Erorn hadn't noticed James watching him until he spoke. He patted the space on the bed next to him to invite James to come sit next to him. He didn't look up at him. "I must have been pretty loud, huh?" He sighed. "I just don't know what's wrong with me. It's like no matter what I do it's always the wrong thing and there's always someone there to point it out. You're not really such a bad guy, so I figured what's the harm in being nice to you? But it wasn't just what you said that got to me, it was me. If Marcus was here he'd be furious that I even liked you. But then comes the painful realization that Marcus isn't here. So why the fuck do I still feel so bad about this? It's not like he's up in his castle crying his eyes out because I left him. He's probably banging that princess trying to forget I was ever there. He has the luxury of moving on, while I'm stuck here like a fool trying to learn how to win him back." He paused. He felt the tears coming but he didn't want to cry for Marcus anymore. "If he doesn't want me for who I am, if I have to act like a common whore, is it even worth it? Shouldn't he want me for me?" He turned to James. "Not that I don't appreciate what you're trying to do, but is there even a point? Say he does pick me, then what? Even if I keep up the act, there's no way he'll ever stand up to his father. And if I'm acting the way I have been, there's no way we won't get caught. It just feels like I'm being set up to fail. Maybe this is your plan for him, show him how you turned his man into the toy he wanted from the beginning, then make him realize that there's no way he can have him. I don't want to be a toy anymore. I know he loves me or at least he did. But maybe he shouldn't have. I seem to bring nothing but pain frustration to the men I fall for, that or death. Maybe I'm not meant to find love." He turned away from James. "I know this is a weakness. So I'm weak, who really fucking cares?" He barely managed to keep himself from crying. He was just done. "You want to know what my real weakness is? No one loved me after my parents died, except for my late first boyfriend, so I try to find it anywhere I can, even when it isn't there, even if I fall for someone who doesn't deserve my love. Because I'm scared, I'm terrified of going through anymore of my life alone and all I end up doing is hurting myself. I'm sorry I woke you, I'll try to be quieter." He pulled the covers up and laid back down.