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Calliope

Muse of Epic Poetry: "This poem would be better with aliens."

0 · 1,516 views · located in Purgatory.

a character in “Purgatory Remix”, as played by LovelyLisey

Description

Age: 4,172 years old

Backstage Pass: Is a muse.

Calliope is short and tiny. She has big brown eyes, and she would have long curly black hair, except that she cropped her hair and dyed it blue. Why? Because. She has a penchant for Gothic Lolita dresses because it makes her look cool, and because people are going to assume she's an evil little girl anyway. She has a tattoo of a fox on her upper arm, which she usually hides because otherwise people will try to make drug deals and/or arrest her.

Personality

Calliope is, actually, pretty normal. She tends to be on the quiet side, as she prefers to let other people dominate the conversation. However, she is not unfriendly, as it's hard to go over four thousand years without developing some social skills. She will go to any extreme to protect people that she cares about. Calliope is pretty nice, and she's even kind of wise. But she has a weakness.

Some people are addicted to drinking. Some people are addicted to gambling.

Calliope is addicted to adventure.

If given a choice, she will follow the path of most resistance. She will always follow the rabbit down the hole. If something exciting is happening in Purgatory, Calliope wants to be at the center of it. Fortunately, Calliope's definition of 'exciting' has gotten lax over the years, as alien invasions are a dime a dozen and there's always some bandit stealing pretty maidens away. However, if anything does capture Calliope's attention, she tends to become quite unlike herself. She will risk everything, just to see the adventure through.

History

Calliope is the muse of epic poetry, which means that her hobby is to go into the human world and inspire people to write poetry that is really freaking epic.

Most of the time, she runs Calliope's Tavern in Grand City.

If you want to know her full backstory, just go read up on Greek Mythology. It was pretty much like that. Except probably weirder. Because the truth is always weirder.

Recently, Calliope's adventures have consisted of her brief alliance with The Fox. When the angels abandoned Grand City for Heaven, Calliope hung out with The Fox because he seemed to be the only person trying to do something, although she was not sure what. Then she realized that he was, like, evil and stuff, so she turned tail and joined the Bureau instead. Of course, she soon became bored with the Bureau, and she went back to her tavern. The Bureau still sometimes calls on her for detective work, although she hasn't been very helpful recently. However, the new 'soul murders' have piqued her interest...

Calliope has heightened reflexes and strength as the result of being an immortal creature. She also can fight pretty well with a sword. People often critique her for being cliche for using a sword, but her defense has always been, "Hey! Beowulf taught me!"

So begins...

Calliope's Story

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Calliope tried to hide her embarrassment, but a blush came out before she could hide it. What kind of experienced adventurer was she? "No, I, erm...well, I was distracted by the black rain...yeah, let's open it..." Calliope opened the box, to reveal an ordinary interior with a dancing ballerina. No music, however. "Well, that was an anticlimax," said Calliope.

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"I don't think so. At least, I haven't seen anyone die from it yet." Calliope pointed at a blank-faced man shuffling down the lane. "See, he seems fine. Although...a little..." She cocked her head. Something was strange with that man. And he was heading straight towards them. "Olivia, dear, maybe you should get back."

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"I don't know. It's just a feeling. Hmmm." The man lumbered up to Calliope and grabbed her arm. Calliope did nothing, staring at it, wondering what would happen next.

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"Nope," answered Calliope. "He's a bit forward, isn't he?" Suddenly, the mab bit her arm. "Ow!" yelled Calliope, yanking he arm away. "He just bit me. What the heck?" Does the black rain contain rabies or something? Or... As the man looked at her with blank eyes, Calliope began to understand. She'd seen his like in movies before. "Zombies," breathed Calliope, backing away, holding her arm. "Awesome."

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"Why?" Calliope continued to back away, clutching the music box to her chest and feeling very naked without her sword. "Do you think I might turn into a zombie?" She grinned, more than a little deliriously. "What fun. I've never been a zombie before."

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"Not at the moment. My arm hurts, though. Can you be a dear and fetch my sword? I don't want him to bite you too."

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Unfortunately, the zombie had injured her dominant arm, which meant that Calliope would have to hold and swing her sword with her left hand. She was not accustomed to this, and she was not entirely sure that she would be able to hit her target. Still, Calliope did not have much difficulty with the man. She put the music box down on a nearby table, charged, and cut his head off. The headless zombie continued, undeterred. Even Calliope thought that was gross.

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"But it's already inside!" Calliope ran and shut the door. "Good plan, Olivia! Now we've trapped it!"

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"But we just trapped it!" protested Calliope. "You want to let it free again - no, I need to have this body to dissect!" I need to have this body to dissect was one of Calliope's top I-want-to-say-this-at-some-point-in-my-life lines. She felt giddy at actually saying it. In a completely over-dramatic and unnecessary fashion, Calliope jumped on a table, and then vaulted off the table, bringing her sword down and splitting the zombie's body in half. The zombie did not move any longer. Calliope stood in a pool of blood and guts, looking pleased with herself. "I think I got it," she said.

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Calliope stroked her chin. "I think," she said, "that purgatory is under zombie attack." This was another line she'd always secretly wanted to say. She looked down at the zombie, or rather, the pieces of the zombie. "Crap. How am I going to dissect this?"

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Calliope looked deflated. "Why wouldn't you want to dissect a zombie?" She countered. "Maybe I could find out the source. Like...something different about the blood, or, scars from some satanic ritual or something fun like that..."

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"I'll go get the body bags," said Calliope, stepping into her room. She returned with gigantic black trash bags. "Just scoop up those bits and put them in here. We'll mop the blood afterwards." Just then, a knock came on the door. But more like a slam. "More company?" wondered Calliope aloud.

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"Don't be so squeamish," chastised Calliope as she got the door. Three more blank-looking people came shuffling through the door, nearly knocking Calliope over. "[i]Oooooooh[i]," cooed Calliope excitedly.

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The three zombies started to head towards Olivia, as she was the loudest and most visibly alive person in the room. Calliope withdrew her sword again, as well, charging down one of the zombies. But the other two were still about to reach the table that Olivia was on -

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"Olivia, hit them with the pointy end! It's worked for me before!"

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"That's the idea!" said Calliope cheerfully, hacking away at the legs of the second zombie. This is going to be so much to clean up...

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Olivia was quite clearly misunderstanding the purpose of a sword. Calliope has taken care of the first two zombies at this point, and she was about to get rid of the third one when she changed her mind. If Olivia didn't at least know how to defend herself against zombie attacks, then where would she be? She had injured her zombie, but it was still moving. "You can do it! Just cut it into so many pieces that it can't move anymore."

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"Congratulations, Olivia! You killed your first zombie! Now you can help me clean it up, too."

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Probably best not to push the issue. Olivia had already been through a lot today. "Okay, I'll take care of it. But a little bit later. I need a rest." Calliope closed and locked the door. Then she sat at the bar and poured herself a stiff drink. "I'm not opening the door for anyone for a while. That was quite exhausting. And I'm not sure that I can even use it for a poem."

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"Yes, it's just a little too gross," agreed Calliope, showing startling common sense for once. "It' the sort of depressing thing that JJJ would write about..." She glanced back at the music box abandoned on the table. "I wonder why zombies, why now?"