Hikaru slept, dreaming about better days when both of her parents were still alive. Times when she lived in Britain with her older brother, before she ever dreamed of visiting Japan, before she even met her grandmother. Her family had been happy. They weren't rich or anything, but they had everything they needed and that was enough. They loved each other dearly and spent plenty of time bonding as a family. Her older brother would walk her to get ice cream on their way home from school and her father would take the kids to the park every Sunday while they waited on their mother to get off of work, then they would have a picnic.
However her pleasant memories were ruined when images of their car crash engulfed her dream turning it into an unpleasant nightmare. Hikaru tossed and turned on her bed, until she fell out. Thankfully falling out of bed tore her from the horrible flashbacks her nightmare reminded her of, "Mom!" Hikaru shouted out in English, her British accent pronounced as she desperately called out in her grogginess, completely forgetting for a moment that her mother had been dead for quite some time. Reality soon returned to Hikaru, reminding her where she was and that her mother was beyond her reach. Her chest tightened, as it did every time she had that nightmare. It was like losing her mother and father all over again on a constant loop. She only hoped it would never wake up her dorm mates. She didn't feel like explaining to them that she had no parents. Mom... Dad... I still need you... This place is so different... I... I miss you so much... her entire body trembled as she sat in the floor, staring down at the wood beneath her. It was cold and hard, her body still aching from her unexpected impact with it.
There were tears in her eyes as she sat up on the floor and Hikaru wiped them away on her sleeve, doing her best to recompose herself. She wasn't sure where her dorm mates were, but they could always arrive at any time so she didn't want to be found crying like a baby. She'd never get to live it down, especially since she was supposed to be a guy. In the male community, guys were NOT allowed to cry, it was weak. She couldn't afford to come across as weak. It would put her at risk in so many ways.
Hikaru went to the dorm's bathroom that the three bedrooms shared, splashing her face with cold water in attempt to pull herself together. While she wasn't crying anymore, she was still feverish, and if anything she felt like she was burning up even more after her nap instead of less. She felt she was likely experiencing a cold, but she didn't have the time to accept such a thing. Classes would resume in nearly twenty minutes. Since going to the nurse was out of the question, she would have to brave it or skip class entirely. Mom... It's times like this that I wish you were still here more than anything... She thought to herself, collapsing on the sofa in the dorm's living room that Yoichi, Kazuki, and she would share. At this point her fever was beginning to cloud her judgement, but she was alone in the dorm so it seemed safe enough to take another nap there. Her breathing was slightly forced, and she loosened her tie and unbuttoned a few of her shirt's buttons exposing her collarbone. It felt nice to have a little air hitting her skin, even if it was only a little.