Death of a friend..

[tornadofan2]

Alright, I'm not sure where to place this but alright..

Today, I was cycling home with a friend, a really good friend. But, a car hit us both and he died on the way to the hospital. I only had a small wound on my head and I'm back home again. Though, I feel so bad. He died but I survived, seems no fair to me. I've been crying all day, punched the wall a few tims of my room and my fists are bleeding now..

Maybe someone can help me out?

[LonelyGreyWolf]

Oh my god! Well, you're doing the right thing. Let it all out, don't let it build up like I did, when my sister died. I'm starting to have emotional breakdowns, and you really don't want that. Trust me. (She died a few weeks ago, and I didn't even know she existed...)

But punching the wall probably wasn't a good idea. Really, it wasn't your fault. Unless you're a super hero or something, there really wasn't anything you could do. It was a car, and an idiot driving it. Rest for a while, and keep your mind off it. Roleplaying is a good idea, but sleep is better. Don't hesitate to cry or anything, and talk to someone about it too. Just don't keep your feelings in, that's the best way to go about it. :)

[tornadofan2]

Thanks LonelyGreyWolf! Well, punching the wall did release some anger but I shall try not to. I tried to sleep but I just couldn't. So.. I guess roleplaying will help me to forget it a but and feel a bit better.

I'm sorry about you're sister.

[LonelyGreyWolf]

Don't be.

[tornadofan2]

I didn't eat or drink after I got home. Normally I would but I didn't because I just was so sad and depressive.

[Jag]

I'm very sorry for your loss and the traumatic experience. I'm sure that you're going through a lot emotionally, physically, and mentaly right now and I want you to know that our thoughts are with you.

Physical violence toward yourself, as much as it may help in the moment, is a bad idea. Physical exertion such as running, lifting weights, or some other exercise will release the same endorphins without you hurting yourself. Also, I strongly recommend that you considering trying to talk to someone, be that a counselor, doctor, spiritual advisor, or someone else that you feel comfortable with that might be able to help you through this.

I hope things start to improve soon.

[tornadofan2]

Thanks Jag, that'll really help out. At the moment I'm writing my feelings down releasing some of the pain.

[ViceVersus]

Thoughts and prayers are with you, tornadofan2. I can't imagine the pain you must be going through right now. Don't be afraid to reach out to those around you for guidance and support. Stay strong.

[tornadofan2]

Thank you. It's great to see all of these people caring so much.

[tornadofan2]

Today I'm not doing any better then yesterday. I hardly slept, cried almost all night and didn't really eat or drink. Only a small cracker but I just don't feel like eating and drinking. My friends stayes in my mind, his scream just before the car hit him, how he looked.. Nothing seems to soften the pain. My dog tries to make me laugh by doing funny things and normally I would have laughed but I can't.. I can only cry..

[TheFinalOne]

How is his soul supposed to find peace when it feels guilty of making you cry?

So instead of crying, just think of all the happy moments you had with him. I assure you, you will find peace.

[tornadofan2]

I will try to do that.

[Moon/Mihael]

I know this is kinda thoughtless, but time really does heal all wounds. The pain will go away, but it'll hurt for a long time, and it'll only linger if you keep thinking about that hurt.

Here's my advice, and its worked for myself, and many others. Get yourself a job, or take an extended vacation away from where you are, like the next state or country over. Staying where you are wont help your recovery much, so get something that'll take your mind completely off the trauma. When you feel ready, go back to the city you and your friend lived in, grab a picture of him, and just remember him for an hour every day. If you feel depressed, or start crying, make your mind and body work for a while before trying to look at the picture again.

You being in the area wont help you. Either leave on a vacation now, or get a job that requires you to think and use your body a lot. Doing what you're doing now wont help you. I should know, I've been in your shoes almost a dozen times over.