Snippet #1784295

((I love the Zelda games, but I have to do it. She’s too much of a bitch not to.))

Alice snorted a little, trying to hold it back as Kafei pulled out his own blade, but failing miserably as she laughed, “Wow, kid…wow. Okay…” She tried to calm herself down as she brushed a tear from her eye, “Okay, I’m good. I’m good. Alright, pink aaaaaaand green. Pink and green. Should I? Should I really? Oh, it’s just too priceless. That is probably the gayest sword I’ve ever seen in my entire life, and I’ve seen dildo swords, kid. Dildo swords. Wielded by gimps.” She said, laughing a little again at the image of the army of gimps running down the street with dildo swords. She chuckled a few more times before brushing the smirk off her lips.

She touched the blade of the weapon, as if to see if the thing was real. After running her fingers on the edge and drawing blood, she drew her fingers back and sucked on them a little before waving her fingers in the air, “Gay, but functional at least, I suppose. That actually hurt a little.” As she spoke, the cuts on her fingers sealed and she looked down at them, “Okay, so, let’s put our swords away, or I’m going to shoot both of you. I’m not usually one for talking my way out of problems, but let’s try and get some information here. Mr. Hangover here thinks we’re in an alternate dimension, and the kid is from some place I’ve never heard of. Fun.” She shook her head at this and pinched the bridge of her nose, trying to think. Her head hurt, she could really use a blunt, and she had a very, very itchy trigger finger at the moment.