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Fastus Captio

Everything is going acording to plan...

0 · 182 views · located in Earth

a character in “HMSTCK”, as played by Daxion


Fastus wears a plain white shirt and fancy green pants with matching shoes. On occasion, he dons a green dress jacket with a white tie (regular tie, not bow tie). He has a pair of glasses which can switch between different regular glasses and different colored shades depending on Fastus’s mood. He also has long jagged scars on both his hands, which each curve down their respective arm.


Sly, calculating and dangerous. He sees people not as people but as tools to accomplish what he desires. Fastus subscribes to the beliefs of his own church, the Church of Scratch and religion, Scratchism, where the messiah is both the saviour and the destroyer. He is a religious fanatic, believing that the righteous become the host for his god while the blasphemers are purged from existence. He acts friendly, helping others when they need help to the point of self sacrifice. However, he always finds a way to get some sort of payment for his help and is often able to convince others to simply give him what he wants.


Fetch Modus: Timed Teleportation. When Fastus places an object into his modus he must set a time and a location. The item is not accessable to be removed but will appear when and where it is set to.
Strife Specibus: Instrument-kind. Fastus wields these musical items and uses them to play a requiem for his opponents. The instruments are able to cast quite a number of "spells" that can decimate anyone foolish enough to stand against their wielder.
Eventual Title: Seer of Hope


A bright young man, Fastus was orphaned for the first 6 years of his life when his parents died in bank robbery. It wasn’t a very good orphanage. Surrounded by bullies and fiends, he developed a hatred for most of the world. When he was finally adopted by his genetic sister, Fastus hones this anger and developed his "religion", the Church of the Scratch. He dedicated himself to the extremes of Scratchism and began to manipulate people to move toward his ultimate goal...

So begins...

Fastus Captio's Story


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Character Portrait: Callus Velares Character Portrait: Fastus Captio
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#, as written by Daxion
Midnight. 12:00. The witching hour. The suburbs. The Captio household, dark save for the light of the computer screen in Fastus’s room. Fastus himself was not at his computer. He was sitting on his bed, in
the dark, planning, scheming. His computer was computing, installing the game, Sburb, that he had placed into it. Huh? You thought he wouldn’t have Sburb at this point in time? Why would you think that? Fastus pulled quite a few strings to get his hands on 4 copies of both the server and client disks and spent a huge portion of his personal time finding three “friends” to play the game with. Fastus bantered with them for months, dropping hints and tips to eventually lead them to the inevitable mention of Sburb. He would be damned if he wasn’t prepared. The players had been set: the warrior, the mage, the jack and, of course, the schemer. The overture has reached its final notes. It was time...

valdephonousHost [VH] began pestering rocketingHeir [RH]
VH: Hello again.
VH: Are you ready?
VH: You have the disk, correct?
VH: Goodness, where are my manners?
VH: I must apologize for my over excitement.
VH: I’m just full of anticipation for the grand adventure that is sure to await us!
VH: I’m talking to a wall aren’t I?


Characters Present

Character Portrait: Callus Velares Character Portrait: Fastus Captio
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He was messaged by VH this time, but he wasn't expecting to be pestered without reaching the top of the mountain. He lost his grip on the mountain he was climbing and fell down the side of the mountain, this would prove a challenge when entering the Medium later on. For now though it would only hurt a lot, but he was warned of those mountains. While he tumbled down he heard the voice of his dead father saying." I warned you about those mountains son, I warned you." His father did warn him about mountain climbing and stairs, but he occasionally forgot the advice given to him. He remembered that he was falling, so he tried to use a shirt as a parachute. But he didn't put on a shirt, so he was pretty much doomed as he saw it. Before he fell to his death he remembered that there was a pile of leaves at the bottom, from the time his dad decided to jump off the mountain and into the leaves. This pile of leaves was the place that Callus's father died, but Callus's mind chose to put that memory deep inside his subconscious. Luckily for Callus his subconscious was able to save him before he died, his subconscious made him notice the fact that a parachute was stuck to one of the trees he was about fall past. This was the parachute his father used the day he died, but Callus just thought it was one of many parachutes scattered around the island due to his friends dropping presents with parachutes attached. The parachute slowed him down, but it broke the instant he fell onto it. The leaves broke his fall, considering the parachute was there to save his life. He saw a box near one of the trees, he never noticed this box before due to him having no reason to be here before. He cleared the plants and other things off of it, so he could look at the box better. He really wanted to look at what was inside the box, but he had to get home due to it almost being night and creatures that could kill him coming out at night.

He ran to his home, completely ignoring the fact he almost died. He jumped through his door and quickly closed it, since it was steel none of the creatures could break it down without being intelligent. He remembered he was messaged earlier and decided to leave the box on his couch, he then tried to get the pda he dropped earlier without knowing he dropped it. It wasn't there, he quickly connected the dots and noticed he dropped it earlier when falling out of the mountain. He went downstairs leaving the box on the couch, his laptop was in his giant basement and it was a bit hard to see without the lights turned on. He moved his hand along the wall looking for the light switch, he found it and turned it on so he could see and there was his laptop that projected a holographic image of a screen and keyboard. The laptop itself was only a ring the size of an orange, it had a hole in the middle that was filled with circuitry and a projector for the holograms. He connected a wireless mouse to the ring and began opening Pesterchum, he saw that the person who messaged him was VH himself. Their conversation went like this
valdephonousHost [VH] began pestering rocketingHeir [RH]
VH: Hello again.
VH: Are you ready?
VH: You have the disk, correct?
VH: Goodness, where are my manners?
VH: I must apologize for my over excitement.
VH: I’m just full of anticipation for the grand adventure that is sure to await us!
VH: I’m talking to a wall aren’t I?

RH: My bad, I fell off the mountain I was scaling when you messaged me, one second, I have to see what this package I found is for.

Callus checked out what the package had inside of it, he was surprised to find a yellow envelope with a disk labeled Sburb inside of it.

RH: It wouldn't happen to be named Sburb, would it?
RH: If it is, it came with the package.

Callus didn't notice that there was a note under the envelope, but if he did then he would probably be in a state of confusion and he wouldn't be able to have the rest of this conversation with VH.

VH: That is indeed the aformentioned disk. Tell me, was it my message that caused you to loose balance?
RH: Yeah, that kind of hurt when I fell down the mountain.
RH: It's cool though. If that didn't happen, I wouldn't have found the package.

The setting changes from Homestuck to Earth


Characters Present

Character Portrait: Callus Velares Character Portrait: Fastus Captio Character Portrait: Keni Howard Character Portrait: Elix Straumm
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#, as written by Daxion
valdephonousHost [VH] invited rocketingHeir [RH], dashingFalcon [DF] and smilingUrsurper [SU] to post in memo.
VH: Greetings everyone. I assume that you have all received a copy of Sburb?
VH: Let me rephrase. Whether or not you have the disk “now” is not important.
VH: You all WILL receive the game. This is clear. I shall thus continue accordingly.
VH: Now then,
VH: What you must first do is obtain a “server” player.
VH: My “client” player is, as of now, rocketingHeir.
VH: This means that I am his server player.
VH: Having a server player is essential to completing the game.
VH: If you ARE a server player, you must place or “deploy” certain objects so that your client player can progress. This is done using a type of currency known as “grist”.
VH: The object are, in no particular order:
VH: Cruxtruder, Totem Lathe, Punch Designix and Alchemiter.
VH: As well, you must deploy a special “Pre-punched card”.
VH: These objects must be operated in order. I shall explain.
VH: Upon opening your Cruxtruder, a Kernelsprite is released. This sprite can combine with, or prototype itself with, any object it touches, up to 3 total. This changes the sprite’s appearance and capabilities. Be warned, it has a particular affinity to go after those who are, or will soon be, deceased.
VH: Once the sprite is released, Cruxite Dowels can then be extracted from the Cruxtruder.
VH: Using punched cards (acquired by entering captchalogue cards into the Punch Designix) and a Dowel on the Totem Lathe will shape the Dowel in a...unique pattern.
VH: This Dowel can then be entered into the Alchemiter and create the object on the card that was originally placed into the Lathe, assuming you have enough grist to pay.
VH: If you overlap cards when placing them into the Totem Lathe, it will combine the objects on the cards.
VH: When using the pre-punched card in this entire process, it eventually creates a “Cruxite Artifact” which will assist in transporting you to the next stage of the game and away from the Reckoning.
VH: Oh, that reminds me. I almost forgot to mention something rather important.
VH: When you open the Cruxtruder, it sets off a sort of timer. When this countdown reaches 0...
VH: Well, lets just say it’s not pleasant.
VH: This “Reckoning” is not an obstacle you can fight, just one you can run away from.
VH: That about wraps up the explanation of the game so far.
VH: Ta ta for now.
valdephonousHost [VH]
ceased responding to memo.

The instructions had been laid out, clear as day. There was very little chance that anyone could mess this up. If they did...Fastus shuddered to think of the enormous amount of time he would have to spend gathering another party and get another set of disks. No, these would have to do.


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Character Portrait: Callus Velares Character Portrait: Fastus Captio
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valdephonousHost [VH] invited rocketingHeir [RH], dashingFalcon [DF] and smilingUrsurper [SU] to post in memo.
VH: Greetings everyone. I assume that you have all received a copy of Sburb?
VH: Let me rephrase. Whether or not you have the disk “now” is not important.
VH: You all WILL receive the game. This is clear. I shall thus continue accordingly.
VH: Now then,
VH: What you must first do is obtain a “server” player.
VH: My “client” player is, as of now, rocketingHeir.
VH: This means that I am his server player.
VH: Having a server player is essential to completing the game.
VH: If you ARE a server player, you must place or “deploy” certain objects so that your client player can progress. This is done using a type of currency known as “grist”.
VH: The objects are, in no particular order:
VH: Cruxtruder, Totem Lathe, Punch Designix and Alchemiter.
VH: As well, you must deploy a special “Pre-punched card”.

dashingFalcon[DF] has responded to the memo

DF: Oh god, so this isn't a hook up after training session game?
DF: this is such a FALCON SURPRISE
DF: Oh wait, maybe I FALCON CAN
DF: but this whole sprite thing is pretty cool.
DF: Justifies me owning one polar bear rug.
DF: get ready for BEARSPRITE!!!
DF: Oh and I call smilingUrsurper for a server player. FALCON DIBBS
DF: p.s. team name shall be team SMILINGROCKETFALCONHOST
DF: P.s.s #swag #yolo #FALCON

rocketingHeir[RH] has responded to the memo

RH: We will be the best team out there, no other team will be able to even come close to our awesomeness. 
RH: I think it would be best to throw in something for communication and something to allow for consumption of food or we may die of hunger.
RH: Imagine being able to have free chips from a sprite all the time, this is going to be great. 
RH: I'm throwing in one of my spare fridges in my basement, a dictionary, and I don't think I have a third thing to put in.
RH: This combination should allow communication between me and the Sprite, and it should allow me to never go hungry or die of dehydration.
RH: If I'm reading this right, then I should be able to combine weapons with the totem lathe and make an awesome godly weapon.
RH: I'm going to need to get some 'grist' before I make anything though.
RH: I second DF's choice of name. 
RH: I have a bit of questions before I play the game.
RH: How powerful are the enemies in the game?
RH: Oh and DF, wanna see how many monsters we can kill as a team? 
[DF] Yo RH, you can alchemize food to creat more, just make sure it's easily non-perishable. Junkfood and canned goods have kept me going so far, not quite sure on the sandwiches though.
[DF] i can readily accept your slaying prowess as FALCON TEAMWORK
RH:High five. Anyone wouldn't happen to have any knifes or anything to throw?  I'm kind of useless without a projectile to throw.

The setting changes from Earth to Homestuck


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Character Portrait: Fastus Captio
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#, as written by Daxion
valdephonousHost [VH] began responding to memo.
[VH]: Your team name suggestion has been recognized, acknowledged and accepted.
[VH]: As for RH's question, you cannot communicate with your sprite unless you prototype it with something that is or once was alive. A Dictionarysprite would likely just spout off random words.
[VH]: Now, about the strength of the enemies. As with all games, the strengths vary. At the beginning of the game, once you craft your Cruxite Artifact and interact with it, it will transport you into a realm known as The Medium, to a unique "Land" that caters to your personality and tastes. This is where the game truly begins.
[VH]: Enemies will begin to spawn here, imps at first. They will have abilities and traits based on what you prototyped with your sprite. Each time you prototype, all the enemies will alter accordingly. When in the Medium, you must advance through "Gates", 8 in total, to reach the third step of the game. I'll talk about that when I come to it.
[VH]: The enemies and obstacles will become more challenging as you progress, making it all the more satisfying when you defeat them.
[VH]: Just to give you a little preview of what you are in for, the second most powerful obstacles in the game are known as the Denizens. Each player must eventually defeat their corresponding Denizen to defeat the end boss and win the game. The aforementioned boss is known as the Black King. He gains powers from all players' different prototypings, making him a near demigod.
[VH]: Moving on, I believe that I should tell you all about the different player titles. Each player has a "player title" that describes them, consisting of a class and an aspect: like "Page of Life" or "Thief of Breath".
[VH]: Your class defines what type of abilities you receive, when you receive them and your primary role in the game while your aspect defines your powers and your secondary role in the game. Classes can be either supporting or solitary and sometimes has an associated gender. Aspects usually have both a physical or literal meaning and an associative or secondary meaning Here’s a quick rundown of all of them, at least the ones I know of.

Rogue; Steals “aspect” and gives to others, supporting, often female.
Thief; Steals “aspect” and supplies self, solitary, often female.
Heir; Becomes the manifestation of “aspect” and/or is protected by “aspect” depending on playstyle, either solitary or supporting, steadily gains strength through the passing of time, always male.
Maid; Defends with “aspect” or supplies self with “aspect”, solitary, always female.
Page; Provides others with “aspect”, supporting, starts weak but becomes very strong later in the game, abilities can vary based on circumstance, always male.
Knight; Uses “aspect” as a weapon to protect and assist others, both solitary and supporting, starts quite strong but gains little strength over the course of the game, either male or female.
Seer; Has extensive knowledge of “aspect” which they use to assist others, supporting, always has knowledge pertaining to or about Sburb, either male or female.
Mage; Has deep knowledge and experience of “aspect” as well as a slight immunity to it, supporting but can possible be solidary, either male or female.
Sylph; Heals using “aspect” or shares “aspect” with others, supporting, always female.
Witch; Manipulates or breaks the rules of “aspect”, solitary with supportive tendencies, always female.
Bard; Allows for destruction of or with “aspect” or sets stage for destruction of or with “aspect”, supporting (although they often make it harder for the party), always male.
Prince; Destroy “aspect” or destroys with “aspect”, solitary, always male.
Scribe; Observes and documents “aspect”, supporting, gains very few abilities, may eventually find loopholes or glitches in their aspect or the game itself, either female or male.
Lord; Master class, ultimate solitary, always male.
Muse; Master class, ultimate supporting, always female.

Time; Time or the passing of time, has the ability to activate a mechanism known as “The Scratch” which resets the entire game with slightly different circumstances.
Space; Physics or paradox space (alternate universes and such), has the task of breeding together frogs to create the Genesis Frog (a universe of sorts).
Void; Nothingness or lack of knowledge.
Light; Light or luck or knowledge.
Mind; Thoughts or decisions.
Heart; Soul or love.
Doom; Death and destruction or sacrifice or judgement.
Life; Survival or structure or restoration.
Rage; Anger or suffering or belief (blind).
Hope; Hope or sanctity or belief (hopeful, like imagination).
Blood; Unity or emotions.
Breath; Wind or direction.

[VH]: I have deciphered that I am most likely a Seer (due to my extensive knowledge of the game), though of what aspect I am unsure, possibly Mind. As a Seer, my job is to guide the rest of you through the game, as I am doing right now. If any of you come up with what your potential class or aspect might be, let me know so that I can plan accordingly.
[VH]: Now then, if you will excuse me, I’ll see you all in the Medium.
valdephonousHost [VH]
ceased responding to memo.


Characters Present

Character Portrait: Callus Velares Character Portrait: Fastus Captio
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[RH]: This is a lot to take in at at time, but I guess that you wont go easy on me with information.
[RH]: A bard of time or space would be terrible, so I hope we don't have any in our session.
[RH]: Space, now that sounds like an awesome aspect.
[RH]: I could throw knifes at supersonic speeds and stuff like that.
[RH]: If I could take a wild guess, then I guess I'm an heir.
[RH]: I think I'm prototyping my dad, since it would be awesome to have him as a sprite.
[RH]: I just hope the imps don't take on the appearance of my father when I prototype him, since it'll be pretty weird killing the imps.
[RH]: Let's say I wanted to visit your land, would I be able to?

rocketingHeir[RH] has ceased responding to the memo.

Callus began a private conversation with VH, since VH might know what's wrong with the dreams Callus has been having lately. When he opened the chat his mind was trying to figure out what to mention first.

rocketingHeir[RH] has began pestering valdephonousHost[VH]

[RH]: Yo, I keep on having the god damn dreams, it's driving me crazy.
[RH]: The dreams made me want to break every clock that I owned, since the infernal ticking is always in my dream's background.
[RH]: I keep on seeing the purple-blooded monster in my dreams.
[RH]: The thing, it has giant horns and it has a wild smile on it's face.
[RH]: It's carrying juggling clubs and it appears to be a clown, but this clown isn't even remotely funny.
[RH]: Is this somehow connected to the game or am I just subconsciously afraid of demon clowns?

has ceased pestering valdephonousHost[VH]

The setting changes from Homestuck to Earth


Characters Present

Character Portrait: Callus Velares Character Portrait: Omega Character Portrait: Fastus Captio
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#, as written by Daxion
Fastus walked through the undergrowth of his player planet, The Land of Illusion and Nightshade, his Poolsprite following close behind. His sprite had been prototyped first with a pool cue, not a swimming pool, and Fastus was currently looking for something living or dead for its second prototyping. As he did so, Fastus reflected on the past. He had recently turned ten, and had just received a computer for his birthday from his sister. This was actually a pleasant surprise that his sibling had used the money given to her by the government for raising Fastus on something other than drugs or booze. With as much ambivalence as one can muster while setting up a brand new gadget, Fastus installed his computer and created a Pesterchum account. Almost immediately, he began being contacted. Of course, Fastus hadn't added anyone yet, so this came as a bit of a surprise.

fragmentaryLast [FL] began trolling harmoniousOctave [HO]
[FL]: he
[FL]: hehehehehehe
[FL]: HEllo.

[HO] Greetings.
[FL]: hehehehehehehehehehe
[FL]: he

[HO]: What is so humorous?
[FL]: humorous?
[FL]: oh, NO. you misunderstand. i’m NOt LAUGHing.

[HO]: Then what are you doing?
[FL]: im talking about HIM.
[FL]: HIM.
[FL]: HIS.
[FL]: HE.
[FL]: he
[FL]: hehehehehehehehe

[HO]: How are you contacting me right now?
[FL]: luck. i sent out a signal at random and you answered.
[FL]: ring ring.
[FL]: ring ring.

[HO]: Who’s there?
[FL]: ME.
[FL]: hehehehehehehehehehe

[HO]: Who are you? Why are you talking to me?
[FL]: who am i? telling you my name would accomplish NOthing. even if you knew who i was before. ive changed since tHEn.
[HO]: Since when?
[FL]: a long TIME ago. sWEEPs and sWEEPs. NOw, my name is gone, USELESS.
[FL]: i suppose you can call ME.
[FL]: or OMEGA for short.

[OH]: Alright “Omega”. Who’s this “he” you speak of?
[FL]: oh. HIM? HE is NOthing short of a GOD.
[FL]: HIS POWERs are beyond compreHEnsion.
[FL]: HE travels around tHE universe. bringing hope to the WEAK and DESPAIR to the strong.
[FL]: HE shall PURGE the worlds in neverENDing FIRE.
[FL]: and from tHE aSHEs will aRISE a new dawn. a fresh start. a wonderful world of peace and prosperity.
[FL]: hehehehehehehehehehehehe

[OH]: That...sounds wonderful.
[FL]: it will be.
[FL]: HE couldnt accomplish it without tHE MESSIEVILs assistance. of course.

[OH]: The who?
[FL]: tHE MESSIEVIL. hes a fancy FELLow. always dresses in a green and white suit with a tie.
[OH]: What does this Messievil have to do with...erm...”Him”.
[FL]: tHE MESSIEVIL is HIS HOST. tHE MESSIEVIL paved the way for HIM. he set tHE stage and DIMmed the lights.
[FL]: and in tHE END. tHE MESSIEVIL will PERISH.
[FL]: and like a CATerpillar sHEds its husk and becomes a butterfly.
[FL]: from tHE MESSIEVILs remains. HE shall arise.

[OH]: Wow. That’s quite the story.
[FL]: story? oh NO. the whole thing is true.
[OH]: You’re kidding.
[OH]: How do you know my name?
[FL]: hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe
[OH]: How do you know my name?!
[FL]: i recognized your typing style. weve spoke in my past. your future.
[OH]: How is that possible?
[FL]: time SHEnanigans.
[FL]: you WANT to kNOw something cool?

[OH]: What is it?
[FL]: you are tHE MESSIEVIL. or can be.
[OH]: What?
[FL]: you are tHE perfect candidate for becoming HIS HOST. a MESSIEVIL needs to be smart. clever. tricky. and willing to gain power at whatever cost.
[OH]: So what if I am?
[FL]: tHEn you will become powerful. and you will change tHE world. your dreams of a universe of your own shall be realized. all of existence shall recognize you. and obey. you shall become HIM. and all that that entails.
[FL]: hehehehehehehehehehe

[OH]: So, you’ve talked to myself in the future?
[FL]: yes.
[OH]: And I will become strong?
[FL]: tHE STRONGest.
[OH]: What do I need to do?
[FL]: be smart. be clever. be tricky. seek out power and SEIZE it. find those who you can FOOL into HELPing you and use tHEm to do tHE dirty work. create and destroy.
[OH]: Alright. I’ll do it. Will you help me?
[FL]: ive done eNOugh already. you can handle it from here.
[FL]: youd better get started. tick tock fastus.
[FL]: HE
[FL]: HE
[FL]: he

[HO]: Goodbye Omega. I look forward to hearing from you again.
[FL]: NOt likely. im a very busy PURPLE BLOOD. ive got places to go and people to KILL.
[FL]: later motHERFUCKER.
fragmentaryLast [FL]
ceased trolling harmoniousOctave [HO]

Speaking of Pesterchum, back in the present, Fastus was being contacted by another one of his “friends.” Thankfully, he had planned for this. Just as expected, Fastus’s computer materialized in front of him out of his Captchalogue. He opened it and read the message from RH. He finished the text, paused with surprise and re-read it. With great haste, Fastus typed a response.

valdephonousHost[VH] began pestering rocketingHeir[RH]
[VH]: I hate to tell you this, but I don’t think it’s just your subconscious. I’ve talked a “purple blood” before, or at least he claimed that he was.
[VH]: His name is the Omega. I’m not entirely sure “what” he is, just that he might be helpful, dangerous or both. He’s the one that first pointed me in the direction of Sburb.
[VH]: His screen name is “fragmentaryLast” and he uses some weird form of pestering called “trolling.” If he talks to you, be wary. He is, without a shadow of a doubt, completely insane.
[VH]: The first and last time we spoke, he was babbling on about “HIM” and a “Messievil”. He also told me “tick tock”, but that may be just a coincidence. Nevertheless, keep an eye out for him. He might have crucial information regarding this game that even I do not have access to.
[VH]: Oh, and don’t tell the others about him. If this Omega is really as dangerous as he sounds, we don’t want anyone else pursuing him. dashingFalcon especially might try and track him down or something foolish like that. The last thing that this party needs is the loss of one of our members.
[VH]: I’m trusting you with this. If you run into him or he contacts you, be sure to tell me immediately. I’m absolutely certain that you can handle it. Don’t let me down. Ciao.
valdephonousHost [VH]
ceased pestering rocketingHeir [RH]


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Character Portrait: Callus Velares Character Portrait: Fastus Captio
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rocketingHeir[RH] began pestering valdephonousHost[VH]

[RH]: Interesting, although I'm not going to be foolish enough to be swayed by him if that is his goal.
[RH]: I'm not stupid enough to pick a fight I can't win, since I have no idea what his abilities are it would be stupid for me to jump in headfirst.
[RH]: I'll be sure to not tell DS about him, since I don't want him to die fighting a monster that could possibly be swayed to help us.
[RH]: I wonder if we can manipulate him and get him to tell us things that we do not know.
[RH]: In all honesty though, I probably wont be able to function when around him due to him being the cause of many nightmares I have.
[RH]: If he knows as much as we think he does, then he should be able to use this to his advantage.
[RH]: Is he hoping to kill us? If he is then we should probably setup a base, as to not be separated and die easily.
[RH]: Shall you set up my objects? I really am interested in playing this game and perhaps seeing what I can learn.
[RH]: I really want to be an Heir Of Space, since I like rockets and I'm an heir to a lot of things.
[RH]: Wouldn't it be awesome if that was my role?

rocketingHeir[RH] ceased pestering valdephonousHost[VH]

Callus was seriously interested in what this 'monster' wanted from him and his friends, so he would try and get the information out of the psychotic person who pestered VH. He licked his lips and prepared for the most fun he had in his life, since this would be quite an interesting adventure. He cracked his knuckles and expected to be bothered by the 'person' who talked to VH, but he hoped he wasn't just a pawn in a game. He had a couple of throwing knifes, an unloaded rifle, some forks, and a laptop were captchalouged. He went downstairs into his storage and looked for a fridge, so he could get food without wasting grist on food. He couldn't find any fridges, so he went through the Transportalizer and found a fridge in the room it led to. He brought the fridge back with him and put it next to his main computer, the one he was to install sBurb on. He went past the corpse of his father, but he would never be convinced that his father was dead. He accidentally knocked the corpse of his father into a fire, so he tried grabbing the corpse out of the fire and into a bowl of water. He forgot to put water in the bowl and his father's corpse burned into ashes. He finally accepted that his father was dead, since he couldn't deny that his father was just burned into ashes. He wasn't sad, since he could bring back his father and adventure with his father. However, he wouldn't prototype his father into the sprite until after he entered the medium and this would save him the trouble of fighting imps that looked like father. He put the ashes in an urn, so he wouldn't lose track of the ashes. He grabbed his father's favorite gun and brought it with him to his main computer, since it would be best to put his father's favorite gun in the sprite as well. He was prepared to enter the medium, but he needed VH to setup his machines and then he would be ready to begin the adventure.


Characters Present

Character Portrait: Callus Velares Character Portrait: Fastus Captio
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#, as written by Daxion
valdephonousHost[VH] began pestering rocketingHeir[RH]
[VH]: I'm not entirely sure what he wants. Kill us or help us, I can't tell for certain.
[VH]: By the way, I really like your home. Have you got a place in mind for me to deploy what you need?

The setting changes from Earth to Homestuck


Characters Present

Character Portrait: Fastus Captio Character Portrait: Keni Howard
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#, as written by Daxion
LOIAN certainly earned its namesake, especially the illusions part. While waiting for a response from Callus, Fastus had traversed his player planet, looking for his gateways. Though only a few imps were present, the world was still quite difficult and full of obstacles. When Fastus walked through what he thought to be the first gate, he soon found that it was actually a sheet of glass with a picture of the first gate drawn on it. He searched every section of LOIAN that he could, finding chests of grist and boondollars instead of any sign of the real gateway. This was proving to be most tiring. It suddenly occurred to Fastus that if he reached the second gate before any of the other players reached the Medium, he would be unable to advance further. He groaned at his stupidity. Exploiting a bug in the game to get this far ahead as quickly as possible had its downside. His computer was still out thankfully, since Fatus had no idea when RH would get back to him. After a quick calculation of who he should choose for his server player, Fastus opened the laptop and contacted one of the members of his group.

valdephonousHost [VH] began pestering smilingUsuper [SU]

[VH]: Greetings Miss Howard.
[VH]: I hate to bother you at the moment, but I am currently in a...predicament.
[VH]: Your assistance is required for me to progress any further in the game.

[SU] Good morning, Host.
[SU] I will try to help in any way that I can.
[SU] You've got impeccable manners, btw

[VH] Thank you. Well then, is it possible that you could connect to my session as my Server Player?
[VH]: Although I have found a backdoor into the Medium, and entered it that way, I have no way of advancing without...erm...
[VH]: Without your help.

Fuck, he hated to admit that. Rule number one, the thing he had remember all these years of having to fend for himself in a cruel world, was to never show weakness. Fastus had learned that the hard way, from the fists of the bullies in his orphanage. Never show weakness, ever. Not to your enemies, not to your supposed friends, not even to yourself. Anybody could betray you, no matter who they are. The rules of the jungle are that the weak die out while the strong survive. That was true here as well, and everywhere. Display even a slight break, a tiny crack in yourself, and they will rip you apart.

[SU] I wouldn't mind that at all. *smiles*
[SU] Though, I am rather new to the game so...
[SU] Please don't get upset if I do something wrong. *nervous smile*
[SU] But I will do the best I can. Shall we?

Fastus did his best to not become attached to this kind young lady. He continually reminded himself of what he had planned for the lot of them once this game had reached its final moments. As much as he hated to think about it, it would be even harder still to get himself to do it. Betrayal was not an easy thing to stomach, even if you are the one organizing it. Well, especially if you are the one organizing it.

[VH]: Yes. We shall.
[VH]: And Keni?
[VH]: Thank you.

[SU] You're more than welcome.
[SU] *smiles and pulls on gloves* Let's do this thing!

His computer connected to Keni’s, the only slightly needed server player’s presence activating both of LOIAN’s gateways.

The setting changes from Homestuck to Alternia


Characters Present

Character Portrait: Callus Velares Character Portrait: Danavel Maujī Character Portrait: Zuriik Taroql Character Portrait: Fastus Captio Character Portrait: Keni Howard Character Portrait: Elix Straumm
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#, as written by Daxion
Zuriik awoke, quite suddenly. There was no slow sequence, just a quick return to consciousness. Just the feeling of being submerged. Zuriik opened his eyes to an expanse of dark looking green. “Sopor. But it’s been diluted or something. It’s like, weaker now.” he thought to himself. He reached his hands out of the slimy concoction and pulled himself above the surface. With a deep breath of fresh air, he lurched forward, falling out of the Recuperacoon with a wet splotch, waking up a slumbering Freddy in the corner. “What the fuck!? Oh, Zuriik. You’re awake. Wait. You’re...awake? Holy shit, you’re awake. Huzzah!”

“Save the applause Fred, I’m a little wiped out at the moment.” Zuriik rolled onto his back, wheezing with exhaustion at the minor effort of movement after a long time if being stationary. "Fuck. How long was I out?"

"Like three days man, give or take."

"That long, huh?"

"What happened to you? You kinda died there for a minute."

"Yeah, about that..." Zuriik began to explain the tale of what he had experienced while unconscious, with the exception of his crazy dreams. As he did so, he steadily moved more and more until he could stand on his own. He went through a rudimentary yoga routine to wake up his muscles more, Freddy just standing by and listening to his story. " that's really it."


"Hey Freddy?"

"Yeah, what's up?"

"Where are my clothes?"

It was as if he noticed for the first time that Zuriik was covered in slime and wearing only his underwear. He blushed, his cheeks coloring in with teal. "Oh. Uh. Right. Sorry. They're over here, let me go get them." He left the room as fast as his legs could carry him.

Zuriik was alone in the makeshift bedroom, at least for now. It wasn't very nice by many standards, but for him it was. Besides the Recuperacoon, it had a table and chest. Freddy entered the room then, laying a pile of clothes and a towel down on the table and scurrying away again. Zuriik wiped himself off and dressed, exiting the room into the hallway, which lead into the transportalizer hub. Freddy stood right, nervously twiddling his thumbs. “Hey, Fred. I’ve got a quick question or two. Cool?”

“Yeah, sure man.”

“The crabby troll. What’s his name?”

“That’s Karkat.”

“Blind chick?”


“Dude with the metal legs?”


“Polite and proper girl with a chainsaw?”


“Drugged up clown?”


“The one whose name I don’t know.”

“Ah, then Gamzee.”

“Strong one who is also a mechanic?”


“Glub girl and duality psychic.”

“Feferi and Sollux.”


“Probably Eridan.”


“Definitely Vriska. So I guess that leaves-”


“-Nepeta. do you already know her name?”

“Don’t you remember? I told you, I met her on Derse before we entered The Medium.”

After a moment or two of thinking, realization covered Freddy’s face as he put two and two together. “She’s the cat-troll!”

“What? Of course she is. How have you just now figured this out?”

“Well, I was a little too busy making sure you didn’t kill yourself in your sleep or anything.”

“And yet you managed to recall all their names.”

“I’ve got a really good memory for names.” Freddy punched Zuriik’s shoulder. “Dude, you’re on the same asteroid as the girl of your dreams! Kinda literally your dreams to.”

“Yes, I know. Just...don’t tell anyone about the whole...fact that I’m super flushed for her, okay?”

“My lips are sealed.”

“You didn’t already tell anyone about that, did you?”

“Nah bro, I just told them about The Pain and the visions, at least as much as you told me. I didn’t think you’d want me to tell anyone about your long distance flush-crush or anything.”

“Thanks man.”

“Anytime. So what now?”

“I’m going to go introduce myself again, I suppose. Then just play it by ear.”

“Oh, by the way, Karkat wanted to talk to you about something when you woke up. Well...he said if...but you get the idea. You sure you’re okay to be up and walking?”

“I’ll be fine. Later Freddy.”

“Later Zuriik.”

The two of them parted ways, Freddy heading back to who knows where while his friend stepped into the computer room through a transportalizer. Most of the trolls were present, either typing on chat windows or just sitting around. Nepeta wasn’t there for whatever reason, neither was Freddy of course. Equius was also absent, though everyone else who could be accounted for was. Gale and Danavel seemed to have integrated themselves rather well, they looked like a part of the one big happy family that were currently living their lives on an asteroid in the middle of nowhere. One big happy fucking lie. The crabmeister himself was seated in front of a computer, deep in typed conversation. No one really noticed Zuriik when entered, nor when he walked behind Karkat. From his vantage point over the cancer’s shoulder, Zuriik could see who Karkat was talking to. Whoever the guy was, he looked pretty alien. Weird colored skin, no horns, typing in sky blue of all colors.
“So these are the humans I’ve heard about, huh?”

Karkat jumped a foot in the air, whirling around to face Zuriik. “Fuck! Don’t sneak up on me like that.” His face was slightly flushed with red and he looked as if he had just been caught with his pants down.

“Whatcha doin there Karkat? Having some kind of crossdimensional interspecies hate-date?”

“No! It’s purely platonic. Wait. You’re one of the new guys, aren’t you?”

“Zuriik is the name you are looking for.”

“Right. Didn’t you die or something?”

Zuriik shrugged. “I got better.”

“And how do you know my name?”

He tapped his temple, sitting down in a nearby chair as he did so. “Visions, remember? I used to see the future.”

“Used to?”

“Yeah. Turns out the whole thing was some crazy scheme by a dick future version of myself. I told him to knock it off.”

Karkat rolled his eyes. “Sort of preaching to the choir about the assholish future self.”

“Oh,” Zuriik replied sarcastically, “so your future self ruined your life by mutating you into a freak and giving you daily doses of extreme suffering? And I thought I was the only one.”

" I'm sure you had a tough fucking life, you don't have to be a dick about it."

Refusing to respond, Zuriik instead scanned the room, looking at the various trolls who were doing - in his view - fuck all. "So why contact the humans anyway? What's up with that?"

"We're trying them...sort of."

"Why? What's so important about them?"

"You know how you get a universe if you win Sgrub?"

"Not until now. Never really got that far in the game."

"The humans are our universe's inhabitants. shut out of our prize by this guy, Jack Noir. And now we're stuck on this stupid asteroid."

"Right." The transportalizer flared into life behind Zuriik as a troll left the room (probably Tavros by the clanking sound he made). "So why did you want to see me anyway?"

"Just wanted to tell you to stay out of trouble. And don't fuck around with the humans. This is a very delacate process, any wrong word could potentially screw up the entire thing."

"Got it, later Karkat." Zuriik turned and left the red-blooded troll. Since there was a computer open, he decided to completely ignore Karkats orders and talk to some humans anyway. He sat down and pulled out his computer goggles to copy over his Trollian account. As he was rummaging around his inventory, attempting to balance out the scales, Zuriik noticed that Clockwork was doing some weird stuff in his strife specibus. He pulled out the red scythe after his goggles, examining Clockwork. The blade was now marked with some sort of digital display, steadily counting down. "The fuck is this?" he asked of no one in particular.

“Clockwork is out of charge.” echoed a voice out of nowhere. Zuriik leapt a foot in the air and looked around, attempting to locate the source of the sound. “This is The Ensightened. I am speaking to you in your mind. As I was saying, your scythe has run out of power. The ability you used to travel through paradox space is incredibly powerful and Clockwork needs some time...and some Time to repair itself.”

“I thought I told you never to talk to me again.” Zuriik mumbled under his breath.

“You need some guidance at the moment. Don’t worry, I’m not going to tell you what path you should take in the future, I place that responsibility in your hands now. And all that that responsibility entails. I just decided to step in and give you a little tip about Clockwork, seeing as how I have mastered the weapon much more than you have. You see the little switch there by the base? Flick it.”

“What the fuck are you talking about...oh. I didn’t know that was there.” He did as he was told and a small cord popped out of the blunt end of the scythe. “Plug that into your computer.” Zuriik followed directions and pushed the male bit of the cord into the female port in the computer. Every computer in the entire room shut off, going dark for a moment. After a couple of seconds, they turned on again, amidst a multitude of “what the fuck?”s and the single “what the glub?” Thankfully, nothing seemed to be lost, so no troll was the wiser. Except for Zuriik. His chat window had quite strangely been taken over by a list of twenty-digit number and letter combinations, some in different colors as well. “This is a directory of different contactable human sessions, all playing their equivalent of Sgrub. The red ones signify off limits sessions and that one green one there is the session that your new...friends are contacting.”

“So what about the blue one?”

“I’m not really sure about the blue session. It’s somewhat important in the grand scheme of things, but my vision is blurred in that section of space and time. I’d suggest not messing with that one”

Zuriik grinned at this. “As much as I would love to disobey Karkat’s orders, I think that that ignoring your advice is a hundred times more fun.” He moved his cursor over to the blue session’s code and clicked once. After a short loading screen, his chat window now showed four unfamiliar screen names. “valdephonousHost, rocketingHeir, dashingFalcon and smilingUrsurper. So these are some humans huh?” There was no response from The Ensightened. Zuriik shugged and prepared to contact one of the humans when four more names were suddenly added to the list.

“Here. I thought you might like it if you could both ignore me and disobey Karkat at the same time.”

“That’s quite considerate of you. Wait, why would you want me to go against Karkat?”

“I’m you, remember? I was just as sick of his authority as you are, or will be. Might as well let you get some good laughs in before the shit hits the whirling device.”

“Alright. So you’ve started seeing things from my point of view, huh?”

“Not really. I still think you’re being a total idiot. But you’ll come around eventually. No reason to rush things.”

“Whatever. Can you stop talking to me now, I’m in the mood to contact some aliens.” Silence on the other end of the mind-o-phone. Awesome. It was time to get to work. Or play, rather.

slayronicJustiscythe [SJ] began trolling ectoBiologist [EB]

[SJ]: m4ats nb, stnbiq 4nwau?
[EB]: um. excuse me?
[EB]: what?

[SJ]: [I said: What’s up, stupid human?]
[EB]: oh. well, i’m doing pretty well. it’s my twelfth birthday and all.
[SJ]: m4at t43 fnck is a pirt4qay?
[EB]: It’s like...a celebration of when you were born.
[EB]: seriously, you don’t know what a birthday is?

[SJ]: m3ll, trolls qou’t r3ally 4ave pist4qays. me 4ave mriggliug qays iust3aq.
[EB]: uh...okay?
[EB]: so you’re another troll, huh?

[SJ]: piugo.
[EB]: are you going to be mean to me too?
[SJ]: m4at? m4y moulq i qo t4at?
[EB]: because every other troll i have talked to has.
[EB]: so not all of you are mean? i thought that was kind of a troll thing.

[SJ]: …
[EB]: what?
[SJ]: [Cutting out the typing quirk for a second, what the actual fuck?]
[SJ]: [Are you really just that much of a stupid racist fuckhead to think that our entire species is a whole congregations of assholes?]
[SJ]: [Alright, granted a good percentage of them are guilty of that. But not all. There are plenty of considerate and kind trolls too.]
[SJ]: [You’d better fucking recognize that before you get on the wrong side of a psychotic highblood.]

[EB]: yeah, i’ll be honest. i understood none of that.
[SJ]: …
[SJ]: m4at’s yonr uaw3 auymay?

[EB]: my uaw3?
[SJ]: [Name. What’s your stupid fucking human name?]
[EB]: john egbert. nice to meet you! :)
[SJ]: 4oly fnck t4at is a stnbiq uaw3.
[EB]: hey! i thought you said you were going to be nice!
[SJ]: i said uot4iug of t43 sort. put...
[SJ]: 43llo John 4nwau. wy uaw3 is Zuriik Taroql.

[EB]: and you called my name wierd?
[SJ]: it’s a watter of b3rsb3ctiv3.
[EB]: alright, whatever. :)
[SJ]: y3a4. (: to yon too.
[EB]: so what do you want anyway?
[SJ]: 7nst maut3q to 43lb yon ont a littl3 pit. mit4 iuforwatiou auq snc4.
[SJ]: so m4at qo yon maut to kuom?

[EB]: out of anything?
[SJ]: ynb.
[EB]: um...
[EB]: what’s the meaning of life?

[SJ]: liv3.
[EB]: just live? that’s kinda...
[EB]: simple.

[SJ]: it’s life, uot a fnckiug riqql3.
[EB]: i thought life was a riddle.
[SJ]: i qou’t t4iuk so. i w3au. i’w uot r3ally oue to talk t4ong4.
[SJ]: i w3au. i’v3 liv3q wy 3utir3 lif3 for lov3. so y3a4.
[SJ]: i gn33s lif3 is w4at yon wak3 of it.

[EB]: aww. that’s really cute. :)
[SJ]: m4at?
[EB]: you’ve lived your life for love? that’s such an adorable thing to say.
[SJ]: …
[SJ]: John 4nwau?

[EB]: yeah?
[SJ]: s4nt t43 fnck nb.
[EB]: oh.
[SJ]: (:
[EB]: oh!
[EB]: well you shut the fuck up too zuriik! :)

[SJ]: rig4t. i’ll l3av3 yon for uom t43u. lat3r John.
[EB]: alright, see you later man.

slayronicJustiscythe [SJ] ceased trolling ectoBiologist [EB]

The setting changes from Alternia to Earth


Characters Present

Character Portrait: Callus Velares Character Portrait: Fastus Captio Character Portrait: Keni Howard Character Portrait: Elix Straumm
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#, as written by Daxion
valdephonousHost [VH] began responding to memo.
[VH]: Attention everyone. It is now time to begin the next stage of the game.
[VH]: And Elix? I do apologize, but I have already procured Miss Howard as my Server Player.
[VH]: Though I do believe she is still in need of a Server Player herself. And Callus is still open for a Client Player. I’m sure you three can work something out.
[VH]: As for the next steps you all must go through...
[VH]: I do believe it is time that we all met in person.
[VH]: That’s right, in person. For the first time.
[VH]: Once everyone has both a Server and Client player, all of us may advance through the gateways and meet up at one of our player planets.
[VH]: Does anyone have any suggestions of whose Land we should all convene at?

rocketingHeir [RH] began responding to memo.
[RH]: We're finally starting.
[RH]: This is going to be awesome.
[RH]: I'm guessing the chain would go like this.
[RH]: SU->VH->RH->DF
[RH]: Probably a land with a little amount of monsters, so we aren't bothered.

[VH]: Yes, that order seems fairly accurate.
[VH]: At least, it will be eventually, once everything is worked out.

dashingFalcon [DF] began responding to the memo.
[DF]: Hey, guys, quick question.
[DF]: Could you help me get out of this FALCON JAM?
[VH]: Depends on your problem. Though I would most likely be willing and ready to assist.
[VH]: Although...Miss Howard is the closest to your land. Perhaps she would be of more help than I would.
[VH]: Well, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
[VH]: First, what is the nature of your issue?

[DF]: oh you know, just the usual FALCON STRIFE
[DF]: It's just that now they keep respawning too fast.
[DF]: i need to get to my kernel sprite to alchemize something, then I should be set.
[DF]: I need time.
[RH]: I'll help, but give me a bit of time to prepare.
[VH]: Hm. Well that seemed to work itself out rather quickly.
[VH]: How very convenient.
[VH]: I suppose it might be even more convenient if we were to all meet up at...
[VH]: Whatever Elix's land is.
[VH]: Wait.
[VH]: Right, Land of Snow and Melody.
[VH]: I..."forgot", for a moment.
[VH]: Heh.
[VH]: Anyways, I do believe that we should all join each other there.
[VH]: Oh, and another thing.
[VH]: I finally figured out my role.
[VH]: It's the Seer of Hope.
[VH]: I was correct in assuming Seer anyways.
[VH]: Has anyone else had any luck with guessing theirs?
[VH] Their roles, that is.

[RH]: I've had a lot of clues pertaining to mine, so I would be pretty stupid to not know what my role is.
[RH]: I'm guessing heir of space.
[RH]: I don't know what that means, but it seem the most possible combination of role and aspect.

[VH]: Good. I certainly hope that you are correct.
[VH]: As long as we have a player of Space in our session, our victory is practically assured.
[VH]: Assured and cemented as fact.
[VH]: Though it would be quite nice to also have a hero of Time as well.

[DF]: Uhh guys, sorry to break this to you, but you might not want to come over here
[DF]: you see, everything is FALCON DEAD.
[DF]: Except for Bear sprite, he's still here.
[DF]: so if you are going to come here, you gotta be extra FALCON CAREFUL.
[RH]: Oh, damn.
[RH]: Must be a rocketing problem.
[RH]: How about the boss, is it dead?

[VH]: ...
[VH]: I'm sorry, but...what?
[VH]: Why, exactly, is everything dead?
[VH]: What happened, pray tell?

[DF]: Well, it may have to do with my FALCON TITLE.
[DF]: from what I FALCON GATHERED, the prince of life just had to kill things.
[DF]: I just started beating stuff up, then suddenly the ground under me started to come alive and eat stuff.
[DF]: so, do any of you know how to FALCON FLY?
[VH]: Oh dear.
[VH]: That does pose a problem.
[VH]: Huh.
[VH]: I think I may have an idea.
[VH]: I do believe I am available to present a form of...
[VH]: Hope. in a sense.
[VH]: I shall make my way to your land, Elix.
[VH]: Once there...well, you'll see.
[VH]: I am in a certain mood at present moment.
[VH]: The mood one might say...
[VH]: Drop some ill beats.
[VH]: That shall allow us to all 'hang out' at LOSAM
[VH]: So then, I shall make my way there now.
[VH]: Oh, Elix, I shall require you to connect to Miss Howard as her Server Player before I will be able to finilize my journey to your land.
[VH]: Would you please kindly do so with all hasty capability?
[VH]: Oh, that's my cue to leave the stage.
[VH]: See you all in the next scene.

valdephonousHost [VH] ceased responding to memo.

Fastus was ready. He smiled, finalizing the last of his alchemized creations. Besides for creating a neat pair of computer glasses, he had accumulated a good triad of powerful (or they looked powerful anyways) weapons. First, there was his Poolsichord. It was really just an array of pool balls that play notes when struck with the white key that came with it or an object that has been struck by the white key or an object that has been-etc. The notes themselves had some sort of magic powers though, or something like magic. The music had blew a hole in his living room while he was testing it out. Next, the Grand Gauntlets. The two gloves could conjure a playable floating keyboard in mid air. Again, the music generated by the instrument was extremely strong. The last was his Net of Lies. As its name suggested, it was a net. When thrown, however, it became large enough to form a sort of cage around his target - a lame stuffed animal in this case. The ‘bars’ of the ‘cage’ were a little bit like strings of a harp, able to be played. Whatever notes were created only affected the inside of the net. Thankfully, he hadn’t really liked the stuffed animal anyway. And now he stood at the door to his home, inventory packed and Fastus dressed in his finest suit. His hand had only brushed the door handle when he heard his sister snore loudly behind him. The poor slob was still passed out on the couch, a bottle of some alcoholic beverage clenched tightly in her hand. She had remained asleep during this entire Sburb ordeal, her booze-induced coma letting her remain completely ignorant to the current state of her environment. Fastus felt no sympathy for her, no reason to turn and feel regretful about leaving this human train wreck alone. But he did, without a clue why. Fastus crossed the room and pried the bottle out of his incapacitated guardian’s hand, tossing it through the hole in the wall. His sister let out a tiny groan, shifting in her sleep. Her brother sighed, running a hand ambivalently through his well-styled hair. Finally, he picked up the head of the stuffed bear he had exploded earlier, placing it into his sister's arms in place of the bottle. She took it and rolled over, turning her back to Fastus. The younger, although more mature, Captio turned his back as well, though he was doing so consciously. With a second sigh, he left his home. He walked straight forward, eyes moist for reasons he couldn’t explain, pulling up his glasses and wiping the tears away with the back of his hand. “No weakness.” he reminded himself.

After locating the first gate, the second one wasn’t too hard to find. Fastus passed through it and into the Land of Quartz and Art. He let out a low whistle, this place was actually pretty nice looking. A house stood alone amongst the barren landscape of rock. He approached it, walking right up to the door and hesitating for a moment - taking a good second or two to re-adjust his appearance - before knocking on the closed home portal. “Miss Howard!?” he called loudly. “Are you in there?! It’s me, valdephonusHost! Or, Fastus, if you prefer!”