Bullying

batmanfan93 · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **batmanfan93** on Sat Nov 10, 2012 2:46 am

this has been eatting at me all my life. i am 19, 20 in february and all my life i have been outcasted due to what people think i should be. growing up as a kid you should have fun and not worry about such things but as i and many many others have come to find out its hard to just live a fun life as a kid when you have these kids bullying you or outcasting you for no reason. i mean you are a kid.. you are all the same so why pick one or 2 out and just pick on them and shove them out of everything? when that happens it puts a mark on them that somehow everyone sees. even if its just meeting you for the first time its just known. so why do people do it and why does it seem noone is trying to help that. while these assholes who do this to people get ahead in life the outcasts just hurt. some use that hurt and become bigger things and thats my plan. i wanna become a famous rockstar and i want to stick up for all those kids, teens, and adults who we and are pushed around and outcasted for just being them. i feel noone does enough to do anything about it and if i can reach out with music then so be it. thats my goal in life and i intend on meeting it any way i can. music has always helped me but it saddens me i will never get the time to meet my idols. one way to meet them is to become one of them myself. i wanna make everyone feel like they can look up to me as i look up to my idols. thats what everyone wants really. i just feel i have to go above and beyond to ensure that something happens. im not asking for any hand outs or anything just for people to listen. ive never spoken or voiced any of my opinions or feelings because of what society has done and made me.. but ill take the tools its given me and better myself so that i may help or attempt to help those who are in my position or who will be. i wanna be the voice of this all one day and show every outcast that one day you too can do what i have done. i have a long road ahead of me but im willing to take it so that i can make the road easier for others. so please if anyone reads this let me know how you feel and your thoughts. tell me your story if you want. i will read all and if you just want someone to listen ill be that person. this is my first time making a forum so please excuse the terrible grammar and all. i just want to be heard and maybe this can be my foot in the door for my future goals. thank you all!!!

Modesty · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Modesty** on Sat Nov 10, 2012 1:33 pm

Hey batmanfan93,

Let me start by saying welcome and thanks for showing an interest in the community. The Discussion & Debate forum is just that: topics and questions, often controversial, posed to other users in order to see a multifaceted view on the subject. With that said, in order to facilitate either discussion or debate, the posed topic (in your case, I believe, "bullying") you need to state a cohesive thought or question, usually backed by some kind of proof or life experience in order to explain your point of view.

I feel yours is more of a journal entry. I have changed your thread title for something more specific. Allow me to help pull out a few questions you have grazed that is more inviting for other users to join it:

- Were / are you bullied?
- Have you ever bullied someone?
- What drives someone to be a bully?
- How can one overcome bullying?
- Have you ever stood up for someone being bullied?

Furthermore, batmanfan93, I apologize that you have experienced negativity from other people in your life. People bully for different reasons, most often because they themselves have been a target of negativity, experience jealousy or are damaged in their own way and gain a sense of power over being mean to others. They often don't know how to deal appropriately with their own pain or issues and lash out. I urge you to seek out help if it is needed, from places like Kids Help Phone (which is also available to Teens and Young Adults). I will agree with you that while there are parts of society that are messed up, but there are parts of this society that are beautiful too-- examples of such I've seen right here on RPG. I think your dreams of helping people are quite valiant, and wish you all the best.

dealing with it · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **dealing with it** on Thu Dec 06, 2012 8:26 pm

I had rivalries and an arch-nemesis. I don't think that counts as bullying, because it went both ways. I think what I encountered is what people are actually thinking about when they say things like "boys will be boys". It was a far cry from bullying.

On the Internet, I've got the unlimited capacity to be a jerk, especially since one of my mentors had an obsession with breaking down people's egos for the purposes of what he considered spiritual enlightenment. A bit of that abrasiveness has rubbed off on me. He described the process of enlightenment as setting a person's ego/emotions on fire until there's nothing left to burn.

As well, my treatment by the mental health institution makes me a bit short-tempered with people who don't really deserve the brunt of my aggression. I can't take out my anger on the institution without repercussions, but I see red when people express beliefs that, even in their cloudy and youthful form lead to other beliefs I can't tolerate. I guess I've done my share of cyber-bullying. It's not right to assume that everyone has a thick skin to protect them, and it's not right to assume that every little idea is going to lead to a final, absolute conclusion. (I can't rightly say that I'm enlightened according to my mentor's standards, but I don't judge myself by his standard any more.)

I have, however, taken the brunt of the damage when someone else is getting bullied online. So I have stood up for people getting bullied, but it's usually discreet, because if I told the person I was protecting what I was doing, they might get offended. So yes, I have stood up for people who get bullied.

Colonel_Masters · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Colonel_Masters** on Thu Dec 06, 2012 9:23 pm

Well I see Bullying as the fight of the Individual against the hoard, the Hoard views individuals as its enemies and attempt to crush individuals and this is in my eyes Bullying.

I suffered Bullying during my childhood, for a time the majority of my class was quite nasty to me and made every possible effort to make me feel unwelcome and inadequate. At first i attempted to rejoin society however as bad turned to worse i retreated to myself and accepted the fate of an outcast trusting no one and befriending the few fellow outcasts in my class.

Later some of my persecutors attempted to reconcile with me however I was bitter and unforgiving and sent them away, One of their number i reluctantly began to talk to because he was involved in the same theater project i was however i never forgave him for his part in the Bullying.

When I moved at first i remained within myself because i did not posses the social skills to befriend new people however for a time i did attempt to become a member of society. Recently ( a year or so) as i grew to meet many fellow individuals I grew to realize that there is nothing for me among the sheep which make up society at large and grew to despise popular culture seeing it as an oppressive, primitive and disgusting. I have a large circle of friends who are all Individuals and together we form our own unique society, I admit that we are quite elitist but I feel that considering the alternative; accepting a way of life I reject and despise i rather be an elitist and maybe a bit of a snob then be a sheep and a weakling.

The period of Bullying in my life aided me in realizing that i am different from the majority of people and helped me create my own individual personality but i do not forgive or forget the cowards who made my life a misery for so long.

Edit: i also do not forgive myself for being so weak during that time and regret not taking the fight to them.

Shi-chan · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Shi-chan** on Mon Dec 10, 2012 12:33 pm

I've been bullied.

I have bullied others to save my own hide.

I have tried to protect others as I got older.

I have a dear friend who I once bullied. Everybody did. I went along, in order to not become an outcast myself. I was horrible to her, and not a day goes by where I'm not ashamed of the things I did and said. But then one day, she (and a shared acquaintance) came up to me and asked if I wanted to help them build a treehouse. My dad's a carpenter, so they assumed I knew what to do. I had no friggin' idea, but I said yes anyway. We spent a summer building our little fort, and we laughed, and ate candy and had sleepovers and we didn't give a damn about the rest of the world.

The girl I'd bullied had forgiven me right away. Perhaps she never held a grudge. Since then we've been friends. Making it through whatever life threw at us. She's studying to become a teacher now, and I'm very proud of her. :)

But of course I got bullied when she and I became friends. But we had each other to confide in. We kept listening to our heavy metal and rock n' roll, we kept dressing the way we wanted, we kept our heads held high because we were fuckin' badass. Sometimes we picked fights, sometimes we had to run. We were the weirdoes, but in time we found more of our kind. There's a lot of us now, and we're a very diverse group. But we were all bullied or made outcasts at some point in our life, so we're always kind to others, and we always welcome those who needs friends.

I'm afraid I can't give you much advise, I can only tell you to live a life you will be proud of. Forgive those who deserve it, forget the rest. Some people bully out of fear, others because of peer pressure, and some do it because they're assholes, simple as that. Do what you must, but make sure that you don't become the bully.

spayce · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **spayce** on Tue Dec 25, 2012 2:13 am

Bullies pick on people that they are jealous of. It was psychologically proven that people bully those who have certain qualities that they don't have or they see something in that person that they don't like in themselves. They feel like they aren't as special, or important as someone else in a certain way so they target that person and put them down to establish themselves by dominating. Feeling dominate over someone else is a way of self assurance for instance "if I make them hate themselves more than I hate myself than I am better than them". I don't have advice on getting people to stop bullying. In all honesty I believe the only person who can get a bully to stop bullying is the bullies themselves. What you can do is make their opinion of you completely irrelevant. You have to remind yourself that after you graduate you will most likely never see them again and you wont care what they think of you because you won't think of them at all.

Aniihya · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Aniihya** on Wed Dec 26, 2012 1:50 pm

I have been bullied until at a point I fought back, even physically. It helped alot that I made people reflect on themselves when they looked in the mirror to see their filthy, superficial mouths bleed. People always saw me as the odd child and even my parents say there is something evil about me. I wouldn't say that I am evil, I just effectively intimidate foul mouths, mainstreamers and rude brutes in a way that changes their way of interaction with me. I prefer people who are polite and try to understand what I say. Many have turned their backs on me because of my lack of being able to express myself. I have been working for three weeks now and the boss already got complaints that people feel that I talk down on them (although I try my best not to). I explained myself and with constant complements about my intelligence my boss said he will talk to the other employees about the matter so that they keep in mind that I am not a ruthless smartass but just lack the ability to express myself right. Since then the atmosphere at work seemed a bit looser and people keep their calm.

Amnesty · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Amnesty** on Sun Jan 13, 2013 12:25 pm

I often find that if someone is bullied as a child (which happens quite often, since little children may look innocent but can be very harsh and cruel to their peers), it really damages ones image of himself. This, in turn, leads to more bullying in later stages of life, since people can easily see when someone is vulnerable to it. I myself have been bullied in elementary school, up to the age of twelve. After that I went to a different school, but people immediately knew I was an easy target, and thus the bullying continued.

It took me a long time (and a loving girlfriend) before I started to change my attitude towards myself. It immediately showed results in my environment, and thank goodness I'm finally rid of the bullying.

Peachyllion · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Peachyllion** on Sat Jan 26, 2013 8:18 pm

batmanfan93 wrote:this has been eatting at me all my life. i am 19, 20 in february and all my life i have been outcasted due to what people think i should be. growing up as a kid you should have fun and not worry about such things but as i and many many others have come to find out its hard to just live a fun life as a kid when you have these kids bullying you or outcasting you for no reason. i mean you are a kid.. you are all the same so why pick one or 2 out and just pick on them and shove them out of everything? when that happens it puts a mark on them that somehow everyone sees. even if its just meeting you for the first time its just known. so why do people do it and why does it seem noone is trying to help that. while these assholes who do this to people get ahead in life the outcasts just hurt. some use that hurt and become bigger things and thats my plan. i wanna become a famous rockstar and i want to stick up for all those kids, teens, and adults who we and are pushed around and outcasted for just being them. i feel noone does enough to do anything about it and if i can reach out with music then so be it. thats my goal in life and i intend on meeting it any way i can. music has always helped me but it saddens me i will never get the time to meet my idols. one way to meet them is to become one of them myself. i wanna make everyone feel like they can look up to me as i look up to my idols. thats what everyone wants really. i just feel i have to go above and beyond to ensure that something happens. im not asking for any hand outs or anything just for people to listen. ive never spoken or voiced any of my opinions or feelings because of what society has done and made me.. but ill take the tools its given me and better myself so that i may help or attempt to help those who are in my position or who will be. i wanna be the voice of this all one day and show every outcast that one day you too can do what i have done. i have a long road ahead of me but im willing to take it so that i can make the road easier for others. so please if anyone reads this let me know how you feel and your thoughts. tell me your story if you want. i will read all and if you just want someone to listen ill be that person. this is my first time making a forum so please excuse the terrible grammar and all. i just want to be heard and maybe this can be my foot in the door for my future goals. thank you all!!!

I think that's a great dream and it's wonderful that you want to use these experiences to help you grow.
I'll support you, so keep at it! Update with us on your progress, and especially if you need any encouragement.

Cherrylyn · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Cherrylyn** on Mon Jan 28, 2013 9:18 pm

During my years in elementary school and high school, I had never been the subject to bullying, and I have never bullied anyone, but my older sister was bullied throughout school. The reason the bullying began for her was because she had stood up someone who was already being bullied. They stayed friends throughout elementary school, and once high school came the girls who treated them that way grew up. My sister is still friends with a few of those girls. I believe that there are many reasons for bullying, but sometimes people just need to mature and learn more about other people.

bladewolf175 · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **bladewolf175** on Wed Jan 30, 2013 5:17 am

I've been an outcast throughout my high school years. I've been bullied because if the way I act, look, and because of my race. I pretty much live in a place that is filled with more immature people than people with common sense. I got through it by joinning a community just like this. I found many people, using the internet, who share the same interests as me. I guess I just needed someone to say "You are perfect the way you are." Honestly, I like being different. I find that it gives me character and personality. Although, I do love to analyze people and their behaviors.

As to why people bully others, there are so many reasons. The few I observed are from self confidence issues. From what I find, people who suffer from lack of self confidence may need to find a way to feel superior. So by looking and pointing out the flaws of someone else; they can ignore their own. It's kind of like a shield they can hide behind. As for the people who don't want to help, I feel that they do not want to be the next target.

Well that's all I have to say.

Questionable Object · **Tips:** 0.00 INK by **Questionable Object** on Thu Feb 07, 2013 7:14 am

I have spent my whole life as an outcast, bullied and pushed around and it was only through utter total apathy that I survived.
But through this I have found a simile which I believe sums up children and in effect all humans.

People are like chickens.
Even when there is plenty, when there is no call for it, they will take the weakest of their flock and they will torment them, they will torment them until they do not care any more, they have fled from the flock or they are dead.
People are like chickens.

Bullying

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