Mountain Brook

---

---

"Mm. Enough money to learn how to make decent coffee," he teased gently. He still wasn't 100% okay, but he was better. Especially because they didn't have to deal with any of their problems now. They could just pretend that everything was okay, even though it really wasn't. His life was falling apart, but here, it felt okay.

"I honestly like the sound of that," he mused, grinning a little at the sound of Alby's laugh. "But somebody would end up getting nervous and come charging back up here and drag us down," he added. It would probably be Scarlet- but mentioning that would only make their problems feel real. "Well, time to face the music," he said, getting to his feet and holding out a hand to pull Alby up.



God, she couldn't believe she was actually about to do this. She'd been hiding it for so long, and now her own body was being a traitor and exposing her.

"Basically, my body just hates my guts and is trying to destroy me from the inside out. Leukemia. I'm on treatment, but... it's still not pretty," she admitted, shrugging a little. She wasn't going to admit how bad it was. She couldn't do that to Bea. She couldn't do that to herself. "So, if you see me swallowing pills, it's nothing illegal," she joked.

"Your turn," she said, clearing her throat a little.

---

---

Bea looked at her with delicate but dark and secretive eyes, which only slightly widened into deep brown abysses when she heard of Charlie's affliction and she immediately felt terrible for the girl, and guilty. Charlie was thin and sickly out of twisted chance, Beatrice was ill and skeletal because she was selfish and thick.

"Fuck, Charlie I am so...I am so sorry," She replied honestly, she genuinely looked saddened too- possibly even emotional but it was hard to tell. "Does Ash-" She stopped herself. "No, he doesn't. I don't blame you actually. The fact you've gone through this alone, that's so selfless Charlie. I kinda admire it actually but if I'm the only one you've told and you need someone, even if you just want me to hold your hair back for you or something; I'm around," She told her gently; not wanting to express so much sympathy Charlie felt patronised and pitied but feeling the need to ensure Charlie knew she had someone to fall back on.

Bea looked down, her features veiled by shame. "I'm...I'm..." She stuttered a little and she couldn't look at Charlie. She squeezed her eyes shut and turned her head to the ground, she couldn't say it to her face. She was too ashamed. "I'm...I, I am addicted to benzodiazepine drugs, specifically Librium. I think I have a slight dependency on alcohol and it's all given mental health issues. I'm sorry- I feel terrible admitting I'm sick because I'm stupid when you're a genuinely good person, in this position because of some kind of awful fate, I'm sorry. So if you see me swallowing pills, it's everything illegal," She sighed sorrowfully.

Meeting Charlie had made her feel so stupid, dependent, needy and weak- she didn't know how to come back from this, how to defend herself. She felt like she should try and justify her drug abuse, but anxiety was no excuse for taking psychoactive drugs. She could blame bullying, shift the blame but that was her excuse for being a bitch to Scarlet. There was no right, moral, justified or understandable excuse for an 18 year old, aspiring artist, self-credited grunge goddess to be addicted to such dangerous drugs before she even finished Art college. There was no excuse for her not to be achieving A* at college because she was iconic amongst artists within her genre, especially for her age but she was only scraping A's because her mind was in it, there was no excuse for her not getting out of bed or leaving her house, a hangover or low didn't count. There was no excuse for her to let everyone down so much, her parents, Alby- herself. There was no excuse for any of it and thinking about it made her stomach wretch with guilty and pure dismay over what she'd become.

"I...I just beg, I know you'll judge me to the moon and back for this but please, tell whoever you like in the world but don't tell Alby. When the time comes for him to find out, let me tell him because he's my best friend; the only person I can even hope will understand," She mumbled, refusing to look up at Charlie for fear she'd see amusement, disgust or loathing in her eyes.

---

---

Bea looked at her with delicate but dark and secretive eyes, which only slightly widened into deep brown abysses when she heard of Charlie's affliction and she immediately felt terrible for the girl, and guilty. Charlie was thin and sickly out of twisted chance, Beatrice was ill and skeletal because she was selfish and thick.

"Fuck, Charlie I am so...I am so sorry," She replied honestly, she genuinely looked saddened too- possibly even emotional but it was hard to tell. "Does Ash-" She stopped herself. "No, he doesn't. I don't blame you actually. The fact you've gone through this alone, that's so selfless Charlie. I kinda admire it actually but if I'm the only one you've told and you need someone, even if you just want me to hold your hair back for you or something; I'm around," She told her gently; not wanting to express so much sympathy Charlie felt patronised and pitied but feeling the need to ensure Charlie knew she had someone to fall back on.

Bea looked down, her features veiled by shame. "I'm...I'm..." She stuttered a little and she couldn't look at Charlie. She squeezed her eyes shut and turned her head to the ground, she couldn't say it to her face. She was too ashamed. "I'm...I, I am addicted to benzodiazepine drugs, specifically Librium. I think I have a slight dependency on alcohol and it's all given mental health issues. I'm sorry- I feel terrible admitting I'm sick because I'm stupid when you're a genuinely good person, in this position because of some kind of awful fate, I'm sorry. So if you see me swallowing pills, it's everything illegal," She sighed sorrowfully.

Meeting Charlie had made her feel so stupid, dependent, needy and weak- she didn't know how to come back from this, how to defend herself. She felt like she should try and justify her drug abuse, but anxiety was no excuse for taking psychoactive drugs. She could blame bullying, shift the blame but that was her excuse for being a bitch to Scarlet. There was no right, moral, justified or understandable excuse for an 18 year old, aspiring artist, self-credited grunge goddess to be addicted to such dangerous drugs before she even finished Art college. There was no excuse for her not to be achieving A* at college because she was iconic amongst artists within her genre, especially for her age but she was only scraping A's because her mind was in it, there was no excuse for her not getting out of bed or leaving her house, a hangover or low didn't count. There was no excuse for her to let everyone down so much, her parents, Alby- herself. There was no excuse for any of it and thinking about it made her stomach wretch with guilty and pure dismay over what she'd become.

"I...I just beg, I know you'll judge me to the moon and back for this but please, tell whoever you like in the world but don't tell Alby. When the time comes for him to find out, let me tell him because he's my best friend; the only person I can even hope will understand," She mumbled, refusing to look up at Charlie for fear she'd see amusement, disgust or loathing in her eyes.

"Oh, you asshole," Alby muttered, a reluctant smile lighting up his still hidden face. Finally, he pulled back a little, shot Sam a look. "Although, if you think my coffee is terrible, then that means it really was me you were coming back for, all that time." He wanted to pop off something sarcastic about daring someone to come looking for them, but...it didn't really seem the time. How did one go about making jokes concerning their sex life...when one had slept with someone else?

Guilt was an odd, gross feeling.

Still, Alby sighed and took the hand that was offered to him, puling himself to his feet. Facing the music meant facing the fact that their problems were real...but he figured he was going to have to deal with that eventually. So he nodded, kept Sam's hand in his, and started downstairs.

He found Scarlet an Ash first, which...he just really didn't want to deal with. Because for one thing: awkward. For another, Scarlet just had a lot of feelings...and Alby not knowing how to deal with those feelings was part of the reason why they were in this mess to begin with. "Hope you enjoyed the show, Ash," he joked, reluctant to let go of Sam's hand just yet. "We only get that dramatic on Saturdays and every other Thursday so, count yourself lucky."

He caught Scarlet's gaze and felt his smile drop a little, but not disappear. "We're okay," he offered. "We should probably talk later but...not right now, alright?" He felt like he said that to her a lot, but he also felt like there was only so much he could drag Sam through at one time...and it wasn't like any of them are going anywhere for awhile.

---

---

"Well, that and the fact that everybody else made great coffee," he teased. He found himself a little glad when Alby didn't drop his hand. It made it a little easier to forget that everything else that had happened. Well, that and it was a reminder that he had one less secret to keep. He didn't have to keep Alby a secret any more.

He just laughed at Alby's comment about drama, but found himself completely unable to look at Scarlet. "Screw this, I'm getting a beer," he said, squeezing Alby's hand briefly before letting go and going over to the fridge. "Who's for a drink?" He asked, holding up a chilled bottle of beer.



She shrugged at Bea's comments. "I'm honestly not that selfless- I left my mom at home to worry about me because I wanted to go travelling. And... yeah. I don't want pity, you know? If I can't beat this, then I'm still going to fight and stay myself for as long as possible." She laughed a little at Bea's offer. "I might take you up on that sometime, you know."

She fell silent at Bea's revelation, and stayed silent for a few seconds after Bea finished talking, still processing what she'd just heard. Part of her was angry at Bea- after all, it was her own fault that she'd ended up this sick. But then Bea's words about mental health issues came back to her, and Charlie found herself completely unable to be angry.

"Bea, you're sick too. Addiction is an illness, and if it's because of your mental health, then that just makes you even sicker, you know? Okay, I think I win this one, but that doesn't mean your problems are any less. Even if you did get yourself into this mess. And as long as you don't mention a godforsaken thing to Ash, I'll keep my mouth shut to Alby," she said, smiling at Bea.

"But Bea, seriously, this isn't something you should go through by yourself. You could end up dead. Things aren't going to get any better if you just keep your mouth shut, you know? Especially not with something like addiction. I know I only just met you, but I really like you, and it's not hard to tell that pretty much everyone else likes you too. And don't you dare ever feel bad about calling me at any time, okay? I'll call you when I feel like shit, and you call me whenever you need a chat. Deal?"

---

---

She nodded understandingly, but after she confessed she couldn't look at her. Saying it out loud made everything sound so much more criminal and villainous. In her own mind, it wasn't her fault. She was bullied, she wanted to fit in, it went too far.

"If it makes anything less stupid and me less easy to loathe, anxiety became before addiction- but you are right it's my own fault. Even if I didn't mean for it, want it or welcome it- maybe the way I felt at the start and my situation wasn't entirely fault but what I did after that was. I'm sorry- you'd be within your own rights to hate me for it but I'm fighting it as much as I can. I didn't bring any with me, if I go all weekend it'd be the first I've done since I was 17," She admitted.

She smiled sadly at her. "Thank you Charlie," She uttered quietly.

"I know, I just can't put it on them y'know? I could, I nearly have before but I don't know. I can't tell them now," She murmured. "Thank you Charlie, deal." She answered simply, relaxing again just slightly. "I'm sorry Charlie, for my dickheadness and for what you're going through, I just wanted to say to be honest with you," She replied running a hand through her heavy dark hair.

"Shall we go back? I don't know about you but I could really do with a drink and probably a hug from my best friend too," She laughed softly at her immaturity, soft nature and childishness. She smiled at the other girl as the conversation turned to silence and suddenly her energy and spirit seemed to rush back. "Come on, fuck the bags. It'll be far more entertaining to try and bring them in after a few drinks," She joked before leading the way back inside and shouting at her best friend; "Alby Bloody Johnson, get your ass over here," She shouted looking for him as she walked back inside, looking for him without an ounce of patience.

"I might be a boxer but by now means am I a fighter,"

Gum | Moose Blood || We Had A Pact | Creeper || Figuring It Out | SWMRS

---

---

He chuckled lightly at Alby's comment and shrugged it off. "Well, consider me honoured then," He scoffed in humour. He smiled at them boyishly, a quirk in his expression. At the offer of a beer, he considered it for a very long time.

He wasn't sure if he could allow it with how serious his boxing was getting it now but could he let go for one weekend? He was so uncertain but eventually decided to go with it.

"Sure, thanks Sam," He replied after a while.

"How you guys been anyway I haven't seen-" He was cut off by a Bea bombarding her way back inside, demanding the presence of her best friend. He laughed a little heartily, leaving the conversation he'd gone to start to die because Bea clearly wanted to talk to Alby a lot more than he did, so he let it slide and sat back down with Charlie as she came in.

"You alright?" He asked her gently, trying not to sound too happy about seeing her because he'd been nervous more recently he was starting to give himself away.

Alby couldn't say he was surprised at all when Sam went for alcohol. In fact, he was a bit grateful, because beer sounded like a fantastic idea. He raised his hand to show he wanted one as well, even though he was pretty sure Sam would already know as much. It was going to be an interesting few days...

He nodded along at Scarlet's mention of food, but honestly wasn't hungry yet. His stomach was still a little upset over everything that had gone down. If she wanted to cook, that was fine, he'd let the others decide though.

He was happy to see Ash though, and was already smiling, ready to answer the usual 'it's been awhile' questions, when Bea's voice shouted out at him. Ah, he was wondering when she would come looking. For one thing, he hadn't seen her before he went on his trip, and for another...well, drama.

He grinned and nodded an apology to his friends before sticking his head out the doorway. "In here, love."

Whens he was close enough, Alby jerked her close, wrapping his arms around her too-small frame. She felt like home, and he was glad she was there. He definitely needed some time with her...if his life ever decided to chill the fuck out.

Beatrice
Candour
--------------------------------------------------------

“There is a wisdom of the head, and... there is a wisdom of the heart.”
― Charles Dickens, Hard Times
“There are darknesses in life and there are lights, and you are one of the lights, the light of all lights.”
― Bram Stoker, Dracula
“I was benevolent and good; misery made me a fiend. Make me happy, and I shall again be virtuous.”
― Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

---

---

When she heard Alby calling her from the hallway, she laughed a little gently and rushed over to hug him, she held on fiercely tight for a moment with more strength then you'd expect a girl of her size to have. She felt like she hadn't seen him properly for years, the last long conversation she remembered having with him was back before her police interview at his house, when he'd laid with his head on her lap, talking her through what to say and how to be; telling her it'd be fine but weeks down the line now, she hated to say nothing was anything better. In fact, everything was a lot worse but she didn't blame Alby or think negatively because of what he said because at the time, she'd needed to hear it and she'd believed it and it'd got her through, so in a way, he'd actually been right.

"You so owe me a joint and a catch up, I feel like I haven't seen you in a life time," She told him assertively, with a slight hint to the spirit she used to harbour so much more vividly. She couldn't really explain her emotional dependency on Alby but she understood it was great, if everyone on the planet would die but she could save one person, she'd say Alby because he was her greatest friend and the most important person in her life and she knew it was dramatic to say but she genuinely believed that. Nobody else (as cliché as she thought it sounded) really understood her properly or how her mind worked but Alby got that and she understood how he worked.

And he rolled a good joint.

There were a lot of perks to maintaining his friendship.

"I've missed you Alby," She admitted like the soft hearted person she really was underneath all her armour and sarcasm.

---

---

Sam tossed a beer across the room to Ash, grinning at him as he did so. Retrieving another two, he went over to Alby and Bea, holding one out to Bea and dangling the other in front of Alby's face. "Honestly, he's not that great. You should try dating him, it'll wear off fast," he said dramatically, rolling his eyes. However, it soon broke into a grin as he went over to the fridge to get another beer for himself.

In response to Scarlet, he shrugged. "I honestly don't mind Scarlet- if you want to cook, go ahead. I'll pass on grocery shopping, though," he said, going back over to Alby and Bea. He could hardly look at Scarlet- any time he did, all he could think about was what was to come, and that just made him anxious. It was much easier to forget when he didn't.



Charlie just laughed as Bea called out for Alby, following her in. She sank into a chair beside Asher as she came in. "Yeah, I'm good. You?" She asked, smiling at him. Even though she could still feel a bit of a dull ache in her back, she chose to ignore it. "I see what you mean by all the big personalities," she remarked, looking around and laughing a little. "I don't think there's been a moment's peace since I turned up here," she continued.

"I might be a boxer but by now means am I a fighter,"

Gum | Moose Blood || We Had A Pact | Creeper || Figuring It Out | SWMRS

---

---

He laughed a little in agreement with her, nodding gently at her comment before offering her a charming but boyish grin; "Yeah, I'm okay and yeah...I know, it is a bit intense but you get used to it but if it gets too much, I can drive us back to town anytime,"He did joke when they were discussing the amount of powerful personalities in the room but he genuinely meant his words. He hadn't started off in the group like the rest of them, Bea kind of adopted him and threw him in the deep end by dragging him to one of their parties after his third day in town.

"Did Bea go easy on you then? She's quite nice underneath," He chimed lightly, looking at her for a moment and accidentally catching her eye. She had big dark eyes and he sometimes thought that it might be one of his favourite things about her, forgetting her personality.

As he caught his beer from Sam he raised the bottle in thanks whilst shouting a brief; 'Cheers!'.

---

---

Beatrice
Candour
--------------------------------------------------------

“There is a wisdom of the head, and... there is a wisdom of the heart.”
― Charles Dickens, Hard Times
“There are darknesses in life and there are lights, and you are one of the lights, the light of all lights.”
― Bram Stoker, Dracula
“I was benevolent and good; misery made me a fiend. Make me happy, and I shall again be virtuous.”
― Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

---

---

"Oh shut up Sam, I've known him longer than you have. He's not that bad, you're just jealous he loves me more than you," She chimed teasingly, sticking her tongue out playfully before laughing it off with a small innocent smirk. It was moments like this when you could remember how innocent and genuine Bea really was without all her afflictions and illness. Maybe she was a bit rude, blunt occasionally aloof and judgemental but really, she was harmless completely harmless- just another girl who grew up too fast to make the right mistakes and not the wrong ones.

"You jealous Sammy? Do you want a cuddle too?" She teased jokingly reaching out and dragging him energetically into a ridiculous and half hearted group hug. "I love you too Sammy," She whined lightly, grinning light heartedly before he released the pair of them, winking once before she cracked open her beer.

She'd missed hanging out with Alby and Sam like this, sure they dated now and it kind of made her a third wheel but it didn't feel like that, she adored the pair of them and if they were being touchy feely in front of her, she'd have no problem interrupting by jumping on their backs or just generally being irrational and they'd forgive her, because it was her. It all just kind of worked. Alby was Bea's best friend but heaven forbid anything ever happened to him, it'd be Sam that she turned to which is why they worked as a group. In her opinion at least.