

"I would say something barbed, witty and to-the-point .. " The skeleton detective murmured, "but our lives are in too great of danger for that."

It finally became clear, the reason that Skulduggery was holding her glass up so oddly. If Valkyrie focused on the object itself, she might notice someone sitting in the corner of the bar with his arms folded across his chest, and a wide-rimmed cowboy hat snugged low over his nose.

"Or," Skulduggery remanded, "maybe that is too dramatic. Maybe, our lives aren't quite in danger. Maybe they are in question? No, that also doesn't make sense .. "

He lowered the glass, and if he could have, the detective would have winked.

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"Well," said the detective, swiveling his stool and waving to Billy-Ray jovially, "there is one way to find out."

The Texan unfolded himself from the corner at once, practically bouncing when he got to his feet. This energy got him to the counter where the two were seated. Billy-Ray Sanguine turned hollow eyes on the, both, and all at once his mouth twisted into a smile.

"Well, well. Fancy meetin' the both of you here," He drawled, and lifted two fingers to the bartender. When his drink came, he brought it to his lips without the slightest care on the world. "Oh, and I'd recommend not tryin' to kill me, or anything. Here, in this place? You'd have people twice as bad but not half as good lookin' jumping down your throat .. "

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"Aw, darlin' your mouth is much bigger." The Texan beamed -- and to Valkyrie's chagrin, Skulduggery had to nod in agreement.

"It is rather large," the detective mused, gazing at Valkyrie with what could only be considered mild amusement. Before Valkyrie could reply (or smack him), Skulduggery had continued. "As we're not yet dead, Billy-Ray, or making breathless final requests I assume there is something keeping you from your bloodthirsty thirst for, well, blood."

Billy-Ray shrugged, "ain't workin' right now, I'm off the clock. But aside from that, I must admit there are a few people in here who .. who wouldn't like the scene, you know?"

Skulduggery immediately tilted his head to the side as Billy-Ray took another generous sip of his whiskey. "Why did your orders change?"

"Can't say as I know, detective." Sanguine lowered his glass, and there was (rather obviously) the trace of a pout on his lips.

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"Awww .. " Billy-Ray was definitely pouting this time, and the crisp brim of his hat seemed to wilt.

"He could be getting old," the detective said conversationally, "or maybe he's finally starting to like us. It's about time, really. My company is quite enjoyable."

Sanguine stroked the front of his jacket absently, where he kept his switchblade. "The two of you are just .. just cruel, that's what."

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Skulduggery lay there, his hat flopped next to him and his scarf slithering down on the pegs of the stool. The skeleton detective's skull had been jerked bit off center, and he knocked it back with a hollow-sounding thok.

"Do you see what I put up with?" Skulduggery said in a long-suffering way to Billy-Ray, who only took another drink of his whiskey.

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"The two of you are a regular after-school special." Billy-Ray shook his head in amazement as Skulduggery climbed back onto his stool, and made great swiping motions at Valkyrie to get his hat back.

Eventually the skeleton detective drew his hand back sharply, creating a vacuum instead of a gust of air -- and sucked the hat back into his grasp.

"We are, aren't we?" Skulduggery covered the bleach-white dome of his skull, and he inclined his head to the Texan. "And what would that make you?"

"That downright dashing, yet dangerous fella they warn y'all about on the evening news." Sanguine grinned. "Or maybe I'd get my own Hallmark movie. You know. 'Screams in the Night' or something catchy."

"That is not catchy .. "