Setting
The partner, an oddly youthful-looking lady with hair which seems to think that gravity happened to other people, responded "Can't you do it, love?"
The wizened scrag, with difficulty, lifts his left arm, which begins to shake violently and, due to the skeleton's weakened soul, began to fall apart, from its digits to its shoulder-blade. "Bollocks."
That was as soon as Jonathan entered the room. The strange thing was, when you enter through the open portal, you find yourself opening a set of doors at the end of the portal-way.
The lady turned to her partner. "Language, darling. The loony Governor's here."
Said loony gave the couple a crooked grimace which the denizens of the Underworld have agreed to be his smile. Then he turned to the open doorway and spoke "Here we are, darlings! The Entrance Lobby to the Underworld!" The surrounding corpses gave him a look of perplexity, then a look of shock when they saw a duo of winged ladies enter the Lobby. One skeleton's jaw, quite literally, dropped to the ground. They were even more shocked to think John, of all people, was guiding them here.
The now-one-armed skeleton, who came from a time where manners were well-paid, rasped, "Jonathan, who are these lovely ladies?"
John gave him a wry look. "These ladies are Elyzia and Valfiel. They come from a world called Grand Gaia, and I wish to assist them in returning to their home. Ladies, that there's Arthur," he would point to the three-limbed frame, "He died of more natural causes than the average Victorian corpse." He would then gesture to the skeleton's partner. "And that is Helen. She, ah," he lowers his voice, as not to upset the lady, "Crossed the Jordan when someone poisoned her for her finances."
As the skeleton Arthur greeted them, Elyzia gave a small bow. "Pleased to meet you Arthur. I am Elyzia and thank you for the compliment. Also I am pleased to meet you as well Helen" She replied. Valfiel however gave Arthur and Helen a energetic wave. "Nice to meet you guys! I am Valfiel. I hope we can get along just fine!" She replied with her energetic attitude.
John would walk over to a booth at the end of the lobby, its inhabitant regarding him indifferently. If you took a sumo wrestler, fed him purple jelly until he exploded, then stitched his remains back together, along with some spare arms and eyes, you would only get so close as to describing the Receptionist. The creature seemed cramped in the small booth.
"Mornin', Receptionist!" called John.
The Receptionist, due to a lack of proper vocal cords, gave him a grumble.
"... Whatever time it is, anyway. I would like permission to take these ladies to-"
"Grroowwwwllll..."
"A ticket?! I'm the Governor of the Skelecoots, I would gladly let them in without-"
"GRRROOOWWWLLL...."
".... Fine."
John would reach into a pocket in his coat, producing a leather wallet in good condition, if slightly corroding. He would take out several coins, each inscribed, with closer inspection, with a skull on one side, and a pelvis on another. This was probably the undead's version of heads and tails.
"Here you go," muttered John. "10 Skulls."
The Receptionist would, with a smaller arm, take the coins and take them to some unknown area within the booth. The many eyes would look slightly to the left, it's body rippling from the movement of an unseen appendage, before two tickets, each labelled with the name, "SKELEVILLE", would be produced. John would take the tickets and lend them to the sisters. "Here you go. Sorry about the interference, newcomers have to buy a ticket to go anywhere these days."
John soon began to negotiate with the Receptionist and tried to get them in without a ticked, however it seemed that he lost the argument as handed over ten coins with a skull etched on each of them. The Receptionist would then hand John two tickets and he in return gave them to the sisters. "Thank you very much John, its no problem at all. You are voluntarily helping us reach home. We don't mind any sort of interference." Elyzia spoke up before Valfiel added on to it. "Yeah, Its just a ticket to head to a new area. Its not like we have to wait to get on a train to prevent the end of the world." She chuckled.
He would turn on his heel and head to a pair of large, ornate elevator doors, the top of the frame decorated with an ancient language that reads "Hic in terram mortuum fuerit elevator". He would press a button next to the doors, which do what they were built to do.
"This elevator," announced John, "was built in a way that, no matter how many are actually in the elevator, it is always empty for whoever enters it. Good for supposing traffic."
The group enter the spacious confines of the mystic elevator. Instead of the usual panel containing the buttons to the floors, there is a large wheel with its edge facing the inside of the elevator, countless buttons on its circumference. John would spin the wheel by means of a pair of buttons, each in the shape of an arrow, facing up and the direction John was spinning the wheel currently. He would then press a key labelled "189".
The elevator begins to shudder, making, for no apparent reason, the sound of a locomotive.
John would hold on to a railing. "This tends to go rather fast, so I suggest you hold on!"
The sudden sensation as he says this would be similar to zero gravity, then rapidly reaching negative-one gravity. Grinding and screeching would fill the confines in a cacophony. Lights begin to flicker, the walls suddenly and briefly turning transparent, displaying strange landscapes, filled with red devils, green devils, satyrs, et al. There were the typical magmatic hellholes, and beautiful gardens, and then cities, towns, and then the walls returned from whatever dimension they were previously thrown in.
As they approached floor 189(0), the sounds of hissing steam, the clanging of machinery, and most notably, the occasional "yu fokin' wot? I'll bash ye head in, ya fokin' zounderkite!"
They were not going to think to heavily on the contraption, however as the elevator began to shudder and the sound of a locomotive began to sound, Elyzia took hold of one of the railings. Valfiel also took hold of one of the railings. "How fast could this elevator possibly go--Ahhhhhhhh!" She yelled as the elevator suddenly went so fast that gravity seemed to become zero. The walls turned transparent and a horrid grinding noise as the elevator moved. As the elevator approached floor 189, Valfiel stopped yelling and calmed down. "A...heads up....before we enter...would be nice..."She spoke in between breaths as she looked around to make sure the elevator did not move again.
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