Snippet #2595929

The party continued to flow around him, voices mixing interchangeably. This was where he had always felt more comfortable, surrounded by people. But he didn't feel happy at all.
Everything stung as if he has been plunged in lemon juice and all the little wounds he never knew had, started to make themselves known.
What next? Getting tripped over and stabbed in the back with cutlery? Poison in his drink?

The truth of the situation had finally hit him. This sort of thing would happen again and again and it would end the exact same way every time until it didn't.

"Calm down Falke, I haven't done anything to you. All I wanted to know was the obvious questions. But if none of you have the common decency to at least tell me the answers, I'll go find it somewhere else."
His voice deepened slightly, getting huskier and heavily accented. Tiredness flooded him. He wanted to go home. Or at the very least lie down and sleep for a long time.

He was tired of them childishly hiding information from him and then scolding him for wanting to know it.
Even if he was quiet and did as he was told (as he always did) there would still be someone glaring at him. It was always lose/ lose for him.

It was like schoolyard bullying, and he wasn't going to bite.

Falke just walked away as if he couldn't hear him.
In fact, he knew that Falke could, but that he was ignoring him the way he always did.
Even when Xabier had tried to be friends with him, it was the same scenario.
He was tired of running after people trying to get them to like him.
And if Falke was like this when Xabier was upset, then he wasn't worth the effort.

None of them were.

Tick

He thought of his family back home. The people who no matter how many fights they had, loved him. That had taught him that he had to pick his fights carefully and right now this fight wasn't worth it.
Xabier had to let go of all the anger he felt for the moment so he could do the right thing.
Go do whatever he could to heal the wounds in the group. Both physical and metaphorical.

Falke, as much as it was unnecessary, was right. They were in public. He would have to hold up his anger (again) and let it out later.
He couldn't pretend that he had responsibility over other people's actions. But he sure as hell had responsibility over his own actions.
And for a while now he had been selfish. His relationship with Harper was selfish. They both did things that caused harm, but Xabier's actions were his own responsibility. It was about time that he stood up and faced them like a man.

Dorian's silence didn't change Xabier's opinion of him, instead it reinforced the differences between them. Xabier, as much as he tried, couldn't stay quiet about these things.

Turning on his heel, he wondered why he even went to the other dark haired guy in the first place. He wouldn't do it again anytime soon.
He spoke with the well dressed noblemen for a few minutes with a fake smile plastered on his face. It was funny because he had never felt the need to pretend to be happy until recently.
It was annoying, but he was put into a corner. If he started to kick off, he wouldn't be able to go to Harper.... Shit. Harper.... He remembered a random fact that you should never leave someone in that situation alone otherwise....
"Bathroom." He excused himself from anyone who cared to enquire where he was going.

Departing from the well-spoken company he headed towards the room where Harper, Tallyho and Kyle had been with Haru.
"Leave the past in the past? Qué? Vete a la mierda." He spat out the words fast and loud. It wasn't fair. He couldn't see anything fair about this whole thing.
However docile he was in English, his Spanish was always more passionate which usually meant more angry. He missed being able to just speak his mind without having to constantly translate.
All alone in the hallway with no one around to hear him, he swore and swore. Words that he didn't even knew he knew came pouring out.
He knew if he went into the room at that moment he would probably just blow up at the first person. Best to let some out now.
He paused at the door handle wondering if he could interrupt what was going on. It was of course, Haru's surprisingly calm order to leave that had driven him away. He wouldn't mess with Haru out of both self preservation and respect for his efforts looking after them.

Haru, who was always so blatantly in charge, was still in charge yet seemed more tired and deflated than usual. Something was wrong. A little warning sign popped up but he brushed it aside.
Harper, first. Then finish this issue with Kyle and Tallyho. After that he could figure things out.

He walked into the room where Harper had been, the door closing neatly behind him. He had no shadows by his side.
There was only the two blonde month warriors in the room with him. Harper missing.
Maybe Haru was talking to him alone.
They seemed to be talking amicably between themselves.

A million ways for him to open up the floor for conversation.

He walked past them looking around for a third figure. There was someone he had to make sure was alright before trying anything else.
Walking past them again he went outside and found a lone figure sitting in the shadows.

Lillian was there too. She was telling someone about hiding in the shadows. Xabier wouldn't be deterred by the dark though. In fact it was the most comforting sensation all night.

A jolt of fear and then relief. He sat down beside the figure, eyes quickly appraising for injuries.

Noticing it.
Looking away.

Xabier paused. He was so bloody angry, but his relief took over.
"It's just me."
He reached over and ran his fingers through Harper's hair softly in an attempt to soothe.
"It's going to be alright."