max chapman
full name: max david chapman
nicknames: em, maxie boy
age: 21
sexuality: pansexual
occupation: film and stage media major, minor in communications
hex: #99bbbb
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can you see the panic inside?
6/10 - dodie
nicknames: em, maxie boy
age: 21
sexuality: pansexual
occupation: film and stage media major, minor in communications
hex: #99bbbb
x
x
x
x
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can you see the panic inside?
6/10 - dodie
appearance:
max is undeniably striking. at 6'1", his height isn't that far beyond the average, and his frame is narrow but not remarkably so, and he's a healthy weight, if a tad on the thin side. what makes him distinctive is his light blue eyes and his white-blond hair. max has always been fair, despite what his dark eyebrows and lashes might indicate. when he was fifteen, he bleached his hair and dyed it a blonde so white, it was nearly silver. Combine this with his face and frame finally filling out, he was striking. he's got a jagged scar on the heel of his left hand from where he fell and got glass imbedded in it, as well as a scar stretching from his right ankle to halfway up his calf from being knocked off his bike. he's got three tattoos- outlines of a crescent moon and a rising sun on his left and right forearms respectively, just below the elbow, and a small outline of a geometric paper crane on above his heart.
max is almost constantly cold. as a result, he's usually found in loose-fitting jumpers, usually with a t-shirt underneath. he also branches out into bomber jackets and long-sleeved t-shirts if he feels like shaking things up a little. skinny jeans, usually ripped, are his pants of choice, and he's usually wearing vans or converse. when he's cold, he layers up and pulls on a beanie, but seldom wears scarves.
personality:
max has never exactly been the epitome of social grace. he's a little too shy, a little too anxious, a little too clumsy. there's a conscious swirl of anxious thoughts in his head, convincing him that he isn't wanted, that if he messes up even just one little thing everything will come crashing down around him and everyone will hate him. he tends to dissociate when he's extremely anxious, meaning that things stop feeling real to him. the only things that seems to quiet the thoughts is alcohol and drugs. he keeps it low-key, passing his alcohol habits as just liking a drink. he tells everyone the pills he takes on occasion are for migraines. they help him relax, help him laugh without fear of judgement, help him fit in with the people he wants to fit in with. he pretends he isn't being torn apart on the inside.
max has lived with this most of his life. but he can remember a bright teenage boy, one who laughed and joked and climbed trees and felt so alive. back when he thought his friends were real for life, that nothing could ruin their friendship. as shy and as anxious as he is, he's one of the best friends you could have if you just wear him down and show him he can trust you. he's loyal to a fault, even forgiving people when he shouldn't. he's the type of person to laugh at your joke just so you know somebody liked it, the type of person to make eye contact and nod to let you know somebody's still listening to your story.
but he's also got the facade of the popular kid down pat. it's changed since he got to college. it's the quiet joke in a class, the parties thrown in his apartment, the leaving the assignment to the last minute but still managing to ace it. keeping up this facade is doing nothing for his mental health, but it means nobody suspects anything. and that's the important thing.
max has lived with this most of his life. but he can remember a bright teenage boy, one who laughed and joked and climbed trees and felt so alive. back when he thought his friends were real for life, that nothing could ruin their friendship. as shy and as anxious as he is, he's one of the best friends you could have if you just wear him down and show him he can trust you. he's loyal to a fault, even forgiving people when he shouldn't. he's the type of person to laugh at your joke just so you know somebody liked it, the type of person to make eye contact and nod to let you know somebody's still listening to your story.
but he's also got the facade of the popular kid down pat. it's changed since he got to college. it's the quiet joke in a class, the parties thrown in his apartment, the leaving the assignment to the last minute but still managing to ace it. keeping up this facade is doing nothing for his mental health, but it means nobody suspects anything. and that's the important thing.
likes
✓ dramas ✓ binge-worthy tv shows ✓ diverse media ✓ seeing films in the cinema ✓ live music ✓ cocktails ✓ white wine ✓ working on the campus radio station
dislikes
✘ bad rom-coms ✘ being asked what he'll do with his major ✘ rodents ✘ xenophobes ✘ his accent being mocked ✘ bullies ✘ blood ✘ rain ✘ apple-flavoured candy
history
max's parents had only ever wanted one kid. but when his mother, ashley, found out she was pregnant again, they agreed that, yeah, two kids would be okay. maybe they'd be company for each other. but growing up, max knew exactly where he stood. he always seemed to have more chores to do, seemed to get in trouble for things his darling older brother, charlie, would have gotten away with. when they moved to the us, max dared hope things would improve. he was wrong. from the moment he walked into the class, a little too short, a little too thin, and with a "posh" british accent, all the class bullies saw was fresh meat. max's parents didn't care about his black eye, his sore chest. if he was walking and talking, it wasn't that bad, and he just needed to man up and get on with it.
with time, max found a group of friends that welcomed him with open arms. they were like him, outcasts too. by this point, the anxiety was already starting to sink it's teeth into max, but he genuinely believed they'd be friends forever. the bullying improved, but never really went away. at the end of his freshman year, he was nearly hospitalised following a bunch of them getting drunk and deciding to target max again. desperate for a change, max bleached and dyed his hair. over the course of the summer, he grew a foot and his frame filled out a little. suddenly, he was attractive, and had no clue what to do with the attention. having taken self-defence lessons, he managed to fight back, and the bullies lost interest. he stuck with his friends, but when everything went wrong, the popular kids pounced on the opportunity, an older boy taking max on as his "protegé". his friends saw this as betrayal and most cut him off.
it seemed that the top of the popularity ladder was a fragile place. max was convinced one wrong action would cause him to topple and fall, disgraced and alone. so he did what he could to stay there. he fell in love with parties, finding that it was the only place his brain seemed quiet. he got a reputation as a party boy who would do anything and sleep with anyone who looked at him. when he got to college, he found that the kids who were popular in high school weren't necessarily popular any more, so he adapted. constantly terrified he'd fall. the disaster in his hometown only made things worse for him, bringing his anxiety to a peak. he's been drinking more and taking xanax to help him cope, but the anxiety of falling is only worsening.
