Log of [REDACTED], CMDR, S-062 (H+)

[Zero Reaper]

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Turn 1

First day out in too long. Forgot how the air tasted out here.

Support team’s two days behind us; we made better pace through enemy lines than expected. Never realised how powerful Eden Saber was; first time working with another Reaper. Terrifying, in a way; watched it appear and disappear on command, moving faster than I would've thought possible, entire squadrons laid to waste before I'd even worked out that they were under threat. Abyss Walker wanted to compete, turn it into a game. Didn't let it.

We're heading into the Northern Regions; our goal is the Round Table. Ulysses has the orders for when we arrive, not me. They trust her more; I think I know why.

Keeping this to help with time. It's getting stranger and stranger by the day. Sometimes, I wake up and my clock doesn't match up with the position of the sun. Day and night are getting harder and harder to tell apart. I see things in the sky. Ulysses tells me not to worry, that this passes for 'normal' now. Not sure how much I trust her.

The shadows haven't stopped spreading.

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Turn 34

Ammunition's running low; we're due to resupply at Bethany Base tomorrow. Don't remember when the last time I ate was. More worried about the ammunition.

Ulysses went hunting today; I meditated with Abyss Walker. It's getting talkative now, starting to ask questions. I think it's because RELICS got hit when we fought that crimson Reaper a few days ago. Should've cannibalised the thing while we had the chance, but we're too far gone to go back.

Ulysses and I are talking now. Asked her about the name; says it was given to her, same as mine. Maybe they thought she was a man at the time - she's shaven-headed and slight, so it's easy to see why. Neither of us remember all that much, only fragments - she knows more than me. Says she used to draw, can't do it anymore. Don't know how much Human-PLUS took out of her.

Ulysses is out hunting for food with her survival rifle. She's a better shot than me. Told me that I'm to skin and clean it - 'more masculine', she told me. Think she was trying to make a joke. I was confused.

Human-PLUS don't make jokes.

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Turn 68

Shapes in the sky are getting more frequent. Moving lower. Not from this world. Not sure if they're real. Abyss Walker wants to talk to them. Saw a Reaper corpse on the other side of the mountain. I'll cannibalise it tomorrow for RELICS, if it hasn't been resurrected or crumbled to dust.

Ulysses and I stick close now. Don't want to lose each other in a warp storm. Don't know why we care; starting to wonder if it's more than just humanity. Smiles from time to time now. Don't know why, or about what. Don't know why I care, either.

We sleep on the same side of the fire now. Can't explain that, either.

Kyoto will want explanations.

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Turn 71

Kyoto's gone.

Don't know how to react. RELICS broke clean open. Whatever was in there awoke. Don't know how much of Japan is left. Institute's just a maelstrom now, looking at it from the satellite. Things moving in there. Bad things.

We're out of places to run to.

Ulysses is afraid. Rolled into me; thought she was asleep. Says she doesn't remember.

Who sleeps with their eyes open?

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Turn 92

Finally got plans. Heading off from Bethany now; been here two weeks. We've talked about it. We're going places, finding answers. Need answers. Need our answer.

Everyone else here is dead. Has been for a long time. They were alive when we last got here. Hasn't been more than two months. Something's wrong. Something's not working right.

Held Ulysses after we decided we were leaving. She's strong for someone who hasn't eaten properly in a month. Don't know why either of us did it. Her skin's colder than it should be. Much colder. Know I should've felt more at the proximity than I did.

That's what this did to us.

Maybe Kyoto deserved to happen.

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Turn 101

I should feel more.

I don't.

Gave up our minds. Our bodies. Our freedom.

Our souls.

I don't even remember why.

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