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Fen Adrien Wiley

"I'll be OK tonight, I will. I'll be OK tonight, I will," The young man closed his eyes and clenched his fists at his sides. "I'll be OK tonight, I will." For a moment, he thought of how amazing it was that he'd been at the Academy for nearly a year or so and yet there were so many people who didn't know him or didn't notice him. Was he that far in the shadows? When he saw troubled people, he would make his way over to them and try to help (albeit awkwardly). There were so many things that he could find sense in, and yet this was at the top of the list of the things he couldn't figure out along with the mystery that was Fen Wiley. "I'll be OK tonight, I will." Sure.. he was one of the sons of Poseidon. He was a demi-god. He was Fen. But who was Fen? And wasn't there more to him than any of those other things? "I'll be OK tonight, I will." No matter how many times he said these words to convince himself, he still felt all his nerves were on Nothing was helping. Fen hurried off into his bathroom and stared into the mirror, frantically looking over his face and then finally meeting his own blue eyes on the surface and.. nothing.

Slowly, he wrapped his arms around himself and formed a sort of protective cocoon. His fingers began to press lightly into his sides, slowly gaining more pressure until he was squeezing his torso tightly. Why was he doing this again? Letting his mind get the better of him and send him into a sort of thought frenzy. Quickly his fingers fumbled with the water faucet on the sink, and he ran his hands under the cool flow of water, closing his eyes. Fen shook a few drops from his skin before patting both of his cheeks and closing his eyes. "I'll be OK tonight. I. Will." The nights mantra replayed on his lips, each sentence becoming more silent until the last was barely a wisp of breath. By the time he reopened his eyes, not even knowing when he'd closed them, nearly another whole five minutes had passed. He couldn't keep doing this to himself. He came to the Academy to find hisself, to become strong, to be noticed and to be there. Why hadn't he found it yet. It'd been long enough he figured. A slow and shaky breath escaped his lips as he lowered his hands and looked over his attire. He grabbed the small pocket hanky hanging from his suit pocket and tossed it onto his bed before nodding at his reflection.

It was then that he began taking slow steps towards his bedroom door, his mantra repeating itself in his head. Fen remembered his plan then. If it all became too much he had a plan that would help calm his nerves (while getting him out of dancing with anyone). If anything happened that was straining, he’d sneak out of the gymnasium and make his jolly way towards the lake. Once there he would proceed and take off his suit to reveal the swim trunks he was wearing underneath it all. Then he’d jump off the dock and let the water soothe his nerves. The nerves that still hadn't calmed his stomach. Any moment from now he felt like he'd ralph all over his suit. Fen placed his hand on the doorknob and stared at his hand as it twitched slightly.

Five. "I could just change into my pajamas and relax here in my room.."

Four. "It's not like anyone would be looking for me at the dance. I mean Chloe may be a bit worried."

Three. "Or not notice at all.."

Two. "My hand hasn't moved, there's still a chance to take over control of my body again and curl up with a good book."

One. Fen threw the door open and jumped nearly two feet when it slammed back against his wall. A bright blush colored his cheeks as he glanced down both the north and south ends of the dorms hallway, glad that no one had seen or heard what'd happened. He took a step out of his room. It was now or never, do or die (not literally). It was only a dance. He quickly took another step, both feet side by side now. There was no chance he'd back down. He couldn't, he'd already left the room. Quickly he began shuffling down the hallway, fussing quietly over his slightly rumpled suit and smoothing his hair back from where it'd fallen into his eyes. And this time, he said with a bit more confidence than the last, "I'll be OK tonight.. I will."