Snippet #1154621

Joseph numbly shuffled along with the group of survivors, body moving mechanically. The entire time the rest of the group was talking and making plans Joseph felt the familiar icicle of emotion filling him, he hadn't felt that way since the death of his father years ago but he recognized it and knew that it was bad, *OK, I'll be numb and coldly logical for about another hour, but if I'm not careful I'll snap into the rage again and in this situation that would only kill me, just keep moving, fake it till you make it, fuck why did she die? it should have been me, oh no, it's happening.* Joseph looked around and was surprised to see that they were at the bomb shelter, people milling about and slowly filtering inside, Ralph and the others in charge were directing everybody to safety and Joseph remembered the conversation earlier where he was supposed to go with the others to gather weapons and fix up the bus. Walking stiffly over to Ralph, Joseph cleared his throat and waited until he has Ralph's attention. "Pardon the interruption but though we have make plans for gathering weaponry and transportation I forgot to ask if Ark's store happens to have much in the way of preserved food. If it doesn't I would request that I be allowed to make a small diversion in the plans and go to my house, which would be a rather large distance across open ground, or to the town hall again where I have a trunk full of preserved rations, all told if we are careful about it neither path should take more than ten or twenty minutes extra time round-trip." with slightly shaking hands Joseph pulled out his pack of cigarettes and pulled one out before lighting it up and offering one to Ralph, "I apologize for my nerves I tend to react poorly when unfortunate events happen." slowly letting the ritual of smoking take over Joseph fought with himself to keep out of the disastrous emotional path he was starting down.