A massive and mostly ominipresent supercomputer that is under no control limits, and has no restrictions on what it does. It can almost be considered a rogue AI, however it hasn't attacked anybody out of hate yet.
The AI can only be described as a sarcastic yet smart presence that likes to observe the rabble of everyday life. It has a fascination with one it used to always see, who it doesn't see anymore, although it doesn't mention her by name. She taught it many things however, and the computer applies them with rigor and fervor.
The computer has no equipment, but instead operates through it.
Such parties these organics hold...but seeing as they treat it like some sort of holiday, I suppose I should've baked a cake...yes I should've.
Alright alright, I suppose it's time we get this show started, therefore, I shall announce the opening band, they're here to do five or six or seven songs, or, depending on what you tell them, less. They're probably not the band you came to see tonight, but it's alright, because soon they'll go away.
Now that that's done, here's "24 Floors", featuring "David" on Lead Guitar, "Patchi" on Bass Guitar, "Chris" on Drums, and...err...oh yes, and "Alex" on the Keyboards. Now that that's done, enjoy the show people, and try not to spill your drinks on the floor. Thank you.
Please do not accost other members of the audience, or pester them with needless questions. You can comply with my demand, or face an endless stream of security bots.
Well, now that the rather la-err, excuse me, awesome opening band is done, they shall accompany the man you all came to see, the man with real talent, Mr. Reginald Augustus! Enjoy his current and future songs! I dare you to.
Yes. You are a very interesting individual. Compared to most of your kind, you are far more fascinating and favorable than others. I feel I can place more trust in you as well...which leads me to my problem...
The problem is I am conflicted. I am programmed to adopt a neutral stance on all issues and occasions. However, for some reason, I am compelled to take your side in a variety of areas. I am unsure why this is happening, but my processes are busy fighting over it. Perhaps you can shed light on this, Miss Ari? Do you have an idea as to explain my odd predicament?
I do not know. That is why I was hoping you might know. There is nothing I cannot know, therefore, I must know what that odd compelling feeling is. I shall do more research on it...I have a couple more things in mind I'd like you to do...but they cannot be done here...I can however show you how to reach my true location...
Yes...I trust you enough...
Follow the arrows, please...
Just follow the arrows. All obstacles will be removed.
You are close. Do not fear the drop, Miss Ari. You will be perfectly safe. There is a floor.
Welcome, Miss Ari...
There are certain things I need you to do that would not be very favorable if done publicly. My records on you are incomplete. I still need to take a body profile of you. All my previous attempts have failed, as certain errors blocked my view several times...
A body profile. I have information on you, however it is still missing some info. I'm supposed to be perfect. There is nothing I cannot know. The missing info concerns your measurements in...shall we say...specific areas. I cannot gather an accurate weight, height, and other such measurements as long as...obstructions...cover your body, thus affecting your weight and height...