Feardia's Story

The faeries were now hushed, eyes intent on the battle coming to a close. Helen stood in front of the mass of Faeries, her index finger of her right hand on her temple. Feardia had already left them earlier. He had wanted to watch out for Skye-Not that she needed it-and he was disturbed by how much he missed him brethren. He hadn't slain anyone yet. He didn't particularly enjoy the act, as a healer, but neither did he cower from it. He stepped over bodies without looking down to see if they were alive or not. But he could feel it. The end was nigh. Neither force could hold out much longer.

I left the kitchen maids where they were, and climbed back to the library. I opened the door slowly, detesting how even the ancient library's silence was corrupted by the sounds of battle. I took my seat next to the largest window and looked down again. I could watch now without retching, but I retained my disgust and grief at this terrible waste of life. I quickly picked out my friends-noting unhappily that Feardia was nearing the bloodshed.

All of a sudden, a ring of fire rose from the earth. I put my hand to my lips to muffle my gasp, as Jaxin was hidden from my view. He was the person I had been watching at that precise moment. I looked for Skye too, but she must have been within the circle of flames. Feardia was outside the licking flames, looking deeply at it, as if to break it with his eyes. Apparently, he could find no way to look inside as he suddenly roared with frustration. The faeries did not move, or blink an eyelid. Only Helen moved, reestablishing her hold on her staff intently.
I moved closer to the window. There, I could, albeit barely, see into the ring. I could distinguish three people, but their faces were blurred by the heat of the air around them. Three must have been hidden from my view. I bit my lip. Feardia's back was to the Faeries, and all his energy must have been out into hiding his emotions from the faeries, because his face was the most open I had ever seen it. The was fear in his face, a fear that couldn't be for his own safety. You could see it in his eyes, it was a fear for a loved one.

Faye saw then, through the flames and waves of blistering heat, Alabaster stalking towards a suddenly crippled Eruda. She pressed herself to the window, watching him without blinking. This was it. She hoped, oh so prayed that this was it. Alabaster would get hat he wanted yet again, and people would stop suffering.

But it was not so. Eruda, jerked her hand up without warning, ripping through Alabaster's proud, arrogant chest. Although Faye couldn't hear her words, Faye knew that Eruda had been feigning her lack of power. She was just as strong as always was, and she was going to win. Faye's spirit sank. Feardia would survive, at least. With his family. But her.. She doubted it, unless she was turned into something like the creatures downstairs, afraid of the light, but prey of the dark. Skye, death, or worse. Arthur, Alienor... Her fate would be the worse, Faye thought, sick at heart. She wasn't surprised to see Alienor try save Alabaster, but she was wholly unprepared to see what Eruda did to her. Faye's eyes flickered to Feardia, expecting him to be mad with the screams. But he was standing as still as his brethren, watching the fire intently. He must know Skye's screams well enough about to worry, Faye observed. Although it was the most inappropriate time,, she giggled. Then she hated herself for laughing when Alienor was being butchered before her eyes. She shut her mouth and once more pressed herself to the window.

..Everything had changed within a second. The fire, gone. Alienor was on the ground, Eruda's broken corpse discarded several feet away. Alabaster held Alienor's limp body to him, as gentle as she had ever seen him. Just proof Jesus was in all souls, dark or light. Feardia was approaching cautiously, as he was most likely unsure about what had happened. His eyes darted everywhere, taking in everything. Instead of going near Alienor as Faye hoped, he moved in the slow direction of Skye, relief beginning to paint his face.

Faye was missing someone... Where was Jaxin? She moved her neck anxiously, but she couldn't see him. He couldnt have disappeared, he was in the ring of fire earlier! She was beginning to dread the worst, when Alabaster stood up with Alienor in his arms. Then she saw in his shadow, her brother. He was injured, she could see, but he seemed stable enough. Her legs suddenly wanted to give out, as if her gut wrenching worry had been the only thing holding her up.

She sent a quick prayer up to God. He was clearly the reason her loved ones were alive. All of them. But she still felt the pain of a thousands deaths on the battlefield. She picked up her skirts and turned away from the window. Now was the time for the water. She would demand Feardia help her attend to the dying and the ones that they could salvage. She skipped down the stairs. The buckets were where she wanted them. She picked up two and bent over with their weight. Grimacing, she let one down and gripped the one left with both hands. She pushed the great doors open with her back, and the dreary hall was flooded with watery dawn light, yet it barely broke the gloom as if the hall refused to affected.

She faced the battlefield, her eyes half closed from the brightness. Her sight came back only in time to see Alabster rushing towards her, Alienor in his hands. She only managed to throw herself out of the way before he passed her into the hall. The door slammed behind them as if to keep out everyone but his master. Unfortunately, in her hurry to get out of Alabster's way the bucket tipped over her, soaking her gown and wings. Droplets of water fell from her waterproof wings, but the water rapidly sank to her skin, chilling her in the Dawn's light breeze. Too afraid to go in after the mad man, she pushed herself up and walked towards Feardia and the others. She pushed herself to walk faster an normal, despite her bothersome corset. As soon as she reached the edge of the battlefield. She couldn't continue. The ground around her was littered with bodies of fallen warriors, fallen fathers, fallen sons, fallen children. She couldn't quite breathe, and it had nothing to do with her corset. Two bodies away, a young man was choking on his own blood, and it gurgled from a gash in his throat. Kneeling next to him, she ripped one of the bottles from her waist and tipped a drop of its mixture into one of the poor creatures open wounds, into his veins. It took only a few moments before his body convulsed violently for the last time, and stilled. She slipped her hands over his eyes and closed them. Quitely, she murmured the Last Rites into his ear, begging God to forgive his sins, and that he be granted into Heaven. 'Amen.' She finished, unable to keep her tears in. Once upon a time, his mother held him as he cried. Once upon a time, he created mirth amongst his friends, he created tears, perhaps he held a girl. Most probably, she wouldn't see his face again, for Faye couldn't think of anyone caring enough to send the bodies home before they decayed. Rubbing her tears away with fingers stained red, she pushed herself up again. She stopped every now and then to administer the poison on people she knew Feardia couldn't save, or those he wouldn't be able to save in time. Sooner they she could have believed, every one of her four bottles were emptied, even though she never used more than two drops. She forced herself not to look down, but walked towards the others, not much closer than when she started. Upon seeing Jaxin and his pure white wings, something terrible occurred to Faye. Something that made her stop again, something that made her trembling knees almost give in again.

She was a murderer.



Feardia nodded to Skye. But before he could move away, he had to touch her. Just to make sure that she really was unharmed. He touched a darked piece of flesh before the black receded, leaving her skin clear again. "I'll do at then," he said, assured that she was fine. He pulled his arm back and turned away to go talk to the angel, still on the ground. Feardia couldn't help but feel as if Jaxin was weak.

Feardia sauntered over to Jaxin. He stood over the Angel's trembling form, uncompassionate. "Get up. You've got to go and get ready to leave. That includes convincing Faye to leave... Use your authority as a true angel if you must, even if it upsets her to be reminded that she's Fallen." He didn't offer his hand.

Feardia gave up on trying to talk to Jaxin. He was unresponsive, still trembling on the ground. He turned on his heel and strode towards the middle of the field where Faye was kneeling. He wondered what she had done during the battle and what she was doing now. Maybe she was praying, he thought in disgust. A bit late for that now.
Approaching her, he slowed down. Her face was absolutely blank; eyes dead, face bloodless. He felt concern for her although he hated it. If he were to care about Faye, he would spend every moment of every day doing so. She wasn’t made for this world. “Faye?” His voice was soft and cautious. “Faye, you shouldn’t have come out. You know you’re not used to all this gore.”
She looked up at him, eyes unseeing. “Feardia?”
“Come, Faye. We’re leaving this place. You won’t ever have to see this again. C--”
He stopped talking and looked her up and down. For the first time, he had noticed the empty vials at her waist. Glancing at her face, he slipped one out of their holds and sniffed it. He looked at her again, but now for the first time as if he was really seeing her. “Faye?”
“Yes?” She replied, emotionless.
“This vial used to hold poison. So did all those at your waist, I dare suppose. But now they’re empty.”
“And?”
“What did you do?” Horror was growing in his chest. Death and murder didn’t bother him. But that Faye could lose her innocence, that this wretched place was capable of tearing even the most untainted of consciences, was appalling. She may have been irritating, but she was a breath of fresh, clean air at times.
“They were in pain. Unable to be saved. So I prayed for them and ended their life.” The words were spoken as if they were foreign and she didn’t understand the meaning of them. The only sign of distress were her hands; her nails were dug deeply into the flesh of her thighs. Feardia didn’t know what to say to her, for the first time in his life.
“It.. you did well, Faye. Come now. It’s time to go. We went through this before, remember? You’re coming with us.” He took hold of her arms and pulled her up.
“Don’t speak to me like a child.” Emotion flared on her face in the form of a flush. “I’m not going.” She ripped her arms away from him.
“What?” He was dumbfounded. It made absolutely no sense that she didn’t want to go with them. Fair enough, she had never joined in on their conversations of their escape, but never had she made any inclination that she wasn’t going to join them. The idea was ridiculous. She simply couldn't protect herself alone, not to mention survive by herself in Alabaster's castle. "What are you messing at, Faye?" He demanded, confusion quickly turning to anger.
"I can't leave." She replied, her eyebrows set resolutely. 
"You can't not leave. You were welcomed here as a guest of a Faerie Prince. Now that exact Faerie Prince is stealing away one of Alabaster's most prized warriors. You're not even significant enough to be punished for my actions, but you certainly won't be welcome. If you're lucky, you won't die for quite a while. But that innocence face of yours is simply too tempting for the occupants of this place. Besides that, you have a tendency to be annoying. Especially if you attempt to interact with Alienor. She's lost to us, Faye, since before we met her, since she stumbled upon this black land. Coming here was her downfall, and staying here will be yours. You'll die one day, alone and unnoticed except for the rats who will feed off your flesh. Your body will rot in a forgotten room, in a forgotten corridor, not grieved for by a single soul. If someone comes across your bones one day, they'll throw them to the dogs, and not even the dogs will want to eat from them. Is that all worth whatever idiotic reason you have for staying?"
"That..image you painted so well won't happen, Feardia. Go without me. Be happy. Make Skye happy."
"So this is what it's about? Your foolish infatuation with me? You can't stand to see me with her? You stupid child."
"That's not it." She leaned in and kissed his cheek. "Goodbye, friend. Bade my farewell to Skye too. But I am to stay here."
"...Please, Faye."
"Thank you, Feardia, for your concern, but you can't change my mind."
Feardia withdrew his outstretched arm. "This is not out of concern." He said, sounding furious. "Do you know how many pains I've been through to save your worthless hide? The inconveniences I've endured with the role of your guardian thrust upon my unconsenting shoulders? I've protected you from my family, forgiven you for putting Skye's life on the line when you betrayed us... And now you want to throw it all away? Damn you."
"I'm already damned," she said softly. "I'll be fine. Trust me. Now go. Be lighthearted knowing I am no longer your burden. Spent your time protected you lovely other half instead. I will keep you in my prayers."
Feardia scoffed. "You'll need more than prayers, dear. You'll need a miracle. You have no other protector. Even Jaxin will leave you. He's going, didn't you know?"
"He.. But he's Alienor's protector."
"And like I said, she's gone beyond his help. Besides, Helen will be a frequent visitor. It isn't wise for any type of angel to be alone with her in a castle laden with torture equipment."
Feardia imagined that if her face could get any paler, it would have then. "..I'm sorry."
Without a word, he turned away and left her. Faye felt terrible that their parting was so full of bitterness and misunderstanding, but unlike him, she knew it wouldn't be her last.

Feardia returned to where Skye was standing, in the middle of the scorched circle Alabaster had left. She was completely back to herself now, no trace of the black tendrils that had enveloped her skin only minutes before. Arthur was near, still forced to kneel within the confines of the thick vines she had created. He was still struggling, although Feardia supposed that he knew it was fruitless at this point. Feardia almost felt sorry for him. He could imagine what it felt like to watch his lover been carried off by another. He just didn’t imagine himself being stopped by flowery. The upsides of being a Faerie, he thought wryly.
“We’re going. Now. We can’t wait for him to tire himself out.” He breathed in deeply. The smell of burnt grass did nothing to hide the pungent stench of burnt flesh. He didn’t enjoy it. Death, no matter if it was only humans who were dealt it, was not amusing. “Faye isn’t coming, Skye. She won’t explain herself, and she isn’t delirious. She’s attached to this place. Look, there she is. Bidding farewell to her brother.” He made a sound at the back of his throat. “It doesn’t matter. It shouldn’t, anyway.”

Faye approached Jaxin slowly. She didn’t know if she could face him. Feardia was hard enough. He hadn’t been quick enough to hide how horrified her actions had made him. But to look Jaxin in the eye and know that she.. She had always thought that someday, she would be forgiven. That if she lived a good life on Earth, they would accept her back eventually. But now it could never happen. And she didn’t think that even Jaxin could still accept her after what she had done. The guilt was overwhelming, but she didn’t understand. She didn’t understand how she could feel so evil about a deed done with merciful intent. She clenched her fists into the material of her dress. It had become stiff in areas where the bloodstains had dried.
He had stanched his own wounds, at least, but he looked exhausted. Grey shadows underlined his eyes, making him look at least a decade older. Ash stained his hair and face, dulling the brilliance of his wings. She knelt carefully next to him. “Brother?” She reached out to brush her fingers against his cheekbones. She knew she was far older than him, but he had always seemed wiser than her, and purer. The type of angel little girls prayed to. “I’m so glad you’re alive, brother. I thought-I...I wasn’t.. it didn’t look like you’d survive at some points. I was frightened. I c-couldn’t even trust in the Lord’s will. But you’re alive.. more or less.”