North Germantown Highschool, USA

Wednesday January 20, 2010

It's one in the morning, and I just got off the phone with Sean. Have I said that I loved him before? Well if not, I really do love him. We've been talking for about weell since around 9:00. My mom came in to check on me a few times, she even talked to Sean for a while which is strange. I knew my dad loved Sean since they both liked the same thing, but I didn't think my mom thought much of him. At least until tonight, she told him she loved him like her own and was happy we were together. That made me tear up a little. Haha but my tears ended of course when my mom handed me back the phone and Sean was singing 'Single Ladies' lol. I don't think I've ever laughed so hard. Aww, mom just brought me cookies, it's 1 but she's up making cookies, I love her to death. Hmm seems I have a missed Text.

Hey Babe, Just wanted to say that you are amazing. I can't wait until we get married and have kids. Don't know what i would do without you by my side.

I had to save that text message. It was so beautiful, he always makes me smile. Well I should be getting to bed, I have school in a few hours. UGHHH!!!! Goodnight Journal haha

♥Future Mrs. Everett

It was Twelve o'clock that day when Joan was woken up by her mother. Nicole stood over her daughter shaking the life out of her. "Joan wake up! Honey wake up!" Joan opened her eyes as she felt a tear hit her face. "Mom, whats wrong? Is dad alright?" Joan always worried about her father, he was a police officer, and it was never an easy job for anybody. In that instant Joans' life was turned upside down and crushed when her mom said those fateful words. "Sean was killed this morning Joan, " Her mom said as she held onto Joan so tightly. "No! Mom, no! there was a mistake Sean is alive see!" Joan grabbed her phone and saw the last text message she had received from Sean,

10:30am Some one is shooting baby, I love you. Forever and always

Joan screamed and pushed her mother out of the way. Running down the steps she was greeted by several officers who tried to detain her. "No! Let me go, I have to find Sean I have to!" She yelled. In her Black and white pajamas Joan ran out the front door, barefoot and destined for the school. There was a blockade down her street but she slipped through the officers. In tears she made it to the school in under three minutes. Passing by Mrs. Lindes' house she notice her car was gone. As she reached the school grounds her father caught her and held her as Seans body was seen being wheeled away. "No!!" She yelled.

"Sean!" Joan yelled in her sleep. Sitting up she saw her bed was soaked. She had cried so much and began sweating somewhere in the middle of the night that her bed was soaked. Sitting there she pulled her knees to her chest and cried. "Sean" She whispered as her father came into the room and hugged her. "Joan, it's... it's going to be alright" He said in a reassuring tone. Even he knew that nothing would be the same in his daughters life.

The sun rose on it's usual route on that fateful morning but Kristin Linde hadn't gotten up as early as she normally did. The sun peeked through the dark curtains of her room the glare seemed to wake her up. She rolled onto her side so her back was facing the window and yawned. She wasn't a morning person, which was perhaps why she had convinced the principal not to give her any classes first period. Sure, she would love the extra time in fourth period when it was so long to have a planning period but there was no way even with four cups of coffee she would be able to teach a class at seven in the morning. Her sleepy eyes opened a little to peek at her alarm clock then closed once more to go back to sleep.

"Shit!" The light haired brunette cried, sitting straight up. It was seven forty nine. She had to be at the school in less than eleven minutes. before her first class started without her. Scrambling out of bed, she hurried around her bathroom and bedroom. She scrubbed her face then brushed her teeth before dabbing on deodorant. She threw on the black pencil skirt she had worn the night before on her date with Gregory and a cream button up silk blouse. Luckily, she had a blue cardigan hanging over the back of her car seat. She carried a pair of black heels as she grabbed some fruit for breakfast and rushed out the door.

Living in a house less than two minutes away from school, had it's advantages and disadvantages. The advantages were, she could make it to school in record time when she was late. One of the disadvantages was that when a football game or some other event was going on at the school, she heard it all the way from her house. Kristin Linde looked back on that day as she walked into the school and kicked herself for having not realized something was wrong. She stopped in her class room to unlock the doors and flip on the lights before she hurried off through the back hallway that connected the drama class room, dressing rooms and stage to each other. She left her purse locked away in her class room but brought her little suitcase with her to pass out the play her first year Theatre Appreciation class would be critiquing. She stopped at the table that she kept on the stage during classes and put her bag there.

As she began to pull out her lesson plan and the different worksheets she had printed out, the auditorium opened then slammed shut. The sound echoed around the quite room and the nearly empty school as well. Her brown eyes looked to where the sound came from and rested on a small boy she knew to be Joseph Lexington. She smiled at him sincerely. She remembered how heart broken he had been not having got the lead in the musical. He had gotten one of the backup dancer parts though. She had seen potential in the freshman but the senior who had gotten the part over him was definitely the better singer. "Hey Joseph. You know, next time you can audition for the lead again. Just until then you have to work really hard on your voice and you'll definitely have a bigger role next year." She told him, her smile widening. "Remember there are no small parts only small actors." She winked at him and was about to turn back to her work when Joseph started screaming at her.

Ms. Linde was stunned at the words he called her. "Stupid bitch" and "cunt" were just two of his chosen insults. When he pulled the gun out of his pocket, her blood just seemed to turn cold. She didn't even have a chance to try and calm him down or run before he squeezed off a round, hitting her square in the chest. The harsh sound echoed throughout the auditorium. Everything seemed to play out in slow motion. Her teary eyes traveled down to the spot where she felt the bullet hit her. She didn't recognize the blood that spilled from her chest till she brought her hand up to the wound then brought it away to see the blood. "J-Jo-seph..." She barely managed to say above a whisper as she looked back up at the teenager standing before her. Everything got hazy around the edges. As her knees gave out from under her, she was consumed in complete darkness.

Gasping, Kristin Linde sat up in bed, looking all around her for the teenager who nearly ended her life. He wasn't there. It was all just a dream. Just like every other night since then. And just like those previous nights, she didn't lay back down. Instead, she slipped out of her bed and followed her memorized path to the master bathroom. She discarded her t-shirt and undergarments on the floor before she slipped into a warm shower. After getting out, she dried off and let her curls dry naturally as she applied a touch of make up. She slipped into a pair of sandals and a floral knee length dress. It had a sweetheart neckline but it was high enough that it covered the ugly red scar left behind from the bullet and the intensive surgery she had been through to save her life. She drove to school but when she parked and cut the engine, but she couldn't seem to make herself get out of the car. She sat there in silence, not sure if she could face her fears and walk back into the school that nearly ended her life and where so many people she knew had died.

Molly Cooper woke up in the morning to an unsettling house. It was dark, like it always is when she gets up to go to school. She bit her lip softly and stood. She shivered with memories of the past and memories of what people thought of her now. She shook her head, she really didn't know what was going to happen.

She walked over to her dresser and looked at the pictures glued around her mirror. All of them were of her and Joseph and she bit back her tears. She missed him, even if he had killed so many. She remembered seeing him that day:

"Joseph..come on..put the gun down," she said to him, soothingly. He was holding towards himself, crying.

"Shut up!" He screamed. He had never looked so wild and scary. His hands were shaking as he held the gun right to his head. It was too late for the others, but maybe she could save Joseph. He could get some help and everything would be ok again. She repeated his name. "Shut up! Molly, I'll turn this gun on you! SHUT UP!"

So, she did. And the silence was broken with a final boom.

She shook herself free of the terrible memory to see that her hands were gripping her dresser so hard, her knuckles were white. She turned and moved like a robot to get ready for school. She looked at herself in the mirror, once she was done. She smiled and even though it looked strange, she still looked happy.

The bus ride was silent because most of the students were still shocked. Despite the fact that they tried to bury the past, as the drove to the school, it all came back. She pounded down the stairs, ignoring the cruel glares of others. They all thought she had known, but she didn't.

"Here goes nothing," she muttered, putting a small smile on her face as she moved into the school.

Danielle pulled herself out of bed, unwillingly as the alarm clock rang out loud, obnoxiously in her left ear. She slammed her hand on the snooze button. She rubbed her eyes, and blinked gingerly a few times before opening her eyes. She ran her hand through her red hair. She knew what was coming. She would be taunted, as well as Molly would. She still remembered it clearly.

"Molly, what just happened in there?" She said, tears running down her face, hiding under the desk in the room next to where Joseph and Molly had been.

"He's dead…" Molly whispered, crying. Danielle didn't comprehend. She wasn't stupid, she was in disbelief. "What did you say?" She said, lifting her head. "Please tell me you didn't say my brother is dead," She snaked out from her shaky voice.

"He's dead, Danielle. I tried to stop him…Believe me…I tried," Molly squeaked. But it was all over. Joseph, her brother whom she told everything, was dead. He killed himself.

She blinked one more time, getting rid of the memory. She shivered. She approached the bathroom, throwing some water onto her face and applying face lotion. She flat ironed her hair, and walked back out to her room. She pulled on light skinny jeans, and a black half-length sleeve shirt, and put a white belt just above her waist on the shirt. She fixed her necklace into position, and slid on black ankle-boots. She then walked back to the bathroom, brushing her teeth, and applying black eyeliner around her eye. She applied black mascara, and curled her eyelashes. She carefully applied red lipstick precisely onto her lips, applying a red colored gloss over the lip stick. She made sure her skin was perfect, which is was, and that none of nail polish has chipped.

She threw her brown leather backpack over her shoulders that she had been using for the past year. As she approached the door, she knew what was coming for her. She sat down in her white Toyota Prius, putting her bag in the seat next to her. She popped a piece of Extra Mint Gum into her mouth, and ignited the engine. When she pulled into the parking lot of school, she exhaled. She pulled the keys out of the car and dropped them in her bag, while she checked her phone. She sent a text to Molly.

Good luck.

She walked out of the car, and up the stairs to the school. A few cold eyes glared at her. Danielle pretended not to notice, but she did. She had a small, porcelain smile on her lips. She was scared to enter the building.

Gregory Owen has always arrived at school extremely early. It was a habit he wouldn't let go of. The few hours before the first bell were relaxing to him. Of course, he wasn't able to squeeze in a full eight hour night of sleep, but the few little moments of close-eyes he'd managed to get would be enough. What has happened after the shooting? Greg was shattered by guilt. He desperately tried to admit to the fact that he could do nothing, but the lingering feeling that he was able was eating him apart. During the days that he'd spent sleeping by Kristin's side were the days their relationship became news. He didn't mind the pleasant scandal.

Now that those days were in the past, Greg and Kristin actually moved in together. All seemed to go well. Though at times their positive and pleasant lifestyle would be interrupted by nightly screams and sweats, bitter thoughts, and attitudes that wouldn't let go of the past. Greg still held himself accountable, but he couldn't very well share that with Kristin.

Sitting behind his desk that had music sheets scattered over it, Greg was contemplating his day. It was early still, and Kristin would be arriving any time soon. He'd already been here for two hours, and he couldn't help but feel like those hours flew by in an unpleasant speed. He lifted his hand to run his fingers through his short hair, then pinched the bridge of his nose in irritation. Greg's been getting these sharp head-aches, that could only be a result of too much thought and stress. However, that pain was brief, and once it passed, he glanced up at the digital clock on the wall with impatience.

Life played a terrible tune these days, and Greg couldn't help but feel the pressure of silence. His songs have diminished almost completely.

Things weren't going as Charles had planned them too. Things never went the way he wanted. It was just impossible and certainly unexplainable, the reasons that Charles Horton was constantly knocked down. He hadn't exactly enjoyed his summer so far, it had been boring, dull and downright depressing. He finally accepted the fact he was going to be repeating his senior year. It was bad enough he had to go back in the first place, not to mention having to repeat everything he had flunked the year before. He passed the summer spending time at the Holt's house, jogging daily and practising his throwing.

It was eight in the morning, the sun was halfway towards its peak height in the sky and Charlie stood in front of his bathroom mirror adjusting himself. He still couldn't quite comprehend the fact that he was going back to that place. That place where he had grown up, that place which was full of good memories and his hopes and dreams. Nothing could outweigh the one fact that scared the life out of him, so much so as to give him palpitations. The fact that it was always going to be associated with death, more so the death of his lover and best friend, Beth.

It had to be done though if he wanted to get anywhere in life. His sports achievements stood for nothing without grades to back them up. Charlie took a deep breath and nodded at himself in the mirror. A nod which meant, "You can do this. Chin up man, it'll be fine." He threw his bag over his shoulder and grabbed his car keys. He had just bought it before she... They had even called it Betty. The senior jogged down the stairs and headed out the front door.

"Hey, Charles? Charles! Come back, I want to talk to you!" He could hear his mother shouting from the kitchen. There was no way she was going to try and see if he was feeling ok. He knew she would only piss him off so he ignored her, "Bye Mom." He flung his bag into the front seat of his car and, after blaring the radio full blast, he was off. This was it - he was really going back, back to face his demons. Demons summoned by the devil worshipper himself, Joseph Lexington. Even the thought of him made Charlie's blood boil.

After parking his car in the student lot, he headed towards the side entrance to the school. The bench area just inside the side door was where the guys on the football team hung out. He just wanted to get the first day over with, meeting as few people as possible. However, his trail of thought was lost when he spotted her. Her bright red hair stuck out a mile away, he didn't need to make sure - he knew it was her.

The anger inside him took over control of his body as words he had been planning on saying to the Lexington family, had he ever met them, began to burst into his mind like fireworks. He couldn't help himself, it was like he was drawn towards her by some unseen magnetic force.

"Oi! Lexington! How dare you show your face back here again you stupid whore!"

He shouted across the parking lot, his heart beating a hundred miles an hour. He couldn't keep it in, he knew people were watching and staring in shock but he didn't care. The dumb bitch's brother killed students, teachers and his Bethany, yet she had the nerve to show her face here again. That freak show of a family should have been locked up at the very least.

((Feel proud, Irishguy. You just made me go look at the characters I made to figure out who had the last name Holt. XD))

Taking a large, calming breathe, Kristin Linde grabbed her bag that held her lesson plans and got out of her car. She left the sweater she wore to cover her shoulders unbuttoned. She pressed the lock button on her keys for her dark blue volvo she named Sparrow. As she walked in the direction the voice of one of her students floated to her. She stopped in her tracks, unable to believe what she was hearing. Not only did this give her flash of what happened six months ago, but she was outraged to hear Charles blaming Danielle for what Joseph did. No matter what she thought of Joseph, she wouldn't blame her. She couldn't have known what he was capable of.

"Charles Horton!" Kristin said from behind him, crossing her arms. "I hope you were not calling one of your fellow classmates that." She said, closing the distance between them. "I don't want to hear talk like that this year. Your not the only one whose grieving." She said, giving him a stern look before she walked away and headed into the school. She made her way through the halls that were now filling up with students. She unlocked the door to her classroom and flipped on the light. She put down her bag by her desk but then continued down the hall till she found Gregory's room.

Stopping in the doorway, she leaned against the door frame just watching him for a moment. He had a way of taking her breathe away even when he was just closing his eyes. She could remember the first day she met him. It was at a picnic for the teachers at the principals house. She knew he was perfect for her the moment she met him. Even when she nearly did a face plant in front of him, he only ever teased her, later when they started dating, about how she had fallen him.

"You look tired." Kristin said, crossing the floor to come and stand behind him. She leaned down, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and giving him a quick peck on the cheek. "Are you okay?" She asked him, her voice full of concern for him. Ever since the shooting, he had been getting just about as much sleep as her. He was glad when he brought up living together. She felt safer when she slept in his arms. Now she only woke up in panic when he wasn't there. She didn't tell this of course. If he wanted to get up early, she wouldn't stop him.

Molly walked into the school with her head held high. She wasn't going to let the stares of others ruin her year. She wouldn't let other people, who were grieving like herself, make her feel worse. She couldn't allow it. She smiled at some people, but only received a few glares in a return; others ignored her.

She stood in front of the locker she used to share with Joseph. She stared at the door of the locker, taking a deep breath. Her phone had buzzed before and she took it from her pocket. A small smile fluttered on her face as she got her message from Danielle.

Thanks. You too. Keep your head up beautiful.

The message gave her a bit of courage to open the locker. She looked at the pictures still on the door that she didn't have the heart to take down. She touched one lightly, looking at the smile on Joseph's face. She closed her eyes. She was his best friend, how could she not see the smile was fake?

She closed her eyes. If would have spoken up and not shut up, if she had tried talking to him more, then he would still be here. She closed her eyes again. She will always feel like it was her fault that Joseph isn't here. She touched the picture one more time.

I'm sorry, was all that came to her mind.

She put her bag into the locker, that was empty without Joseph's clutter, and grabbed a book that she had gotten at open house. She turned around staring at the school. The whole school had been repainted, plants had been planted. Never the less, the school still had a grim look to it.

Would it ever be the same again?

Danielle didn't even bother to turn around. She just shook her head, pulling her bag up further onto her shoulder. She knew he would taunt her; he was one of the ones she had to look out for. She didn't appreciate being called a whore, but she wasn't going to show that it hurt her. She pursed her lips, and continued on into the school. She was waiting for his next comment; rotten bitch, spoiled brat, whatever was coming next, she could take it. At least, she thought so. She pulled her phone out of her pocket.
It brought a smile to her lips. Molly and Danielle had been getting along lately, not that they hadn't before, but better then ever now.

Don't worry about me. Don't let anybody else bring you down. Love ya.

When she approached her locker, she opened it hesitantly. The shelf was still there, the family picture, some of her leftover things. As she unloaded her books, a touch of sadness over came her. But she wasn't going to let that family picture hold her down.

This year she wouldn't be dragged down by what Joseph had done. This year, she would be happy. Finally.

Joan, finally snapped out of the past. Stood like a brainless Zombie from her bed. Looking at her clock she noticed she didn't have much time before school had started. Obviously she didn't care anymore.

As her dad left her room she sat down at her laptop turning it on her eyes filled with tears as she saw the photo her cousin had taken of her and Sean. Slamming the screen shut she went into her purple bathroom and took a hot shower.

Standing under the hot water Joan realized this would be her first day back to school since then. Last year after all the kids went back she stayed at home for months, in Seans jersey, no shower, and she ate when she had to so she became pretty skinny. Looking down as the water ran into the drain she just sat on the shower floor for what seemed like hours until her mom came into her bathroom.

"Jo-Jo, look I know you don't want to go back, and I know your hurting. But you have to. I don't know what will make this better for you, but you have to go back" Her mother looked at her on the shower floor and walked out with a sigh.

Finally finished with her shower Joan got out and got dressed, grabbing everything She needed for that day she stepped out the door with her Hat on and got into her car.

Pulling up to the school, Dani was the first person she saw. Pulling it together She stepped out of the car and screamed at the top of her lungs befor punching the hood of her car.

"I can't go back in there" She said to herself before sliding to the ground in front of the whole school. Reaching in her pocket she felt the one thing that was keeping her sane. Her Razor. Slicing the top of her wrst while her hand was still hidden in her pocket she looked up at the sky. "Why?" She whispered in tears. "Why!"

"Dumbass cow!" The only words that came to mind after his outburst at the one person that he knew would drag him down this year. She didn't even have the guts to acknowledge him, as if nothing had happened and that he was just some raving lunatic on a drug high. She was going to pay for that, bloody scum. He had good mind to go after her and let her know her know exactly how he was feeling right to her stupid face. That was until he was stopped by a brick wall, or a teacher, whatever you want to call it.

Ms. Linde stood right next to him condemning his attack and giving him dirty looks. What the hell was going on here? Didn't anyone else think it was just tad strange that the family of the dude who pulled a gun out on his teachers and classmates was walking around their school? No one heard of the well known saying goes, 'It runs in the family?' As the blonde drama teacher left his company he couldn't help but mutter, "Bite me," under his breath. If no one else at this school was going to do anything about having a possible homicidal maniac amongst them, then he was going to have to do it himself.

"Oi, Horton! What's up man?" One of the guys on the football team spotted him as he was heading into school. "C'mon we're going to be late." He said punching Charlie lightly on the shoulder. He playfully pulled him towards the school as he walked. Moments later, all his rage had dissipated and he was calm once again. He knew from then on, that he and that Lexington girl could not go to the same school together. She had to go.

The school hallways were bustling with activity, with teachers heading towards the teacher's lounge, students chatting happily about their summers and some students stuffing their lockers with useless crap and books. Speaking of useless crap - he spotted one of Joseph's friends. Glaring in her direction, he pulled a cent from his pocket and flicked it at her head. "Freak," he whispered to her as he walked passed and sneered at her tauntingly. It was going to be a long year if had to look at the shower of weirdos Joseph left behind. Hopefully it wasn't long before he ran them out of the place.

Drama first period. Great.

Danielle pulled a few books out from her locker, then closed it quietly, putting her phone in her pants pocket. She didn't respond to him again. Showing that she cared would make this game easier for him. She easily walked right past him, in no reguards to say anything to him.

She looked around for one of her friends that didn't think she was crazy, Alex. Ever since Joseph..Well..You know, Alex hadn't blamed her for anything that happened that day. She appreciated that. Lots of kids in this school blamed her, but few didn't. And Alex was one that was willing to talk to her.

She had English first period, but it didn't start for another good 10 minutes. She pulled out her flip phone and texted Alex.

Anywhere I can find you?

She put it back in her pocket, leaning against a wall to wait for him. She held her books in her left arm, and ignored any snotty looks she got from passing by students.

This school year wouldn't be controlled by Joseph.

Rummaging for a few textbooks in his locker, Rex Rowen wondered to himself if he had left the stove on at home. After getting two texts he slammed thw door shut and stuffed the heavy books into his, black, JanSport book bag. Adjusting one strap comfortably over his left shoulder he turned and started for class remembering that he did shut it off when he had made coffee. With a sigh relieved he looked up to acknowledge his surroundings.

For half a second the halls looked as though the lights were flickering dim, with a messy trail of blood running down the polished linoleum floor.

Shaking the memory of that haunting day out of his mind, he instead focused on remembering what project was due today, one that acquired him to present a power point in front of the class. Rex didn't mind those sort of things, he was never really a shy type of guy. He's mostly comfortable around his peers, but since that day it left him rattled and instead of seeking medical help, (like from a shrink) he adamantly refused. Assuring himself that this was something he had to deal with on his own; get over it. He never really did.

Yawning tiredly as he walked into an empty classroom he would continue down the rows of empty desks until he reached the very end of the room. Dropping his bag onto the floor beside him he slumped into the seat and leaned his head back. Closing his eyes he took a long deep breath meant to relax himself. Even a memory managed to tense him up and make him edgy for the entire day.

Loosen up Rex, it's a new day man, you gotta let it go. What was done is done, he's dead now and he'll always be dead. No need to freak out over it...


The young man opened his eyes to stare at the green chalk board in front of him. He imagined it bloody, from some professor who was thrusted into it by the pressure of a bullet striking into him. Clenching his jaw he shut his eyes and pushed that image out of his mind, even whilst awake he couldn't escape the nightmare.

Gripping the side of his head he tried to even his hitched breathing, clenching and unclenching his other fist as if trying to remind himself that he was alive and awake. He managed to calm himself some before resting his head against his arm on the desk. Breathing slowly, just breathing, alone in the history room...

Molly smiled at the text Danielle sent her, and she pocketed her phone with a happier feeling settling over her. She looked at the clock, knowing she'd have only a few minutes before she'd have to go to her Teacher Assisting Class. It was her second year of Teacher Assisting so she knew she'd be sent to a classroom right away.

She turned again, to reopen her locker and grab her pink fluffy pen that Joseph gave her. While she was turned, a penny was chucked at her head. It was followed by a muttered insult. She knew she couldn't let it bother her, so she grabbed the penny and smiled. "Find a penny, pick it up, and all day you'll have good luck."

Finally, the bell rang. It was just the first bell, signaling kids should start reporting to class. She walked towards her class, passing her father who was running late to his class. He had a fresh coffee stain on his shirt. Molly shook her head, preferring to seem like she wasn't related to him or better yet, made of him. She entered her class, signed it, and looked to see where she was assigned.

She entered Katherine Warren's room. "Mrs. Warren, when are you due?" She asked, receiving a sad smile and a reply of September. She had helped Mrs. Warren towards the end of the year last year so it was no shock that Mrs. Warren remembered her. "Do you need me to do anything just yet?"

Molly assumed she didn't, seeing as it was the first day. So, she decided to make herself invisible for now. After all, no one wanted to see the girl who supposedly knew the shooting was going to happen the whole time. She winced a little and sat down in the back.

As the bell rung, Joan was snapped back into reality that she would sooner or later have to re-enter GermanTown High.
With a sigh she grabbed her things, looking at the dried blood on her wrist. I'll wash it off later She said to herself. Making her way inside the school she kept her head down. She knew that if she were to look up she'd see something.. or someone she didn't want to see.

Mindlessly Joan made it to her locker on the second floor. 13-32-3 her locker opened. Shoving her books and everything inside she placed a magnetic mirror and a picture of her and Sean on the inside of the door. Pulling her back pack tightly over her left shoulder she headed back down the stairs.

Tripping on the very last step, the books Joan had in her hands went flying. "Shit!" She said as she watched the papers scatter. Picking them up she continued on to the first floor. Walking by the front office she considered going inside to dismiss herself, but she had to face it.

Joan continued down the hallway towards The theater room. Slowly she opened the door, there were two kids inside already. She found herself a place to sit behind everyone as she waited for the theater teacher to arrive.

Eddie groaned, he was making his way to school, he was late of course, but it didn't matter, ever since Sean's death he'd changed, he'd known Sean since Kindergarten, before that, they'd first met because there familieis went to the same church, it was sad, Joseph had ended his life. That Little Rat Bastard. He thought stopping at a red light, he was glad Joan was still here, she was his closest friend aside from Sean, but she'd changed after the shooting. He knew it, he'd tried to comfort her, he remembered the last text message he received from Sean, that day before his life had been taken, as well as many other good people.

Hey Eddie, your the best friend i could ever have, I heard bullets, please take care of Joan.. He had saved the message, it never failed, every time he looked at it..tears began streaming down his face. No matter what he wouldn't fail his friend, he wouldn't let anybody hurt Joan, the light flashed green, and he revved the engine before heading forward, he was nearing his school, he needed to stop getting tardied, although his mother didn't nag. She knew this was the second death that had affected him, his father's death a few years ago had affected him. He wondered why everytime he grew close to people, they seemed to die. The thing he feared the most was not loosing his own life, but loosing his mother, and Joan, if that happened, life would have lost all meaning in his eyes, he'd have no reason not to take his own life.

Finally getting to the school, he parked his vehicle, and put away his phone, staring at the messages Sean had sent him wouldn't help him get better. I miss ya man, and I don't know what to do, but I'll take care of your girl, I'll help your parents at the shop. He opened up his glove compartment where he left a spare tissue box. He picked up some tissues, and dabbed at his face. Wiping the tears off he tossed the tissues onto the ground, and locked his car,b before heading to school the first bell had already rung, he just wanted to see Joan, she was the one person who made him felt better. Making his way through the hallways, he got to his locker, which was right by the Girl's changing room, he remembered how Sean helped him get this locker. Another sad memory. Dear God Please..please..help me get through this, I don't know what to do anymore, I just want to make the right choices in life, I want to make this pain go away.

Finishing his silent prayer, he opened up his locker, and he grabbed his book, he struggled to remember his schedule. His first class was theater. Already on the first floor, he made his way into the class room slipping inside, noticing the teacher was not there. He spotted Joan, and went after her to giving her a brief hug. "Hey Joan, it's good to see you again" He said as he settled down wondering where the teacher was.

Joan had been busy the last few minutes drawing in her note book. She had draw so many Hearts that the book began to look like one huge scribble pad. Pulling out her cell phone she scrolled through all of her old pictures. She had locked every last one of them, she didn't want to lose her memory of Sean. With a sigh she sat her phone down gently, on her desk.

Looking up she saw Eddie walk into the room, she was happy to see him, but just couldn't bring herself to show it. As he hugged her she gave him a brief smile and spoke in a cracked voice. "Glad to see somebody I know in this class" She felt the knot in her throat forming once more, and tried fighting it back. Turning her head away from eddie she let the silent tears fall as she pretended to look through her bag for a pen. "Hey Eddie? DO you have a pen?" She said whipping her eyes turning back towards him.

Eddie was glad Joan was in class, he didn't know if she was up to it. He was heavily affected by Sean's death of course, but her even more so, they were in love, and Joseph had stripped her of the man she loved. He had a hate for Joseph, but even more so he had a hatred of what triggered the shooting in the first place, bullies, he'd always had a protective streak, he'd been nicknamed the School's "Sheriff" but about last year, wanting to get a good reputation, and have a clean college application he'd stopped getting into fights, stopped helping those who were picked on, it seemed he'd picked the wrong year to stop, he was just finding more reasons to blame himself for Joseph's death.

I gotta get that out of my mind, I still have Joan my mom. He hadn't even been paying attention in the class, not that paying attention mattered right now. The teacher still hadn't shown up, he wondered how the teachers had dealt with the attack. "I'm glad to have a friend in the class" He said in response to her comment, as she asked for a pen, he fumbled through his pocket, his cell phone, a pack of Stride Gum, a pepper mint, a broken pencil, and yes a black ballpoint pen, he took the pencil out, and handed it to Joan. "Yea Here ya go." He held the pen out for her to take. He could tell her voice was cracking, he wondered if anybody would ever get over the shooting, at the moment he didn't think he would.

Danielle took a seat in the back-middle of the classroom. She set her textbooks and binders in the right side of her desk, pulling out a piece of paper and a pencil. A few kids shouted names at her that were better than the ones she'd been called before; like "Bitch" or "Nasty whore." She knew it was coming, she didn't let it affect her. Danielle was stronger than she had been last year.

She came prepared today. She knew herself and Mollie would be able to make it through. People had been outlawing Mollie, but she would not treat her brother's best friend in such a way. No matter what it took, Danielle would be the good girl in this scene. She knew what she was in for, but she knew she'd be okay. Things would smoothen out sooner or later, no matter how long it took.

"Hmm.." She mumbled, running her hand through her red hair. She knew when this class filled out, she would be the outlaw. But Alex and Mollie would not treat her in the same way; her and Alex had been best friends for a while. They even discussed it over the summer; he didn't blame her for what her brother did. In fact, he didn't even degrade her any bit. It proved to her that she could tell him anything, tell him how she was feeling. And she could say the same for Mollie; they had been texting over the months and Danielle had helped her get back into her comfort zone.

She was glad she could be there for them. She knew it was just as hard on them as it was for her. After all, she lost somebody too. She lost her own brother.

Joan took the pen and pulled out her notebook with the words JoJO and Sean written on the front. Flipping to a back page she rested her head on her arm keeping her face from Eddie.

Dear Sean,

It's been a year since the shooting. I still have your text and all of the stuff you gave me. I would be happy if this were just a big joke that everybody decided to play on me. If it was, I would be the happiest girl in the world. Every night that I have to go to sleep without you holding me, or brushing my hair is like Hell. I know this time you can't write me back, but I refuse to stop writing you, I even got a new notebook incase this one runs out of paper see... Sean I love you, and I miss you with all of my heart. I just can't let you go

Joan closed the notebook and whipped away a tear that had fallen. She couldn't bring herself to look up at Eddie. "I..I'm being such a baby" She said as she burst into tears burying her head into her arms. "I shouldn't be crying, I should be happy that he is in a better place right?" She said looking up at Eddie with blood shot eyes.

(Who plays the Teacher in Theater?)

Eddie felt bad for Joan, but what could he do. He wasn't Jesus, he couldn't bring Sean back. He wondered if this pain would ever end? He'd heard on movies about people 'moving on' but he didn't think he'd ever move on, he kept thinking about the deaths, the school was changed forever. He had noticed the writing on the note book. Damn she's really missing Sean, why didn't somebody stop Joseph, where the hell were the police that day.

He didn't know how to respond to Joan, he couldn't tell her things could get better, they weren't for him. But then maybe he could lie, that might be good considering the situation. "No your not Joan" He said trying to cheer her up. He nodded. "You know he's in Heaven, smiling down on you, I promise" He said putting a hand on her shoulder, she was crying hard, he wanted the teacher to come in.

Joan nodded and looked away from Eddie. "I'll be back" Standing from her desk she grabbed her phone and walked silently out of the class room, hanging her head down. She made her way through the student filled halls, all strangely silent as the kids passed her. She pushed open the door to the restroom and entered the large handicap stall. She pulled out her cellphone and texted Eddie. I can't do this anymore From her pocket she pulled out two pill bottles stuffed with cotton. Without thinking she downed the bottle of pain killers, possibly fifteen in all, and a second bottle of aspirin, six pills at the most.

Ten minutes later, the crowd in the halls had dulled down, and the kids seemed to buzz by her in a slow motion fade. Feeling on the walls she made her way back towards the theater room. She made it to the door and spotted Eddie still at his desk. Her heart began beating wildly like a drum before she felt a sharp pain. Before she knew it blood was coming from her mouth. "Eddie..." She managed to get out quietly before she blacked out and hit the ground.

Charlie entered the theatre room and let the double doors automatically close behind him. There were a few students already there but class hadn't started yet which made Charlie sigh to himself. Not only had he got crap drama class to look forward to but he had to sit and wait amongst a class full of people that supported a homicidal family. Great, just great. He dropped his bag on the ground and sat down, trying his best to not make eye contact with anyone. The last thing he wanted was to get into conversation with some douche about summer and petty, small talk.

The senior pulled out his phone with one hand and fiddled with idly, still intent on not making eye contact with anyone. He used the other hand to rest his head to half block out the view to his right. To his left he could see a few students, engaged in the small talk he was trying so eagerly to avoid. Topics such as graduation, summer holidays and even current affairs were all being discussed. One topic Charlie didn't hear being discussed was on how Lexington's sister and his friends, who knew what was going on all along, were still allowed attend the school that had suffered so much tragedy already.

Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted one Joan Thorton-Everett leaving the theatre. She had no bag with her so he figured she'd be back. He also figured she and him had a common enemy. The Lexington bastard had taken her world from her as he taken Charlie's world from him - he had killed her long-term boyfriend, Sean Everett. Charles knew Sean well as they were both seniors at the time and he was probably the person Charles missed most after Beth. As his eyes followed Joan out of the room, he turned his attention to where she might be sitting to see Eddie Hart near where Charlie assumed she was sitting.

Eddie had quit the team over the summer and Charles was pretty pissed about it. Eddie was one of the best players on the high school team and he seemed to have a promising career ahead of him. For someone who hadn't lost as much as others had during the shootings, he sure had taken it harder than most. Charles Horton was going to get Eddie back on the team. Yeah, that was going to be his focus now and hopefully keep his mind off of the losers that supported murder. He quickly shot off his seat, grabbed his bag and headed over towards Eddie. His mouth opened to call Eddie's name but something caught his eye towards the entrance to the room.

Joan had returned but looked sick, incredibly sick at that. Charles couldn't believe what he was seeing; she had looked fine before she left. Then before he could say or do anything, she collapsed to the floor. As an instant reaction he rushed towards her and shouted, "Eddie!!" This was not how he saw his first day back to this hell hole.