Walther Khon's Story

Dad stiffened at that, trying to keep himself from sobbing over the boy's shoulder. Boy. He pondered that for a moment as he quietly amended himself. Man. This was a man before him, and quite a man at that. There was no reason why he shouldn't be proud of him, and again did the man regret that any of this had ever happened.

What pride can a single father hold, siring children and not able to keep his wife?

"No, August. I... I can't stay. Caroline and Helene are far away." He tried his best to be happy about it, but he couldn't manage, at least not well; Walther's voice shook as he spoke, not wanting to let on to his child how his parents felt.

"H-... Helene's going to be a mom soon, August. You get to be an uncle." And he got to be a grandfather, even if he never visited. He couldn't stand to, seeing a viable, functional family. Walther didn't want to ruin their days with his sour expression and constant depression, and simply stayed away, sending generous gifts to his daughters, and his respect to Helene's husband.

"I... I just got lost for a very long time."

Hope sobbed, breath hitching. Helene was to me a mom. That made her a grandmother, though not for the first time. She stood and walked on to the kitchen, intent on doing something else. She'd fix dinner. That would be for the best. The absolute best she was certain. What else could she do?

August turned to watch her go confused. Mom seemed sad. Dad seemed sad. "Dad, stay for dinner. Mom cooks good. Tonight is lasagna night. It's yummy." It was more than he normally ever talked at all. "Stay tonight? Mom misses you. She cries a lot."

Mom was special, he knew. She was also scared, and she wouldn't say of what. He just knew he liked Mom and Mom liked Dad, even if she seemed real sad.

"I'm glad your not lost now. I was sad, when you were lost. Viktoria was too." Viktoria had been his playmate and had not understood why he couldn't seem to understand what happened.

He remained for a few moments, holding his son there as he debated, mentally. Could he manage to sit and eat at a table with someone he hated and loved at the same time? No doubt his son, his wonderful, innocent son wanted him to return to her, but he didn't know if he could. Walther didn't know if he could manage that for his son.

He would kill for him, die for him, but he didn't have the stomach to live for him.

"I... I can't say no to my boy." Khon managed, pulling back to put his cheek against August's, his own rather damp with the tears he'd squeezed out. How he missed this man! How he had prayed for this very day to come, and here it was...

... more painful than he had ever imagined it.

"I... I might eat here. In the living room. I don't... I don't think mom wants me here." At least at the same table. Walther couldn't help himself from how he began to cry now, sobs edging into his voice as he thought of Hope, crying.

No, she couldn't cry! She didn't know what this pain was that he had to live with. She was the villain in his eyes, in the dream and the vision he had created. It wasn't possible.

But he could hear her now. Was it true, or was it simply guilt?

"I love you, Augustus. I have always loved you."

August looked confused. You didn't eat in the living room! That wasn't right at all, you at at the table in the dining room. It was the eating room, not the living room.

The man pulled his dad's hand. "Okay. I'll set the table." And he'd set it for Dad also. Dad sat at the head of the table. He had been setting a full table, for five, for years now. Hope knew better than to not make food for every plat, and to parcel it out as well.

Augustus didn't take well to it. Just in case his sister's or Dad appeared, and here his Dad was.

Hope, in the kitchen, finished setting up the lasagna, and put it in the oven to bake. "Dinner will be ready in thirty minutes, Auggy!" Most of it had been in a slow cooker for hours already. It just needed to all be combined.

August smiled at this and set the table careful, precisely. Each cup and each utensil and each plate had its place.

Hope slipped out of the kitchen, and to the living room. Not able to meet her eyes, she spoke. "What would you like to drink, Walt- Ritten-Standartanführer?"

She didn't think he wanted her to use his name. She just...she didn't.

Walther watched, hurting all the while as his son set off to deal with the table, the plates and the glasses and the forks and spoons. It was amazing how precise the man could be, far more than himself even after years of drill and practice. He had it down to an art.

Khon hadn't followed his son, simply stood where he had in the living room, unmoving as he quietly cried out what he needed to now before he moved to eat with them. There was no reason that he should be sobbing into his plate. It would be beyond rude.

And even if she had done him the ultimate disservice, as an officer he knew he was better than that.

Soon he threw hands to his face at the sound of Hope nearby, to cover his shame and to wipe at his eyes in a futile gesture. They were leaking, and they wouldn't stop no matter how he tried. "... water, Leoni." He used her name, if it was even her name, as he knew it. He was dad again tonight, and he would do the best he could for his son.

Augustus deserved it.

"Just water." Came his voice, muffled behind his hands, wobbling between sobs.

Hope nodded, and, uncertain, approached, then wrapped her arms around him, crying into him, if he'd let her. "I'm so sorry Walther. I'm so very sorry." He couldn't imagine it...though she knew his pain was greater than hers. After all, she had known, almost expected, that they would one day make her move. Walther on the other had had been innocent, had been a loving doting husband.

He had been heaven, and she had plunged him into Hell. She should have spoken with him, done anything but leave a damn note, that, from his earlier words, he hadn't received.

An officer, in the Academy...he would have been decades older than the oldest of the other students, his body less of what it needed to be. Her poor darling.

Hardly hers now. Hardly at all. She didn't know what she was going to do. For now, should he let her, she just wanted to hold him. Augustus, no doubt, would not even truly notice anything was wrong, and would continue his nightly diner ritual.

He was sorry too, though he couldn't speak from where he was, hardly quiet. Walther cried openly, not moving to remove her hands from him, even if he sobbed into his own. Part of him wanted to lash out at her, strike her and let her know how he felt, how much he hated her for what she had done to him and their little girls.

But he still loved her, and wanted to love her, even if it hurt him so badly.

Between tears and watered vision he watched his son, trying to smile to him where he was, though the gasps kept him from keeping it for very long. He was sorry, in his own way, that he was so wrong now.

He knew it too.

Khon knew she cried too, and didn't move to disturb her, figuring she needed it as much as he.

Hope let the tears run dry and took a deep breath. "My handler...changes every five years, like clockwork. I'll be getting a new one in a few days. After that, you should..you should stop by. I have to install the special doors in all three palaces over the next few days. You could stay with August."

Hope had been chosen because Wing knew she could be highly trusted, and knew how to install the damn things herself. She just prayed Walther would want to.

Augustus folded each napkin just so, and smiled. "Mom! It's time for drinks Mom. You have to put them down now."

Walther didn't speak for some time, lingering for a while as she held him still, not sure what to think of her touch, his own tears drying as he thought on the matter. Was that an invitation, to rejoin a life that had been stripped from him? It was too good to be true, in his opinion.

How far would he fall when she left him this time?

"I could." He spoke, quiet.

The knight stared at the floor, quiet, not sure if he was brooding or mourning. Perhaps both. Perhaps he would give this a chance, though he doubted it would work. He doubted she or August wanted anything to do with him anymore.

Walther was dead. There was just Knight-Inquisitor Khon now.

"... let's have dinner." He offered, pulling away from her to see to his coat, before moving to sit at the table.

Hope smiled and got the drinks ready, the oven time buzzing just as he last of five glasses, all water, were set out. She used over mitts and placed the hot casserole dish full of lasagna out.

The woman hesitated with the knife, and checked with her son. "Who do you want to cut the lasagna, sweetie?" She ad a feelign it wasn't her.

Sure enough, Augustus gave eh a funny look. "Mom. Dad cuts the dinner. You know that. And everybody gets some, just in case they come."

As usual, Hope bit back a sob and nodded, passing Walther a plate. "We start with the twins." She whispered to him. "Then Auggy, me, then you." Hopefully, he would stick to the order. Hope knew it could be confusing, eating dinner at the house, with Auggy.

August was a very particular boy, after all.

He eyed the plate and then looked up to the woman, having thought this to be some sort of sick game were it not that their son was orchestrating this. He carefully set about moving to see to his task, cutting the lasagna as ordered. Two pieces, for Helene and Caroline, and then one for August, the man placing it before his son before kissing the other's head. It was beyond a blessing to be able to do that.

Then he did the same for Hope, quickly placing it before her before moving back to the food, not wanting to look at her and risk losing what calm had come over him. Just like normal, he repeated in his mind, the phrase a sick mockery of his life.

His labored breathing revealed his state as he stood over the lasagna for a moment with his own portion on his place, biting his lip and holding back tears before he dared to return to his seat, beside his son and Hope.

He glanced to his son, waiting for August to give him the go-ahead to eat.

August beamed and said a prayer to Uncle Josef, then nodded, ad began eating. Hope glanced to Walther and smiled as Augustus focused his entire being on eating.

"Every dinner. Without fail. Five plates, five meals." She whispered and sighed. "It's...a painful reminder. Daily." She shook her head. "He...he's still a little boy, in his head, one that has to have everything just so. I should never have...he's so....he's in therapy." She confessed.

"The doctors want him in an Institution but I wont' let them. He's my boy." All she had left. "I'm sorry. About all this." She whispered. "I don't mean for it to..."

She had thought he must be dead. "The first handler let me still have pictures, updates on how you were all doing. The second handler only pictures. The third tried to cut off all...all...he died." She admitted quietly. She had lost her temper and wasn't proud of it. "Kampf ordered me personally to cut off all contact, all news of you, of the girls." She had been denied even reports on if they were alive or not.

Hope hated her job.

Hope looked down at the last scrapbook of her time on this planet, and then sighed. It has been some time since she had joined this world, these people. This Snow had gotten her absolution, and this Wing her empire. She had adopted children, and even given birth. And now…it was time to move on. She put away the last scrapbook and locked the door to the closet as she stepped out of it. Dressed again in her fatigues and a tank top, the woman hesitated, and removed her goggles, before hanging them from the doorknob. “That’s the last of that life. “ She whispered and looked away, closing her eyes. It was always hard, deliberately leaving a life behind, but it was, Hope knew, for the best. They’d begin to notice soon, notice that she wasn’t like other Travelers or other Erutin.

The Erutin smiled as she recalled the memories. Walther. Norrington. Kendra. Felix. They had all been such wonderful lovers. Rachel. Henry. Bo. Augustus. The twins. They had been such good kids. She had tried to help raise them well, though had known for centuries now that when it came to motherhood, she wasn’t the best. Still, she’d keep an eye out for them, and their children. It was only right.

The woman shook her head and then sighed. “It’s past time.” She reminded herself. “Far past time. You had sworn, you fool. After Pukak, you had sworn no more children.” Children. They complicated things. Even after she stopped keeping a personal eye out, she’d have to keep her devices looking, keeping an eye out in case one was ever born like her.

The woman checked herself over, and then nodded. It was time. A new realm, new worlds awaited. Was this what Max- no, what Vexar felt like? Did he choose to do this, or was he given no choice. She hadn’t been given one when the time came to move on from Pukak. Uncertain, Hope moved to the closest farther back in the deep hallway. Each door she passed represented a life she led, a world, a realm she had influenced. And now? Now it was back to the beginning. Hope quietly opened the very first door, and stripped of the fatigues and the tank top, folding them gently and putting them together, boots on top, on one of the shelves. She dressed in a flowing pale pink dress in its place, and slipped two golden anklets on her left ankle.

It had been some time since she dressed so. What age was the question? Hope closed her eyes and sighed, shrinking in size, until once more she was on the cusp of puberty. This was something she was certain Vex couldn’t do, to reset his age like this. Hope had always been way more fun than that fuddy duddy anyway. She smiled brightly to herself, clothes suiting this new form. “Right. Memory things locked up, dressed in a pretty new dress. I’m almost ready to go again. Uncertain, she eyed herself in the long mirror hanging on the back of the closet door. “Oh! Hair and eyes! I gotta change how I look.”

With her eyes closed, she concentrated. Chin length dark brown hair and dark brown eyes. That sounded good. A button nose, and full lips. That would do it. Now all she lacked was a new name. The woman considered things carefully. Names were precious things. “Nadya. Nadya….Alexeev? That sounds great.” She said and smiled, weaving a personal history for herself, carefully, oh so carefully.

“There. Only one thing left.” She whispered, and then looked to the markings on her left hand. On an Erutin of this place, it would have been nanites that made those marks. For her, it had been a tattoo. This dimensions Hope was alive and downtrodden somewhere, no doubt, if she had ever existed at all. Nadya knew of very few ways to get rid of a tattoo. This, she reflected, was going to hurt. A laser could remove the tattoo, of course, but it would still leave discolored skins.

Acid…acid would provide a cover story, she decided, and in time, she well knew, heal just fine, even the scar fading away to healthy skin. Until then, well. Gloves worked.

“Ship. Please purge all tracking devices, and prepare to remove the tattoo in the med lounge. I’ll also need…I’ll need an acid, ship, strong enough to burn my skin.” Though she’d only have to hold her hand down. The young girl strode to the med lounge. This would hurt, so very much. But sometime, extreme measures had to be taken.

After she had recovered, she’d have to hide the ship away once more, on some asteroid drifting through lightyears of uninhabited space. That was for the best, after all, that the ship never be discovered, this ship, with its impossible hall full of memories of lifetimes well lived. “Alright. Time to get back in the game, and change some destinies, hopefully for the better. You got this Nadya.” Just like she had this every other time. First step, erase the last signs that she had ever been Hope Anona, hero of the empire. Now, she was just Nadya Alexeev, orphaned human.

Fortunately, the precognitive nature of Marlene's mind allowed her to anticipate some of the hiccups, and buffer her mind to protect itself against the incoming onslaught of data. Marlene's mind processed it quickly, by buffering it out, and focusing her own thoughts. Marlene also managed to keep her own consciousness relatively isolated, while focusing on the mental 'White room' that she tried to keep them in.

But the sadness was overwhelming, the woman sensed a lot of pain, a lot of sadness in the Princess's mind, and it had a profound, and intimate effect on her own psyche.

Halena let her into her mind, and Halena took the first step towards the path to enlightenment, so now it was time for Marlene to open up to the other, to let her own mind cascade fourth.

Marlene smiled, and telepathically spoke.

"There's more, I'm going to let you in." She wanted to see if Halena could truly comprehend the steps she was about to take, but she knew that she would be completely opening her own mind to the child before her, Aschen state secrets, everything. It didn't matter, the Asylians could wipe the Aschen out, and so she took a gamble.

Marlene closed her eyes, and opened her mind to Halena. The Child would be bombarded with a sensation of pure agony, but it wasn't her own, the agony she felt was that of Marlene, the agony of being separated from ascension, but there was more, there was thousands of years worth of memories.

Marlene's childhood was the most traumatic, memories of the Aschen Confederation invading her homeworld of Yellowstone, memories of Aschen soldiers moving through the streets, door to door, dragging people out, the memories were clear, and they were vivid.

Yellowstone gave way to the lush, verdant green of Langara, and the emotions of sadness, and hatred followed. Hatred for a man that was a father figure, a man that visited unspeakable evil that left the child scarred, there was pain, a great deal of agonizing pain.

The memories were like a maelstrom, some were significant events in Marlene's life, like her first kiss. Others were the minutia of her day to day interactions on Langara.

Marlene was standing in front of a strange man in a black suit.

"Do you solemnly swear to protect and defend the interests of the Aschen Confederation of Planets, as an Agent of the Langaran Defense Agency, with every fiber of your being?"

"I do."

The Chaos of memories shifted, a memory of Marlene standing in a large room overlooking a console, and a massive device of some kind.

"They call it the Potentia, Project Shimshon, a device that, if activated will wash clean all life from this galaxy. If our society falls, we'll take this galaxy with it.."

Marlene looked down in the memory, taking a small, yet technical looking crystal into her hand, She worked quickly to suppress it, but the memory had already flowed fourth.

Another memory followed, they were in a bar of some kind, arguing passionately over someone, the woman in Marlene's mind was named Ari, they were arguing over a Randin Kaye before Ari stabbed Marlene in the chest, searing pain followed, followed by more emotions of agony, and then calm, as Marlene gazed upon a being enrobed in a brilliant white light, another ascended being.

"The success or failure of your deeds, does not add up to the sum of your life. Your spirit cannot be weighed. Judge yourself by the intentions of your actions, and by the strength with which you faced the challenges that have stood in your way. The Universe is vast and we are so small. There is really only one thing we can ever truly control... whether we are good or evil."

There was a warm light, the feeling of peace, an absolute, and overwhelming flood of knowledge, and understanding that was now being shared freely with the child. Marlene's own ascension, as she shed her physical body was a unique sensation, as she lay there on the bar floor, dying.

The white realm returned, Marlene having stemmed the flow from her own mind. Physically, the blonde was holding her head, exhaustion had begun to set in, as she relived the last few thousand years in her mind, her fragile psyche overwhelmed. One thing Halena would learn, was a hair's breadth kept Marlene from true insanity.