wednesday 2nd september
at home
He smiled at her story, well able to remember that particular incident. Like all of his memories, though, it was like he was seeing them from another person's point of view or through a screen- like they weren't really from his life, like he was watching someone else's story. That had been way, way back, back before his brain decided to fuck itself up or his dad relapsed. Back when things were a lot better.
He also could remember the time that Bella had disappeared without telling anybody when they were all supposed to be going over to Celine's to hang out. An hour had passed, and she still hadn't turned up. She hadn't answered anyone's calls or texts, and Jamie had been starting to get majorly anxious. So they went out to find her and found her in those very woods. Jamie could still remember the fear of that afternoon.
But the thought of doing it in the future felt even more detached than his memories. Especially today of all days, he felt like if he lived to see the morning, he'd be doing well. But he couldn't tell Bella that.
"What about this weekend?" He asked. Going any further away than that seemed impossible. Even saying that he'd be in a fit state to go at the weekend seemed like he was setting his hopes to high. He felt like he was lying, saying that he'd be able to go. His stomach twisted suddenly as he thought of his father. He'd be leaving him in the house by himself, with only the occasional company from his mother passing through.
But assuming Jamie and Bella were still friends at the weekend, Jamie would need the time away.
He also could remember the time that Bella had disappeared without telling anybody when they were all supposed to be going over to Celine's to hang out. An hour had passed, and she still hadn't turned up. She hadn't answered anyone's calls or texts, and Jamie had been starting to get majorly anxious. So they went out to find her and found her in those very woods. Jamie could still remember the fear of that afternoon.
But the thought of doing it in the future felt even more detached than his memories. Especially today of all days, he felt like if he lived to see the morning, he'd be doing well. But he couldn't tell Bella that.
"What about this weekend?" He asked. Going any further away than that seemed impossible. Even saying that he'd be in a fit state to go at the weekend seemed like he was setting his hopes to high. He felt like he was lying, saying that he'd be able to go. His stomach twisted suddenly as he thought of his father. He'd be leaving him in the house by himself, with only the occasional company from his mother passing through.
But assuming Jamie and Bella were still friends at the weekend, Jamie would need the time away.