The spoon's Story

The spoon heard the door open and froze. He'd endured days of wandering the table uselessly, collecting his thoughts. But during the hours that the host sat staring at him, he felt enslaved, unable to even twitch. Moving in the presence of humans was strictly forbidden, though none seemed to know why. He watched as the host walked over to the table and sat a small box down. His curiosity peaked. The host tore away the box and the packaging as though he couldn't breathe until it was opened. Inside was a small plate. He felt an explosion of joy at the thought of some company followed by a tinge of guilt at rejoicing even though he knew that yet another would be in his exact same situation soon. The host wiped the wrapping off the table with the back of his hand and sat the plate next to the spoon.

He sat silently, staring at what he'd gathered so far. Just a spoon and a tea saucer.
"Speak to me", he whispered, his voice barely auditory. They said nothing, and he knew that if he were to catch them speaking or moving, they'd need more motivation than just one other item with which to interact. After what seemed an eternity he stood. He felt tired and weak, and for the first time recognized that he hadn't eaten or slept in days. But he couldn't stop now. He walked out of the room, disregarding the litter on the floor. Perhaps he'd stop and eat at a restaurant on his search. Maybe he could slip a knife or fork into his pocket and walk out with it.

He heard the rustling of the host putting his coat back on, and then the door again. He waited a few minutes just to make sure he was really gone, then slide closer to the plate and introduced himself. "I've never seen such a small plate", he remarked.

"I haven't seen him eat any meals yet." , the spoon replied. "As you can probably tell by now, he's not like most people. Most buy sets of us. He seems to be seeking us out individually. I got separated from my set a long time ago though. Sold for a dollar to a pawn shop. What about you?"

"I'm not part of a set," the saucer said, with a hint of envy in its voice. "I was in the kitchen department at Macy's. Not even packaged! My teacup was sold separately! What is this world coming to?" It rattled dramatically, enjoying the fact that it had a listener who was not competing with it. All the other saucers in the store always had some snide remarks lined up about this saucer's off-color spots. It showed individual craftsmanship, the saucer insisted, but they always laughed cruelly.

The spoon slide around the saucer stopping next to the fork. He could see that the fork had seen plenty of wear. He listened carefully for some time, to make sure that the host really was in his bedroom sleeping. Just an hour ago, he'd burst in through the door and rushed to the table to lay a mug down. Standing there for some time, he murmured enthusiastically about how well his collection was going before his energy was depleted and his eyelids began forcing themselves shut. Hearing nothing but the host's breathing, he whispered to the fork "Are you alright?"

The saucer shuddered at the idea of being... tickled! By a great beard! Human mouths were filthy! It was so thankful that it wasn't a fork or spoon, so that it wouldn't have to be shoved inside those wet, disgusting orifices several times a day. Though it was rather impressed by the beer mug's, er, martial prowess. This cup was no pushover, not like the mild spoon or the theatrical butter knife.

The saucer shrank slightly at the mention of department store gossip, which cut it deep, for the statement was very true. It had never had any proper experience with a human, after all, aside from being gifted, and all these other objects had. Still, it wasn't about to let that show. This was its first day here, and even if it wasn't the most wordly it had to show everytool that it was still a viable candidate for king of the table. "Say that again, I dare you!" It angrily hopped up and down, clank clank clank. "I bet you anything you'll be the first one to crack!" it said, referring to the host's intention of getting them all to speak to him, which by now was getting quite clear. Its voice carried to the other utensils. "You'll be the one that exposes us all!"