Snippet #2622211

Xabi's words fell on him like rain, but Harper was an umbrella. As much as he wanted to let them soak in, the drops rolled off.

He planted his face in Xabi's shoulders, but despite the encouragement to cry, Harper's tears were few. He could feel himself emptying out. Shelling. The sounds of merriment behind them faded out, and all he focused on was the sound of his breathing. Easy. His brain latched onto it, all his mental energy concentrating on smoothing out his exhales and inhales, rubbing out the bumps.

Slowly, other feelings entered. The wind on the back of his neck. The throbbing in his wrist. A dull pain behind his eyes. Xabi's shoulder bone hard against his forehead. Sweat rolling down his hands. How tight his belt really was. The fabric of his pants, which really were high-quality. He'd liked his first outfit better though. A shame he had ruined it.

The event seemed so long ago...a blurry picture at the end of an unfocused telescope. Yet...simultaneously it felt like it had just happened. Just a clashing of everything. Time was meaningless anyways. Reality an illusion. What even was real.

Maybe he had died. Maybe he had died three years ago, and this was the shitty afterlife. It definitely wasn't a new thought. And the more he considered it, the more it made sense.

Dante he thought to himself I am Dante. Paradise fucking found.

For whatever reason, he found the thought funny. Not rip-roaring hilarious, but almost an instinctual, hollow funny. Cold and empty. Desperate. A smile spread on his face, and he snorted through his nose, hoping that Xabi would mistake it for something else.

Hoping that Beatrice would mistake it for something else.

He sat up when Xabi suggested going inside, smile sliding off. He nodded. "Sure," he said, voice still weird, and he stood up, breathing deep. He glanced back at the dance hall. Sniffed hard. Watery eyes narrowing slightly, but no tears threatening.

So...was this hell? Or purgatory? Was he traveling upwards, or down? Or both?

9th circle he decided. He didn't remember what was in the 9th circle, but it seemed to make the most sense. After what he'd just been through, the only way had to be up, right?

After a few more seconds, he looked back at Xabi, holding out a hand and trying a hand. "After you, my dear."