Why won't people join my roleplay?

The roleplay is World of Selenia.

world-selenia-accepting-players-t68358.html

I was wondering why won't people join. Is the story too confusing, or is it not interesting enough? Is it lacking more information? What can I do to draw more players in? Thanks

Hey there, spirit_is_shining!

World RPs are always a bit tricky. There's often so much to learn, such a huge and expansive sandbox to play in, as it were, that players fresh to your concept can feel a bit lost. They're not sure where to go, or what to do.

I've read over your Introduction to your roleplay, and I am more than pleased to see that you've kept it succinct, and to the point. A problem I've seen "world" RPs have is that there's just so much lore and information that the players feel that they have to slog through. The GM feels they need to provide information on Culture, Art, Politics, Mythology, things like that. This is good content to have, of course, but hidden away, perhaps, in an OOC thread.

Another thing is that story needs to start from character. "Character is compass" is a motto I live by. Having your roleplay be titled "World of Selenia" is .. massive. Expansive. I don't know what the story is about, and I don't know who the story is about.

We are trying to gather reincarnations of the Goddess Selenia together so there can be peace on the world of Crystalis again. They hate the government which controls most of the country, and would like to see religion possible and peace happen again. The reincarnations, or descendents of Selenia, are to come from planet Earth back to Crystalis to take back what's rightfully theirs.

A rebel group has formed to fight against the oppression of the government, and they are Selenians gathered from all parts of the world. Their ban is a peaceful one so far, as they secretly plan their ways. One of the secrets is this rebel group has been trying to gather the reincarnations of Selenia for some time now, with not much success. Until recently, present day, they have gathered all the reincarnations. Which we the players will play.

^ The above is interesting! The idea of a rebel group fighting against an oppressive force has captivated audiences time and time again. Remember Star Wars? Essentially the same idea. But here's the difference though - when you think of Star Wars, the first thing you think of isn't the world. You think of the characters, and how they interact with each other.

The point I'm getting to is try to make the story smaller. The world that its set in is fantastic and can offer a wide space for players to roam around with, but you need to start on a much smaller scale to generate interest. Who is your character? Why should I care about them? What are the rebels like?

Star Wars is as much a story of Luke Skywalker finding out who he is in relation to what he's meant to be, as it is an intergalactic tale of struggle, redemption, and, well, planets! I don't think the issue is that the story is confusing - it seems more of an issue that the story itself isn't clearly defined in accessible terms to the player base.

Are you familiar with the hero's journey? It is a model that from which literally every piece of storytelling draws its roots from. There is a character that exists in an "ordinary world", and upon being faced with a challenge to leave that world, embarks on a journey that changes self, and the world around them. I'd recommend Googling it further, and letting your story be crafted from the inside out, as it were.

I really hope that made sense. Essentially - give us more characters! Give us a feel about who these people are that live in this world, and make us care about them.

Any questions, please let me know!

-VV

Thanks for the help, Vice Versus. I could name the roleplay just "Selenia" after the goddess they are trying to ressurect to bring peace on the world Crystalis again, but then it would leave out the other world in the title.

As for the rest, I could think up on it and thanks for all your tips! :)

I'd still recommend narrowing the title down even more. The title "Selenia" still doesn't tell me about the story, what's happening, the conflicts and whatnot.

All the same, thanks for posting in here! Glad I could at least be of some help.

War of Selenia
Selenian War
Crystalis Wars
Selenia's Soul
Rebels fighting back: Selenian Soul
Selenian Legends
The Gathering: Selenia Legends

Hey Hey. Here are my thoughts...

1) Visual Appeal. Adding a picture on your intro page will catch-the-eye of potential players. Also, a well chosen photo will give players an idea of the 'feel' of the story style. Dark? Romantic? Cheery? adjectives are endless...

2) Concept Clarity.
I kinda get the general idea, and I do like your themes. Reincarnation, Religion, Rebellion. However, I have no idea how these things specifically apply in the story. I don't think you need to write a book on the setting... but I need a few more pieces of information before I can figure out how to make a character within your world.

For example...

I can be Selenian or Human. What are the BIG differences between Earth and Crystalis. Since most of the game will be played here, it is a huge 'selling-point' for me. Is it technologically advanced? Matical? Aquatic? Jungley?... though are various cultures and races, it seems the big government rules the entire planet (?) somehow. This is where you will either attract players who want to play scifi, or steampunk, or fantasy (or whatever else)... I can't really tell which it is by your description, so I wouldn't apply until that was clear.

Also, what time period shall the earthlings be drawn from?

What kind of powers or attributes do the reincarnations have that the other characters do not? If there is nothing remarkable about the humans at the beginning of the rp, it would be good to say so in your intro.

What kind of government are we fighting against? Monarchy? Republic? Communist? And the rebels you say are peaceful, are they protesting? Making pamphlets? Is the government atheist? Or are church-and-state separated?

You don't have to answer ALL these questions in your intro... these are just the questions I find myself asking as I read your intro.

3) Verbage. When I read your intro, it doesn't feel quite complete. Some of your wording is awkward.

"point of the story: We are trying to gather reincarnations..." Who is "we?" The player characters? The Selenians? The church? some other organization? The rebels? LATER you go on to say that the rebels are looking for Reincarnations.

"Until recently, present day, they have gathered all the reincarnations. Which we the players will play.

Players can also play people from the rebel group as well. This group will also have players who will serve as guardians of the reincarnations/descendents as well."

Minor inconsistency, but affects the way your overall paragraph sounds and feels to readers. I'd just do some minor editing, ask some buddies to edit and proofread for you. You are trying to appeal to writers, so, by cleaning up your own writing you shall increase my likeliness to join you.

In this particular example I would clean it up by making it a list instead.

You can play...
An earthling: You are a reincarnation yadayadada. You have to be human, this is what makes you special...
A Rebel: Yadayadayada this is what makes you special...
A Guardian: You are a rebel assigned/magically empowered protector/whatever it is/yadayadayada this is what makes you special...

(I like feeling special)

4) Character Profiles. If you are playing a character in the world, OR have a major NPC in mind for the plot, build a character as an example. I often look through the existing character profiles when deciding weather or not to join an rp.

This also gives you the opportunity to give more information outside of your intro. I.E. you make a profile for the rebel leader, I can read more about the rebellion.

5) Magic. You are leaving it open, which can be tricky once you start getting character profiles. With no 'gauge' one character will think they have made a decent mage who has been studying for 40 years and can heal broken bones and raise some zombies... then another character applies with an apprentice that can open black holes. (aaaawkward.) Also, I assume the reincarnations will be special in some way... what kind of powers or abilities to do they start with that other characters *can't* do. Can earthlings start with magic?

From the perspective of a player looking to join an rp, these are the things that stand out to me personally. Maybe no one else ^^;; Use salt when thinking about my response.

Also, if you'd like me to elaborate or clarify anything I have said just ask. (I'm kinda sick n zonked right now ;P)

GOOD LUCK! :D

Thanks Eyeris for the feedback. Very much appreciated. Also, I wrote back to your response about you playing a government official? More information is revealed inside! Thanks!