Marx's Journal of Paranoia

Greetings. My name is Sebastian Marx. That is all anyone needs to know.

If you are reading this, I'd advise you to stop now. For one thing, I'd be most displeased if you read this, and I can strangle you with more ease that you can turn a page. No, don't actually turn a page, unless it is the cover page and you're putting this book back where it belongs.

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These are the opinions I currently hold about my fellow companions here at the warehouse.

Monsonwa amuses me, honestly. She's a game, make her mad and watch her silly little emotions jerk her around. She's one that I'd keep around just to make myself feel better about myself, one-upping her is great fun. I don't hate her, but really, for these purposes, I do. She's the Scarlet to my Rhett, but without all that romance crap. I'd never fall in love with anyone, let alone that little....


Haine is an odd bird. I rather admire his bluntness, despite the fact that speaking one's mind is a bad idea unless used carefully. it leads to too many strings hanging loose. Sometimes he seems like Ember's puppy dog though, which is hilarious.

Ember is cold. I like that about her. She works well with her little puppy dog, I think. At the same time, I avoid her. Sometimes it feels like she can read my mind, which is uncomfortable to say the least. He quiet clean work is beautiful though, I envy it. Although, there's no fun unless there's a mess to be made sometimes. There's a certain...relish... in smearing some blood around. She doesn't know what she's missing, eh?

Miyamoto is one young man I've got no grief against. He's actually quite interesting to watch, with those quite little sadisms though. I give him props for his soft intelligence. It does wonders for the air about him. I don't like what he seems to have against cats though. Those critters are the most beautiful killing machines I've ever laid eyes on, and I've made it my creed to save all those poor buggers from the boyo before he can kill them.

Vivian is my tamer. I rather like her. She's got a wide mind and a small mouth. I don't know much about her, despite the fact that I pursue her company often, making that alliance is very important to me, it would not bode well if my tamer was nervous around me or disliked me.

Marlen makes me want to throw something at the wall or set something on fire just to get that taste out of my mouth. Really. Euch. How can she stand to be so...so....vulnerable? She's so consumed in everyone else... I just can't fathom it. But she is useful, I'll give her that. So I just try to keep to myself around her and treat her with the same 'respect' I give the others. But really. She sickens me sometimes.

Fairchild is a girl I appreciate. That cold stare is something I honestly wish I could steal for myself. I keep to myself, and she keeps to herself though, which is fine with me. She doesn't seem to be one for competition, so I haven't egged her on like I do Monswona to see if she'll snap at me. It'd be pretty funny though. Maybe in the future?

De'veres is a fine example of someone controlled by his lack of control, children. I avoid him like the plague. Nothing good will come from that boyo. That and sometimes it feels like he just wants to stick his fingers in my mind and stir all the emotions and their strings out. I hate that. I ignore him to the best of my ability. The monster side of him is pretty alright though. The switching between both sides is worrisome though. He's got reins like a horse, and someday someone is going to grab them and yank him back, I'll betcha five bucks and a handshake on that.

Dashkov is a good man. He's the only one of this sorry bunch that I truly respect. Partly because he's got me beat by two years. 'respect your elders, sonny'. He keeps busy and keeps quite. He's got a head about him. He don't have any strings hanging out where anyone could grab them, and he doesn't seem all that interested in grabbing anyone else's. Sometimes he makes me feel uneasy though. I don't trust anything that's too perfect. Hell, I don't trust anything at all, but who can blame me, eh?

Luka, Luka, Luka. What can I say about him? That I appreciate the irony of his little string weapon, because it seems to be the only string he has? Well I do. But that's besides the point. he makes me uneasy, to put it bluntly. He isn't like Dashkov, that bugger keeps himself busy. Luka is just... I don't know. He's there. He's like the help, a servant, if you will. He's there, ready to bring aide, but one don't know anything about him. I hate that he's always there. It makes me feel twitchy, to be honest.

Splinter is alright. She's sort of like a light fixture to me, I admit. I acknowledge her, she me, and that is it. I have no desire to know her better, but I do appreciate her bluntness and the distance she seems to have while lacking a cold shell. She's a bit too...helpful to me though. I'd appreciate her more if she just held her own. Eh, ya win some and lose some.

Ren irritates me. Maybe it is the little-boy vibe, or the way his emotions jerk him back and forth. He makes me uncomfortable just to be around. Like he's contagious or something. I try to avoid him as much as possible for simplicity's sake.

Arden. Keep. Him. Away. From. Me. For the love of all things sane, do not let him near me. Do not want. Not only does he have the optimist thing going on, as well as touches of the childishness, but his power. No. I don't want someone knowing everything about me, I just don't. If it were not for that I might be alright with him, I enjoy that he has his priorities straight, but thinking about...it just gives me chills. Just keep him far away please.


Overall, I feel like I've got to be on my toes all the time around this lot. Whether it is playing with them or avoiding them, or saving an unfortunate feline's life from them, there's something about everyone. I expected that though, when we escaped. The only time I can be truly at ease is when I'm not there, when I'm beserker. And I hate that too. Which leaves my insides feeling very tense. I'll keep my face clean for the others though, and mind myself.

We'll get through this, and maybe someday I will be able to escape all this wariness and live alone or something. That would be nice.