» "Within my dreams, I find my peace." «
Star Stealing Girl || Chrono Cross OST
Higurashi no Naku Koro ni || Dear You (Original)
Annalise Cassadine // Anna -or- Anne
|{ Age }|
15
|{ Sexuality }|
Asexual
|{ Role }|
Orphan
|{ Face Claim }|
Mikazuki Yozora
5'4" // 115 lbs
|{ Appearance }|
Annalise is a young girl of a small stature. Her body frame is thin and underweight accompanied by her small hands and feet. The weight loss is attributed to her depressive state of mind and medications. She is very frail, unable to lift anything heavy or defend herself. Her irises are of a translucent shade of purple and her expression is usually very soft and nervous looking. Anna's face is very round in shape but also narrow around her cheekbones. In fact, you can usually see her bones due to her light weight and lack of muscle. Her cheeks are usually of a rosy color which complement her purple eyes and short, brown strands of hair.
|{ Garments }|
You'll always find Annalise covered from shoulder to toe. She feels uncomfortable showing her skin so she's usually wearing sweaters and school skirts with black leggings. Anna does like to be fashionable with her attire even though she limits herself. In colder weather she'll most likely be wearing a plain pair of jeans. Anna prefers neutral colors for the most part, her wardrobe consisting of many dark blues, beige, browns, deep purples, or emerald greens. She hates bright colors so you'll never see her wearing such things.
|{ Birthmarks / Scars / Tattoos / Piercings }|
Annalise has two small piercings in her earlobes where she usually wears a cheap pair of stud earrings. She just likes how they look and hopes one day she can get herself a real pair. Though what may be most noticeable about Annalise is a very faint scar on her left wrist from a suicide attempt many years ago. Don't mistaken her for someone who cuts, it was simply a first and last attempt that miserably failed. She's never tried or even dare to cut herself again.
{x} Bipolar I
{x} Exhibits some symptoms of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.
|{ Personality }|
Introverted § Sensitive § Submissive § Sweet
While Annalise never gets physically violent with people during an episode, she'll jump from an extremely happy and active state of mind to a suicidal mindset within seconds. Due to her illness, Anna is very touchy and sensitive. Her symptoms started to present themselves in her early childhood years. One of her worst episodes occurred on a random walk home from school. She was happily listening to her music and lightly sprinting down the street in an excited manner. Anna felt invincible and as though she could fly. In her excitement she had a difficult time returning home for she began to take out her school notebooks and rip them apart. She threw the papers into the air shouting and dancing. Eventually she found herself climbing up a tall tree and attempted to jump off a branch genuinely believing she could fly away. Fortunately, there were locals around that had reported her odd and dangerous behavior. The locals managed to prevent her from jumping but could not get her to climb down from the branch. She thought it was a very fun game. Though her demeanor quickly changed when the doctors from the local clinic appeared with an ambulance. She started to scream and became hysterical. It led to her jumping off the branch after all and it was considered attempted suicide by the clinicians. No one saw her for a few weeks and when she finally returned it was as though she were a completely different person. She then entered a depressive episode, unable to stay awake at school, grew easily agitated and often walked around as an empty shell that was no longer mentally present.
The depressive side to her condition is more unsettling than fearsome. She'll go with little to no speaking for days and will keep herself emerged in her fantasy novels. Asking her things such as, "How was your day?" is enough to make her break down in tears and become hysterical. Her mind starts to race and on occasion she'll hear voices telling her to hurt herself. Though Anna is resilient to the depressive side of her condition, never listening or giving in to the crazed thoughts but each episode always take a piece of her away. Many describe her to be a walking zombie during these times. Aside from the ups and downs, there are periods of times where Anna seems to be "normal." She's visibly more approachable and much more alert to her surroundings. During these times she'll take comfort in the small things such as eating ice cream or reading a good book. Sometimes she just enjoys going on short walks, but if she's caught out too long she gets in trouble. All in all, people find it hard to associate with Anna due to her extreme condition and instability. The few friends she does have she cherishes, even if they are not necessarily healthy people to be around. She'll do just about anything they say in fear of losing her only friends. On the other hand, occasionally Anna has extremely bad depressive episodes. When this happens she becomes very self destructive and deranged. You'll find her enclosed in a small space where she starts to scream, trash her legs and arms about, pull her own hair out and even scratch her face. However, these major depressive episodes occur very rarely. For the most part she has some sort of grip on herself throughout the mood swings.
Another odd aspect of Annalise is her constant need to be perfect. Even if she absolutely despises what she's doing, it needs to be done perfectly. This trait of hers is not particularly noticeable. Rather, it's something that sort of creeps up on Anna from the shadows and not only catches others off guard but herself too. For instance, if she's drawing lines on a page it needs to be an exact, perfectly straight horizontal/vertical line. Otherwise she'll compulsively do it over until it's fine. Her notes have to be formatted somewhat carefully and she likes to be organized. But it's more like a quirk she has that occasionally slips out. Some situations she does not care if something is not neat or a mess. In fact, she'll choose to be messy. Things only get to her when she decides to be perfect but simply can't or struggles to. You'll also notice how Anna will favor certain things like odd numbers or sets of three. Her symptoms are not really noticeable or prominent in her everyday life so it slips over both the doctor's head and her own. Once the clinic noticed, they did not make a big fuss over it seeing that it did not affect Anna's life all that much. The only concern lies with whether or not her fussing would send her off into an episode.
Annalise is able to use dream manipulation. She has always lacked coping mechanisms and every night she'd pray for comfort in her dreams. What started as simply wishing for hugs and affection to appear in her dreams, ended with her complete control over such things. Over time she became exceedingly skillful at controlling her own dreams and making things happen in them that she wished for. Sometimes it'd just be for comfort while other times destruction to reflect her state of mind. When she began the newer treatments at the clinic she found herself able to dream even while conscious. She'd leave her reality and enter a dreamlike state even though she was still awake. She would usually do such things when life became too unbearable to remain awake for and witness. As her treatments progressed, her ability to shape and mold dreams to her liking and will became exceedingly stronger. Originally she'd struggle forcing herself into a dreamlike state for it required her to be extremely emotionally overwhelmed to do it. But in correlation with her treatment she was able to dream on the spot and even exert her dreams onto other people. She can make you see what she is dreaming of, or force you into a dreamlike state and pull out the delicate threads of your mind. Anna can force nightmares onto you that can seem so real it'll send the person into a temporary craze. Though she's terrified of using this ability on others than herself. In fact, since her power has become much stronger than she could have possibly imagined she begins to fear even using it on herself.
+ Nail Biting || Whenever Anna is nervous, she instinctively bites her nails. Most of the time she doesn't even realize she's doing it.
+ Perfectionism || Anna's OCD symptoms are most apparent due to her perfectionism. No matter what she does, it needs to be neat and organized in a certain way. For instance if she's writing out her notes, if she doesn't go by her own specific format she becomes flustered and agitated, will trash her notes and start over. If the corners of a page in a book are folded she'll begin to cry and become hysterical because she can't fix it and make it neat again which can lead to a bipolar episode. However, she mostly has a mild case of OCD that is very much manageable.
+ Avoiding Eye Contact || It doesn't take long to notice Anna hardly ever maintains eye contact. She'll look away as quickly as she can.
+ Humming || Annalise loves to hum soft tunes and peaceful sounds. It gives her a sense of comfort and fills the silence around her.
+ Climbing || Anna loves to climb to high places and look down on the world. Her small posture allows her to squeeze her way into smallest of places or crevices. This works to her favor when she's upset or fearful especially.
+ Playing with hair || Anna has a tendency to play with her hair a lot. It's almost a nervous habit where she feels the need to be doing some sort of activity so she resorts to this.
|{ Likes }|
+ Reading || Anna's craving for a different reality explains her obsession with fantasy novels.
+ Music || Music is the only other thing in this world that completely understands her.
+ Dancing || She's rather shy about dancing with people, but when she's alone she loves to twirl and move about, finding a freedom in dancing.
+ Ice cream || Strawberry flavored to be exact!
+ Sunny days || Nothing quite gives Anna joy like a sunny day.
+ Negativity || Even though Anna does not give the impression that she enjoys sad things or negativity, she's almost drawn to it. Addicted even. Not feeling some sort of internal conflict is awfully uncomfortable for her.
+ Social gatherings || Anna is so lonely that simply being involved with some sort of gathering even if no one talks to her makes her happy.
|{ Dislikes }|
+ Shouting/Yelling || Any time someone raises their voice is makes Annalise panic. You'll notice her quick change in demeanor as she falls extremely silent and seemingly frozen in place.
+ Medications || But they're necessary... or are they? Regardless, Anna can't stand how these medications make her feel numb and like she's dead inside.
+ Being alone || Leaving Anna by herself with her mind full of racing thoughts is a struggle for her. But it's something she'd always had to deal with.
+ Racing thoughts || It comes with the bipolar, but Anna feels absolutely crazed and tortured in her own mind. The thoughts are so quick that she struggles to reason with herself and simply acts them out instead.
|{ Talents }|
+ Singing || Annalise never sings in front of people, but if you do happen to hear her she has a very beautiful voice.
+ Pretending || She can be deceitful, but never in a malicious way. Anna is just afraid to show others her true thoughts and feelings.
+ Avoiding || Anna can blend and when she's upset she's pretty great at avoiding others. Though some can see through her antics.
+ Sensitive || You have to be cautious around Anna, because you can never be quite sure as to what will set her off.
+ Submissive || Anna just can't outright say, "no." She'll do what anyone asks of her and many take advantage.
+ Frail || Her body is weak, there's no doubts there.
+ Lying || Anna for the most part is honest with others. However, in regards to herself she'll often lie.
|{ Fears }|
+ Rejection/Abandonment || Anna was never loved. If her friends ever exclude her from things or act annoyed towards her it breaks her heart. She constantly requires reassurance that not everyone is going to leave her forever. Sometimes they just have things to do...
+ Herself || Anna is uncomfortable in her own skin and fears her own illness more than anything.
+ The clinic || They just keep forcing her into things she doesn't want. It's traumatizing there.
+ Loss || The thought of losing someone or something is unbearable.
|{ History }|
Annalise is originally not from the town of Newholt. She lived with her parents up until she was seven years old. Her parents were emotionally abusive towards her and themselves. Her entire world constantly consisted of ups and downs, starting with her parents. They never really physically harmed her too badly aside from pushing her around and pulling her hair a lot. But her parents would scream at her for no apparent reason. Anna would have done everything she was asked and then reward herself by playing with toys only to be dragged by her hair across the room and blamed for something that fell off a shelf. Shortly after she'd be locked in her room with no food for two days for bad behavior. Annalise never quite understood why this would happen. Her parents would tell her she was worthless and that she should have never been born. They'd tell her that everyone was going to hate her and that she was ugly. Gradually she started to believe them and felt she deserved to be punished as well. Sometimes they'd show her affection which made it even worse for Anna. It was a sick, twisted joke just to tease her with love and see her suffer afterwards. Sometimes they'd offer her sweets and just as she was about to take a bite they'd rip it away from her grasp and laugh in her face. It destroyed Anna's psyche. The ups and downs led to her predisposition for bipolar disorder. When her symptoms started to reveal themselves, her parents wanted nothing to do with it. When Annalise turned seven, her parents drove her out into the middle of nowhere, just outside the town of Newholt and left her on an empty road. Annalise never saw them again. When she was found by strangers she was then taken to the orphanage and lived there ever since. While life in the orphanage initially was better than the life she once had, the treatments imposed by the clinic nearby turned into something far worse than she had ever imagined. With each passing year, the treatments and inhumane treatment became worse and worse. Anne attempted suicide on multiple occasions, only to be caught every time and suffer dire consequences for her failure. It has come to the point where she is afraid to try to kill herself or show any sign of sadness in fear of what the clinic may do to her.