Pirate
Lazy and argumentative, Ed doesn't get along with most people. He was in with a bad crowd during his youth, and missed his opportunity at an education. He is not particularly smart, but he doesn't lack for common sense. Although he sometimes tries swagger of bravado, Ed is openly a coward, and will run from most situations. More than anything, he desires the life of a movie star: fame ,fortune, and women. He has none of these. Ultimately, he is too meek to be cruel, but makes up for it in selfishness.